Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach. Take plot, however, and I will hunt you down.
Author Note: As you can see, it's not a very long chapter, and I aplogize for that. It's also very, very angsty, with absolutely no humor. These might pop up every once in awhile. Finally, I'm not going to say whether this is from Karin's or Toshirou's point of view. That's up to you to decide.
Death is a Fact of Life
It was a melancholy day. I like to think the very earth grieves over the loss of someone as beautiful and talented as her. Heavy fog covered the ground in a blanket, the temperature chilly. But I didn't mind, I'd always enjoyed cool weather more then hot weather. When it's hot you're sweaty and irritable, but when it's cold a person can think clearly. Or at least, that's what it's like for me.
I stared at the tombstone in front of me, flowers held in a slack grip. It was a dull grey color, a simple and yet powerful symbol known by all of society. It didn't seem to fit her personality however; it was too regular, to much a common fact of life. Death hurts, it hurts so badly, and yet a person doesn't know had badly it hurts until they experience it themselves. And yet hundreds of people die of it each day; starvation, old age, cancer, neglect, suicide...
Why? Why, why, why?
A hot, unfamiliar warmth slid down my cheek, and I raised my hand to trace the foreign object. Holding it up to see, I gazed at the bead of water with wide eyes, unable to speak, unable to feel except for the mind numbing cold that pervaded my brain.
It wasn't fair. What had she done to deserve death? She was too good, to pure, it just... it wasn't fair.
Life's not fair. A voice whispered pensively in my mind, and I whimpered as a sharp pain filled my chest. Pain at being separated. Emptiness at the fact that someone I cared for, someone I loved with all my heart was gone. Never to see her laugh or smile. I grimaced and clutched my stomach, trying to hold back my internal pain as it spilled over me like an overflowing cup.
Letting out a low moan, I fell to my knees as sobs racked my body. My flowers fell to the floor, momentarily forgotten, as I let out animal like howls.
"ARGGHHH!" I screamed leaping to my feet and racing to the nearby tree, filled with an uncontrollable fury. Lunging forward, I struck the tree with one of my fists. It hurt, by I ignored the pain and continued to strike it. When my fists were bloody and raw, I started kicking the tree as hard as could. But it wasn't enough. Not nearly enough.
Grabbing some branches, I began to rip them off the tree before snapping it in half. I felt a maniac grin spread across my face, unaware of the blood dripping down my fists, or the terrible pain of a fracture in my right foot. Suddenly a hand grabbed me and spun me around.
"What do you think you're doing?" The deep baritone voice cried, and I recognized it as my father. He was the last person I wanted to see right then, in the midst of my grief.
"Leave me alone!" I screamed, tearing out of his grip and racing off, tears still streaming down my face, I'd been crying the whole time. I ran and ran and ran and ran until my legs couldn't take it anymore, and I collapsed. For a long time I stayed stock still, unable to muster up the energy to move.
I'm tired. I noted almost absently to myself, curling up into a ball and wiping my bloody hands across my face. It made me look like I'd gotten shot or something, but I could've cared less at the moment. A wave of lethargy hit me, and I closed my eyes before attempting to doze off, too tired to even raise my head.
But I found even this impossible, for despite my lethargy, my mind couldn't stop thinking about her. And as I thought about her, I came across a startling revelation. Death was apart of life. You lived, loved, and then you died. And the cycle repeated all over again. Nothing could or would stop the inevitable march of time. Death was simply a fact of life.
This comforted me, for no matter what, I'd eventually be reunited with her.
This thought gave me new energy, and I sat up. I attempted to clean up, but I was quite a mess. My weakness, the fact the fact that I had totally flipped out, embarrassed me. What had I been thinking? It was hard to remember, the time of my brief insane grief like a thick red cloud fog, obscured from view. Nonetheless, I resolved never to show weakness again. Never to cry in front of anyone, or even myself.
Never.
Sorry if it's not your cup of tea, I've been meaning to post this chapter up for quite awhile, and I figured now worked just as well as later. Thank you to all who reviewed the previous chapters and don't worry, the next chapter will resume its usual light hearted humor and hatred. Not to mention the introduction of one of my favorite charaters! (I think I said that last chapter, but, whatever) Anyway, ciao!
-Firefox