Mistaken Identity

Prompt: Doctor Who/Phoenix Wright or Life on Mars story? Would be even better with Master/Doctor!
I've done Life On Mars, sorry if anything is OOC, I've never seen the programme... I've tried my best xD
/Basically, when text is written within slashes, it means that either the Doctor or the Master is talking to the other inside their heads, due to a psychic connection/
For FightingDreamer Alchemist

/Where are going?/ the Master whined. He was reclining on a beanbag at the edge of the control room. The Doctor wondered where he had got it from, but he didn't ask because he guessed that it had been stolen from one of the TARDIS's rooms.
/Back in time. On Earth!/ he said instead, grinning excitedly at the Master.
/That's boring/ moaned the Master. /I'm not one of your silly humans, I'm a Time Lord!/
/But this is a great period of history!/
/So where are we going then? A bloody roman battle? A vulgar Elizabethan play? Some other completely ridiculous piece of human history?/
/1973!/
/?/ The Doctor bounced around the controls.
/1973!/ he exclaimed louder.
/Nope. Nothing/ The Doctor slid down until he was sat on the floor, his back leaning against the controls.
/1973!/ he tried desperately.
/Repeating it isn't going to help. I don't know anything about Earth history/
/Space exploration!/ exclaimed the Doctor. /This tiny, primitive race of people have finally ventured away from their home planet/
/So?/
/Computers. The microwave oven!/
/What's a microwave oven? Sounds painful/
/It's this incredible little invention that cooks your food from the inside out. It's absolute genius, uses microwaves... Which is where it got its name, coincidentally/
/Right. Sounds... useful/
/Oh, and the music!/ This thought excited the Doctor so much that he felt he had to say it out loud.
"The music!" His voice echoed around the silent TARDIS. "Listen to this!"
/Shhh/ said the Master. /You're making my ears hurt/ The Doctor ignored him and stood up. He pulled a few odd looking levers and pressed a couple of luminous buttons.
"You are the dancing queen! Young and sweet! Only seventeen!" blared the speakers.
"Turn it off!" shrieked the Master. The Doctor sighed and cut the music.
"I know it's not their best song, but it really isn't that bad."
"What the hell was it?"
"ABBA."
/ABBA/ the Master repeated in the Doctor's head. /So you're taking me here because humans have reached their tiny moon, they have started cooking their food from the inside out and they listen to ABBA/
/And Fleetwood Mac, Elton John, Jimi Hendrix... It's a music revolution!/
/You're still not selling it/
/There were some brilliant films released. I remember watching Jaws 2, scared the pants off me/
/Now that would be a sight worth seeing/ commented the Master dryly.
/Sideburns were in fashion!/ the Doctor cried with desperation.
/You wish/ said the Master, smirking.
/Come on! It'll be fun. I'll show you-/
/I don't want to be shown anything/
/Spoilsport/

OoO

The TARDIS materialised loudly in the corner of the room, but the man sat on the chair didn't notice. He didn't see either, because he was facing the other way.

OoO

/We're here/ said the Doctor cheerfully.
/Does it always make that dreadful racket?/
/I like it/
/You would/ The Master stood up. /Come on then. The sooner we go, the sooner we get back/
/Put the beanbag back where you found it/ said the Doctor.
/No, I might want it later/ The Master opened the blue door. The Doctor followed him, realising that, once again, the Master was in control.
"My name is Sam Tyler," he heard the man say. He looked vaguely familiar although the Doctor could only see him from behind. The Master looked at the Doctor.
/Who is he?/ he asked.
/I don't know/ replied the Doctor.
/Elton John? Jimi Hendrix?/ asked the Master sarcastically.
/No/ said the Doctor, wishing that it was. He had Elton John's, but Jimi Hendrix's autograph was one that he had never got round to adding to his collection.
"I had an accident and woke up in 1973," said the man. He was still facing away from the two Time Lords.
/Do you think he's an actor?/ asked the Master.
/Rehearsing?/
/Yeah. Sounds like it's some sort of science fiction thing/
"Am I mad, in a coma or back in time?"
/Or all three!/ said the Doctor.
/Shush/
/Why?/ The Doctor pouted, but the Master wasn't looking at him.
/Because I'm listening. And I won't fall for your puppy dog face/
/You're not even looking at me!/
/I can just tell/
/Wasn't doing it anyway/ lied the Doctor.
/Sure/
"Whatever's happened, it's like I've landed on a different planet."
/Ooh, aliens/ said the Doctor.
/Don't you listen?/ snapped the Master. /It's like he's landed on a different planet/ It was the Doctor's turn to say shush now.
"Now, maybe if I can work out the reason, I can go home." The man stood up and turned around. "Who the hell are you?"
"I think the question is, who are you?" replied the Doctor.
"You're another hallucination, aren't you? This isn't real, it can't be." He was looking at the Master as he said this.
/He's creeping me out/ said the Master. /Can we go somewhere else?/
/No. I want to know who he is/
"Who are you?" asked the man. This time it was definitely directed at the Doctor.
"I'm the Doctor," he said, holding out his hand. The man shook it.
"Sam Tyler," he said. The Doctor noticed that Sam was pointedly not looking at the Master. He wondered why.
"I'm-" began the Master, but Sam cut him off.
"I know who you are. Stop talking to me."
/Oh, someone doesn't like you/ said the Doctor. /When did you piss this guy off?/
/I've never seen the man in my life!/ exclaimed the Master.

OoO

The Doctor and the Master followed Sam outside. It was raining.
"So what are you doing round here?" Sam asked the Doctor.
"oh, I'm just out and about, you know..."
"Oh?"
"I travel. I've been to a lot of places."
/You don't say/ said the Master.
/Shush/ replied the Doctor.
"I bet you haven't been as far as me," said Sam, sadly.
"As far as you?"
"It doesn't matter."
/Why doesn't he talk to me?/ whined the Master. /Make him talk to me/
/Stop acting like a two year old and ask him yourself/ The Mast glared at the Doctor.
"Tyler, why are you ignoring me?" the Master asked. The Doctor laughed: the Master sounded like an annoyed school boy. Sam finally turned to look at him.
"You're a hallucination." This made the Doctor laugh louder.
"I wish," he said. "He wouldn't annoy me so much if he was a figment of your imagination."
"But he's me."
"Hey! I'm still here!" yelled the Master, but both of them ignored him.
"He's you..." The Doctor clicked his fingers excitedly. "Of course! That's who you reminded me of!" Both Sam and the Master looked at him, confused. "Sam, you look like the Master. Master, you look like Sam!" The Doctor was beside himself with excitement. "Oh, this is brilliant!"
"Don't mind him," the Master said to Sam. "He's crazy."
"So you're not a hallucination?"
"No," said the Master. "I'm a Time Lord."
"So, you see, you look exactly like each- what did you just say?" said the Doctor.
"What's a Time Lord?" asked Sam.
"I travel through time in a TARDIS. It's inside, want to see?"
"Hey! That's my TARDIS!" The Doctor chased after the Master and Sam who had gone back inside. He didn't like this new, friendly Master.

OoO

"But it's bigger on the inside!" Sam Tyler gazed around the interior of the TARDIS with an awestruck expression.
/How did you get in?/ the Doctor asked the Master furiously.
/I got your key/ said the Master smugly. /You left in the door/
/Damn/
"It's Time Lord technology," the Master told Sam. "It can take you anywhere you want to go, and anywhere in time."
"Seriously?" asked Sam.
/What do you plan to get out of this, Master?/ snapped the Doctor. Both the facts that the Master had his key and that all three of them were dripping rainwater onto his clean floor were annoying him.
/Control of the TARDIS/ replied the Master. The Doctor laughed coldly and Sam looked at him oddly.
/It won't work/ said the Doctor.
/It will. I will return Tyler home, time will break and you will beg me to sort things out/
/I'll never beg for anything from you, Master. And you've forgotten that only I can control the TARDIS/
"You can travel through time?" asked Sam.
"Yes," said both the Doctor and the Master at once.
"I'm not supposed to be here in 1973," said Sam. "Can you take me home?"
"Yes," said the Master.
"No," said the Doctor.
/Why not?/ asked the Master. /Don't you want to help him? That's what you do, isn't it? You always help people/ The Doctor ignored him.
"I'm sorry," he said. "I'm so sorry."
"You're just going to leave me here?"
"You'll find your way back. You have to do it by yourself."
/Bastard/ said the Master. /I'll think of another way to cause chaos/ The Doctor didn't reply.

OoO

Sam stood outside the TARDIS. He watched as the 1950s style police box disappeared from view with a loud, grating sound. He was stood in the 1970s, a visitor from the future, gazing at something from an even earlier past.
"I'll have to find my own way back," he said to himself, thinking bitterly of the Doctor who had left him behind.

AN: So... there it is, my first attempt at Life On Mars... Without having seen it. *Holds head in hands* Please don't hate me if you don't like it. :p