Eight: Thirst –Saziare il Desiderio Ardante-

I love her.

I know that this might sound too fast but considering the past week that has passed with only the two of us getting all the support we need from each other, I think that I've seen, felt and heard enough to establish this statement. I believe that the perfect way to know a person is to have him or her be shoved in the greatest predicament of your lives together

Sure, we don't get along fine. Expect a lot of bickering from the smallest things in life but despite that, there's this desire within me that yearns to hear her raised voice, to see her arched brows and fuming face and feel her cold treatment that, I will not deny, makes me happy to have met her; to have been able to be with her.

"Ryou," her voice swirled in my head like cotton candy, sweet and intoxicating. I looked at my right and she cocked her head. "You're spacing out. Something wrong?" she whispered. "Ah, I just thought of something." I answered back and stared at the mass of people all lined up by the sidewalks, waving and cheering to us. The parade started a little after seven thirty and right now, almost lunch time, we're nearing the end of the route.

When we reached the manor, our group went directly to the dining area where the long table was already set. We filled in the seats. I tried to sit away from her, since I didn't want to leave the commoner-getting-close-to-the-princess. Not that I thought of them that way but let's just say it's for formalities' sake. She glowered at me when I fell to the lower side of the table, sitting myself beside the active Phillip. Looks like I'm about to get a lecturing later, huh?

Fortunately for me, her time was jam-packed since the ball was coming in a few days. She had to undergo dancing lessons, basic German, proper table etiquette and a few notes about handling nobles. As for me, Phillip volunteered to keep me busy while everyone was doing the same, on a heavier note. He took me to the back garden, where a large open grassy area dominated and a few occasional tables and benches scooted to the sides. The grassy field reminded me of my sport. It has been almost a week since I last played it. Feeling nostalgic, I mentally shook the thought and followed the little devil in his running. It made me look like a babysitter but this was much better than leaving me alone in my room with nothing much interesting to do.

"Phillip, there you are." Darren's voice came from behind. He was walking to us, a sword hanging in his side. "Oh, thank you for looking after him." He said when Phillip came to me and took my hand. "No problem. It's better than doing nothing." I honestly replied. My eyes involuntarily traveled to the weapon on his side and he must have noticed it. "Can you take on one?" he asked, his brow rising a bit. I shook my head and tucked my hands in my pockets. "I don't do swords. I do soccer, though." I replied. "Ah, soccer it is! I haven't tried playing that one out, despite the popularity in here. I've been stuck with swords for most of my life." He chuckled and showed the golden handle. "Elizabeth Part Two gave this as a present." He said. "That's cool. It must be one of your treasures." I said and we walked back to the manor. "Yeah. Oh, anyway, looks like you wont get a little free time now. Nami's aski—ordering you to come inside and join her." He said and tried to imitate her face. Phillip and I joined a laugh. "Darren is such an actor." The young lad giggled and ran again. "Very active." I said as I followed him. "Uh, you said that Nami wanted me to join?" I asked, utterly confused and delighted.

"Yeah. She's on the hall. She's been looking for you since lunch time." He said and a smile crept on his face. I looked away and grunted. "I have the feeling that she's going to make me do something terrible." I said then rose. Darren laughed a hearty one, his head rolling back. "Now that is what I call bad omen." He said and continued to laugh.

And Darren was correct. I saw myself twitching with the recent development in my stay. Nami was in front of me, arms crossed and her eyes looking serious as she eyed me from head to toe. I shifted and moved my head away, which earned me a growl from the predator eyeing her prey. "Don't. Move." She hissed and turned my head back. "You haven't even explained things to me. Clearly, you've been acting without thinking again." I growled back at her. She set her lips to a thin line and turned back. "It's good." She said and the man who was at the side nodded before exiting. "Shall we begin?" she asked, the princess streak on her voice starting to get obvious. Hell, she was better off with not knowing about her regal status. Her bossy attitude meter just got to a higher level.

It appears that she sent me in the hall to get some dancing lessons with her. How dumb was I not to notice? I knew that the hall was the venue for the lessons but I failed to recognize the warning signs because the mere thought of Nami wanting to see me had set my gears recklessly on their own.

When I entered, I was instantly dragged by two male attendants and one guy, holding a tape measure, to a room at the back. There, one of the greatest horrors of my life came to materialize. I was asked to wear an old-style men's dress that seemed to pop out from medieval picture books. Breeches, stockings, a white long sleeve, then a vest, an overcoat, a cravat and a belt and a pair of boots and voila! I looked like some guy who time travelled.

"Let's start with the waltz." The instructor said and clapped his hands. Nami took me to the middle and positioned her arms. "Hey, your arms." She said when I just stood there. "Huh?" I asked. She rolled her eyes and did the job. "Waltz. I suppose you know how to do it?" she inquired. She was wearing the dress Aunt Veronika had shown to me yesterday, only in a different color. It was, the real dress, a tube gown, covering her all the way to her feet. It was a pale orange in color with slight yellow traces as it hits the light. It was simple but it showed amplified more of the lady in her. The one she was wearing was white, though.

With another clap, the music started and we began to fly across the room. Actually, it was she who was flying. I wasn't really fond of dancing but the way how she had led the pace, I felt like I was a pro. Occasionally, we'd step into each other's feet but that was okay. I can see that she was trying hard to perfect the routines and get a good impression. She had so much in her shoulders now that it almost felt like she hadn't really smiled for a while and seeing her blush with every stupid mistake that we did was very comforting.

"I'm quite surprised as to why you wanted me to do some dancing lessons with you." I whispered. She chuckled and eyed me slyly. I missed that a lot. "I thought that you're bored to death. You owe me one." She said with a wink. "Ah, how did you know that I was bored to death? Hmm?" I asked as we twirled. "Hah, have you forgotten who you're talking to? I just happened to be the nosiest journalist you've ever encountered." She proudly said with a little laugh. "So, does that mean you stalked me?" I asked. "Please, I do not stalk. I gather information." She said with that as-a-matter-of-fact look. "Really? How does that differ?" I teased her more.

"Stalking is for personal use. What I do is for the society." She said and we laughed together. I could never win a fight with her. When was the last time we had this light atmosphere between us?

A few days later, the ball came. Lots of cars and carriages (yes, horse carriages) were coming from who knows where that I began to think where they would park all those vehicles. The house staff continued to run here and there. The other family members were also busy with welcoming the guests and supervising the preparation. Nobles of different places, nationality and the sort came in. Mr. Lehrer advised me to stay put in my room for a while. According to him, I will be ushered in the hall with the rest of the family.

What?

"Mr. Tsuchiura?" Mr. Lehrer's voice sounded from behind the door. "Yeah?" I called out as I stopped pacing around. The knob twisted and in came his figure. "It's about time." He said and I nodded. Fixing the overcoat that I wore, I walked out and met gazes with Nami's father. He graced me a warm smile and nodded at my appearance. "It suits you very well." He said and I smiled shyly. "T-Thank you, sir." I responded and he motioned for me to walk with him. Mr. Lehrer bowed and hurried to get the others as well. "It is an honor to be able to be a part of today." I said when we started to walk down the hall. He grunted and slightly swayed his head. "Don't be too formal with me, young man. I'd rather have casual talks with people who don't mind my status." He said and wrinkled his nose, a gesture that reminded me of her. He looked at me and a smile emerged. "How long have you been friends with Nami? I see you two are fairly close." He said and he veered to the left.

"I only met her earlier this year, actually. If it wasn't for the concours then…"

"Concours?" he asked in an amused tone. "Uh, yeah. I am a concour participant in our school. She happens to be the school journalist who does the recaps and news about it." I explained quickly, not spilling anything like how his daughter would sneak around the campus looking for her targets and getting to fights because of privacy issues. "Then you must show us a little of your ability! We'd love to hear from you." He said.

We stopped, finally, at a door that the two of us knew well. I stepped back and allowed him to knock on it. "It's open." Her voice called from inside. The Duke opened it and he waved at me to come in as well. Though hesitant, it was the Duke's orders so…

She stood there, with her back on us. "Fath—oh," she said when I came in, a heartbeat after she saw her father. A couldn't miss that glow in her eyes. I allowed a small nod and smile at her before falling behind.

"You look wonderful, Nami." Her father said as they joined in a hug. "I'm sort of nervous." She giggled and her father patted her shoulder. "You'll do fine. You worked hard for this." He responded and tucked a little hair behind her ear. A shadow crept on her face. "It's not that, father. It's about…the truth that we are going to lie to them about my real identity." She muttered and looked down. The Duke lifted her head up and smiled. "I'm sorry. I…" his hand fell but the sad smile was still there on his face. "When you walk out this room, you will now be Fiona. You are not Nami anymore." He said and hugged her one more time before leaving.

"F-Father…" she called before the door closed. "I'm not mad at you or anything. It's not just sinking in that much yet." She said when her father didn't respond but kept his stand. "I love you, father." She whispered. "I love you too, Nami." He said then left.

She breathed deep and when she exhaled, she forced out a smile. The image she casted brought back a statement that pierced my heart.

When you walk out this room, you will now be Fiona. You are not Nami anymore

"I guess it's time to go." She whispered and sucked in a breath as she walked to the door, which was just beside me. "This is it." She said, making it sound like she was excited but the slight trembling in her voice failed her.

Before she was able to turn the knob, I stopped her hand and did what I have been keeping myself from doing.

I heard her soft gasp. "R-Ryou!" she said as her body froze.

I embraced her. My heart pounded so hard on my chest that it felt like it was going to jump out my body anytime soon. I buried my face on her right shoulder, fighting hard the tears which were impending to flow. I held like it was going to be the last time in my whole life that I will be able to do it. At that moment, I finally realized the phrase that regret comes at the end. Why? Why only now? Why haven't I listened to the signs before? It was all there, the little flip in my stomach whenever she would glance my way; the warm feeling whenever she would look me in the eyes and all I could see were pure joy. She was the new sun of my life, the new source of joy and inspiration and strength. But why? Why must she be taken away from me like this?

Why?

"Ryou! What's wrong?" she asked as she tried to break away from me but I resisted. I hugged her a little bit tighter, my arms coiling around her frame. I could not speak, I could not even utter sound, afraid that I might break down if I do so. Right now, she was the only thing that mattered to me. She was all that I've got and I couldn't do anything more than this to stop her.

Like it would do anything.

"Nami," I started as I breathed deep, breathing her within me as well. "There's something that I want to tell you. Badly wanted to tell you." I said. I felt her heartbeat rattled faster. "R-Ryo—"

"Please, let me speak first. I may not have any other chance so please…"

"O-Okay." There was a lump in her voice. "I…"

I bit my lip as I felt the tears ready to flow in one more blink so I closed my eyes. "I never knew why something seems to be pulling me to you. I didn't pay attention to all the signs. I…" I felt my voice breaking. I have no more time…

"I like you. I want you. I love you." I said and allowed a tear or two to fall from my eyes. I felt her froze when I uttered those words to her. I understand her. I didn't mean to tell it to her in this way but…

I was becoming very desperate. I was being threatened. I was going to be stripped off of things that I have held dear. They were going to take her away from me.

"Don't go." I whispered as the crack in my voice appeared again. She didn't answer…

I was getting a little uncomfortable with her silence. I wanted to know what was going in her mind right now. I want her to shout at me, push me away and start reprimanding me for this foolishness.

Yes, foolishness. I was foolishly in love with her. And I couldn't do anything to stop the feeling. It even grows as the time passes by. I was becoming selfish, indifferent and possessive-traits that I didn't knew I would have.

"I have to…" she whispered back. No, please…say anything but that. I beg you…

"Please, I beg you. Don't go." And my body tensed. She might have felt it too because she jumped slightly.

A soft knock came from the outside. "Milady, it's time." Mr. Lehrer's voice was soft…

Then it came. She responded with my act and she started to lift her arms to hug me back. Oh, how my heart danced. I wanted to jump and break free and see her smiling face when she uttered something that almost crushed me inside.

"I beg you too, let me go." She said and pushed herself away and quickly left me.