Chapter 5

Oghren was giving the soldiers a final briefing.

Lady Cousland had taken a small contingent to try to retake Amaranthine, what was left of it, from the invading darkspawn. It sounded like a suicide mission to Davyd, but it was just like her to take on the impossible. He prayed for her victory and safety.

The Vigil had its own problems, however. Another large darkspawn army was approaching and would besiege the fortress within mere hours. The Vigil's garrison was preparing for battle and, from all indicators, it was a hopeless one.

Lady Cousland had left Oghren in command of the fortress in her absence. Davyd had gone to him and volunteered to fight. He hadn't carried arms in over five years, but he just couldn't countenance the idea that he wouldn't stand his ground against the darkspawn if they came. Not after everything they'd done. A small, very angry, part of him was looking forward to butchering those bastards.

Oghren had accepted Davyd's offer. Davyd had attended the final briefing like the rest of the garrison.

"MacDougal," Oghren said. "You were a sergeant at one time?"

"Yes," Davyd said.

"Alright, I want you in command of the militia stationed inside the keep," Oghren said.

"Understood," Davyd said. He was not happy about this assignment. The "militia" was every young boy, old man, and untrained castle staffer. If it got to room-to-room fighting inside the keep, the militia would evaporate in minutes. The only good thing about the situation was that Master Wade had been making arms and armor day and night for weeks now. At least the militia would have quality equipment and weapons.

"There should be plenty of swords, shields, and armor in the armory," Oghren said, echoing Davyd's thoughts. "Draw what you need to equip your men."

"Yes, my lord," Davyd replied.

Oghren finished up handing out assignments, the last given to Velanna.

"I want you on outer wall's upper level, with the archers," Oghren told her.

Velanna nodded.

"Alright, get to it! The sodding darkspawn aren't going to kill themselves!" Oghren said.

The wall, Davyd thought. The first place to fall if the darkspawn breach the gate. That's where Velanna will be.

His breathe caught in his throat. His heart hammered in his ears. What's wrong with me, he thought. Am I having a heart attack?

Davyd quickly left the throne room, and retreated to his quarters.

"Davyd?" Velanna said. He hadn't even noticed her open his door. "Are you OK?"

"I don't know, I..." he swallowed heavily. "I don't want you on that wall."

"It's my place," she said.

"I don't care," Davyd hissed. "It's too dangerous."
"What, do you think I can't handle myself, shem?" she snapped.

"I don't think that," he said, exasperated.

"Then what's your problem with me being on the wall?" she demanded.

"I can't do this," Davyd replied.

"Do what?"

"Nothing," Davyd replied.

"It doesn't look like nothing to me," she pressed.

"There's no reason to talk about it."

"Damn you!" she cursed. "What can't you do?"

"I can't lose you, Velanna," Davyd grated out.

"Lose me? What makes you think I belong to anyone, much less a shem?"

"I didn't mean it that way," Davyd said.

"Then just what did you mean!" she half shouted.

"I CAN'T LOSE YOU BECAUSE I LOVE YOU TOO MUCH!" Davyd shouted at her.

Her eyes went wide as saucers, staring at him. Maker's breathe, I'm insane. 'Incinerated by Invincible, Badass Dalish Mage'. I suppose that will make as good an epitaph as any, he thought with surprising calm.

"Err...maybe I should-"

Before he could finish, Velanna snaked an arm around him, and forcefully pulled him down to her. Their lips met with a lot of force, and they kissed in a rushed, fairly rough fashion.

She pulled back, arms still around him, eyes still wide. "I cannot believe I just did that," she said.

"With the Maker as my witness, neither can I," Davyd replied.

But they didn't let go of each other. Davyd gently placed a hand on her face. She went for another rough kiss, but he stopped her, gently. He placed his other hand behind her head, and guided her gently towards him.

He kissed her softly, almost cautiously at first. The kiss deepened after a moment. Velanna sighed a pleased little sigh.

Davyd had never been with an elven woman before. It was...different, yet familiar. The taste was different, slightly spicy. Her skin was incredibly soft and silken, nearly intoxicating to the touch. The touch of a woman ignited a flame of desire in him that he'd long since thought gone. He held her close.

So, this is why they say 'Once you go to the Dales, everything else pales.'

His heart rate slowed a bit since it was apparent she wasn't going to burn him alive. They both came up for air. "If we don't get through this alive..." she began, but her voice broke. She tried again. "If we don't get through this, I want you to know. I love you too."

Davyd embraced her.

"Just...stay with me for a while," she said, sounding vulnerable.

"I will," he whispered.

They were out of time.

Davyd and Velanna had found comfort in each other's arms on the eve of battle, but the enemy was approaching, and they had to prepare.

"Did you really mean it?" she asked. "When you said you loved me?"

Davyd searched his heart. He had blurted the statement out in the heat of the moment, but he knew without a doubt it had been the raw, unvarnished truth. He was still shocked by that. "Yes," he whispered.

"Are you sure you should give your heart to me?" she asked. "I am rightly labeled a murderer now, exiled from my clan, and until recently, full of hatred for your entire race. I am not someone you should want to be bound to."

"What I should want and what I do want are two entirely different things," he said. "I don't see you as any of those things, anyway."

"But I am guilty," she persisted.

"You can't go on hating yourself forever," Davyd said. "Sometimes we have to forgive ourselves and move on."

"I don't know if I can do that," she said.

"It doesn't matter if you do or don't," Davyd said. "I still love you."

She smiled. "I love you too."

They held each other a few moments more, before she sighed resignedly. "It's time."

Reluctantly, Davyd stood, and started towards his armoire. He still had his old set of studded leather armor from when he'd been a soldier. It'd been years since he wore it, but he was gratified that he was still the same size as he was then, and that the armor would still fit. He started to don the tunic, when Velanna stopped him. "Wait," she said. "Give me the tunic."

Davyd did as she said, wondering what she was up to. She unbuttoned the tunic, and motioned for him to place his arms through the sleeves. He did as she bade. She came around in front of him, and carefully buttoned it completely. She motioned for him to sit on the foot of the bed. She continued to dress him in his battle gear, attaching his leather armor pieces to trousers next, then his boots, and finally the gauntlets. She walked towards the small table where his two handed sword laid, which he had recently sharpened, oiled, and reconditioned for combat that it had not seen in years. She sheathed the great blade, and had Davyd stand up so she could secure it to its mount on his back.

I could get used to this, he mused wryly.

She stood on her tip toes and kissed him gently. "Give me a minute."

She quickly donned a set of leather armored gloves and boots, the only protective pieces of gear she wore in conjunction with her quite unarmored Keeper's skins. She retrieved her staff and turned towards him with a serious look. "I know you don't want me on the wall," she said gently. "But it is my duty. You know this."

"I know," he said. Davyd turned and went to his knees at the foot of his bed in prayer. "Maker help me. I've had two taken from me. Please, not again. Don't take her from me."

"So let it be," Velanna whispered.

Davyd looked over his shoulder at her, questioningly.

"I might still hold to the old Elven faith, but my people owe much to Andraste," she said. "It was her faith in a just Maker that gave her the will to fight for freedom for everyone, even us."

"Velanna, promise me you will come back to me alive," Davyd said.

"I will," she promised. "I love you."

"I love you too," Davyd said.

She left his room. She had made her promise in good faith, but they both knew it was likely she wouldn't be able to keep it.