Nine
Failure is a word that the Baudelaires were becoming quite familiar with, and it is a word that I myself have used to describe their situation along with the one that affects me each and everytime I think back to better days when my beloved Beatrice was still alive.
The Baudelaires felt that they were failures for a great many reasons, because they had failed to save Uncle Monty and they had failed to rescue Aunt Josephine and they had failed to prevent the death of Dr. Orwell and they had failed to protect the Quagmires at Prufrock Prep and they had failed to stop Esmé Squalor from pushing them into an elevator shaft and they had failed to save Jacques Snicket from a dangerous town and they had failed to prevent the Library of Records from going up in smoke and they had failed to uncover the secrets that Madam Lulu had to offer and they had failed to save the Snow Scouts atop Mt. Fraught and they had failed to find Captain Widdershins or his adopted daughter and they had failed to prove to all of the volunteers that the dangerous judges at the Hotel Denouement were allied with Count Olaf and they had failed to stop Ishmael and the islanders from leaving them stranded on the island and then they had failed to prevent the fire at the Very Fine Dwelling and they had failed to save the powder-faced woman from the fire at the Ned H. Rirger Theater and they'd failed to find out what was inside the sugar bowl at the Anxious Clown diner and now they had failed to find the missing luggage onboard the In-Finite Express or to figure out just what Mister Dominic was after.
Yes the many unfortunate events that the four children had faced made them feel like failures, and Klaus, Violet, Beatrice and Sunny felt that they were failures because of all the things that they hadn't accomplished, just as I feel that I am a failure because I failed to warn the Duchess of Count Olaf's presence or how I failed to send a carrier pigeon to the correct location or how I failed to believe that you could write a two-hundred page book on the reasons that we couldn't be together, my darling Beatrice.
So the word failure if you looked it up in the dictionary might likely have my picture beside it, or even the Baudelaires' if it was one that the children had published; but the fact of the matter was that Klaus and his sisters were not failures even though the many unfortunate events they dealt with made them feel like such.
The reason I can say this is because a failure tends to give up all together and is a coward and someone who even thinks that faking their own death is a good way to stay hidden, but the children hadn't given up all together; and they were certainly not cowards and none of them had attempted to fake their own deaths; so therefore the Baudelaires are not failures even if they themselves feel that they are.
And the reason I am telling you all of these things dear reader is because in much the same way that the children weren't there to stop Stephano from murdering Uncle Monty or prevent Captain Sham from drowning Aunt Josephine or figure out in time that Klaus was hypnotized by Shirley or realize that by running Coach Genghis' S.O.R.E.'s that they were unable to save their friends or notice the lot being taken out of the Veblan Hall by Gunther's henchmen or grab a hold of the ladder on Hector's Vertical Floatation Device before Detective Dupin shot them down or find all the pages to the Snicket File before Matthias burned it down or convince the freaks that they weren't freakish or stop Carmeletia Spats from joining their enemies or prevent Fiona from joining up with her brother or save Dewey or stop Ishmael or warn the volunteers or the audience or Sally Sebald, that very soon the children would not be able to save Thursday in an unfortunate event that will befall the train attendant and will again believe that they have failed.
Because the very next morning, Violet, Klaus, Sunny and Beatrice all felt their heads were spinning whenever they awoke in the twenty-third passenger car of the In-Finite Express and found lying there on the floor another well drawn map, detailing somewhere on the train that they needed to go to. Violet leaned down and picked up the drawing and noted that this time there were only the letters R, S, T, U, V, and W on it; and the letter R was circled and at the bottom of the map the words this time were: GO HERE.
She passed it to her brother who commented, "That's the Restaurant, the Bistro Smelt; do you suppose it is a trap?"
"Last time we followed a map it led us straight to Mister Dominic," Sunny pointed out.
"And we should be focusing on finding Professor Edwick's termite collection, not being led into more dangerous situations," Violet decided as she examined it again. "But we still don't know if a villain or a volunteer made this," Klaus commented and then added, "We do know that no one we've met so far is responsible for the theft of the termites."
"If they really were stolen," Sunny commented. "I'm not convinced anything Mister Dominic says is true," Violet said as she reflected on a recent conversation she had overheard between their nemesis and Professor Edwick. "We should show this map to one of the train attendants," Sunny decided. "But what if they're against us?" Klaus asked.
"We can't do this all on our own!" Violet pointed out, to which her younger sister commented, "I wish Falo hadn't chosen to abandon us." "I'm convinced that a lot of people have chosen to abandon us," Klaus said sadly. No one made a comment after this remark, until at last Violet roused Beatrice from her sleep and then stated, "If we're going to find the Medusoid Mycelium and stop Mister Dominic we can't do it here. I'm convinced that the reason he made that offer to join his side last night is because he is convinced that we are a threat to him."
"You're right Violet, let's head to the Restaurant and see what we can find," Klaus said, and then the four siblings got off of the uncomfortable waterbeds and started toward the eighteenth passenger car of the In-Finite Express. The volunteers fighting disease were already up and humming their cheerful tune, and the bearded volunteer was explaining, "Whenever we arrive at our next destination there will probably be a lot of sick people who need a heart shaped balloon.
And as they passed thru the assortment of detritus in the Undecided passenger car, Violet wished that they could take the time to look thru it all so that she could invent something that would help them.
They heard Vice Principal Nero practicing his violin, as terribly as ever; in the Teacher passenger car and Sunny was quite glad that she would never have to work for that horrible man again.
They didn't hear a sound at all in the empty Suite car, and so finally reached the Bistro Smelt where many passengers were enjoying a brunch. Violet looked around the room to sure that Mister Dominic wasn't hiding somewhere and then commented, "It looks like our nemesis isn't here." "Do you see anyone else that we might know?" Klaus asked, checking the map again to be sure he hadn't read it wrong.
Just then, the train attendant named Thursday spotted them and gestured for them to come and sit at the booth he was in. Violet and her siblings weren't sure what to do, but decided that the best thing to do was to go and sit down; even if they weren't sure what Thursday had to discuss with them. "Good morning!" the tall lanky attendant remarked as they sat down and he added, "Have you found that man's missing luggage yet?"
"I'm afraid that we haven't," Sunny admitted. Thursday frowned and then remarked, "Well how hard can it be? The In-Finite Express only has twenty-seven passenger cars. Didn't you check all of them?
" "We couldn't go any farther than the sixth car because the door to the Employees only passenger car is locked," Violet pointed out. "Well then you should've gotten a key," Thursday countered, to which Klaus replied, "We looked in the Filing passenger car but couldn't find a key."
"Well that's because the keys aren't kept there! Keys are kept in the eleventh car, the Kitchen of course," Thursday remarked. Sunny and her older siblings looked confused to hear this, but the former infant stated, "We didn't know that."
"Well it doesn't matter anyway, I have good news!" Thursday declared. "You found the missing luggage?" Klaus asked.
"No," the train attendant replied and then explained, "I think I finally remember who you four are!" Violet, Klaus, Sunny and Beatrice weren't sure if this was good news or not, and the youngest member of the Baudelaires commented softly, "Tirofnur," which probably meant "Let's get out of here before Thursday reveals who we are," or perhaps, "I'm not ready to eat prison food."
"You're Klyde, Susie, and Veronica," Thursday declared with a sly smile and then added, "However I thought for sure your mother was going to name you, Violet." The eldest Baudelaire decided to be brave and replied, "Actually my name is Violet, but how did you know that?"
"You're the Baudelaires!" the train attendant said in a hushed tone and then looked around the Bistro Smelt and commented, "I suppose it isn't safe to say that out loud."
"Who are you?" Sunny asked. "I thought I already told you my name, children. I'm Thursday," Thursday answered. "But how do you know who we are?" Klaus asked with a sigh.
"Well whenever you boarded the train I thought all of you looked familiar, and then when I saw your picture in The Daily Punctilio I remembered the name of the leaders of V.F.D. They were also the Baudelaires. Are you related to them?" Thursday asked.
"They were our parents, but they died a long time ago," Sunny said sadly. "I'm so sorry to hear about that, it must've happened while I was stranded on the island," the attendant remarked.
"Excuse me, but you've still failed to explain how it is you knew our parents," Violet said. "Why I am a member of the same organization as they were," Thursday said with a smile and then added, "Although I have been thinking lately that she might be switching allegiances."
"Did you draw this?" Sunny asked, eagerly passing the map to the mysterious man who answered, "No, I don't know anything about drawing. I was a researcher back in the heyday. But none of that matters right now! At last I've managed to catch up with other members of V.F.D.! Please tell me you're headed to the rendezvous as well."
Violet smiled, feeling that their luck was turning about and then stated, "Yes, that's right. A man named Lemony told us to go there."
Thursday frowned and then scowled, "Oh he's still alive is he?" Klaus and his sisters felt nervous at Thursday's tone, but then the train attendant grew calmer as he sighed and said, "I'm sorry children, sometimes I cling to the past too much. But I'm getting myself sidetracked! I am headed to the rendezvous as well you see."
"Who sent you?" Sunny asked. "I was invited by the Duchess, I'm quite sure you were too. And I immediately decided to apply as a train attendant so that I could get there as quickly as possible. This train was once owned by V.F.D. you know," Thursday commented.
"We were sent an invitation back at the Ned H. Rirger Theater, but we thought that someone else had told us to go there. We don't know anything about a Duchess," Klaus stated.
"Her and your mother were close friends before the schism, and even afterward thru secret messages they remained close. But I guess they aren't anymore since your mother is dead," Thursday said regretfully.
"If you're headed to the rendezvous, then you must know where this train is headed," Sunny realized. "Well of course I do, I'm one of the attendants!" the lanky man said with a chuckle and then added, "But now that I know who you are then you must tell me who are the villains onboard this train that stole the termite collection?"
"We don't know," Klaus admitted. "The villains are the ones who owned the termites, Professor Edwick and Mister Dominic," Violet told the dirty, brown haired man.
"Nonsense! Those two have been members of V.F.D. for the longest time! Even your parents trusted them," Thursday argued. "Maybe that is why they're now dead," Sunny said sadly.
"We know that Mister Dominic is a dangerous man," Violet explained and then added, "Recently he stole something frighteningly poisonous from Anwhistle Aquatics."
"You mean the Medusoid Mycelium," Thursday declared with a frown and then stated, "I can see that there is a lot going on that I am unaware of. Maybe Miranda was right and I shouldn't have left and maybe it would've turned out better… I suppose it depends on how you look at it."
The children still felt like they had failed to get anything important from Thursday and so Sunny declared, "Excuse me sir, but you're not making very much sense. Why is it that you've not been amongst V.F.D. lately?"
"I was stranded on the island for quite some time, and then whenever I returned to the world in general; the schism had already caused so much division I wanted to stay out of it," Thursday answered.
"Did you know a man named Ishmael?" Klaus asked. "Absolutely," the train attendant answered. "I remember who you are!" Violet said with a smile and almost blurted it so loud that other passengers turned to look at her in surprise. Then the eldest Baudelaire said, "You were an ally of Kit Snicket, weren't you?"
"That's correct, last time we met was over a year ago and we were having Turkish tea together," Thursday said as he smiled at the fond memory and then asked, "How is Kit doing?" Sunny looked down at their adopted sister who was also quite sad to think of her mother and Klaus finally explained, "I'm sorry… but Kit died too, on the very same island that you escaped from."
"Rethguad," Beatrice said, which probably meant, "Even though Violet, Klaus and Sunny have adopted me; I will always miss my mother." "That sounds like a very unfortunate event, children. I guess a lot has happened since I became involved in things," Thursday admitted. "We often feel the same way. We've been on the island for a year now," Violet answered.
"Did you meet my wife or my daughter?" the tall lanky attendant asked. "Was your daughter's name Friday?" Sunny asked.
"Yes, that's right. My girl Friday! How is she?" he asked, beaming with pride.
"I'm afraid we don't know that either. A year ago on Decision Day the islanders all left with Ishmael. We haven't seen them since… and we don't know what happened to them," Klaus admitted.
"Seems like you four only have part of the story, just like me," Thursday admitted sadly and then stated, "The only reason I even chose to go see the Duchess is because I suspected that my sister had switched sides." "Monday?" Sunny asked in surprise and then added, "But she seems so pleasant." "A lot of wicked people can seem that way, but I am under the impression that Count Olaf turned her to villainy because of a political scandal," Thursday remarked and then asked, "I'm guessing that notorious villain is still trying to obtain that fortune of yours?"
"Count Olaf is dead," Violet answered and then the train attendant quipped, "Now there is someone who deserved to be dead." "But none of this matters right now, does it?" Sunny blurted out in exasperation and then muttered, "Thursday you have to help us stop Mister Dominic before something terrible happens onboard this train!"
"I suppose you're right, I'll do whatever I can," he said passing the drawing back to Klaus and then adding, "I must say it seems rather foolish for that Professor to bring a termite collection onboard this luxurious locomotive especially whenever it is made entirely of wood." "Then finding his collection should be our first task," Violet decided as she folded up the map; glad that she had her siblings had chosen to follow it to the Restaurant and feeling for the first time in quite a while that their luck was turning around.
I'm sure if you had been onboard the In-Finite Express alongside Klaus, Sunny, Beatrice and Violet as they followed Thursday to the Quiet car you might've thought that things were about to get much better for the children now that they had met a member of V.F.D. and that member was going to assist them, but I would like to remind you of the warning I gave at the beginning of this chapter; that much like the Baudelaire's friend Mrs. Caliban, my beloved sister, her fiancé, Count Olaf, Uncle Monty, Aunt Josephine, Dr. Orwell, Esmé Squalor, Justice Strauss, Madam Lulu, Ike, Gonzalo, the first Duchess, my departed brother and my darling Beatrice; Thursday would very soon be dead and unable to help the orphans at all.
They passed thru the Quiet car, and the Passenger car and the Open car and the Neophyte car and the Manicure car and the Lounge and the Kitchen and as they approached the Junction car; Klaus commented, "Where are we headed to, Thursday?"
"To find my sister so that I can find out if she has switched sides or not," he explained.
The attendant making sea cucumber soup turned and remarked, "I believe Monday was in the Inventory looking for something." "Do you have any bowls of soup for us today?" Sunny asked hopefully.
"It isn't lunch time yet, and besides all employees eat in the Dining car," the train attendant remarked. "Ronald these are the Baudelaires," Thursday explained. "So what if they are?" Ronald replied bitterly and then went back to what he was doing. The tall lanky former islander shrugged and then pressed onto the next passenger car before Violet finally stated, "I hope that Monday hasn't switched sides; and maybe she can tell us who drew this map." "It depends on how you look at it," Thursday said and then added, "Just because someone is wicked does that mean that you can't trust them anymore?"
"It depends on how you look at it," the train attendant repeated and then the five of them entered the Inventory car where his sister was rummaging thru the luggage.
"Monday! What're you doing in here? No luggage is to opened until we arrive at our destination," Thursday told her. The frilly haired woman looked up and then spotted the Baudelaires and asked, "Thursday! What're they doing here? Don't you know who they are?"
"Of course, these are the Baudelaires!" the tall lanky man answered.
"They've aligned themselves with the Snickets," Monday countered. "So what if they have?" Thursday remarked and then stated, "I'm willing to let bygones be bygones if it means seeing my girl again."
"Friday is dead!" Monday spat back. Klaus and his sisters saw that now the frilly haired woman was moving toward them and the eldest orphan commented, "I'm pretty sure that she has switched sides."
"Just let me reason with her," Thursday whispered back and then proclaimed to his sister, "The Baudelaires have told me that Count Olaf is dead. That means all the crimes you've been accused of will likely be dropped." "You're behind in the times, brother! I knew that quite a while ago. I'm with Dominic now! And we're going to rob this train!" Monday answered.
"But there isn't anything valuable on the In-Finite Express," Thursday argued. "Except the lumber that it is made out of," his sister pointed out and then added, "Which I'm sure is why someone stole our terrific termites!"
"Monday, maybe it would be easier if we talked somewhere else," Klaus suggested as he saw that some of the luggage above was becoming quite wobbly and Violet nodded and suggested, "Yes, let's all step back into the Junction car and talk about this." "I'm thru being told what to do! That's why I left that wretched island in the first place, Baudelaires! And I'm never going back!" Monday said as she took another step toward them and then Thursday took a step toward his sister, and I'm afraid to say it was the very last one he ever did take.
His right elbow bumped against the luggage that was already teetering back and forth and the four orphans saw before it was too late what was going to happen. Monday apparently did too, and took a step back the way she had come and watched as the luggage began to collapse.
Thursday didn't even have time to suggest anything at all to his sister, but merely cried out in alarm as the large heavy bags crushed him and then other pieces of luggage fell on top of him altogether in one giant heap and the mess in the Inventory car looked even worse than it had before. And perhaps to make matters worse, Monday was staring straight at the Baudelaires and snarled, "You murdered my dear brother! You will pay for this dearly orphans! I swear you will!"
And worst of all, the four children had failed again to save someone that might've had a key piece of information and became familiar with being failures all over again.
The Baudelaire's journey is coming to a jarring conclusion! Thursday is gone and the truth is looming closer! Who is sending the mysterious messages onboard the train? It depends on how you look at it...read and review please!