Showering together probably wasn't the best idea.
I didn't think it would affect me like it did, and it affected Yusei too. I don't know whether it was a good thing or not, but in the shower he was his old self again, and I fell victim to him as he begged me to satisfy him. So I did.
I didn't even think if it would be okay with the kind of health he was in. It just sort of... happened. But I won't lie; it was great. And after we showered, we laid in bed and cuddled, like old times. We were almost normal again. But then he said something that really got to me.
"If I died right now, that would be okay. I would be just fine."
I couldn't help myself and started crying. He was alarmed and asked why. I lied and said that it was because I had missed being together and was so happy to be laying here with him, which, in my defense, was true.
It just hurt so much to hear him say those words, that he was so happy with me that he could die and it would be okay. I should have been glad to hear him say that, but then I thought, isn't there anything he thought was worth living for? Didn't he want to travel and explore and have fun and raise a family and grow old and live life for everything it had to offer? How could he be so content to just lay here with me and watch all his opportunities pass over him? If it were me, I'd... I'd...
Well, I'd want more from life. I'd want more time.
A crazy idea just came to me. Extremely crazy.
But Yusei's time is limited, so maybe it will be okay in an extreme situation like this.
Maybe I should call Jack and Crow and ask them what they think.