AN: Continued because of all of your support! Wow! Thank you! I had never imagined!
Ann T. Sue slumped over the bar at Fangtasia, chugging down her third shot of whiskey. She had excellent alcohol capacity for a 16 year old because she had started drinking when she was 8. She learned to steal from daddy's liquor cabinet, it was the only thing that helped her cope with the abuse.
"Another shot of whiskey," she ordered. The bartender Chow complied immediately because she was a repeat customer. And she tipped well, since she regularly stole from banks. She had made a living out of thievery since she was 11.
Ann drew a hand over her eyes, feeling the horrid purple scar that marred her face. The lightning bolt shaped scar ran from her forehead, through her left eye, and down her cheek. Although Ann was awfully embarrassed by it, it made her look extremely intriguing. She snarled when a handsome vampire offered to buy her a drink.
"Well, wait," she reconsidered. "Get me a shot of whiskey."
The eager vampire got her order while Ann ran a hand through her dirty blond hair. She blinked back tears, not wanting her ample black eyeliner to run. Everyone hated her, (except for Pink, who thought everyone was fuckin' perfect.) Everything Ann did was wrong. She had thought of just drinking herself to death, but that would be a waste. She might as well die by letting some vampires drain her. That way her life wouldn't have been a complete waste.
When her undead suitor offered her the drink, she chugged it expertly. Then she grabbed him by the collar and dragged him out to the parking lot, by the dumpster.
"Do me," she slurred. After 5 shots of whiskey, she now barely had a blood alcohol level of .1. Nonetheless, she was still conscious because alcoholism ran in her family. They all drank, yelled, and hit each other a lot. "Do me now."
The vampire happily complied, ravaging the drunk Ann T. Sue on the filthy, stinking concrete next to the dumpster. She stared at the sky, unfeeling. She never felt anything during sex, physically or emotionally. But she had sex about every night, so she could put some use to her useless body. At least she could make someone happy. The way she could never make her parents happy. Her sister Mary was the perfect one.
As the vampire climaxed and was about to bite into her, a gigantic figure above them roared in anger and pulled the vampire away. The hapless suitor flew through the air and landed in a heap on the other side of the parking lot. Ann's savior gently picked her up and carried her back into Fangtasia.
"I've been watching you," he murmured. "I will take care of you."
Ann finally succumbed to the alcohol and exhaustion, and passed out.
#
When Ann cracked open her eyes, she realized she was naked. This didn't upset her too much, since she often woke up naked, usually with someone else's bodily fluids inside and on her.
What did surprise her was that a handsome, big, blond man was gently washing her in a gigantic bathtub.
"You are the first human I ever brought into my home," he told her. "Only Pam has been here."
"Who's Pam?" Ann asked. She didn't care, she didn't care much about anything, but it seemed to be the polite thing to ask.
"My progeny," the blond replied. "And I had to give you some of my blood, you were so badly battered from the sex and the alcohol. I do not give women my blood. The last woman I gave blood to was Pam." He ran a hand over her old scars. "But these, I could not heal." But he didn't even seem turned off by the cuts, bruises, and marks all over her body. None of them marred her face, of course, except for that intriguing purple scar that she hated but only heightened her appeal somehow.
"Why me?" Again, she didn't care. Mere uncharacteristic politeness.
"I have had many women. There were times when I almost had complete control over women. But. You. Are. Different." The man's blue eyes blazed with passion as he stared down at her. "You are kind. And thoughtful. And sweet. And generous."
Ann couldn't take anymore. She wasn't accustomed to kindness. She covered the man's mouth with her hand. He kissed it.
"There. You're creative too."
"I just met you an hour ago, but it feels like you've known me forever." It was like a dream. She feared she would wake up any time soon. This wasn't her life. She would have been the single mother of 6 if her ovaries had not been permanently damaged one night during an especially bad beating. Her only good fortune was that despite her constant drug abuse, her body showed no signs of yellowing skin, damaged septum, or premature aging. Also, she still had all her teeth somehow. Did she mention that her face wasn't marred at all, except that purple, intriguing, lightning shaped scar, of course?
"You will know me forever, my love," he insisted.
"I don't even know your name."
"Eric. What is yours?"
"Ann."
"Eric." She repeated the name. It felt like honey on her lips that had serviced so many. The author used the term "serviced" to invoke an association with "prostitution" because fellatio is always degrading unless it is performed by a shy virgin heroine on a much more experienced male who is pleasantly surprised by said shy virgin's expert administrations and is completely infatuated by said shy virgin, who is, by the way, actually not a virgin anymore, because only recently former virgins may perform fellatio on their enamored partners without being unacceptably promiscuous. "You are so different from all the other men I've encountered."
"And you are so different from all the women I've encountered. Never have I met a character so tragic and deserving of sympathy. You are the complete opposite of Mary…"
Ann's eyes widened. "How do you know her?" she demanded. "You speak of my sister?" The perfect little virgin in her virginal little sundresses.
"Do not worry Ann. I will leave her for you. She is so perfect she can't be true. But you— you are so tragic that I can't help but want to coddle you. I would be an ass for not wanting to protect you. Unlike your sister Mary Sue, you are so real. You are the inspiration for Shakespeare."
Ann felt a twinge of love in her cold, shattered heart. "You will never leave me?"
"Never."
As they made love, neither they nor the author realized the ridiculous irony of the sex as a symbol of Ann's redemption. Eric's 1000 years of misogyny built up by fucking only gold digging whores melted away as he fucked a whore with a golden heart, because that was almost as therapeutic and magical as fucking a soon to be whore who until very recently had an iron hymen.
Despite Ann's long history of men, she had never found one that could maintain an 8 hour erection without passing out from cardiac arrest. But Eric was different, of course, and she found that continuous 8 hour intercourse with a demanding vampire with a giant penis did not become painful or uncomfortable at all because she conveniently did not have a cervix and her posterior vaginal wall did not rest against her bladder.
As a matter of fact, she never wanted it to stop. Nor did Eric, for that matter, for he had never met a woman who wanted him just for himself, and not just for his money. Because all attractive women, with the exception of Sookie Stackhouse, Mary Sue, and Ann T. Sue, are gold digging whores who are only after money, and that is so much more morally outrageous than a man who is only after sex. Never had it occurred to Eric that he could find more wholesome women if he ever ventured outside of his vampire bar where people specifically came to gawk at vampires and have sex with vampires because a little bit of curiosity and experimentation is perfectly natural and healthy (but only if you're a virginal heroine.) For everyone else it's just skanky and makes you a fangbanger.
Little did Eric and Ann know that they would soon be torn apart by a purple haired, purple eyed, leather clad vampire slayer named Meyriadnra Suecretizia.
AN
Thank you for all of your support. It was the only thing that gave me the inspiration to continue this. Remember, this is just in fun. There are lots of incredible OC stories out there, many of them better than the junk that TB and SVM have become.
I hope you will check out and enjoy Blah Blah Vampire Emergency Blah, which features a character who is not a virgin and is not a telepathic cousin of Sookie who happens to move back to Bon Temps.