A/N: HELLO WORLD! This is the 2nd to last chapter! *sobs* :( But! I have other funny stories you can read to so please check them out! I'll miss writing this but at least I won't have to worry about updates, that's why I like oneshots :) Please enjoy the Alois chapter!

Disclaimer: I don't own Kuroshitsuji, Wikipedia, Fanfiction, or Deviantart :)

NOTE: I updated these chapters to fix grammar errors

Alois Trancy

"Aaahaahaa!" Alois laughed. He was rolling around in a field of flowers, laughing like and insane child. In a second, the field turned into a vast ocean. "I'm going to drown!" he cried. Alois tried to break to the surface, but the water just kept pulling him down. He screamed.

And then he woke up. Alois blinked his eyes, recognizing the pink wall around him. "A dream! YAY! Fun dream!" he exclaimed. Alois had lots of dreams, many of which he woke up before he died or committed suicide. He enjoyed every one of them. Many thought the kid was bipolar or just insane. Whenever someone asked him if he had ADD or ADHD or any kind of mental disorder, he'd break down in tears and yell at the person and accuse them of being racist, which made no sense at all. Usually, the person just ran away in fear of the screaming child and Alois would fall on the ground and laugh. Kinda scary.

"Donna-sama," said the voice of Alois's butler, Claude. This put a smile on the boy's face.

"Claude-o!" he squealed. Claude changed Alois into his regular day attire. Alois loved to be pampered, he was like a puppy. When that was done, they went down for breakfast.

"Feed me Claude!" demanded Alois.

"Yes, your Highness." Claude fed Alois his meal. Alois thought it was so much fun to bite the fork so his butler couldn't pull it out. Of course, Claude had no reaction, which ticked Alois off. 'Claude you're so boring!' he thought, 'Why don't you want to have any fun?' Alois's idea of fun was different from others. A normal 14-year old boy would find play sports and hanging out with friends fun, but Alois's idea of fun as torturing, manipulating, and scandalizing other people.

After he was fed, Hannah and the triplets came in to clean up. Hannah was coming over to get his plate and utensils.

"Let me get that for you, Donna-sama," she said.

Alois glared at her. He really hated Hannah. Alois smiled evilly. He took the dish and threw it at her face.

"GET OUT OF HERE YOU DIRTY HOE!" he yelled. At that, Hannah left with her face bleeding and full of glass bits. "Ahahahahahahahahaha!" Alois laughed hysterically. He noticed Claude just standing there. "Claude. Laugh."

"Hehe," he laughed sarcastically

"Now you're getting it!~" he squealed, obvious not getting it. "HUGS!" he opened his arms wide.

"Do I have to?"

"Yes!" Claude reluctantly hugged Alois.

"Ok, you need to start working now. There's many documents for you to fill out in our office so you might wanna get started," said Claude.

"Haaaaaii!" cheered Alois as he skipped to his office. He got there and sat down at his desk on his special swivel chair. He started spinning around insanely fast.

"WEEEEEEEE!" he screamed. Then he stopped because he was getting dizzy. "Oh cra-ah!" he threw up. "Oh not again!" Alois complained. "Ahh, Claude can clean it up later." He slid back over to the desk. He decided to go over to his computer. Even though it was the 1800s, he had ordered Claude to go to the future and get him something special. This was what he got.

"Let's check my email!" he said. He clicked on the 'sign in' button. It the read '0 New Messages'. Big shock there. "Why doesn't anyone talk to me!" cried Alois. After getting over that issue, he did what he always did on his special toy: Look up info and pictures of Ciel Phantomhive. Because he wanted him, wink, wink. So he went to Wikipedia and read all the Ciel articles, even though he'd already read them about 8375843829447373 times. He sat there for about an hour squealing at all the articles.

"Let's look up Ciel fan art!" Alois cheered. He went to Deviantart and looked up Ciel pictures. "Awwwww," he squealed, "Cielly is just so adorable! As Alois was going through pictures, Claude came into the room to serve him his tea.

"Donna-sama! Stop looking at Ciel pictures!" he said.

"Why?"

"Because that's my job!"

O_o

"Hurry up and give me my tea! Oh yea, and I puked again," said Alois.

"Of course you did," mumbled Claude as he got down to clean the floor.

Next, Alois looked up fanfiction stories about Ciel and him.

"So me and Ciel lived happily ever after! The end!" Alois squealed, "I seriously wonder how these people know me."

"Wonderful," said Claude after he'd finished cleaning the barf off the floor. "Now Donna-sama, I need to go to the market and get some stuff."

"OOOOO! Can I come too?"

"Um, why?" he asked.

"I'll be bored!" he complained.

"And I'll be dead by the end of this trip."

"What?"

"Nothing!" Claude said quickly, "Fine you can come, but don't embarrass me!"'

"Right back at ya buddy!" Alois winked. So Claude and Alois headed off to the market, which was outdoors. Claude went to get Alois out of the carriage.

"Carry me Claude-o!" demanded Alois. Claude picked up Alois and carried him like a child.

"So what are we getting?" asked Alois.

"We're getting tea."

"YAY! TEA!" cheered Alois. He looked around at the variety of people. 'HA!' he thought. 'They're all so ugly! They should all die! Just DIE!'

"Donna-sama, why are you grinning like that?" his butler asked. Alois just kept on starting into the distance. "Well this can't be good," he mumbled as he continued to walk on. When they got to the shop where they sold tea, Alois finally spoke.

"Hey Claude, why are we getting tea at a pheasant shop?" asked Alois.

"Because you like their tea," he replied.

"But they're pheasants! Old people! Not worthy of my money!" complained Alois.

"Donna-sama, we've been through this before, not everyone is as rich as you. And you told me you loved the tea I got here so we're gonna buy it."

"Fine," Alois said. He made Claude put him down so he could walk around the shop. He went to the back room where there was more tea stored. He decided to grab some tea packs and shoved them in his pockets. 'Hehehehe I love shoplifting!' Alois laughed evilly in his mind.

"Time to leave, Donna-sama," Claude called from the back of the store.

"Ok!" Alois called back. He skipped to the front of the store to Claude and they headed out. Claude expected Alois to follow him, but for a twist, Alois just stopped walking, but Claude continued on, not knowing he was leaving Alois behind.

Alois giggled and ran to a nearby alley.

"I could have tons of fun here!" he said to himself. Then he heard a rustling noise over near a garbage bin. "It's a hobo!" cheered Alois. "I've never met a hobo before!" he ran over to the person. "HI STRANGER! How's life as a hobo?"

"Hobo?" he replied, "I'm not a hobo! I'm the Undertaker!

"Really?" said Alois surprised, "Then ya might wanna consider a haircut, dude. What are you doing out here anyway?"

"Looking for dead stuff."

"Have fun with that!~" Alois skipped away leaving the Undertaker, slightly offended from being called a hobo.

Alois continued skipping until he reached the end of the alley way. He was feeling extraordinarily evil so he took garbage bad and put it over his head and ran out to a nearby shop.

He ran inside and yelled: "Gimme yo money!" like a mugger.

The girl at the counter screamed and ran into the back room while all the customers panicked. Alois quickly raided the cash register and ran out the door, laughing like an insane maniac.

"Well," he said to himself as he ran back to him mansion, "Today wasn't bad. I stole some tea, met a hobo, and robbed a shop! YAAAY!" Alois soon made it back to the Trancy estate.

"Donna-sama! Where have you been?" said a frantic Claude the second he walked in.

"Awwww you were worried about me?" cooed Alois.

T_T

"Anyway, guess what I got!" Alois showed him all the tea and money he had stolen and told him the story.

"What?" Claude exclaimed, "Why didn't you tell me? I could've gotten even more money!"

"Nu uh Claude! Well I'm going to bed, nighty night, Claude-o!" said Alois. "Oh yeah, did you ever clean that barf up?"

O_o "Crap! Claude ran to the office. Alois giggled and ran to his room and fell asleep in minutes. He dreamt he jumped off a cliff and committed suicide. Again. But of course, he woke up before he died. =)

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