A/N: Helloooo. :) I've been away for quite a while, I know, and while my life's not exactly all back on track, I'm dealing with the hand I was dealt. :) I just figure writing's supposed to be a form of escapism, so don't worry, I'm not givin' up on this story. I love these characters too much. :D

So I welcome you back to my little universe, and thanks for stickin' with me. Happy reading!

"Wherever I go, whatever I do, I wonder where I am in my relationship to you – wherever you go, wherever you are, I watch your life play out in pictures from afar . . . wherever you go, oh, wherever you are, I watch that pretty life play out in pictures from afar . . ." – John Mayer

Wherever I Go and Whatever I Do

Dorcas and Sirius burst into James' room, ready to do their worst, but instead found him passed out on the bed. He held a picture limply in his hand and some nice Quidditch gear was resting on his nightstand. It was probably Lily's present to him (the other two had gotten theirs earlier this morning as well). They had been prepared to tackle James, hold him down, and threaten to spit on him if he didn't tell them what was wrong, but the prick just had to be asleep.

Sirius and Dorcas gave each other a look. "So much for that plan." Sirius muttered.

Dorcas ignored him and walked forward, softly plucking the photograph from James' hand. It was a captured moment from the train ride back home for Christmas of the two of them laughing their cute little arses off. Dorcas sighed and propped the photo against his lamp, glancing at Sirius to find he was studying the Quidditch gear closely.

"Holy Merlin," he muttered, picking up one of the gloves and rubbing it against his face. "It's so soft!"

"Sirius," Dorcas said wearily, "Could you please –? "

"Kill him . . ." James muttered, his brow furrowed. Sirius and Dorcas shared a wide eyed look. "I'll kill you, Snape . . ."

"That greasy little twat had something to do with this?" Sirius hissed, and Dorcas hushed him.

"You'll wake him." She murmured, leaning closer to James.

"Lily . . . please, I didn't mean it . . ." he mumbled, turning over so his face was in his pillows. He started to talk again, but it was muffled. Dorcas cursed under her breath and looked to Sirius for help, but her boyfriend just shrugged.

"I think Snape is a good enough clue." Sirius growled, glaring at nothing in particular.

"Maybe, but he could've said more. We don't even know where Snape is." She whispered helplessly.

Sirius leaned against the bed post and Dorcas knew by the way he smirked that he had an idea. "He's not just going to leave school though, is he?"

Dorcas frowned. "Well, I suppose not. But Sirius, we need to figure out what's really –"

"What . . . are you guys doing in here?" James muttered as he flopped over onto his back, rubbing his eyes.

Dorcas and Sirius shared yet another frozen, wide eyed glance.

"Just checkin' on you, Prongsie." Sirius said, sitting on the edge of the bed.

James shoved his glasses on and eyed both of them suspiciously. "Look, I'm fine. And yes, I do realize what I did with Lily, I know it was stupid, I know –"

"Does this have something to do with Snape?" Sirius cut him off, almost flippantly.

Dorcas shoved him, giving him a tight lipped look. James sat up harshly, looking between them.

"Why the hell would you ask something like that?" he inquired through stiff lips.

"You know, I don't know if it's the fact you're a terrible liar or I know you so well, but that right there made it pretty obvious it does indeed have something to do with Snape." Sirius said simply, shaking his head.

James swallowed thickly. They didn't understand. Sirius and Dorcas shared another one of their many looks that day and Sirius sighed, able to read his best friend like a book.

"Look, James, we'll leave you alone and let you deal with this by yourself for a while – but you're mad if you think we're going to let you two suffer for long."

James didn't meet their eyes, and Dorcas furrowed her brow in concern. It must be really bad, or James wouldn't be this dedicated to pushing them away.

Dorcas put her hand on James' and pressed her lips together, but he didn't even look at her then. "We're here for you, James."

"There's nothing you can do, guys," he murmured, looking to the window. "Just let me handle it."

Sirius sported an annoyed look and mouthed to Dorcas, "Like hell."

Dorcas shook her head and grabbed his arm, dragging him out of their best friend's room. Dorcas' mind tried to put the pieces together, but there was so little they knew and none of it was for sure. It was quite possible that Snape was involved, which made sense, but how or when he even got to James wasn't clear, and it was also obvious that James did not want to break up with Lily. The question was, why was James going through with it? What had Snape threatened him with? And were they actually watching him to make sure he followed through?

Even if they wanted to confront Snape about it, they would have to wait until school started back up in a week. They didn't know what Snape was into nowadays, but Dorcas had a hunch that it had a lot to do with You-Know-Who and she and Sirius were definitely not ready to walk into that.

So now, like so many other times, they'd just have to wait and be there for James in whatever way they could.

XXX

The last week of Christmas break went by very fast for Lily. Her family was extremely supportive, in their own unique way. Well, her parents were – in Petunia's case, Lily supposed 'unique' could be translated to pretty much ignoring her completely.

What really cheered Lily up, though, is that the girls came by for a visit the day before they would leave back to school to catch up and whatnot. They'd sleep over and they'd all just leave for the train together in the morning. Alice and Mary had already arrived and Lily had filled them in on what had happened over the break, although she couldn't answer most of their "why's" considering she didn't know the answer to, well, all of them. When Dorcas stumbled not-so-gracefully through the fireplace, Lily honestly probably reacted too eagerly to her arrival.

"Dorcas!" she yelled, and Dorcas yelped in surprise, turning her wide eyes to Lily.

"Lily!" she responded, chuckling.

"How's –" she started urgently, but then stopped, rethinking it. She tried for nonchalant. "So . . . how's, uh, how's . . . Sirius?"

She smirked, setting down her bags. "He's fine. James is holding up, too, Lily. You're so obvious."

Lily sighed and plopped back down on the couch in between Mary and Alice. Mary rubbed her back and Alice grabbed her hand, assuring her, "I guarantee he's going through the same thing, Lils. He's crazy about you, you know that."

"Yeah, something's just going on inside of his idiotic male head that's freaking him out. Probably commitment issues." Mary grumbled, squeezing her shoulder.

Lily pouted and looked to Dorcas, who was still standing and looking way to innocent. She knew something. Lily narrowed her eyes.

"Hey, Dorcas?" she said casually, looking down at her fingernails.

"Yeah?"

"What do you know?" she immediately demanded, looking up at her pointedly.

". . . Nothing."

"Oh, my God, you totally know something! You say I'm obvious!" Lily exclaimed, standing.

"Lily, please –"

"Girls? Is everything alright?" Lily's mum asked from the kitchen.

"Fine, mum!" Lily called, her hard eyes still on Dorcas.

"Well, come get your dinner! I've made enough for all of you!" she announced excitedly, and Lily sighed in aggravation. "It's my special lasagna!"

Lily rolled her eyes, but Dorcas quickly scampered toward the kitchen. "I'm actually really hungry, so I'll just be going." She said in an unnaturally high voice.

Lily glowered at nothing in particular, her arms over her chest, and was oblivious to the looks Mary and Alice shared behind her back before they both continued their comforting gesture s – Mary rubbing her back, Alice grabbing her hand.

"Honey, I'm sure it's nothing that important, Dorcas is probably just . . . nervous about . . . school." Alice attempted to explain, making a face at her lame excuse.

Lily let her arms drop and looked between them. "It's fine – it's perfectly fine. You know why? Because Dorcas will be here all night – and she will crack eventually! Mark my words!"

XXX

"Come on, Dorcas, please!" Lily whined, kicking her legs. She lay on her back on her bed, her head hanging off the side as she begged with her best friend.

Dorcas slapped a hand to her face. "Lily. Will you let it go?" she exclaimed exasperatedly.

"No!" she cried, "I want to know why my boyfriend broke up with me out of nowhere!"

"Look, Lily –"

"I mean, things were going so well!"

"Lils –"

"He even made this big speech about us having each other was enough for him – I mean, what rubbish!"

"Lily –"

"What am I going to do when school starts? DEAR MERLIN –"

"LILY. EVANS."

Lily snapped her eyes into focus to find all three of them staring at her with wide eyes. There was a moment of silence. She slowly turned over onto her stomach and cleared her throat, playing with a stray thread on her bed spread.

"I'm going to act normal, of course." She mumbled, trying to redeem herself.

"Yes, please, do not act like that." Alice said slowly.

"Yeah, I just had to get it out." She admitted sheepishly.

"It's alright," Dorcas sighed, "Look, Lily, I promise you, I will do everything I can to stop this situation, alright? I just can't tell you, and you have to trust me on this."

Lily studied her friend's stern but sympathetic face for a moment before nodding reluctantly. "I trust you, Dorcas," she said, "But can't you just give me something?"

She paused and sighed, nodding. "He loves you, Lily. I know he does." She murmured.

Lily half-smiled and turned her eyes back to the stray thread, her throat constricting.

Alice glanced at Dorcas uncertainly and muttered out of the corner of her mouth, "But you're gonna tell us, right?"

"Aw, Alice!"

"Come on!"

"Have some restraint, woman!"

She put her hands up in surrender. "Sheesh, alright! Just checking . . ."