Chapter 2

Hey! Did you miss me? Okay, I wasn't gone THAT long –just for a day, so…yeah…ANYWAYS, I'm probably planning to do lots of sasusaku, nejiten, inoshikatema, and naruhina in this fic so all you fans out there can hug me right now –I'm feeling nice….it's a miracle, isn't it?

Anyways, I really don't know what's going to happen this chapter since I don't really plan these things out, but since I got 11 reviews (YAY! Hugs all my lovely cool super awesome reviewers), this chapter is going to be 11 pages, as promised, okay?

Now, ON WITH THE FIC!

Disclaimer: If I owned Naruto, there'd be more fluff –that and Orochimaru wouldn't wear so much eyeliner –it's a little scary once you think about it since he was so CUTE when he was little! Anyways, I don't own it, which is why Sasuke started losing his fashion sense –I mean, what is up with him and one pieces and bows and kimonos and stuff? XP

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It was finally morning and Jiraiya had come up with a plan, which was why he was busy making birthday invitations….er, perverted birthday invitations…let's just say that if the boys don't die of blood loss from nosebleeds, then this fanfic won't end soon. Luckily Tsunade had agreed to help before she got drunk last night so Jiraiya wasn't the one in a pink apron baking a cake.

"JIRAIYA!"

Jiraiya had forgotten how loud Tsunade could yell.

"Where the heck is the FROSTING!"

Jiraiya flinched. I mean, it wasn't everyday you had THE hokage cook in YOUR kitchen. Mind you, even the kitchen is taped up with posters from Icha Icha Paradise, and Jiraiya was happy that Tsunade wasn't paying them any attention.

"Er…"

"NEVER MIND! I FOUND IT!"

Jiraiya sighed in relief. He did NOT want Tsunade coming after him in the mornings because he had a MAJOR hangover.

How does she do it? I mean, I feel disgusting right now –even worse than when I watched Naruto play strip poker…god I do NOT want to ever remember that….my virgin eyes were scarred that time…

"JIRAIYA! I'M DONE! YOU BETTER HAVE FINISHED THOSE INVITATIONS!"

Jiraiya winced. He really did have a bad hangover.

"Yes..yes…now can you get Naruto and the others here? Seriously, I've been waiting all night for this.."

That part was true –Jiraiya really did have black circles under his eyes as he filled out the last invitation.

"Okay, first we have to deliver the invitations, then we'll wait for them to arrive," Tsunade had somehow planned all of this out while baking a cake from scratch.

Jiraiya's brain started overheating.

"Jiraiya…stop thinking…."

Jiraiya thankfully listened to Tsunade.

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All of the ninjas gathered around Tsunade and Jiraiya, with their invitations. Apparently, they had all received them and were waiting. Some, like Chouji and Naruto came for the "free food", and others, like Neji, Gaara, Lee, Sasuke, and Shino came for the "free training and killing techniques" as the invitation had indicated. Others, like Tenten, Sakura, Ino, and Hinata came since their guys were there. ….And well, Shikamaru came because the invitation said there would be back rubs. Kiba…was just…there…..at the beginning…..and Sai, well, let's just say he came with "dickless wonder".

ANYWAYS, Tsunade started talking.

"Before you start learning and eating and sleeping or whatever, I am assigning you a mission."

Everybody groaned.

"Hn…"

"…so ….troublesome…"

"is there ramen involved?"

"munch….munch"

"ruff!"

"argh…"

"cha!"

"e…e…er…."

"figures…"

Tsunade continued, ignoring the protests, "Your mission is to eat this cake." Tsunade pointed to her homemade cake.

Eyebrows started twitching.

"THAT'S A MISSION?"

Tsunade sighed. She didn't have any other ideas of slipping in her potion to the ninjas. "Just do it. At least you'll succeed in this mission." She glared at Naruto. He gulped.

The ninjas sighed.

"Ok…I'll take a small slice…"

"I'll have one…"

"Hn…."

"…."

"…."

"bow wow….XD"

"YOSH! Cake is youthfulness!"

"s..s…sure…."

"troublesome…."

Eventually, all the ninjas started eating some of the cake.

After about 5 minutes of chewing, they started choking.

"The frosting is toothpaste!"

"What are you trying to do, Tsunade? Poison us?

Tsunade's eyes started twitching….

"Jiraiya…why did you have toothpaste where the frosting was supposed to be?"

Jiraiya started running out of the room, and was chased by Tsunade.

Luckily, they had remembered to place a video camera in the room to spy on them just as the ninjas began to pass out and faint. (yes people, THE Uchiha Sasuke fainted too…same with THE Hyuuga Neji, too….I guess their hotness doesn't protect them from Tsunade's potion…XD)

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Sakura woke up first. With her Inner released.

"YES! SASUKE'S ASLEEP! THIS IS THE PERFECT OPPORTUNITY TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF HIM!" Sakura started creeping towards Sasuke, who was stirring. She bent down and was about to kiss him when he sat up suddenly. Their heads crashed into each other and they mouths met.

And they pulled back.

Sasuke started turning red while Sakura started screaming outloud in victory.

"HA! INO I KISSED SASUKE! HA! SHANNARO! GO ME! YAHOO!"

She started leaping around the room. It seems as if Inner Sakura doesn't need caffiene to get high. Poor Sakura. She's somewhere in the back of her mind, cursing herself for fainting and cheering for kissing Sasuke but she's embarrassed that she's jumping up and down. ANYWAYS…

Ino was awake, and pretty much everyone else was up by this time while Jiraiya and Tsunade were watching what was going on from the video camera and laughing.

Ino pouted.

"HMPH! HEY, AT LEAST I DON'T LIKE HIM ANYMORE! I MEAN, SERIOUSLY, HE LOOKS LIKE A CHICKEN WHEN HE WAKES UP!" Ino screamed. It seems as if her Inner doesn't like Sasuke at all…XD

Ino and Sakura started fighting each other while the others looked on. After about 5 minutes, Sasuke was getting tired watching them fight and started twitching furiously. His Inner started taking over.

"SAKURA! MY CHERRY BLOSSOM! DO NOT GET HURT!" Sasuke started screaming. "YOU ARE MY YOUTHFULNESS!"

Sakura and Ino stopped and stared at Sasuke.

"Sasuke…you're starting to sound like Lee…"

"HN…."

"That's better…"

(who knew? It seems as if Sasuke's Inner had major moodswings…)

Ino, watching all of this take place started curling up in a corner, where Shikamaru was trying to go back to sleep again….

"Ino…"

"Yes….Shika-kun…"

"What did you just call me?"

"umm…Shike-kun…"

"this is so troublesome…"

"SHIKA!"

Ino started hugging Shikamaru, who was having trouble breathing.

"Ino…I guess you're over Sasuke now, right?"

"YEAH! I WAS NEVER INTO THAT DUCK FACE!"

Shikamaru started smiling. And then stopped. Why was he smiling? It was too troublesome to smile..

Meanwhile, Neji was busy …er….how do I say this?….sucking Tenten's toe. (don't ask…)

"Neji?"

suck, suck…

"Why are you sucking my toe?"

suck, suck….
"You know, you look cute with your hair like this…can I play with it?" Tenten had no idea what she was saying so she tried covering her mouth. Unfortunately, her Inner took over.

Tenten began braiding Neji's hair as he sucked her toe.

"Tenten…"

"Yes…"

"You have….pretty toes…"

Tenten blushed.

"Was that….just a compliment?"

Neji continued sucking her toe.

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Naruto, however, somehow stayed the same, if not a little bit weirder…He was, surprisingly, hugging Hinata, though.

"hinata…"

"…"

Hinata was struggling to breathe, but she wasn't fainting…

"Naruto…"

"yes?"

Naruto loosened his grip on Hinata.

"I DIDN'T FUCKIN' FAINT! YAR!"

Hinata started cussing out loud and jumping in the air with Naruto.

"HINATA! YOU'RE AWESOME"

"I FUCKING KNOW I AM! HELL YEAH!"

And with that, Naruto and Hinata started making out….

The rest of the ninjas stared at them…either in admiration or horror, I really don't know…

Sasuke and Sakura looked at each other.

"Maybe we should try that…" Sasuke suggested. "I mean, you are the incarnate of YOUTHFULNESS!"

Lee, however was screaming at Sasuke for stealing his punch line, but let's ignore him right now…

Sakura nodded, "I KNEW YOU LIKED ME! HA!"

Sasuke suddenly looked down…um….Sakura's…shirt….and turned red.

"Sasuke…"

"…."

"What are you doing?"

"…"

Sasuke's nose started bleeding as Sakura bent down and leaned closer. He couldn't take it anymore and started singing out loud.

My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard,
And they're like
It's better than yours,
Damn right it's better than yours,
I can teach you,
But I have to charge

I know you want it,
The thing that makes me,
What the guys go crazy for.
They lose their minds,
The way I wind,
I think its time

Everybody turned to the singing Sasuke.

Cricket.

Cricket.

Chirp. (in this fic, Sakura has NOTHING against birds…if you don't know what I'm talking about, then read my other fic, "Cleared" )

Silence.

Then Ino started bellydancing in front of Shikamaru, who was suffering from a major nosebleed.

Neji finally stopped sucking Tenten's toes and was sucking another part of her anatomy entirely….let's just not mention that part since I'm afraid the rating might go up..XD…Tenten, though, was enjoying it because it was…. started dancing with Hinata who was singing along with Sasuke. Soon, everyone was grinding in the small office –even Gaara, who was strip-teasing on the desk.

However, not everyone was happy.

Lee's Inner was decidedly a goth (no offense to any goths, I happen to have some friends that are goths too –I basically just made Lee a goth since it's so against his usual personality) , so Lee was somehow talking to Akamaru about the darkness of life.

Chouji was thinking of going on a diet.

Kiba was….well….marking his territory on Tsunade's chair.

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(in a cabin in the middle of the forest)

Jiraiya started giggling as he and Tsunade watched what the ninjas were doing.

Tsunade, however, was busy on the phone calling Gai, Kakashi, Asuma, and Kurenai to tell them to come over.

"Yes, Kakashi, it's a sneak peek of the next Icha Icha Paradise edition."

Tsunade finally finished calling everyone and started making popcorn.

She went into the living room and started watching Gaara strip tease on her desk as Kiba was peeing on her desk.

Cricket.

Cricket.

Tsunade burst out laughing as Jiraiya started taking notes for his future bestseller. The doorbell suddenly rang as Kakashi and the others streamed in.

They took one look at the tv and started having nosebleeds.

Well, all except Gai who was screaming about youthfulness.

"Tsunade…" Kakashi started twitching.

"Yes…"

"What did you do to my team?"

"And my team?"

"And what about mine?"

"I just…intesified their personalities…" Tsunade's eyes were glued onto the screen as Gaara started taking off his pants.

Kurenai started blushing as Kakashi and Asuma sweatdropped.

However, the situation changed when they saw Sasuke belting out "Milkshake".

Cricket.

Cricket.

Kakashi spit out his mouthful of popcorn while Asuma choked on his cigarette.

Tsuanade, on the other hand, started laughing hysterically.

Kakashi managed to choke out, "Tsunade. If you managed to get Sasuke to do that, then you are my hero…"

Tsunade nodded as she turned back to the tv. There, on the screen, was a close-up of Neji on top of Tenten, sucking on parts of her female anatomy while she braided his hair.

The camera swiveled around, showing Shino with hairspray, trying to tame down his 'fro.

Kakashi suddenly had an idea.

"Why don't we put this on primetime?"

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So how'd you like it? It took me forever –basically because I was reading fanfics while typing this, but I still worked hard on this. Oh, and this is actually turning out harder than I thought. Oh well….Anyways, I NEED YOUR IDEAS! So REVIEW, and give me COMMENTS, QUESTIONS, CRITICISM, or the MUCH NEEDED IDEAS! (thank you, thank you) Until next time,

Ja ne!