Chapter 2

Sam's POV

„Hey, Frirgin!" I yell when Freddie comes over to my locker. Of course everyone is staring at him. Yeah, I know, girls who have a crush on a boy usually try to act all girly, nice and cute and this whole stuff. But since I am trying to hide my feelings for him, I will just be meaner and ruder to him, especially after he said that I am cute. Baby, I will show ya that I am not.

"First of all: Hey Samantha. And second, how do you know?" He has a huge smirk on his face (that looks good by the way) and thinks he can call me Samantha without getting penalized? Oh, I acted not Sam-ish way too long.

"First of all…" I punch him, "you should call me Sam, okay? And second I do know because no girl on the entire planet would do that with you." I start to laugh when he rolls his eyes.

I won't let him answer or anything like that. He should know that he is the underdog.

"Speaking of girls that would not do that with you… where's Carly?" Again he rolls his eyes and I can't help but be annoyed by his stupid crush. How long does he plan to be her little puppy? And I thought he realized that she just loves him when he jumps in front of a truck… Come on Sam, stop being jealous.

"Carly isn't feeling so well…" Maybe it's the way he says that or the worried look on his face but 'not feeling well' seems to be an understatement.

"Why? What's wrong with her?" Freddie scratches the back of his head which makes me just more curious.

"It's nothing, she is just… I don't know. "

"You do know, Freddie. Tell me what's wrong with her." Even though there are not a lot of things and persons I care about, there are some people that are really important to me. And one of them is Carly so I don't need Freddie to hide something from me.

"She was just a little bit confused yesterday when she came home." Confused? Why doesn't he want to tell me the whole truth? I am her best friend; I have a right to know.

"Tell me, Benson. It's getting annoying. I want to know why Carly isn't in school and what happened last night. And don't tell me she was 'just a little bit confused'." I step closer to him, looking him right in the eyes. If he doesn't get that I will get angry if he doesn't tell me… he is stupid.

"Okay!" He steps backwards, "When she got home she was acting totally paranoid. Every time she heard a noise she turned around and startled to death. But she didn't want to tell Spencer what was wrong so he called me and I came over but she didn't tell me either. She just seemed to be scared of something. Spencer and I were both up the whole night." Only now I see the bags under Freddie's eyes. He does look tired and I don't wanna know how Spencer looks like. God, what's wrong with Carly? She never acted this way. But…

"Why didn't you call me? Maybe she would've told me." After all I am her best friend and know her longer than Freddie does.

"I wanted to but then I thought your mother wouldn't let you…" Nice try. Does he think I am stupid? Do I look like I am? I don't think so.

"We both know that my mom doesn't give a crap if I am at home or not." And before he can defend himself I grab his collar and push him against the locker. People look in our direction but I don't care. I am just really angry right now and it's his fault.

"Tell me why you didn't call me?" I yell at him. But instead of stuttering, he just looks at me.

"You know, I am not in the mood." It doesn't sound arrogant or mean like you might expect. He says it really friendly.

Still, I look at him in disbelieve. Of course he didn't want to call me.

"You wanted to be alone with Carly, that's all. How can you just care about yourself when she's-", I start to yell again but he interrupts me.

"No! That's not right! She didn't want to talk to you!" Now he is yelling too. But, god, he is a lying, little bastard.

"Oh please! You just thought if she is confused enough you two will have a little moment because you could be her 'hero' again." And even though I don't want to, this stupid monster named jealousy is coming out of his hole to make me crazy.

"That's ridiculous! I told her that I would call you but she was just getting crazier and had this scared look on her face and said 'Please don't! Don't call Sam!'" If this is even possible I get just angrier.

"This is so low. She needed help and all you wanted to do was-" This is a kind of angriness I don't know. My voice sounds so calm but my blood is boiling.

"Sam… I am telling you the truth, believe me." He can look at me with his stupid brown eyes like he wants to… I don't care.

"I don't, that's why I will go to her apartment after school." I didn't know that I could be angry, disappointed, sad, worried and jealous at the same time.

"That's not a good i-" I throw a glance at him that makes him shut up and that's the first thing I like about this conversation.

After school

Okay, my plan to go to Carly after school seemed to be good but I guess I didn't thought that through. Well, since Freddie is living in the same building as Carly and he and I are walking to Bushwell Plaza at the same time.

And that would be great if he and I wouldn't have had a fight before. That's why I decided to be extra slow when I put my books in my locker until Freddie finally leaves. How crazy is that? I want to be longer in school than I have to?

However, this plan doesn't work either. Freddie has the same idea, he stands at his locker looks around, talks to a strange kid I have never seen before and wastes time.

If I was clever and not stubborn I would just go to Carly's apartment, but since this was my plan he should be the one who leaves first. Of course I do care about Carly but I am kind of scared how she'll react. What if Freddie is right and she doesn't want to see me? And what if I start to believe this liar? Then I am stupid. He is lying; I am pretty sure about that.

"Sam?" That is Freddie's voice and yes, I will act like I am in kindergarten and run away. Why? Because I had a fight with him, he lied to me and I just don't want to communicate with him? Yes.

"Oh come on! You're acting immature!" Ignore him, Sam. He is stupid, don't let him provoke you, just ignore him. I take a deep breath to calm myself down. Then I open the door and leave this stupid school. And now I'll go to Carly and ask her what is going on. And she'll tell me. I am her best friend after all.

In Bushwell Plaza

Like thousand times before I knock on Carly's door. And as usual, I hear Spencer coming down the stairs, only slower than he's used to.

Then after what felt like an eternity, Spencer finally opens the door.

"Oh, I thought you were Freddie. Hey Sam!" Usually I would say something mean to him now. He thought I was Freddie? He deserves a punch in his face. But today I can't do that. He looks worse than Freddie. He is pale, has dark circles around his eyes and just looks like he needs a little rest.

"Spence, you look horrible. Why don't you take a break and I take care of Carly, okay?" Without being asked to, I walk in and throw my backpack on the couch.

"I don't know, she's really upset."

"Yeah, that's why I want to talk to her. I am her best friend," Why do I have to repeat that so often? "she will tell me."

Spencer sighs and closes his eyes. Does he really need to think about that? Maybe Freddie told me the truth and she really doesn't want to see me. Oh, forget that, Sam, Freddie is a liar.

"Fine, but if she freaks out you have to promise me that you'll leave immediately." He puts my backpack on the ground and lies down on the couch. I bet he will be asleep before I'm in Carly's room.

"I promise." After I say that, I run up the stairs and seconds later I am in front of her door. Even though I've never really done that before, I knock on the door. I don't want to startle her. But I don't wait for an answer, I just go in.

"Hey Carly!" She's sitting on her bed with her hair all messy. When I come in she screams, Freddie was right, she's acting like she's paranoid. Her eyes widen and she looks at me like I am a zombie.

"It's just me, Sam." Yeah, like she doesn't know that. But still I say that with a really, not sam-ish, friendly voice.

I come closer to her bed and she still doesn't say anything. Instead she just sits there, shocked, her widely opened eyes still staring at me. How could Freddie think he could try to make a move while she's in such a condition? That is so ridiculous. And why do I think about that nub again?

"Carly, what happened to you? Did anyone do anything to you? Did you saw something awful?" Probably these many questions are overstraining her; she starts to scream again and crawls backwards like a wild animal. Then she starts to yell at me.

"Leave!" She yells hysterically. "Go away!" She is starting to cry and throws a pillow at me.

"Get out of here!" But I can't move. I just stand there too shocked to do anything. Freddie was right; she doesn't want me to be here. Me, her best friend.

She keeps yelling at me, telling me that I should leave, louder and louder. And I am not able to say something. What the hell happened? What made her so scared of me?

Suddenly Spencer comes in. He grabs my arm and pulls me to the door that he closes after we're out of the room. The last thing I hear is 'I hate you'.

Spencer's voice doesn't reach me. I go downstairs, take my backpack and leave the apartment. The apartment that has became my second home over the years, where my best friend lives in, where I had always been welcome in.

I lean against the wall and take a deep breath. Something horrible happened to her. Maybe she got raped on her way home. That would explain why she's so scared. But not why she hates me. Why would she hate me? I didn't do anything to her. I would never do anything to hurt her. So why does she hate me? Yesterday everything has been alright. We were together in the Groovy Smoothie before she and Adam had another date. We laughed together. She showed me the number of a pizza place. Some boy who works there gave it to her and said it was the best pizza place of the world. However, yesterday everything has been normal and now she hates me.

"See, I've told you the truth." There's no smile on his face, no grin that would show his victory. Of course it hasn't been about winning when we fought. But I feel like a loser anyway.

"Sam," He looks at me, a worried and serious look on his face. "I wished I was wrong about it." I know that it also means that he doesn't want to fight anymore. He's honest about it and all I have to do is to nod or smile or just say 'It's fine.' and our fight would be officially over.

But I don't.

It's not because of my pride, my stubbornness or puberty. It's not because I'm still angry at him, I haven't been angry at him anymore since I found out that he was telling me the truth. It's just because I want to leave, want to get out of here, want to breathe fresh air and just be on my own.

"Sam…" And just when I turn around and am about to change my mind and about to apologize, Spencer opens the door.

"Freddie? Would you mind taking care of Carly for about an hour? I just need to sleep." Before Freddie nods and goes in he looks at me. I try to hold his gaze just for a few seconds and hope he understands what I'm trying to say through my eyes. But he doesn't. Way too fast he turns around again and disappears in Carly's apartment. I already mentioned that I feel like a loser? Well, now I feel like a lonely loser.

I'm standing in front of Bushwell Plaza and imagine what the brunette is doing now. Ahhh, I've done a great job, but she might be fine after a month or two… if she gets an amazing therapist. I must admit, it was not hard to break her, I thought it might be more difficult… Oh well, it was still interesting to see how relationships can get destroyed in less than a second. Just one thing and years of friendship or love are over, in a blink of an eye. That's why I prefer being alone.

Huh, the blonde is rushing out of the building, she definitely talked to the drama queen, yah, she doesn't like you anymore. Sad, right? Just leave and go home. Cry a little and get over it. Leave her behind, you don't need her.

But why aren't you leaving? You just go back and forth, run your fingers through your beautiful blonde curls and think. At least that's what it looks like. You wonder why she hates you? You'll never know, even though you're smart.

Oh, don't go back inside; you're wasting your time. Leave her behind, she doesn't want you anymore. Don't go back inside… Don't, my beautiful blonde princess.

Sam's POV

I sit down on his bed. My brain's tired of thinking. My legs feel numb and it's hard for me to believe that I actually made it upstairs into his apartment.

All that happened in the last hours flashes through my mind. The voice of Carly echoes in my head and I see Freddie's glance before me. But like I said, I can't really think about it anymore and every part of my body wants to rest. That's why I automatically lay down on his bed.

As I rest my head on his pillow, close my eyes and take a deep breath, the scent of Freddie fills my nostrils. Hopefully, he'll forgive me; I wished he was already here. I want to talk to him about everything. I just desperately need his presence.

Oh, Freddie, he was really trying to protect me… sort of. He didn't want me to get hurt. He cares about me, maybe not the way I care about him, but in a very friendship-ish way. Maybe that is all I can get, maybe it's enough.

As long as he smiles at me and is around me, I am happy. That's at least what I try to tell myself all the time.

Before I fall asleep, I mumble 'I love you, dork' into the pillow, imagining how the pillow keeps the words for me so that they don't keep dancing on my tongue. Then I dream of him. His gorgeous smile. His brown eyes. His smooth lips. Every detail of his face is important in my dreams, 'cause they make it feel so real.

I don't have time to think about Carly and that she hates me and somehow it's good to get it out of my head for a few minutes.

Freddie's POV

I open the door. When I notice the blonde lying on my bed, I'm kind of relieved. Yeah, she was mean to me and I should be mad at her. But how could I be mad at her? I don't know what Carly told her but it must've really hurt her, she looked so sad. I just can try to imagine how she feels right now. But now that she's here I can talk to her… after she slept a while. She deserves rest.

I sit down in front of my laptop and turn it on. Yeah, I wanted to take a nap but that's kind of not possible right now. Just imagine what she'd do to me!

After few seconds the iCarly page is on my screen and I start to check the comments. It's been a while since I wrote a new blog and right now I'm not in the mood to. Why? No need to explain.

There are mostly positive comments for our latest webcast, as usual. Are we even going to make a new webcast next week? If Carly won't get better during the next few days it definitely won't be possible.

I get distracted from my thoughts when I read a comment some fan wrote.

'Hey, Sam, you looked super great! I'm living in Seattle, let's meet sometime. Here's a picture of me and that's my email-address:….'

Being really curious, I click on the link. A new window pops up and a really good-looking guy grins at me. He has blonde hair, brown eyes and really white teeth. Optically he would be the perfect boyfriend for her.

I close the window and delete the comment.

"Freddie?" Startled to death I turn around, hoping that she isn't behind me and saw what I was doing. She would kill me. But she doesn't. Lucky me.

"Hi, Sam. Had nice dreams?" For some reason she blushes, don't tell me she already read this comment and saw the picture and fell in love and- She looks just amazingly adorable and cute when she blushes...

Let's pray she can't read my mind.

She stands up without answering my question and comes closer to me, than she stands in front of me and looks down.

"Listen, Freddie, I'm sorry for being so harsh to you earlier and for sleeping in your bed." She still looks at her feet. Sam's not used to apologizing, obviously.

"You can sleep in my bed all the time if you want." She looks at me a little shocked and I realize what I just said.

"Uhm, I mean, no, god no, I mean… You're welcome in my bed all of the time."

"What?" Sam looks at me, please, don't kill me. Please, I just wanted to say something to make things less awkward. That worked really well.

"I don't mean it that way, it's just-"

"You better keep quiet and let me talk."

"Good idea." Still embarrassed, I look at her and see a slight smile appearing on her face.

"Look, Freddie, I was just pissed because of Carly…" Her ocean blue eyes seem to become a shade darker when she mentions Carly's name and the smile her mouth was about to form, disappears too. I feel so sorry for her; I know she doesn't like that.

"It's okay, really." I don't really know if this fight was huge enough to stand up and give her a hug but I do anyway. It's maybe not the perfect timing but oh well. She really looks like she needs a bit comfort. Of course she does. Her best friend doesn't want to see her. So I just wrap my arms around her.

At first she doesn't seem to be that comfortable with me having my arms around her but after a while she relaxes and even hugs me back. Her hair smells good, like vanilla, what shampoo is she using?

"Thank you…" She mumbles and right after that she takes a deep breath and lets go of me. I know this sounds ridiculous… but I'm kind of sad that this didn't last a little longer. It doesn't happen that often that it's just the two of us and that we are so close. Yeah, Freddie, run to your mommy and cry.

"No problem." After I said it I realize it sounds kind of stupid and not necessary.

"So, how is Carly doing?" Sam asks after she sat down on my bed. She looks up at me, am I just imagining this or does she have tears in her eyes.

"Well," I sit down next to her, "she was more upset than before when I came in her room but when she noticed it was me she…" Sam still looks at me waiting for me to continue but I can't help but stare at her face, she still looks sad, that's why I decide to let out the part of Carly smiling at me.

"Freddie...?" When her lips form my name, I focus on them, wondering if they still feel, if they still taste like when we kissed the first time. I'd be ready to find it out and distract her from Carly and all the other problems she has.

"Freddie?" There's a part from me that wants her to say my name over and over. God, since when do I think of her like that? It's Sam, not Carly. Also when Carly smiled at me today I was seriously happy… but just because that meant she felt better.

"Freddie!" I almost get a heart attack when Sam's face is right in front of me. But thanks god, I can't keep thinking about her lips this way. She's so close that I can feel her warm breath on my lips. But honestly, she looks like wants to kill me.

"Would you finally tell me how Carly acted when you took care of her?" Again I start to stare at her eyes, damn it.

"I w-w-will tell you, right now." Her eyes, even though they are staring at me with this 'You're dead'-look, they still look sad. Stop staring at her!

"I hope so." Then she finally turns away and just lies down on my bed.

"She calmed down after she saw me and then I just sat around and tried to get her to tell me what happened. But she didn't say a lot. Just that she is scared of him but not who he is. And when I asked her why she doesn't want to see you she said…" I look at Sam and am not sure if I should tell her.

"Just say it, I can handle it." But the way her voice breaks and the tear that is lingering in the corner of her left eye makes it hard for me to believe that. Still, I say it.

"She didn't say exactly why, she just said that she doesn't want to see you or anyone from your family ever again and that... she hates you." Now the tear is no longer lingering in her eye, it's falling down her face right on my bed sheet.

"My family, too? Wow. I didn't do anything to her..." She starts to sob in a silent way. I've seen Sam cry before but the way she lays on my bed, her hands on her stomach, tears falling down her face just makes me want to cry too.

"It has definitely to do with him, whoever he is…" I whisper, lying down next to her. I turn my face in her direction, she doesn't look back. She's trying so hard not to sob loudly. So I just risk my life another time today.

I just put my right arm around her and pull her closer to me so that her head is resting on my chest. But she quickly wipes the tears away that just won't stop falling down her beautiful face and stands up.

"I'm okay." She lies and tries to stop her hands from shaking. I would love to hold them, make her calm down, comfort her but after she didn't even let me hold her, I just don't dare to.

Sam's POV

What the hell is this guy thinking? I love him, tried to hide it for so long and he seems to try his best to make me spit it out. First hugging me, now trying to press my body against him? Is he sick or something? Usually, I am strong, I learned to control myself when I'm around him, trying my best to give nothing away and now he starts to do something like this?

The idiot I'm in love with for no good reason (okay, there are tons of good reasons for that but oh well) looks away and out of the window. It's raining. Yeah, it's a little bit raining in her, too. Why won't these stupid tears stop coming out of my eyes? It makes me feel so weak and vulnerable. Damn, damn, damn it.

"Won't touch you ever again. No need to be afraid. I'm never going to try to be a good friend ever again." Ahh, of course, now it's my fault. Wouldn't have been a lie like 'Everything's gonna be fine.' enough? No, instead he has to make me feel his touch burning on my skin, the heat making its way to my heart where it becomes unbearable pain.

"That's just fine with me." I grimace and throw a deadly look at him that hasn't a lot of effect, since he's still focusing on the rain outside. But somehow, maybe just for a second, I can see that he looks hurt. But before I can make myself believe that it's not my fantasy, he looks like he did before.

"Good, so why don't you get out of here already?" He still doesn't look at me which makes it just more painful. He doesn't think that it's worth to look at me. And that's when my pride takes the control over me. I wipe away the tears that aren't just falling down because of Carly anymore. If I'm not even worth a stupid look than he isn't worth a single tear of mine. And then I rush out of the room slamming the door with all of my power, praying that it breaks and then and before I realize it, we're fighting the second time today. And this fight is just worse than the first one.

We said and did things just to hurt each other. It worked, at least, there's something that takes away my breath in a painful way and makes my heart beat so fast that I'm scared that it might breaks out of my body. Yeah, I am definitely hurt.

But that's what friends are for.

Freddie's POV

Why am I even following her?

I wonder as I take an umbrella and a jacket to leave my apartment. The answer is so clear and scary at the same time. The answer explains why I can't see her cry and every part of me wants to comfort her when she does, why I wanted to know how her lips taste, why I got lost in her eyes more than once, why I just can't stay mad at her and why it is so painful to watch her leave and why I'm following her even though thousands of ice cold raindrops are forcing me to close my eyes while I keep running through the dark.

I love her.

"I love Sam."

And just when I'm about to get all depressed because I know she doesn't feel the same way about me, someone puts his hand on my mouth.

I try to defend myself but the person behind me is too strong. My heart's pounding in my chest, faster and faster, I panic. All of the time I spent in gym seems to be wasted. There's nothing I can do about him.

Him.

There's no doubt that this is the person Carly was talking about.

That's the last thought I can finish before my head hits the ground and everything turns dark.

It's time for apologizing to you guys.

Your reviews were so positive and great and still it took me months to update.

Sorry. I didn't mean to. Actually I started this chapter just a week after I put up the first one. But somehow, I just hadn't enough time to finish it. So tonight, instead of sleeping, I wrote this chapter (5000 words by the way, longest chapter I've ever written. Wooh! xD) hoping that you'll forgive me. Please forgive me! Lol I'm being really dramatic right now. (Forgive me that too.)

I hope that you'll be still able to review… Otherwise, my whole work would've been senseless. *sighs*

So now I need to get another thing of my chest. iOMG… There's no need to explain why I totally freaked out and am a happy Seddier. xD

Bye! :D