It was a sunshiny day outside and this made Reid particularly gay. He decided that because the sky was blue, he was going to play hooky from work today! He opened the front door, walked outside and took a deep breath of fresh air. Oh, the possibilities.

"Oh, Mr. Sun, Sun, Mr. Golden Sun, please shine down on me!" he sang. "Did you know it takes the sun's light eight minutes to reach us on earth?" he asked Mrs. Sparrow, who was perched in a nearby dogwood tree.

"Kaw, kaw!" Mrs. Sparrow replied before flying away.

Reid sighed. He always went to work; he really didn't know what to do with himself when he wasn't there. All he knew was that the sun was shining and it was making him a bit punch-drunk. He skipped clumsily down his driveway and began leaping down the road without much coordination. Rather suddenly, he was stopped by a police officer.

"Hey, kid, have you been drinking?"

"N-n-n-no," Reid squeaked, covering his mouth and giving the officer a deer-in-the-headlights look.

The officer glared at him suspiciously. "And shouldn't you be in school?"

"N-no, I graduated when I was twelve. Well, technically, I should be at work. I work for the FBI. Here, let me show you my badge."

"Don't move!" the officer yelled, drawing his gun. "Keep your hands where I can see them!"

Reid slowly and nervously raised his hands above his head. "I think there's a misunderstanding…" he began.

"That's what they all say," the officer replied as he tackled Reid's arms behind his back and handcuffed him.

Reid was unceremoniously thrown into the back of the car. The officer sat in the driver's seat and helped himself to a jelly donut.

"I need your parent's number," he demanded.

"Um…" Reid said. Fortunately, he had Gideon's number memorized. "1-800-CAUGHT-U," he recited.

The officer snarled. "A real number!"

Reid started to cry. "But Mommy's in the sanitarium and I don't want to trigger an episode! Please, Mr. Officer!"

The officer gave Reid an odd look before popping the remainder of the donut into his mouth. "Then give me your daddy's real number, kid."

Reid replied with Morgan's cell number, which he also had memorized, of course.

Morgan had given him it the day they'd studied physics together. He'd said for Reid to call him if he ever wanted "Lesson Two." This wasn't lesson two, but Reid definitely needed some help. The officer dialed the number.

"Morgan." Reid heard his colleague's voice boom from the earpiece.

"Sir, this is the police. Your son was caught skipping school –"

"My son? I don't –"

"He's right here, if you'd like to talk to him." The officer held the phone up to Reid's ear.

"Um…hello, D-daddy."

"Reid?" Morgan asked incredulously. Reid could hear him attempting to muffle his laughter from the other side of the phone.

"Yes, Mor- I mean Daddy," Reid replied through clenched teeth. "I need you to come pick me up and take me to wor- I mean school."

"I don't know, son." Morgan seemed to be catching on. "You were skipping, right? Are you sure you're not getting exactly what you deserve?"

"I-I can't make it in prison! I don't want to do physics with anyone but you!"

Morgan sighed. "Alright, Reid. Let me talk to that officer again."

Reid nodded to the officer and the old pig put the receiver back to his snout. "Y'ello. Yes. Yes, okay." He hung up. "Alright, Spence…"

Reid choked.

"Your daddy wants me to give you a ride to his work so he can deal with you."

"O-okay," Reid said, not sure if he felt dread or excitement. "Can you turn on the siren, just for fun?"

Reid and the officer arrived at the BAU building just a couple minutes later. Reid was suffering some pretty bad whiplash and could hardly walk straight. The officer took the cuffs off the young man and led him inside by the scruff of the neck.

"Reid, you're late," Hotch said dangerously, and then stopped in his tracks. "What the hell?"

"Who are you?" Reid whimpered. "Where's Daddy?"

Just then, Morgan appeared on the stairs. "Spence!" he shouted, descending the steps three at a time. "You are in deep shit."

"It's always the adopted ones," the officer commented, shaking his head to himself.

Deciding that he did not want to know what type of kinky role-playing his agents were up to, Hotch hurried back to his office to cleanse his mind. As soon as Morgan grabbed hold of Reid's ear, the officer tipped his hat and left the building. Morgan and Reid just stood there for a moment, listening to the sound of receding siren.

Then, Morgan sprung into action. "Come on, young man. You need a spanking."

With that, Morgan flung the stick-thin figure that was Reid over his shoulder and hauled Reid off to his office. Hotch, who was occupying the office across the hall, promptly inserted earplugs.