Seconds to minutes. Minutes to hours. Hours to days. And before long, decades have passed. But those few seconds of watching someone whom she had fallen for, someone who always has a smile upon her face no matter what crumble beneath the weight of everything that was hidden to even those closest to her, felt like an eternity. Infinite timelines passed for the two women sitting across from one another as they somberly tasted the sweet candies before them, though neither one addressed them. Time continued to pass and the silence grew louder, deafening even the sounds of the world continuing around them. Eventually, it became too much for Elsa to bear and she slowly rose from her seat, outstretching her hand to Anna, who focused solely on the candy she was eating until a pale hand entered her periphery.

"I, uh, I was hoping we could continue with our tour?" Elsa's tone was soft and meek, sheltering away as if afraid. And though she wouldn't admit it to anyone else, she was more than afraid. She was terrified. She was standing upon the precipice of a ravine carved by her actions and she awaited an answer in order to determine whether she fell to the pit or soared to the other side.

Copper hair carefully turned away from the sky, revealing Anna's face. And even at this distance, Elsa took in every detail as she worried it could be the last time she does. Her eyes scanned each freckle that rested upon the young woman's face, dusting her cheeks and the small bridge of her buttonlike nose. Every dip and curve of her face, the image of soft, bowlike lips which glistened in the sunlight, and eyes of ocean that drew her in were all captured in time by her. She could only hope it wasn't the last time she'd see this sight, but luck had never been on her side.

"Actually…I think we should head back. It's getting late and I need to study," Anna spoke. Her lips were curved up in an attempt to make it seem sincere and as though nothing was wrong, but the inflections of her voice were wrong and sounded like the glee and joy had been drained from her.

"Sure."

Anna glanced at Elsa's pale outstretched hand, questioning with herself whether or not to take it and rise from her seat or to ignore it and risk the chance at romance. It wasn't long before the pale hand was covered and gripped by a hand lightly tanned and as warmth met cold, cerulean eyes met turquoise with a fondness before fading to silent sorrow. Anna slowly rose from her seat with Elsa's help as they stared at each other for a second that stretched to eternity, both unaware of the yearning deep within one another to reach out to the other, to start a new chapter in both their lives. Time though is unforgiving, and the eternity they felt as they lost each other in the depths of the other's eyes faded and Anna's hand slipped away from Elsa's, leaving a void of warmth in its place.

Elsa watched as Anna turned away, collecting her stack of candy into her arms. Not a word was spoken between the two as Elsa did the same, scooping her portioned sweets into the shopping bag given by the store before she turned, and no longer was Anna nearby.

Fear gripped her as she spun about surveying for any sign of copper hair. It wasn't long before she began to walk around, searching for Anna. And though it didn't take long, the sight she saw stung worse than she could have imagined possible.

Inside the car, Anna was staring down at her lap somberly unwrapping a piece of candy and slowly drawing it towards her mouth before stopping, staring at the presumably chocolate candy and lowering it back down into its wrapper. Her joyous nature was gone and Elsa could think of no reason why beyond what had transpired just a few minutes prior. And as much as she wished she could fix the mistake she had made, she understood that it was better to just let it go and let the situation naturally work itself out. So, she walked to the driver's side and opened the door, watching as Anna glanced over for a fraction of a moment before turning towards her window and resting her elbow on the lip of the door, placing her head upon her hand.

Before long, Elsa had entered the vehicle and started it, letting nothing but the soft purr of the engine sound off into the stillness of the interior as she drove away from the candy shop and back to the dorm hall.

Northuldra Sweets was supposed to help clear the air between us, yet now it feels like a barrier has found residence instead. Why isn't it fair? Why do I keep barricading myself in palaces of ice where no one can reach me, rather than allow those I want close to me in? I want to build connections and romance, not shelter myself. But this is what I know how to do. This is what I'm good at and what I was raised to become; a heartless, loveless, husk of a woman meant to throw myself at any man who will lead me and my family to a higher status. I don't want that. I don't want any of that. It's not who I am. It's not who I want to be. But who do I want to be?

Elsa let her thoughts run rampant as she drove, dreading the sight of the dorm hall as she steadily neared closer and closer. And now as she pulled ever closer, two turns away from the parking lot which they had left not an hour earlier, she began to reflect and focus on the question that was plaguing her.

I know who I want to be. I want to be someone worthy of love forged outside of any means of social or economical reasoning. I want to be someone who goes on dates with the woman I choose, not forced into a romance with a man chosen for me. I want to share my thoughts, my feelings, and my heart with her. I want to be with Anna, to feel her hold me and talk with me and do all sorts of carefree activities with me. I want Anna.

As the car came to rest within its typical parking space, Elsa turned towards Anna, her heart surging with emotion. Anna turned to click her buckle to unlatch herself and looked up at Elsa once more before leaving the vehicle, their eyes locked for what felt like the hundredth time that day. But this time, something was different. The sorrow once at the forefront of all other emotions was locked away, replaced by anxiety, nervousness, and hope.

"Anna, I…" Elsa's voice dropped and her breathing began to increase as the pair continued to lock eyes.

"Thank you for the candy, Elsa. Maybe we can try this tour some other time," Anna spoke. Her voice was soft and the pain behind it still hadn't left. And before Elsa could respond or control her anxiety long enough to speak what she wished to say, the car door had opened and a flash of copper hair leaving as the door shut was all she saw. The world felt as though it was falling away into a vortex that was threatening to inhale her with each step Anna took away from the vehicle. And as much as Elsa wanted to kick and scream, clawing her way to tell Anna what she felt, the pull had her held in place, and any words she spoke were taken away into that abyss. She had no fight.

As soon as Anna had entered the building, Elsa's head slowly came to rest upon the dark leather of the steering wheel with tears that she didn't even know were building in her eyes dripping and glistening in the sunlight. It felt like hours that she stayed there, sobbing to herself about everything she had done wrong before no more tears left their ducts, leaving only their watery trails along her cheeks. She did her best to compose herself as she finally turned off her Prius and opened her journal, beginning to write upon it once more.

August 25, 20XX

There are moments in life when it seems like the sun shines brighter than normal. Moments where it seems as though life is counting on you to win and has your best interests in mind. Moments where, no matter what may come, nothing can dampen your spirits or ruin your day. These days are lies.

Today was supposed to be one of these days where the sun was shining brighter than ever and everything seemed perfect, but it wasn't. When I started the day, I was excited to see her again. Excited to see her auburn hair flowing in the gentle breeze or bouncing around as she excitedly points out different spots on campus. Her enthusiasm and personality draw out a side of me that I hadn't seen for many years, a side I thought I had lost. She is always so cheerful and excited about everything and it made me want to pull her hand into mine, just so I could show her all these exciting things and get to experience them with her.

I thought that if I did that, then perhaps I would get the chance to pull her body close to mine, her warmth seeping through my chilliness as we lie under the stars, talking about our futures. I imagined that our bodies would fit together like pieces of a puzzle and there would be no question that we would be in each other's futures. Hope led me to believe that if that came, then surely I would be able to plant a kiss upon each freckle that dusted her face, save for one kiss. A kiss that would ultimately land upon her soft lips that taste of strawberry and chocolate.

But all that was, is a daydream. A figment of my imagination that is surely doomed to never come to fruition.

I ruined my own chances today. It started out by me saying some really cheesy line about how life isn't about price, but longevity, to which she began to cry and wipe away tears. She claimed she had been through a lot within the past few weeks and it worries me because I don't know how to help her. We continued with our day anyways, stopping at Northuldra Sweets for a quick pick-me-up, though everything fell to ruin here.

As we were shopping, we were talking to each other and I got lost in her eyes. I felt like I was being pulled in, but I had to stop myself before I did something that would ruin my chances with her. Except, some kid—whose mother should have been watching them—bumped into Anna and pushed our lips together. It was a kiss I wanted yet dreaded because her lips were how I imagined them, only softer and sweeter. I didn't want the kiss though, since we were just getting started on a friendship, not even a romance yet.

The worst part was when I told her we should forget about it entirely, to which her heart broke. I had become a monster and now I fear I lost my chances with her entirely. The only thing I can say now is that I'm sorry Anna. I never wanted to hurt you, I just didn't want to rush into anything, especially since I wasn't sure how you felt. I am sorry, please forgive me.

As she wrote, her heart pounded in her chest, her hand flying across the page as though she was drafting a constitution. The words poured out of her as though there wasn't any time left to think, no time to worry about anyone except the feelings held for Anna. Even after pages filled with writing and she had no words left to say, she drew. She sketched the details of Anna's face, capturing a likeness and beauty she had been able to draw before. Over and over she drew Anna, wanting to remember her forever, even if it was only through the five pages she drew upon.

By the time she glanced out at the world around her, the time had passed and the sun was setting beyond the horizon, turning the sky a vibrant shade of orange that Elsa thought matched the color of Anna's hair. She turned back to the pages, raising her pencil with a wish to draw her once more, but inspiration and emotions are fickle beings that come and go with a whim, and Elsa's had left for the night. So, doing what she should have done hours prior, she closed the journal and opened the door of the Prius, stepping out into the cool air as she began to head back to her own dorm.

You are a fool. You allowed yourself to think that she could like you. You were so confident in it too, but then you kissed her and now she wants to forget. Pitiful, isn't it?

The words stung to listen to, but she couldn't escape their grasp, they were a part of her, and yet even then, she was powerless to silence them. All she wanted was a good day. A day where she didn't have to fight with herself about why she was terrible. She just wanted a moment where she could truly be happy. A moment she could share with the woman she was falling for, but that moment passed and the day slipped away from her.

Each step she took away from the vehicle tore away at her, berating her and beating her down. She knew they wouldn't stop until she slept, but even then the voices found their way into her dreams, showing her harsh truths that she didn't want to face. And she wouldn't have to face them yet, only hear them. So she took each step, bringing herself closer and closer to her dorm until finally she reached it and she swiped the card on the door.

Beep-beep! The light flashed red. Grumbling, she tried again.

Beep-beep! Red once more.

"Come on you stupid thing!" With growing frustration, she muttered as she swiped the card again.

Beep-beep! Red. Again.

Beep-beep! Red.

Beep-beep! Red.

Beep-beep! Once more.

Beep-beep! The light was red, but her vision was blurred. Her anger had reached its tipping point, but it wasn't vengeful anger that left her. It was quiet, saddened anger at oneself. And with it came tears she didn't know were building.

"Goddammit! Why can't I do anything right today?!" She called out, her voice choking as her throat clenched and she wanted to hit something. Clenching her fist, she raised it to strike the door, the wall, something. But she couldn't do it. Instead, she felt sorrow wash over her and she dropped to the floor, huddled against the door as she brought her knees to her chest and let herself drown in the sorrow, allowing her emotions to burst forth. With bleary eyes, she glanced at the stack of candy she had been carrying with her and she reached out to the piece resting on top. It was a licorice candy she had been meaning to try for some time but had never gotten around to it, but now she was going to, and instead of a blissful taste, she hoped it could help take away the pain she felt. As she carefully brought the candy to her quivering lips, a tender voice called out to her.

"Anna? Oh my God. What happened?" As Anna glanced up, she saw her roommate, Rapunzel dressed in a form-fitting pink dress with frills along the sleeves and chest as her hair was done up in a braid. Her expression was softened with concern for her friend as she glanced at Anna curled up against the door to their dorm. Flynn, who was standing to her right also showed concern for her. Rapunzel turned towards him, worry plastered upon her face. "Um, Flynn-"

"No worries. We have plenty of time for dates. For now, take care of her, okay?" Anna could tell it wasn't easy for him to throw away whatever plans they had for their date that night, but she could tell he truly meant what he said.

"I will. And I promise I'll make it up to you. I promise, and when I promise something-"

"-You never break that promise. I know. And I believe you. Now go, take care of Anna, it seems as though she really needs a shoulder to cry on. And if what you say about her mother is true, you're all she has left, Rapunzel. She needs you."

As he turned to return to whichever dorm he was staying in, Rapunzel stopped him before parting with a chaste kiss as her thoughts were slowly filled with ways to try and help her roommate.

"I'll make sure that, when I make it up to you, it'll be better than you ever could expect," She whispered. But just as quickly as she left a kiss on Flynn's lips, she turned back to Anna, helping her get to her feet and enter the dorm. Anna knew that Rapunzel would always be there to help her, no matter what, but when the door opened and Rapunzel turned to look at her, she broke. It was as if she were no longer in control of her own actions, let alone her own emotions and she pulled her best friend into a heaving and sobbing hug.

"Shhh…it's okay." Rapunzel soothed, rubbing her hand along Anna's back.

"I ruined it," Anna choked out.

"You didn't ruin anything, I promise."

"You don't know that. You don't know what happened. I ruined everything."

"No, Anna, you didn't. But if you're so sure, why don't we sit down and I'll fix us something to drink? Then you tell me exactly what happened, spare no details." As she spoke, she lead the crying girl to their shared couch, setting her down gently as she passed her some tissues and a nearby throw pillow to hold on to. Carefully, and continuing to watch Anna, she walked over to the kitchen before pulling out all the ingredients to make hot chocolate, Anna's favorite. It didn't take long to make the drinks, but every minute that passed, spurred a fear deep within Rapunzel for her best friend. She knew the last thing Anna needed at the moment was more pain, but it seemed like life wanted to keep her down.

"So, what happened?" She questioned as she handed Anna a glass, sitting down next to her as she did so.

"We kissed, that's what happened."

"What?! How is that a bad thing? Surely she wasn't that bad, was she?"

"It's not like that, Punz. It was amazing, and I thought it was going to lead us into something beyond what we have."

"But?"

"But when we pulled away, she was shocked, almost as if she were frozen over. She hardly spoke, except to the cashier. And when we sat down to split the candy and talk about what happened, she said she wanted to forget it ever happened. I wanted to tell her that I didn't mind it, that I actually enjoyed it…but she wanted to forget. What did I do wrong, Rapunzel? Why can't life just let me have a happy ending for once?" Her words began to slur and choke as her throat tightened and her chest heaved while her eyes purged the tears and sorrow that was building inside. As Rapunzel's arms closed around her back, the final breadth of restraint broke within her and she began to sob into the crook of her roommate's neck. "What did I do wrong?" she murmured repeatedly, as though it were a chant that would give her the answer she was looking for.

"Nothing. You did nothing wrong."

"Then why does it hurt so bad?! I feel like my heart has been ripped from my chest."

"Your heart is fine, but since you left home, life has been hard on you. Your mom is sick and it burdens you, deeply, I know. And this pain you feel? It'll only get worse if you continue to let it. And though I wish I could say it'll get easier, the truth is: it won't. Life will beat you and hurt you, but you need to break it down and make it less of a burden. Your next breath, next step, next choice, all of these are things you can choose and ones you can take because you know what is in front of you.

"Listen, Anna, I know you really like Elsa. Far more than I have ever seen you like someone. But the thing is, you need to brace yourself for the worst because you'll never know what is coming. I'll talk with her though, to find out what really happened, because she doesn't seem the type to just write off someone so harshly, no matter how much she likes to appear cold and calloused. So, breathe, okay? Can you do that for me, no more crying?"

Anna sniffled, bringing the back of her hand up to her nose and wiping away the snot, "Yeah, I think I can do that. But I'm afraid, Punz. And I don't know how to stop being afraid."

"You don't."

"Then how do I-"

"It'll never be that simple, and while I am chock full of wisdom, I am not omniscient. So I don't have answers to everything. But what I can say, is to look for the good that comes from that fear. There is always something. Now, instead of exhausting my wisdom, why don't we watch Atlantis? I know it is your favorite movie and used to always calm you down." Anna nodded in reply, clutching her hot chocolate as though it was the final good thing that could happen in her life.

Rapunzel was right, the movie did help her calm down, but she couldn't focus. Every thought she had, every question she asked, was about Elsa. Her mind reeled and wouldn't stop, no matter how hard she tried, and before she knew it, Atlantis had ended and Rapunzel was sound asleep, resting her head upon Anna's shoulder.

This really should have been the other way around. I should have been the one to fall asleep on Punz's shoulder, not her on mine. I can't blame her though, she always did find the movie boring…which should be a crime because Atlantis is awesome! She thought as she carefully extracted herself from the couch, lying Rapunzel down upon the cushions before turning and heading to her own bed.

As she entered the room, she didn't bother to turn the light on, letting the natural light of a slow-rising moon illuminate it for her. The walls were barren, with no posters or photos hanging anywhere, the soft, dark blue bedspread was a mess, and the desk was just as empty as the walls. No personality shone in the light and Anna stood, saddened by the sight. In the entire time she had been at the college, she made no attempt at making it feel like home. She didn't want to. Her mother was her home and she was fading away from Anna like sand between her fingers. But that was no excuse, her mother had told her to make a life for herself and here she was, drowning in her sorrow and refusing to take the next step and do what her mother told her. That step scared her.

She wanted to try, but fear had its dark, tendril-like fingers wrapped around her, suffocating her. There wasn't an escape she could see, but she understood that she needed to. But no matter how hard she tried to conjure that escape, her thoughts tormented her with distortions in which she couldn't determine the lies from the truths.

Without knowing, she dredged herself over to her bed, sitting down upon it before lying on her side. It was as though she had lost control of herself and was now blind to everything surrounding her. So perhaps it was a good thing when her exhaustion won the race between all emotions and she found herself visiting the realm of Morpheus, begging for a good dream. A dream that wouldn't wake her in a cold sweat. A dream where she found bliss for one of the few times within the past couple of weeks.

Dark, umber braided rope swayed in the gentle breeze, draped over the barren, twisted and jagged branch of a dying oak tree. Its carcass stuck out against the grey, clouded sky that blotted the sun as if trying to emulate the works of Piet Mondrian.

Anna watched a crowd begin to form around the base of the tree, torches lit and raised in hand, lighting the scene before a crime. She wasn't able to move, only watch as the crowd shuffled around her, leaving her feeling cramped and crowded, but completely able to see the sight of a woman shuffling up to the rope before she stuck her head through its tied loop. The woman stood upon a stool that wobbled and wriggled with each movement she took. Soon, another woman came forward dressed in a black gown reminiscent of a judge's and she raised her hand to silence the crowd. She began to speak, but Anna couldn't understand any of it. It was like white noise streaming from a face that had no features. Yet the crowd cheered and hollered.

Slowly the woman walked over to the other who was preparing to be hanged and time seemed to freeze as the woman turned towards Anna. No, she had turned towards the judge, yet where the judge once stood, Anna had now taken her place. She tried to move, to escape, but she couldn't, she was stuck in a body which listened not to Anna, but to the actions of those who cheered it on.

No. Anna thought, fighting like hell to resist each step towards the woman in the noose, but it was no use. Finally, Anna stopped moving forward and looked upon the face of the woman who was doomed to die, ready to hear her final words. And the face, once formless and without definition, shifted and morphed until the woman who looked down upon Anna was none else than her mother.

"Where am I? I…I don't recall," She asked. Anna looked upon her doomed mother, who did not understand what was going on. There was no fear upon her face, but absence. She was lost within her illness and now she stood before a crowd of faceless millions, standing on the precipice of death, and she was lost. Anna wanted to cry out to her mother, let her know what was going on, get some answers, and hopefully get out of the situation, hand in hand. But one soul's anguish gets lost in a sea of millions united for a purpose beyond the understanding of anyone.

Anna continued to watch her mother glance about the crowd, looking for something, before she closed her eyes and spoke once again. Though her words were soft and towards herself, they were still heard by her daughter.

"It'll hurt her, I know. But I'm her mother and I want her to be unburdened by this. I want her to remember the woman I used to be, the mother who would take her to get ice cream in the summer, the mother who took care of her when she was sick, the mother who gave her freedom and only asked for her love in return. That's who she should remember, not a husk who no longer remembers her. I love you, Anna, more than you realize, and now all I ask is that you remember me as the woman who remembered everything and did as much as she could for you even when she began to forget and build your own memories without me. I'll miss you, yet I'll never get the chance to tell you, of which I am so sorry." As Anna's mother spoke the final words, she turned towards Anna and smiled. She was no longer absent from the actions of the world and had obtained a semblance of who she was once before. But the moment was quick in passing as her body began to fall as the stool was kicked away, only to be caught with a sickening crack by the rope.

As her mother's body dangled in the air like an ornament upon a tree, Anna looked down at her feet with misty eyes, only to see that the foot that kicked the stool was her own. Slowly, she lifted the stool once again and climbed upon it, coming face to face with another rope that she carefully slipped her head through. A pale hand reached up and grabbed the back of the rope, tightening it to the nape of her neck. She turned to the owner of the hand and was met with the sight of Elsa, standing in front of the crowd in the judge's outfit and speaking to them only to turn back to Anna.

"Let's just forget this ever happened. It was an accident that shouldn't have happened, so it's best not to dwell upon it." She spoke as her leg extended forward, kicking the stool out from beneath Anna. Within an instant, there was a rush of wind as gravity pulled her down and loose strands of rope tickled her chin, urging it to come to them as the dark cord snagged beneath her chin and as her neck snapped…she awoke with a start.