Ch. 14 - Sit There in Your Heartache

When James was finally able to leave the hospital wing, he never could've been happier. Yeah, not having homework was nice and driving that Slytherin bloke crazy was pretty bloody funny, but he was ready to go back to pranking and asking Lily Evans out again.

The rest of the school was just getting out from dinner when he was walking down the hall with a new bounce in his step and he caught up with his fellow Marauders easily.

"Good evening!" he exclaimed, grinning, and they looked at him in surprise and slight unease.

"Oh! James! Hi!" Sirius exclaimed, too loudly.

James raised his eyebrows. "What the bloody hell's wrong with you?"

"Er, James," Peter muttered, "Lily sorta got asked out to Hogsmeade next week."

"What? By who? Did she say yes? When?" he bombarded them, panic rising in his chest.

"Well – James – it just happened, and you should stay calm, alright?" Sirius urged him, "It was . . . it was Steven Smiley."

"St – Steven Smiley?" James repeated quietly.

" . . . Yeah . . ."

"What did she say?"

"Erm . . ."

"She said yes?" he nearly screamed and they all made various exclamations of surprise.

"James! Stay calm!" Sirius exclaimed.

"But he's a – he's a Hufflepuff!" he yelled, tugging on his hair. "And – and I – I love her!"

"Oh, James, shut it, mate," Sirius said, rolling his eyes. "You're being over dramatic. Just ask someone else."

"I don't want to ask someone else."

"Maybe it'll do the old trick and make her jealous?" Peter suggested half-heartedly.

"Why in the hell would she get jealous?" James grumbled, "She's obviously fine with Smiley. And I mean what I creepy name, am I right? He's just so creepy. And who cares if he's a year older? I can be mature. I can, guys! Maybe I should ask another girl out. I mean, I've seen Lola Fairfield checking me out lately –"

"Very gentlemanly, James." Peter snorted.

"Well, it's true. Remus, why are you being so quiet?" James asked suddenly.

Remus snapped his head up to him. He seemed to have been in deep thought. He shook his head distractedly. "Just tired, Prongs."

James paused, then shrugged. "Alright then. So I think I am going to ask Lola out, I mean she is pretty smokin', and then I could just look really good that day, you know? I mean, I hope my hair doesn't act up too bad. . . ."

XXX

Remus was afraid he'd never be able to look James in the eye again. He'd been released from the hospital wing only a couple days after his and Lily's kissing episode, and they'd agreed to not tell James about it for fear of his reaction. But Remus wasn't so sure he was cut out for it. He couldn't just stand there and be his friend with what he did to the girl he loved on his mind.

He just wasn't that kind of person. And he knew the truth would come out eventually. It was just waiting for the worst possible moment.

XXX

Lily must've been out of her mind. She must've been out of her mind to kiss Remus like that – well, she was intoxicated – and she must've been out of her mind to accept Smiley's offer to go to Hogsmeade with him. Steven Smiley had his name for a good reason – his smile never left his face, and Lily was sure she'd go blind if she had to endure it for a whole entire date.

She had tried to convince herself that she was trying to try and date around, but she knew deep down that it was a vain attempt to make Remus jealous. It was horrible of her, and she hated that she was acting like a child. If she fancied Remus, she needed to go up and tell him, not play a school girl's games.

Also, she didn't want to admit it, but another part of the reason for accepting was because of James. She didn't want him to think her apology was some grand gesture of love, because Merlin knows he had a knack for over exaggerating things, and – and she just couldn't deal with it all.

She just wondered how long it would be until she would explode. So she could set up her schedule accordingly.

XXX

Sirius had been expecting this. James had stayed up nearly all night jabbering and plotting and whatnot, and now they were at breakfast the next day and he just sat there pouting like a child.

Sirius gave a very amused chuckled and leaned over his food with his elbows on the table. Dorcas sat beside him (and Lily across from her, who was quite sheepishly ignoring James' stare) and turned to him with a curious expression.

"And what are you laughing at?" she asked, smiling.

He bit his lip and shrugged. She gave him a look, and he relented, nodding his head to James. She leaned over him and snorted at James, who was stuffing his face shamelessly.

"Ah. It's Smiley then, is it?" she murmured, and Sirius nodded. "You know she doesn't really like that bloke, he's ridiculous. Something's going on with her that she won't even tell me."

Sirius frowned thoughtfully. "Those two cause so much drama it's bloody insane."

They both laughed into their hands, and James glowered at him. "What's so funny?" he asked, his cheeks full of food.

Sirius leaned over and muttered, "Man up and talk to her, Prongs. Don't make me call you what I'm thinking."

James glowered at him even more and Sirius barely held his laughter. "Go on then." James urged defiantly.

"James –"

"No, no, it'll probably make me do it. Say it."

Sirius pursed his lips to keep his laughter under control, but when James punched his arm, he looked at him with raised eyebrows and mouthed, "Twat."

James gaped at him in disbelief. "You son of a –"

But then it was time for first class and Sirius bolted out of there with Dorcas right behind him, but not before giving him a meaningful look. He and Dorcas fast-walked out into the corridor, laughing, and then Sirius slipped his hand into hers, flashing her a smile. She looked surprised but then smiled leaning herself against him with a chuckle.

XXX

"Lily. Lily!" James exclaimed, but she was ignoring him, so he had to catch up with her.

He caught her arm and she turned to look at him. "James, I've got to get to class." She said, not meeting his eyes.

"So is that apology null and void now? You're just going to ignore me again?" he inquired, with more anger than he thought he was holding in.

She met his gaze in shock. "No, of course I meant my apology, it's just – I'm sorry, I didn't want you to be upset."

"You mean you didn't want to deal with me being upset." He clarified. He was acting more bitter than he meant to.

"Listen, James, it's just a date, and it's not like you have any say in who I go out with anyway –"

"But it's Steven Smiley, Lily! What are you thinking?"

"He's kind, James –"

"He's a Hufflepuff!"

"What the – what is that nonsense about Hufflepuffs? They're just as much of a House as Gryffindor, Potter –"

"Oh, breakin' out the surnames now, are we?"

"Oh, stop being so immature!"

"Me? You won't even tell me why you would ever consider Smiley –"

"I tried to, but it's none of your business anyway –"

"But you could do so much better than him, Lily –"

"Like who? You?"

There was a silence and James stared at her blankly. "Am I really that bad, Evans?"

"No, James, no," she whispered, her eyes watering as she reached out and touched his chest. "I didn't mean it. You're wonderful, you really are, and any girl would be lucky to have you. So why don't you chase after them?"

And then she walked away, clutching her books tightly to her chest. James stood in the middle of the now empty corridor, battling the urges to get out of there and go after her. But more so, he was trying to ignore the way his chest throbbed. Was there really such a thing as a broken heart?

A/N: Bit of a corny line there at the end, but you know, you need one every once and a while in these romances. Hope you enjoyed. Tell me what you think!