I sigh as I ask myself what I'm about to do. Sav and I have shared a love so strong, I don't know if I should do this.
"Wait. What's the point in this?" I ask Bianca.
"Oh, I knew it. The old Anya never left. You're still the same good person everyone knew and loved." Bianca glared at Anya with a look of disappointment.
"No! I'm still with it! I just need some motivation, is all."
"Well, he's the one who broke up with you right? After like three years of love and caring. All you gave to him and he just threw it all down the trash. He wasn't even willing to tell his parents about you."
She was good. She knew how to get down deep and really shove something down your throat. I could tell she was having just a little too much fun with this.
"Lets go." I started to walk with the force of the demonic rage piling up inside of me. The minute I turned the corner, my heart stopped. Not because I saw Sav, but because he was standing by his locker, sharing a nice laugh with Holly J. My eyes started welling up with tears. As much as I wanted to be pissed, I just couldn't do it. I turned and bolted for the bathroom.
I couldn't believe it. My heart was breaking all over again. Suddenly, a montage of our love started playing through my head. When he shared his sticker book with me, when he helps me with the Freedom Fast, and the time I was sick and he stayed with me and watched soaps. All the memories only made me cry more.
"Hey, are you okay?" a voice I don't recognize calls out. I can't even answer, so I just exit the stall and look at my mystery guest. It's Clare Edwards. All I can do is lean my head on her shoulder and sniffle.
"I don't see why you're getting so worked up. So they were laughing together. When you and Sav were going out, if he laughed with another girl did you freak out and claim a stall?" she says to me, trying to calm me down.
"You don't understand. He was giving her the look that he used to give me. The one that said 'I'm interested in you, keep talking.'" I said.
"You're just letting out all the feelings. I know what it's like. You feel a certain way for so long but don't say anything because you don't want to burden anyone else, then weeks later; you let it all out in one big emotional rush. But as soon as this is over, we'll go to The Dot and it will all be better. I promise." She assured me. I somehow managed to smile through my tears.
"Pinky swears?" I giggled. We locked pinkies, and then kissed our thumbs. I know that Sav and I are over, but I want, no, NEED him back in my life. It's torture just having him as a friend without feeling his strong hands locked in mine, his sparkly brown eyes looking deep into my soul. I want to feel us skin to skin, but will it ever happen?