Well, I guess I officially suck. I am SO sorry for taking so long to post updates. It's not like me. At all. I had a death in the family and while we saw it coming for weeks (which is why I was so slow), it was pretty hard.

On a lighter note, I hope everyone enjoyed the Season 3 premiere of Glee. I definitely did. I hope more people enjoy Glee this season. I know lots of people complained last season. I personally liked last season, but that's just me. The Finchel cuteness last night just about killed me.

So, here's Chapter 7. Review if I should keep going.

Chapter 7: College Mess

Rachel didn't think it was possible, but college was getting worse and worse. Her five classes - Introduction to College Life, Introduction to College Performing Arts, Calculus, US History and Human Biology - were not the type of things she enjoyed. Her three academic classes had were solely graded on three exams, meaning if she failed one, she was pretty much messed up. Rachel had graduated third in her class at McKinley and was the top-ranked girl, GPAs only behind those of Artie and Mike, but apparently being on top at a small-town high school wasn't the same as being top of the heap at the third best university in the country. Rachel had gotten a full scholarship, but even that wasn't good enough. She was still just a little fish in a big sea.

Even worse than the academic situation, if possible, was the friends situation. She hadn't really made any friends on campus. All three of her suitemates had their own groups of friends who were constantly in the living room having fun. She secretly wished she had a group like that she belonged to. She was shy in classes, a first for her, and hadn't even gathered the courage to audition for the choir.

Her parents often asked her what had happened to the Rachel from high school. The confident, poised, driven Rachel, who would do anything to get what she wanted. Well, Rachel often wondered that herself.

Rachel's thoughts were interrupted when she heard a knock on her bedroom door. She went to the door and saw Rebecca there. "Rachel, sometimes I forget you're in this room," Rebecca said.

Rachel sighed and started fiddling with her hair.

"Anyway, I was wondering, want to come to a party with me tonight?" Rebecca asked.

"A party?" Rachel asked.

"Yeah, I noticed you're not really enjoying college. Maybe a party would help you loosen up a bit," Rebecca said.

Rachel smiled. "Yeah, that would be fun."

"Great!" Rebecca said. "We're leaving at 7."

Rachel watched Rebecca leave. She didn't want to go to this party, but it may be her only shot. She'd been talking with friends from high school during the first few days of college, but they'd all moved on with their lives and were making friends and loving college. She hadn't spoken with anyone but Finn in over two weeks. She and Finn continued to Skype every night. Finn had a hard time with football, but was forced to continue because that was how he could keep his scholarship. While waiting to leave for the party, Rachel logged into her e-mail and found an e-mail from an e-mail address she didn't recognize, with "Everyone back home misses you SOOOOOOOOO much!" as the subject line. She figured she'd open it.

I got your attention, didn't I?

Well, guess what? That's NOT TRUE at all. By the contrary, they are all SOOOOO glad you are gone! No one ever liked you to begin with. The glee kids, like everyone else in the world, knew you were nothing more than a pathetic needy baby, who clung to them because she couldn't find any friends (I wonder why?), and they were only nice to you because they were to nice to tell you they wanted you to get the hell away from them. And your family's only nice to you because they have to be.

And now you're off at college, with so many opportunities you never had at home. And are you taking advantage of any of those opportunities? No. I'm not there, but I know all you do there is mope around and whine about how much you hate it there. Well, nobody likes school. Suck it up. And don't come to anyone from home for comfort. You won't get it. Just leave your family and the glee club alone. NEVER call them again. NEVER e-mail them again. NEVER show up anywhere where they are again, and if you do BY COINCIDENCE, DON'T talk to them. Give them time to forget how unlucky they were to have you in their lives. If they're lucky, in a year they'll have forgotten you exist.

I'm sure you think I'm saying all this just to be mean. Well, I'm not.

Sincerely,

Anonymous

PS: I hope you're annoying a lot less people down there, though if anything, you're annoying more.

Rachel started crying as she read that e-mail. Was this really how people felt about her? She immediately called Finn and read him the e-mail.

"WHAT THE HELL?" Finn shouted. "Rachel, that's not true. You're a beautiful girl. I love you more than I can say. But Rachel - do you love me?"

Rachel was shocked. "Yes, more than I love myself."

"Really?" Finn asked.

Rachel smiled. "Yes."

Finn sighed. "I love you. I was so worried..."

"About what?" Rachel asked.

"That I'm just a backup," Finn said.

Rachel was shocked. "What made you think that?"

"Because you're at a school so far away when we could have gone together."

"That doesn't mean i don't love you"

"You don't love me?"

"I do."
"I've always felt like I came second to your Broadway dreams. I want us to last, but I'm not sure if I'm comfortable with this. I'm worried you'll get caught up in fame and I'll be forgotten."

Rachel didn't like where this was going. "You'll never be forgotten."

"How am I supposed to know you won't run off with some Broadway stud who's hotter and more talented than me? You think I don't remember your fling with Jesse? I do."

"Finn..."

"I love you, Rachel, but if you love me, you'll do anything to make me safe and happy. Our junior year in high school, you offered me an ultimatum: football or you. Now I'm offering you an ultimatum: Broadway or me." Finn hung up the phone. Feeling even more stressed, Rachel followed Rebecca to the car. Three of Rebecca's friends also followed. "Rachel, you're driving home," Rebecca said.

"Where are we going?" Rachel asked.

Rebecca's friend Kristen smirked. "NYU. The Omega Phi Beta party."

"What?" Rachel gasped.

"They have the best parties of any greek organization on campus," Rebecca's friend Chelsea said.

"Rebecca says you don't drink and you never do anything, so we figured you'd be a good driver," the last girl, named Mia, said.

Rachel sighed. She wasn't sure if she liked the idea of this, but it was something. She'd gotten into a fight with her boyfriend and her friends back home had forgotten her. This may be the one shot for fun.

The hour drive to NYU was dominated by Rebecca, Chelsea, Mia and Kristen talking about who'd had sex with the most people or downed the most beers at the last party.

When they arrived and got to the Omega Phi Beta house, there were already at least a hundred people there. Loud music was playing. Boys and girls were pulling their clothes off. Some people were even having sex in corners.

Rebecca and her friends ran into the party and began screaming as she watched her roommate gulp down a vodka and five beers. People at the party began throwing their beer bottles around; Rachel ducked as one narrowly missed her head. As Rebecca vomited, Rachel cleaned up her vomit. Eventually, a girl at the party passed out. Rachel wanted to get her roommate and her friends out of the trouble, so she tried to carry him back to the car before the police arrived. Chelsea and Mia both threw up on Rachel's shirt. By the time it was time to take Kristen to the car, Rachel eventually dragged her back. All four girls were gagging and vomitting on the way back to Princeton. When they got back to the Princeton, Rachel took Chelsea, Mia and Kristen to their dorms before dragging Rebecca to their room. Rachel was exhausted and just dumped Rebecca in the common room. Rebecca began running through the suite screaming and jumping on furniture. She shouted "Rachel, make me some food!"

Rachel sighed, went into her room and called her dads. What had become of her? She had no hope of fitting in at college. She'd lost her sense of belonging with people back home too. Did she have any purpose in the world anymore.

Rachel's dads didn't answer the phone. She just blurted out all her feelings. "I don't like college. At all. This just wasn't for me and I hate it so much I could never begin to describe it. They look at the students as numbers and base everything off tests, which doesn't do me a bit of good because even if I study, I can not do well on a test. This is such a big party school and it seems like all anyone wants to do is smoke and drink. My "friends" have turned into the people who try to lead me into trouble. I miss you so much. I hope things will get better here, and it may take some time, but right now, I hate it and all I want to do is leave. It's a huge waste of four years and the university's scholarship fund. Back home, I was known as the talented lead singer of New Directions who led the team to a National Championship, here, I'm known as the person who cries on random spots on campus about how much she hates it here. I'm considering not coming back next year."

Rachel was crying by the time she got off the phone. Since her dads hadn't answered, she tried calling her mom and left a similar message. Fearing Finn would break up with her, Rachel lay on her bed and felt tears coming to her eyes. Maybe what Quinn had feared would turn out to be true for Rachel. Maybe high school would be Rachel's peak.

As she tried to fall asleep, Rachel's phone rang. She looked at her phone and saw that it was Finn. Fearing what Finn would say, Rachel picked up the phone. "Hey, Finny."

Rachel could almost see Finn's half smile as he stammered. "I'm going to say something Quinn said to me once, but it's more true for us. Can we be in love again?"

"I'm sorry, Finn," Rachel said as a tear fell. "I shouldn't have snapped like that."

"This is my fault," Finn said. "I love you and I don't want to hold you back from your dreams."

"At this point, Finn, I don't know what career I want," Rachel said. "I do know one thing I want: for us to last."

Finn sighed. "I wish you were here."

Rachel sighed. "I wish I was there. Princeton isn't what I hoped."