Important AN: So, I've been keeping the story six chapters ahead of what's published so that I can always publish roughly two chapters a week, no matter how lazy I'm being. The Friday before last, one of my students broke my thumb drive where I keep all my document backups. That was fine and all…until my computer froze up on the following Tuesday. After failing to restart, I took it to the "geniuses" at the Apple store…my hard drive is officially shot to hell (despite not having celebrated its first birthday). Everything I've EVER written (several unpublished fics, several megabytes of poetry, several unpublished novels, all of my pictures, all of my work, etc, etc, etc.) was on that laptop. I've sent the hard drive to a specialist in California. If they are able to get my files back, I'll continue publishing as normal. If not, I will rewrite the chapters that got lost (although they will likely be a significantly lower quality due to a crippled muse). Until then…several reviewers mentioned that they would like to see David's conversation with the rape hotline; your wish is my command.

Also, there have been numerous requests that I write a sequel to "Shadows of Tomorrow" (despite the incessant spamming that an anonymous Klaine-shipper keeps sending along the lines of "you're going to hell for this, blah, blah, blah…"). I've wanted to do a sequel for a while, but the muse was absent. Well, she's back and horny as ever, so I'll be doing the SoT sequel (as well as a PG prequel). The sequel and prequel will just be updates to the existing story (I hate when sequels to one-shots are their own stand-alone story. It makes it hard to find the updates).

I'll know the status of all my files within the week. If they're salvable, I'll let ya'll know!

BTW, I suck mega monkey-balls at prolonged conversations, so this will be more or less a dialogue chapter…

Also, (last AN, I promise!), I've never called a rape hotline, couldn't find anything on-line that tells you what happens when you call one, and I didn't feel like calling one for research purposes. If this looks like what you might find, awesome, if not, I tried my best!

Corresponding episode: Rumours

xoxoxo

Kurt and Dr. Amber knew the truth about everything. Quinn and the other doctors knew about his pregnancy. Mr. Schu knew there was something very wrong with him. The rest of the glee club knew he was sick. It was getting easier and easier to talk about what was going on in his life. And these were people he knew. What about talking to someone he never had to talk to ever again? Someone who didn't know him? Someone he would never even see? Someone who wouldn't so much as know his name if he didn't want them to? It was always so much easier to be anonymous. When he was younger, when he had first been given his own computer with Internet, it had been so easy to be whomever he wanted in chat rooms and forums. Anonymity had been his friend, was it possibly that it would continue to be his friend?

His parents weren't home; his dad was busy at work still, his mom was at her sister's. He was all alone for the next two hours, at least. If there was ever a time to call that number Kurt had given him, it was now. David held his cell phone in his hand, tilting it back and forth, praying that the bars disappeared so he would have an excuse not to call. Alas, his phone maintained three bars, more than enough to have a hassle-free conversation. After waiting a few more minutes, he started dialing in the number Kurt had given him weeks ago.

It rang for only a few moments before a voice answered on the other end of the line and announced her name (Jenna) and the name of the service he had called. It wasn't a wrong number; it was the same hotline Kurt had said it was.

David held his breath for a moment, not sure if he wanted to hang up or not. After reminding himself he could hang up anytime he wanted, he cleared his throat. "Ummm…Hi. My name's Daaaahhhh…Derrick. My friend gave me this number." Dave practically choked on his own name. It would be too real if this stranger were calling him by his real name.

"So, what would you like to talk about, Derrick?"

"A few weeks ago…no, a few months ago, now…I was at this party." David stopped for a moment, there was too much back-story; she wouldn't understand. He needed to start at the beginning. "You see, about a year ago, I realized that…I'm, I'm gay. There was this kid at school; he was open about being gay and everything. I wasn't. I'm not. I used to hassle him and everything; he had to transfer schools."

"Would you be more comfortable speaking with another homosexual? We have a few volunteers I could transfer you to…"

"Ummm…no. I'm pretty okay. You're fine….Unless you're uncomfortable with me being gay."

"No, I thought you'd just prefer someone who could empathize better. Although I kind of understand where you're coming from; I had a friend a few years ago that was real defensive about his sexuality. He would use "gay" and "fag" to describe anyone or anything he didn't like. I guess it's a common defense mechanism."

"He was your friend?"

"I use the term loosely." David smiled and was pretty certain he could hear a hint of amusement in Jenna's voice as well.

"Anyway. He transferred schools to get away from me. I was miserable without him; he was the only one who knew my secret and I had no one to talk to." David paused for a moment, letting her digest everything he was saying. "Anyway, I went to this gay party…not gay as in stupid or anything, gay as in…everyone there was gay…or bi. Well, while I was there, this guy got me drunk and…shit happened."

"I'm assuming this is 'shit' that you didn't want to happen?"

"No. He drugged me." David felt somewhat relieved that this wasn't like AA or anything. He didn't have to stand up, announce his name and that he was raped. The girl (woman?) on the other end of the line seemed to understand what happened without him specifically saying it. "The kid I used to hassle, K…evin, found me the next morning, passed out. He took me to the hospital."

"Is this the same friend that gave you our number?"

"He's the only one who really knows everything. He's been my savior. He wanted me to talk to someone. He thinks it'll help me."

"Do you think it's helping?"

"I…don't know yet." David thought about that for a moment. He didn't feel better, but he didn't really hurt to talk about it. Not like he thought it would.

"If it feels uncomfortable, we can back off a bit and talk about something else, okay?"

"Yeah…that sounds fine. So, after everything happened, Kevin came back to school to help me through this, even though no one else really knows. I lost all my old friends. I couldn't stand being around them; they were loud and touchy. I can't deal with that, not after everything that happened."

"What do you mean by 'touchy'?"

"Well, pushing each other around, slapping each other's backs. Occasional bro-hugs. Stuff like that."

"Okay. I'm not a guy, so I wasn't entirely sure what you meant."

"That's okay. So…I left the football team, too. The locker room still freaks me out. It always has to some degree. But Kevin, back in November, I forced myself on him. Just a kiss. He says it's no big deal, but it was his first kiss and everything."

"I can see why the locker room would make you uncomfortable."

"Yeah…I kinda feel like I got my karma." David swiped his fingernails over his teeth, cleaning out the gunk under them. "A few weeks after the party, I started getting sick. Kurt-KEVIN!, Kevin made me go see a doctor. We found out I have a rare genetic defect that makes me…I'm not like…"

"It's okay, Derrick, I don't judge."

"I'm not strictly a guy. Apparently I'm also a fucking woman." David could feel himself getting hot. It was getting harder to talk. "I have a uterus and everything a chick has, but also everything a dude has."

"O…kay…"

"The guy at the party…he got me pregnant." David started speaking faster; he didn't want to be able to hear any of Jenna's responses on the other end of the line during a pause. "My parents don't know anything. Anything. They don't know I'm gay, that I'm a hermaphrodite, that I was raped, that I'm pregnant. They think I'm on drugs-Well, I am, but they're all for the pregnancy and my hormones and my morning sickness and…it really sucks."

There was a moment of silence on the phone. David worried for a moment that Jenna had hung up. But then he could hear her take a breath. "Okay…that is a lot for two teenagers to be dealing with."

"I know."

"So, I'm assuming you're seeing a doctor since you're on pregnancy drugs and everything?"

"Yeah…I don't like talking to them, though. They don't know about the rape. They think Kurt's the dad." David felt so weak from pouring out his soul that he didn't even notice he had said Kurt's name again.

"Does Kurt know? I mean does he know that the doctors think he's the dad?"

"Yeah. He's been going along with it. He told a girl at school…this chick that was pregnant last year…that I'm pregnant and that he's the dad."

"How do you feel about that?

"I…like Kurt a lot. I've always liked him. I wish he were the dad."

"What's your relationship with Kurt like?"

"We're dating…kind of. We never really 'go out' and, I'm not comfortable with a lot of touching, but we kiss sometimes. And we hold hands a lot."

"So both of you are comfortable with Kurt playing the part of the father?"

"It's…easier for me. I can pretend that he is the dad and try to forget that the real one exists. And…I think Kurt just wants to be loved. I…fucking worship him and I think he knows that. If he plays the part of Daddy, he's got a little makeshift family. I know that this isn't the healthiest relationship possible and I'm not deluded enough to think it'll last…hell, I keep waiting for him to tell me he can't deal with my shit anymore. But, I think I'll ride this wave as long as possible. I really love him."

"I'm not a relationship counselor, but just so long as you're aware it probably won't last. So, how are you feeling about everything else?"

"It's... weird. Nothing really physically changes day-to-day, but sometimes I wake up and just want to cry. Or I feel numb. Or I feel fine and then…BAM…everything just starts crashing down around me."

"Sounds like depression…or anxiety. Although it could also be hormones. Have you considered talking to a professional psychologist? I'm sure your doctor could find you one who can deal with your… unique issues."

"I'm on more than enough drugs right now." David sat down on the edge of his bed. He hadn't even realized he had been pacing the entire conversation. "I think…just talking is helping." David stifled a melancholy laugh, "Guess it's the chick in me."

"I'm glad talking about it is working for you."

"Yeah…thanks for listening. I think…I'm just about talked-out for tonight. If I call back, will I get you or someone else?"

"You'll get whoever picks up first, though you can always request me by name, if you're more comfortable."

David nodded to himself. "Yeah, thanks. I think…I think things might get better, you know?"

"In my experience, they always do."

"Thanks Jenna."

"You're welcome, Derrick."

David frowned for a moment. Who the hell was Derrick? Oh, yeah…"My name's Dave, I'll talk to you later."

"Bye, Dave."

He chuckled to himself. "Bye."