*EDIT - Sorry the chapter corrupted so I had to repost it*

Librarycat9 has been throwing this idea at me for a while now and I only just realised the potential it has! So thankyou Librarycat9 for your contribution =)

As for tafe, it hasn't fully kicked into the swing of things just yet so things are safe for the moment... as such; I present a chapter as a peace offering.

Chapter 9

The three ladies sat in silence as the credits rolled through. The movie had run for a full hour and atleast two of the members present had seen things they had never even thought possible. Actually, just one of those two never thought it possible. The other one just never thought. Taking another swig from the nearly empty bottle, Tsunade glanced down the neck to see what was left. Turning her gaze to the company, she smirked. That had to have worked or else nothing would, short of actually making the boy... girl do the deed. Leaning forward, she suppressed a chuckle at their faces. Naruto was sitting straight, eyes impossibly wide and her mouth a touch open. It was actually rather cute Tsunade mused, but that was for another time. It was also the longest period she had ever heard the boisterous blond stay quiet for.

'Gotta enjoy the little things', she supposed.

Tenten however was hilarious. The girl was painfully red faced and pressed back into the chair like she was trying to escape some form of attacker. Her body was turned away from the TV like she wanted to hide but her eyes had seemingly remained glued to the screen. Her mouth was also wide open in terror and was squeaking softly to herself in what sounded like a comfort noise. Seeing the taller blond move in the corner of her eye, the traumatised girl dragged her violated view from the TV to her. Her eyes began filling with tears and she let out a sob.

"H-how could you do that to me Tsunade-sama? I'm only Fourteen years old! I haven't even had a real boyfriend yet!"

The accused woman just shrugged. "You should know full well what you got yourself into when you were promoted to Genin. The second you got that headband, you instantly told the world, 'Hey, I'm now an adult and able to do all sorts of adult things!' Watching porn for educational purposes are well included within that."

Tenten flapped an angry arm at the TV. "Educational maybe, but I didn't need to see how two people can get it done on a ceiling!"

Tsunade just huffed and rubbed her nose. "Don't give me that. There was a valuable lesson on stamina and chakra control there."

Tenten's mouth dropped open in disgust but couldn't fault the woman's words. 'I suppose it would be hard doing that on a ceiling. Especially being distracted so much by – '

Her face instantly turned red and she slapped the dirty thoughts away. Tsunade chuckled and downed the last of her drink with a satisfied smack of her lips. Turning to look at Naruto, she saw the girl sitting there quietly, watching her friends talk. The lack of reaction on her face though made Tsunade worry. Either that little session broke her already fragile brain or it didn't go as desired. Spinning her chair around backwards, she plonked herself down in front of the girl.

"So Naruto, any questions?"

Naruto shook her head. "Nope. I more or less worked everything out from that show. A few things did surprise me though."

Tsunade nodded. "Alright. Re-cap for me."

Naruto nodded with a grin. "Right! The man's..."

She held up a finger.

"Goes in a girls..."

She pointed down at herself this time to Tenten's enormous relief.

"And it then goes in and out, but that's when I started getting confused."

Tsunade raised an eyebrow. "How so?"

Naruto laughed. "Well, I was always thought the throwing up was done down there! Hahaha, who would have guessed that the womb was down a girls throat?"

Tenten snorted violently and turned a sickly green while Tsunade felt like writing off the fellow blond as a lost cause. "No Naruto, that's not right."

Naruto's eyebrows then shot up into her hairline. "But that's where all of it went!"

Tsunade sighed. "Maybe in what you saw just then it did but no, that's not right."

Naruto huffed in frustration and crossed her arms in thought. " Well why the hell did they do that then? And how was I meant to know? I mean that's where all the – "

"DON'T SAY IT!"

Cleaning an ear after Tenten's mighty roar, Naruto continued. "But yeah, like, it went there but then I still had a guess of two other places! Seriously, girls are a maze! Pick the wrong entrance and you hit a dead end."

Tenten held her head in pure embarrassment for the young girl, also feeling a might headache coming on. She really wished that the shock of seeing what she saw chased away the hangover as well as the buzz.

She unfortunately tuned back into the conversation at the wrong time. "So babies do actually grow in the tummy? I thought so... but how else would the man's ball snot get there if not though the mouth?"

Tenten thought now was a very good time to just lie down and sleep off the headache. The thump of body hitting floor didn't even register to the conversing blonds.

Tsunade meanwhile had convinced Naruto on her error. "So you're telling me that the front bum is the baby cave?"

Tsunade sighed. It seemed that that was as close to the real thing she was gona get her. "Yes Naruto, that's right. Then it's a 9 month wait and then the baby comes back out the same way the man went in."

Naruto's eyes scrunched in thought. "But, aren't babies like, way massive to fit out that?"

Tsunade nodded. "Yeah, but woman stretch. Usually the baby comes out just fine."

The sparkling in Naruto's eyes made the woman facepalm furiously. "That is AMAZING! So girls have like super powers or something I've never been told about? Man I wish I was a girl!"

Tsunade sighed in frustration. "Believe me when I say you really don't want that Naruto."

A little tick went off above Naruto's head as she realised something. "Wait, I AM a girl! I have super powers!"

She instantly started running around the room making zooming noises and laughing all the while. Tsunade growled and grabbed Naruto as she ran past and lifted her off the ground. The excited blond giggled furiously and blew a raspberry as she defied gravity.

"NARUTO!"

One big shake had the girl quiet and holding her head as the room spun. Tsunade then pointed to the charts behind her.

"Look, Naruto, just because you have a faulty henge on does not mean you are a girl! There are so many differences between guys and girls that it would take me a full week to explain it! To you, probably triple that length though."

Naruto tenderly shook her head and looked up at her captor. "Na-ah! I did a really good job of creating this jutsu. I AM a girl. See?"

Naruto then grabbed a handful of her chest in proof. Tsunade raised an eyebrow in surprise.

"That's quite the creation then Naruto. Not many people can make solid transformations, but I suppose with your unique ability with the Kage Bunshin's it's to be expected. But never the less, on the inside you are still a boy. Not a girl, no superpowers, nothing. Ok?"

Naruto crossed her arms and pouted. "But it feels so real! I thought I'd gotten everything right too..."

Tsunade sighed and dropped the girl. "Ok Naruto, I'll show you the difference. I'll scan you to show you what your insides look like then scan..."

She saw Tenten volunteer. Atleast that's what she'd tell the girl later.

"Tenten to show you the difference."

Naruto whooped in glee, previous foul forgotten. "Woo! I get to see my guts!"

She motioned for Naruto to sit on the desk and then whipped out an ultrasound. "Ok, lift your shirt. This will be cold alright?"

The blond tensed and them gasped as the cold goo hit her tummy. Looking up at the screen, Naruto scrunched up her face as she tried make head and tails of the screen. Tsunade pointed to the diagram to her left.

"Ok Naruto this is a boy and a girl right?"

Naruto nodded her understanding. Not a reliable source.

"Right, so right now you can see your lungs here and here."

Moving the scanner up to Naruto's ribs, she pointed out the dark makings on the screen and then pointed them out on the charts. Pushing up, she moved the scanner higher up Naruto's chest. That was when the woman gasped in surprise. Naruto looked up at the screen wondering what happened.

"Baachan...?"

"Oh, it's nothing Naruto, just thought I saw something. Never mind though it's gone now."

Actually, Tsunade HAD seen something and it was a very important something indeed.

'Breast tissue! He actually has breast tissue! That's impossible but! This is meant to be an external change! So what is going on?'

Frowning, Tsunade moved the scanner down lower across Naruto's stomach. Thankfully there was nothing different there but what she saw back up on Naruto's chest concerned her. Returning to the girls chest, she checked Naruto's boobs again. And again, the same tissue that should not be present was quiet clearly, present.

"You having fun there Tsunade-sama?"

The blond duo looked over to see Tenten looking up from her spot on the floor. Tsunade looked down at her hand to see the scanner had pushed a good distance up onto Naruto's chest and was revealing quite a significant amount of under-boob. Tsunade straightened up as Naruto pulled her shirt down.

"Not as much fun as you watching I'd guess."

Tenten sent the older lady a look and pushed herself to her feet. She groaned and held her head as the headache returned. Tsunade just laughed.

"You're a bit of a light weight there Tenten-chan." She tossed the girl a packet. "Take one of these then go have another nap. You'll feel right as rain after."

Tenten nodded and swallowed one of the pills inside. Sighing, she bowed. "If that's the case Tsunade-sama, unless you have more porn to scar me with, I'll be off home."

The Hokage just waved a hand in her direction. "Yeah, yeah, that's fine. Just take Naruto with you. It's a fast acting sedative so have her there to catch you just in case you drop off."

Naruto nodded and smiled. "Right! You can count on me!"

Tsunade sighed and then shooed them out. Calling out to them, she made one final request. "Oh, and Naruto, when you change back to a boy, come see me would you? I need to run another scan over you."

Remembering his forgotten lesson, he nodded. "Sure thing Baachan! See you later then."

Closing the door on the two teens, Tsunade felt like slumping to the floor. Yet another mystery surrounding Naruto had appeared and it definitely had to rank up in the top five weirdest of all time. Walking over to her ultrasound, she glared at the screen.

"Naruto, how the hell did you manage to actually add that kind of tissue when you don't even know where the spine attaches to?"

This definitely called for more sake and thought.

XxXxXxX

A dusty Tenten was now slung over Naruto's shoulder snoring blissfully. The girl had managed to make it out of the Hokage's tower before slumping onto Naruto's side and dropping off before she could say 'catch me'. The result now drew strange looks from the crowds as the bouncy blond skipped along happily. She was so very happy that she was able to help Tenten out for carrying her home! Naruto had managed to get Tenten to explain how they got home the previous night and as such was incredibly grateful to the girl. A strange cat call made the girl look over and she saw Anko throwing her thumbs up.

"That's how we used to do it! None of this romance and stuff! Just in and out. Keep it real girl!"

Having absolutely no inkling to what the crazy snake lady meant, Naruto just smiled and waved. "I plan to! A Hokage's gotta keep it simple to run a village after all."

Anko whooped in joy and pointed a finger at the disappearing pair. "THAT'S MY GIRL! Cannot wait to see you making the decisions!"

Grinning broadly, Naruto shouted a thankyou over her shoulder to her newest favourite adult. 'What a nice lady! I was all wrong about her! I'll have to remember that.'

Finally reaching Tenten's house, she kicked open the door and found Tenten's bed. Dropping the girl into it, Naruto kind of tucked her in as best she could before leaving. Closing the door behind her, she smiled happily at the completed mission and jumped off the balcony. On the way down her tummy growled and reminded her of her rather limited breakfast. Landing lightly, Naruto then made to head off to her most favourite-est restaurant in the whole wide world when a voice sent a shiver down her spine.

"Guy-sensei! There she is! That wonderful spring lotus that bloomed with only the finest of flowers and fragrances!"

Turning stiffly, Naruto saw Konoha's green beast and his apprentice running towards her.

"What a fine young lady you have found Lee-kun! We must show her the strength of your own youthful blossom!"

"HAI, GAI-SENSEI!"

"LEE!"

"GUY-SENSEI!"

"LEE!"

Knowing it was a futile attempt to run, Naruto still turned and ran, if only to prolong the inevitable for a few more moments.

XxXxXxX

A/N – well that was fun to write! I actually managed to pump this out in a few hours too =) I got a bit stuck about halfway through the chappy but librarycat9's idea came to my rescue. Anyway, hope you all found it as unexpected as possible! I even had a laugh at my own idea. Is that weird? Probably, but damn does it help my writing XD

Lanky Nathan