A day without worries…
I really wanted to finish the next chapter of Letters from the past. But when I sat down for it, I couldn't do it. This story is constantly in my head nowadays and maybe I just need to finish it, before starting my other story again. So I took the advice of a really nice woman, who always leaves a review for me. She let me know that, if it helps me to write this, I should definitely do it. Regardless of how it is received. This is my comfort food :) So here is another chapter.
"O, there is Mickey!" Elena yelled excitedly. Damon couldn't help but be amused by her enthusiasm. Here was this 22 year old girl, acting as giddy as a child.
The thing was, this was something she should have done when she was younger. She was making up for old times now. Her inner child was released. Damon smiled as he watched her parade around the main street of Disneyworld.
He had a hard time keeping up with her. She kept on running from one place to the next.
"Come on, Damon!" she laughed.
It was good, seeing her so happy. As if she had almost forgotten what she would have to face eventually. It almost made HIM forget that this beautiful girl..woman.. was withering away.
He swallowed with difficulty at the thought. Was he wrong for doing this? Could he survive taking care of a sick woman again? He had been in this position before. The entire reason why he had wanted to become a doctor.
He wasn't sure if he could do this again. But he also couldn't walk away. From the moment he had spotted her sitting in his hospital, despair on her face, she had reeled him in.
It was very new to him. He had never let a woman come close to him. And he knew it was because of the sickness that had taken away the only woman he had ever loved.
He dated women. He slept with women. And he dumped them as soon as they got too close. It was a perfect solution. His heart would never have to be broken again.
And now here was Elena. And he knew she was going to break his heart.
He was already feeling things for her that was beyond his control. She had crept her way in, where no-one had been able to. And he just met her a few hours ago.
How did that happen?
He watched her with amazement as pure joy was written on her face.
"Aren't you slow today! I said, come one! I want to go on big thunder mountain!" Elena screeched happily. She was practically jumping up and down with the anticipation and excitement.
She grabbed hold of his hand and started pulling him along the street. For her, it probably seemed like the most normal thing in the world. But for him, every time she grabbed his hand, his heart started doing funny things in his chest.
It had started on the airplane, when she had held his hand in fear. She never even noticed the contact. But he had been ready to jump out of his seat. His skin had felt as if it were on fire where she touched. But she never even acknowledged it. She probably didn't feel for him, what he felt for her.
And yet, she still held on to him when she didn't have to. Just like now. They were standing in line, waiting for a roller coaster ride, and she didn't let go. Damon looked down at their hands and felt warmth spreading through his body. Get a grip, Salvatore! For her, it's probably some safety net. Pull yourself together!
But he found himself enjoying the sensation of skin on skin contact. His heart fucking POUNDED at her nearness. He was worried she might hear it, it was thumping so loud.
When they came to the front of the line, she finally let go. They got into the ride and waited for the thing to move…..
"Would you get a load of that picture!" Elena laughed, as they were watching their hilarious photo moment from the big thunder mountain ride. "You look like you are crapping your pants!"
Damon scowled at her. "I was not!"
Elena had tears rolling down her cheeks in laughter. "You SO were! You look scared shitless!"
Damon stared at the photo. She was right. Where she looked beautiful and carefree, he looked like he was about to bolt from the thing.
It was embarrassing.
"Well, since you look perfect. Why don't you keep the picture? You can keep on laughing at my scrunched up face," he mumbled.
Elena shook her head, and handed the thing over to him. "You keep it. I want you to have something to remember me by."
As soon as she had said it, the atmosphere changed from playful to intense. Her smile fell from her face as she stared at him.
Damon swallowed as the thought of losing her slammed into him again.
It was then that he realised an important thing. He didn't need a picture to remember her by. He would ALWAYS remember her. For the rest of his life.
Elena suddenly placed her smile firmly back on her face, as if the moment never happened.
"I want ice cream!" she cried out giddily.
Damon rolled his eyes at her. "Okay then, you big child. Let's get you an ice cream." Elena let out a whoop and trailed behind him.
He ordered chocolate, she ordered vanilla. A perfect juxtaposition for them.
Damon's eyes darkened as he watched her tongue dart out to lick at the cold sustenance. He never knew there was an erotic way to eat ice cream. But she was doing it.
When she let out a small moan as she swallowed it, he had to grip the armrest of the bench they were sitting on. Desire slammed into him full force.
Was she doing this on purpose? She was killing him!
A bit of ice cream drizzled down her chin. She failed to notice it. Should he just mention it? Or should he remove it for her? He decided on the latter and leaned forward.
His finger trailed over the drop on her chin.
Something flashed in Elena's eyes, while he was doing it. But he wasn't sure. She looked at the bit of vanilla ice cream that now coated his finger.
"There was some ice cream on your chin," he explained huskily.
Elena nodded understandingly and watched with hooded eyes as Damon licked the drop off of his finger. Was she feeling it too? This pull between them?
Unfortunately he didn't get the chance to find out. She became playful again, and stole his ice cream from his hands. She jumped up and ran away.
"Hey!"he yelled after her.
"I suddenly felt the need for chocolate!" she yelled back, and ran with her prize. Damon chased her through the park, receiving some strange stares from people around them. O, they could stare all they wanted.
His beautiful Elena was having fun, and he wasn't about to rain on her parade.
"Catch me if you can!" she laughed at him.
After a few moments he saw her stop all of a sudden. He was a few feet away from her and he watched her keel over.
A cold feeling came over him and fear gripped him hard. No! Please god, no! He ran as fast as his legs could carry him, catching up with her while she was gripping the side of a bench hard. She was coughing like crazy.
He immediately held on to her, while she was gasping for breath.
He knew what this meant. He wasn't an idiot. She had told him that her cancer was in an advanced stage. He just never wanted to stop and think about how far advanced it was.
"Raise your arms above your head, Elena. Try to breathe," he told her. She looked at him with fear in her eyes. It almost broke his heart right then and there.
"Listen to me, Elena. This is not happening now. You need to finish your day. You hear me? I can't lose you right now. Not yet," he pleaded. He knew how this would sound to her. He was pouring his guts out.
If she calmed down from this, she would know how he felt. But he didn't care. If this was all the time they had left, he wanted her to know it. He would spend the rest of this day, and whatever time they had left after, loving her.
Elena sat down on the bench and took deep breaths. Eventually she came back down from her wheezing spell. She sagged against him, clutching his shirt in her hands.
They sat that way for a while, holding onto each other.
Damon contemplated everything that just went through his head. The fear of losing her. His feelings evident to him now. It wasn't just an infatuation. It wasn't lust. He was in love with her. After just a few hours spent in her presence, he was head over heels in love with this beautiful creature lying in his arms.
"I'm okay now," Elena whispered against his chest. Damon sighed gratefully, but didn't let go. He kissed the top of her head.
"You can let go now, Damon," she tried again. But Damon shook his head. "Not yet," he whispered.
Elena started playing with the buttons on his shirt. "Damon, we can't do this. You cannot fall in love with me. You know we'll never have the time for a normal relationship. It would be unfair of me to ask this of you. You can't love me," she sighed.
Damon sat up and looked her in the eye. "I don't have a choice in the matter, Elena. You can't just pick who you love. You think I wanted this? You think I woke up this morning and decided that I would walk up to some sick girl in the hospital cafeteria? No. But my heart chose you. I'm not going to be able to turn my back here, Elena."
Elena bit her lip. "I'm not going to let myself fall in love with you, Damon. I can't. It's too hard. I'll never be able to walk away from you if I do."
"So don't walk away from me," Damon said seriously. They stared into each other's eyes for a while.
Finally, Elena sighed and got up from the bench.
"If I want to finish my list today, we better get a move on. There are still so many things to do."
Damon's face fell with disappointment. She was never going to return his feelings. After today, she was going to walk away from him. Because she didn't want to see him end up getting hurt. She didn't want him to mourn her. Well, too late for that.
He stood up from the bench as well.
"Well, let's continue then," he said a bit crankily…
After a couple of hours they realised they needed to leave the park if they ever wanted to finish her last three items.
But Elena wanted to do one last thing. She walked over to a photo booth and beckoned Damon.
He frowned, not really sure what she wanted.
"Regardless of what I said earlier, I do want to remember you. I want to remember the fun we had today. I want to remember the man who helped me achieve my goals. I want to remember this little vacation," she explained.
So she wanted to take pictures with him? She wanted to remember him. Well, at least that made him feel a little better.
They stepped into the booth together, sitting down on the stools inside.
The booth was so small, they had to huddle together. A fact that affected them both. Damon could sense the electricity between them. But they ignored it.
Elena put some coins in the machine and waited for the flashes to come. At first, they made funny faces. They stuck their tongues out at each other. They just goofed around. But it ended with Damon putting his arm around her. They got closer and closer to each other.
Damon glanced sideways at her and caught her looking at him. It was a longing look, similar to his own. Her eyes fell to his lips, licking her own in the process. A move that Damon followed hungrily.
He could hear her breathing becoming heavier. Oh, she wanted him, no matter what she had said earlier!
Damon started stroking her cheek, causing her eyes to flutter. She took a deep breath, obviously still fighting this. Fighting herself. "Damon, stop," she whispered. But it came out really breathy.
He decided to take the risk. He leaned forward and captured her lips in a kiss.
A moan escaped her as soon as her lips came in contact with his.
Her arms locked around his neck on their own accord. She was giving in. But Damon didn't want to push his luck. He took his time, nipping her lips slowly.
And then he cautiously licked the seam of her lips with his tongue. She could still back out of this. He was giving her all the room for it. But instead she opened her mouth and let him in.
His tongue immediately found hers, stroking it hungrily.
Fuck, this felt good!
Elena mewled and practically crawled onto his lap. She clutched his shirt desperately, sucking his tongue into her mouth. Damon grabbed onto her behind, feeling the evidence of his desire for her rising.
When Elena felt it too, she backed away from him. Crawling in the far corner of the booth.
They were both breathing hard.
"That wasn't supposed to happen," Elena whispered.
Damon shrugged. "But it did," was all he said.
Elena ran a hand over her face, looking a bit flushed.
"We are so screwed here!"
Okay, someone asked me why I wanted to let Elena do everything in one day. Well, this all comes from my personal experience.
I learned that my mother had cancer last year November. But we were never really sure it was fatal, until early last June. The doctor told us to hurry if there was still something we wanted to do together. So we dropped everything and went on our last short vacation together. She died four weeks after. So it can all happen really fast. You never know. That's why I am letting everything happen so fast.
And there is the fact that I want to end this story a certain way. So wait and see ;)
Thank you so much for your reviews to this story. It means the world to me.
XOXO
Sandy1983.