Michael stood as he watched the red-head talk to some girl. Who was she? It couldn't be Toby's girlfriend- he was all alone. And besides, she was cute. Well as cute as someone could be who would talk to Toby. But still, maybe he had poisoned her. Maybe he had slipped her the date rape drug. If that was the case Michael knew he had better spring into action right away.
"I'm sorry to bother you miss but I couldn't help but notice you were standing here next to this man, and I was wondering how exactly you knew him."
"Not that it's any of your business but we just met. He bought me a drink," the girl, obviously irritated replied.
"So this stranger whom you just admitted you've never seen before just bought you a drink.. don't you think that's a little suspicious? Wait…put that glass down!" Michael knocked the glass out of her hand. "You don't know what he put in it. For all you know this man could be a serial rapist."
"I'm, I'm not a serial rapist," Toby protested as the girl pushed him off of her. "I'm not a rapist."
He turned to look at his accuser. "Really, Michael? A rapist? That's a strong accusation to make about me. Do you usually feel this strongly about things?" He took a deep breath, trying to avoid a confrontation. If there was anything Toby hated in the world it was confrontation. He confronted Cathy once. He'd heard something about her and his best friend. She didn't deny it. Confrontation usually never worked.
"Only about the things I hate. Like rapists. And Al-queda. And smurfs. And you."
"Michael, this isn't work. You don't have to be here." Toby paused. "Why are you here anyways?"
Michael looked away. He didn't know why he was there or what he wanted. How did you tell the one person you hated in the world that you wanted something from him- that you needed him more than you needed your own self just for that night? Sure, he could tell Toby that he just needed a friend, and Toby's stupid face would probably light up and he would be grateful for the chance to help someone. Who needed that?
Sensing the change in Michael's mood, Toby quickly changed the subject. "Would you like to play a game of pool?"
Michael nodded. They went to the pool room, where Toby proceeded to solidly beat Michael at the first game. Michael was pissed. He shoved his stick at him and spun around in frustration.
"Oh no no no. You cheated. I know you cheated because you suck. You suck at everything you do. You are no way better at pool than I am."
"Would you like to play again?"
"Yes but no cheating this time. I go first."
This time Michael did win, and he was even less of a gracious winner than he was a loser. By now Toby knew that his chances of leaving with a woman were less than none, but for some reason Michael needed him tonight, though God knew why.
Just then Michael attempted to stand on the pool table. "Attention everyone. I am Michael Scott and I am the king of the pool hall. I challenge anyone to beat me, if they dare, in the age old tradition of pool. I can take on anyone anytime. That's what she said. Hahaha. You, you in that black ripped up shirt," he said pointing to the biggest biker guy he could find. "I challenge you… winner takes a thousand dollars!"
Toby knew that by himself he was no match for that biker and that with the two of them together they would be even more worthless, so he had to do something. Michael resisted at first but Toby managed to pull him down and get him out the door. All the way back to Michael's condo he heard nothing but a lot of false bravado about how he could have taken the guy down, how he could have had any woman there, how he was so much more fun than Toby was. As usual, Toby just listened, trying not to make any more mental notes of this Michael Scott than he needed to. This was not a side of him that he particularly cared for.
Toby parked the car outside of Michael's condo. "Would you like me to walk you to the door?"
Michael grew suddenly quiet. "It's okay Michael. I don't have to. I just thought…"
"Do you know what it's like to be alone night after night with no one to come home to, no one to go to bed with, no one to cook dinner for?" Michael asked, startling Toby. Now he knew that Michael was really drunk.
"Yes Michael I do. I'm divorced, remember?" He knew he was setting himself up for a punchline, but he was still Toby, always trying to be helpful.
But this time Michael didn't bite. "No, its different. You had someone. I had Jan but that was different. You didn't know her like I did. I know you thought we had it all- great place, great looks, great sex- but let me tell you looks can be deceiving."
Toby looked away, unsure if he should be hearing this. Should Michael sober up surely he would hate him for knowing this much about himself.
"Jan was a scary scary woman, Toby. It was always about what she wanted. Never me. Never Michael. You know me, its all day long I'm busting my butt to give the customers and my staff what they want and then I had to come home and give give give some more. What about what I want, Toby? What about what I need?"
"I appreciate you sharing this w…"
"Cut the HR bullcrap and talk to me like a normal person. Or do you know how. Maybe that's why your wife left you," a frustrated Michael looked away. Right at the moment he needed something, anything to make him feel better, even if it came from Toby. If only he wasn't so… Toby.
"No, my wife left me for another man Michael."
Michael looked at him. "She did?"
"But I think that there is a woman out there who will appreciate you. You just have to keep looking."
Michael paused, leaving Toby wondering if he had helped or if he had, as usual, triggered Michael's temper.
"Yeah, keep looking. That's what I'm going to do. There's what, hundreds of single women in Scranton?"
Toby smiled. "Something like that."
"Keep on looking. Wow. Okay then. Well I'm going to go on in to bed. You okay, you need a place to crash?" It wasn't often he had overnight guests, and he jumped on any excuse he could find for one.
"Thanks, Michael, but I really should get going. See you on Monday," he smiled again.
"Jerk," Michael mumbled as he slammed the car door shut, leaving Toby to wonder what he had done wrong this time.