TWILIGHT RANDOMNESSSSSSSSSSSS!
Carlise:I don't understand, your mother and I went on a small get-away for just two weeks and you managed to get two rock bands and an unsupervised teenager staying at our house!
Edward: (head on table...still) I don't want to talk about it right now...
Me: Hey Eddy, Nessie wants to know if we can go out with the sour guys tonight. They're going indoor skydiving with some other famous people and said a few invitations were open...
Esme:'The sour guys?' Who exactly are the sour guys? And who are you?
Me: Excuse me miss lady person but I am Livi Webb and I am the friend of Jake's aunt's niece.
Carlise and Esme:JACOB!
(Jacob enters slowly from fear of thrown knives, glass objects, soft toys etc..)
Jacob:Thank god you pulled my out of that mess, those Germans are at war with your boys and it's getting really ugly.
Me: I guess it didn't help that I stole Bill's hair product and said it was Emmett. Oh and I guess it also doesn't help that I wrote Cullen's Suck, Kaulitz's Rule in window paint in Edwards room...
(Silence...)
Jacob: You didn't...
Edward: She's not lying...
(series of large crashes from other room)
Esme: What in the name of crow was that?
Carlise: Let's hope it wasn't that dining room table from France again...
Person: YOU STOLE MR. SQUGGLE!
Other Person: BECAUSE YOU STOLE MY RAINBOW UNICORN!
Me: I think I should-
Edward: Oh no, you and Nessie aren't going sky-diving indoors or out until you get this situation straight. Unless of course, you want to the Voltouri to-
Me: NO! Alright, I'll see what I can do...
(Moments later...)
Corey: Why are we wearing camo again?
Me: Because it makes for a better operation!
Bella: Thank god Alice made them those outfits!
Me: Yeah! If you squint and look to the side you guys kinda look-
Edward: Alright can we get a move on please? We have six, maybe seven crazy people running rampant in a VERY expensive house. We have to fix them or get them out, fast!
Me: Alright, here's the plan. Team A will take German detail and Team B will take Vamp detail. All of you are armed with weapons that will entice and capture even the stupidest vampire or band member.
Corey, Jim and Roy: HEY!
Me: Sorry guys, anyway, any questions?
Corey: The comment wasn't necessary...
Me: Well you know what, how about I let my rainbow unicorn Bob do the presentation and tell you guys how this is going to go down? The presentation was pre-made online! Anyway, lets move!
(Teams split and head into the dark, foggy, aby-, wait what am I talking about? The teams split and head into THE CULLEN HOUSEHOLD full of RARE and OLD relics)
Bella: I can hear Jasper and Emmet laughing themselves upstairs, why don't we start there?
Me: nod But we must do this with stealth and precision!
(Seconds later...)
Bella: AHHHHHHHHH!
(Door crashes open)
Me: Put the German hottie down. There will be a Peace Treaty meeting in the living room in a few minutes, both of you go, now!
Jasper: Nah.
Me: (aiming flame-thrower) This thing is loaded you know...
Bella: Jazzy, move along. NOW!
Jasper: mumbling Stupid sister, thinks she's the stuff. I'll show her one day, I'll show them all one day!
Me: I wonder how the guys are doing...
Bella: Who knows?
TO BE CONTINUED...