WELL THAT ONLY TOOK FOREVER. Sorry. Meatspace obligations have been eating our lives, and then Eggy took, like, days to send this back to me, and gah. Plus, Hetalia Fluffathon's got me busy, so if I promised you fic for anything else, you'll probably get it sometime after September 15.

We still don't own Hetalia, and we're still very, very sorry for America's bad spelling.

England
I timed it, and Spain has been talking about flowers for FIFTY SIX MINUTES. And now it's MORE because of the time it took me to write that. WHO. CARES. ABOUT. FLOWERS.
America

Dear America,
I am not talking to you. Piss off.
Sincerely, England

Aw Artie, don't be like that.
Love America

Dear America,
You don't be like that. Be like someone who pays attention for once in his life.
Sincerely, England

America-
Listen to England.
England-
Don't engage him. You'll only encourage him.
-Germany

England and Germany
You're not the boss of me! And I am paying attention, just not to Spain and his flowers. Who decided flowers were important for anything anyway? There's so much stuff that's cooler than flowers. Like comic books. Or candy bars. Or baseballs.
America

Dear America,
If you send me a bouquet of baseballs for my birthday again, I'm going to hit you.
Sincerely, England

England
Well NOW I'm not going to, since you can't appreciate the great American pastime.
America

America,
Just so you know, he's not American.
Canada

Canada
I KNOW THAT. How dumb do you think I am?
America

America,
Please don't make me answer that.
Canada

Canada
All I'm trying to say, is you don't have to be American to like baseball. Its a universal sport. YOUR not American and YOU like it.
America

America,
I've told you before that I don't.
Canada

Dear America,
WHAT are you doing? You keep placing your notebook beside you, then picking it up and writing in it, then repeating this process. Have you been hit in the head with a baseball one too many times?
Sincerely, England

England
I'm talking to my brother. He's RIGHT THERE. Right next to me. See? I think your eyesights going in your old age.
America

Dear America,
I don't think we can really be considered brothers anymore, and I'm not next to you anyway. There's no one next to you except France, who doesn't count for anything.
Sincerely, England

My dear Angleterre,
First—what CAN the two of you be considered, now? Second—you expressed some VERY different sentiments when we were alone last night.
Love, France
P. S. Alone last night in my bedroom, to clarify.

France-
Not you too.
Everyone-
Please, for the love of all that is holy, stop passing notes. Look, Spain isn't even talking about flowers anymore.
-Germany

France,
FUCK OFF.
Sincerely, England

Germany
Well yeah but its not like Bulgaria has anything cool to say either.
America

My dear Angleterre,
Please, let us save that for when we are not surrounded by observers... unless you're into that sort of thing.
Love, France

Uh, Iggy...?
America

America,
Do not call me that.
Sincerely, England
P.S. Goodbye.
P.P.S. France, don't you dare follow me.
P.P.P.S. Germany, I'll stop passing notes if you make sure France stays in his seat.

Hey, everybody...
Um, does anyone know why England just stormed out? B/C I think Germany looks like he's ready to kill someone.
Poland

Dear Poland,
I haven't the foggiest clue about the motivations behind England's behavior (well, other than that he is a brat,) but I'm nearly certain that Germany is going to kick America out. Care for a small wager?
Love, France

France...
Define small. B/C if you're talking about sexual favors again, the answer is totally no.
Poland

France
A hero is always up for anything! But I agree with Poland, I'm NOT having sex with you.
America

Dear Poland and America,
I'm shocked, I really am, at both of you. I would be perfectly willing to allow both the prize and the price of this wager to be intercourse with me, but I will settle for nude photographs.
Love, France

France...
Puh-lease, bitch. Who do you think I am, Miley Cirus? My ass is NOT going up all over the Internet, thank you very much.
Poland

Yo guys
Germany's got a new power point up and he's glaring at us but I can't read it cuz I forgot my glasses. What does it say?
America

America,
It says "The Risks Inherent in Passing Notes Rather than Paying Attention During Important Summits".
Canada

Canada
Ohhhhhh. Wait really?
America

America,
Yes. Slide three involves a pencil sharpener and an oddly-shaped ruler.
Canada

Dear Canada,
Sounds kinky, non?
Love, France

Canada
Did France just get kicked out for passing notes during a powerpoint about not passing notes? That's REALLY IRONIC. lol.
America

Canada
Dude answer me. You know you wanna.
America

America,
If you pass me one more note, I'm swear I'm going to burn down your Capitol. Again.
Canada

Japan
Man this power point is interesting isn't it?
America

Apparently Eggy will take any excuse to reference the War of 1812. *sniff* I'm so proud of her.

Okay, so this kind of comes out of nowhere, but is anyone interested in reading all about the marching band AU that's probably never going to get written? I think people are getting really sick of me spamming Facebook every five minutes with "Ironically enough, England is the biggest French horn player who ever French horn played" and "Italy's the guy who passes out EVERY SINGLE PRACTICE. The first time was genuine (he locked his knees in the sun. You NEVER DO THAT.) but the other times he was just trying to get out of marching. He hangs out with the drum majors, and Romano gets SO PISSED that even though he never practices, his stupid little bro's a better marcher than him."

So I figured it might make more sense to just condense all that crap into a LJ post that band kids can crack up at and nobody else can understand. Would anyone actually read that?