Author's Note: Thanks to everyone who reviewed and favorite this story, and many thanks for all of the story alerts. Enjoy this chapter! Please remember, I own none of these characters!
Chapter 9
The morning after Will showed Tessa how to pleasure Jem, he woke up to Jem twirling his fingers in the downy soft bit of hair on his lower stomach. It was arousing, and even more so to have Jem all to himself (they had always enjoyed the occasional good morning fuck) but it was different now, because now Jem was engaged to Tessa, a girl Will once loved… no, still loved.
After that realization, Will had jumped out of bed, shaking his head, silently telling Jem they were passed all that. What happened between Will, Jem, and Tessa could never be repeated, but Will was hard pressed to find a moment where his mind didn't wander to that middle of the night encounter. It was there, always, the memory of the two people he loved pleasuring one another while he had participated.
Now it was two days after that night. Will was back to spending the night with Jem, because Jem didn't want to be alone, and he didn't want to risk Tessa getting caught in his bedroom by either Sophie or Charlotte. The three of them spent meals together, but Will could barely look Tessa in the eye. It wasn't that he saw her almost naked and wanted to forget (he wanted to do anything but forget). It was just that he couldn't bear the thought of Jem and Tessa carrying on like that without him, and so they pretended together. Will pretended that Jem wasn't really marrying Tessa, Jem pretended that he really wasn't dying, and they all pretended that that one night hadn't really happened. Still, Will saw the truth in the way Jem looked at he and Tessa both: like they were the only thing that kept him going; the craving that could be satisfied whenever he wanted it to be.
"So we were thinking two weeks from now. July the third," Jem said. He was leaning heavily on his cane, his right arm laced with Will's left, their fingers entwined together, palm to palm. After lunch Jem had asked Will to take a walk with him, and Will obliged, since Jem said he had something he wanted to discuss. This was apparently it. "Tessa wanted some time to find a dress. Charlotte is going to help us put together a little something for the wedding. We are probably just going to have tea sandwiches and cookies after the ceremony. I doubt it will be any more than just Tessa and I, you, Sophie, and Gideon, and Charlotte and Henry."
"You mean, you are going to have the wedding two weeks from now?" Will asked. "Has the Clave given their approval?" Jem grimaced and held Will's hand tighter. "Are you in pain?"
"Yes, Will, there is a deep aching pain in my backside and it's name is not Will Herondale. This pain goes by the name "The Clave," Jem said. "No, they have not given their approval, but that doesn't matter. The last thing I am going to do is let the Clave stand in the way of my happiness." They reached the Library door. Will pulled it open and followed Jem across the room. Sometimes they came here to study, other times, just to be alone together.
"I thought you were happy," Will said. Jem turned to him, brushing some hair off his forehead, peering into Will's eyes.
"So did I," Jem said. "But now… I can have so much more, and so can you. You must promise me, Will, that you marry the first girl you fall in love with." Will tasted acid at the back of his throat. He was unsure if Jem expected a promise, which Will was unsure of his ability to give. "And if it is a man you fall in love with, please know, you have my blessing as well. I only want you to be happy and in love." Will nodded quickly.
"Why are you saying these things?" Will asked. Jem sighed and gripped Will's hand tighter.
"It was always like this, wasn't it?" Jem asked, a little breathlessly. "You've always held my hand and supported me when I needed it, and I've done the same for you. Always."
"I'm your parabatai," Will said, "how could I not?" Jem smiled and shrugged.
"I'm getting old, and so are you," Jem said. "I love you and I just want you taken care of. Think about the future, William. Think of the family you could have. Think of…" The Library door creaked open and Tessa walked in, sneaking glances behind her as the door closed. She turned to see Jem and Will standing there and emitted a tiny gasp, her eyes finding first Will, then Jem. "Tessa." Jem held out his hand.
"Has he agreed?" Tessa asked, coming closer. Jem took her hand and held it and Will's as well, so they were all connected in one way or another.
"I haven't asked him yet," Jem said, giving Tessa the smile he reserved only for her. "Will… since it seems only fitting… will you please be my best man? It would mean so much to Tessa and I." Will forced himself to look Tessa in the eyes, if only to beg her, silently, "never tell him about you and I, about how I feel for you, because it will ruin everything." Will imagined he, Jem, and Tessa were a house composed solely of cards, one stacked on top of another, and if one card gave way, one piece was moved in the slightest, they would all topple down and never be right again.
"I would be honored," Will said. Jem smiled and hugged Will around the neck, kissing his cheek.
"You have no idea how much that means to Tessa and I," Jem said, releasing Will. "Sophie is going to serve as Tessa's maid of honor. She's already agreed to it." As if Sophie would have had much choice in the matter. Will hated himself for feeling the slightest bit relieved that he wouldn't be the only person faking happiness at Jem and Tessa's wedding.
"So two weeks from now. That is going to be perfect," Will said, shocked at the bravado in his voice. Then again, he felt as though he had spent the last third of his life acting. He could keep up the charade for another two weeks, and then… he doubted he would be the first Shadowhunter to walk away from their parabatai. It would be for the best if he did that. He wouldn't have to see the last sad chapter of Jem's life, or the fleeting happiness he had with Tessa, or…
"The sooner the better, my beautiful bride," Jem whispered, kissing Tessa on the cheek. Will felt a knife twist in his chest as Tessa's eyes met his. "Come then, Tess. Will and I want to show you something."
Jem pulled them across the library to a spiral staircase. They walked up it single file, Tessa leading with Jem in the middle. Will knew where they were going, it was where they always went, only, they hadn't gone there since Tessa's arrival at the Institute.
"Jem, I…" Will said, watching as Jem hurried Tessa along the upper level of the Library, between bookshelves and a railing. Will was transported to a memory of he and Jem playing hide and seek, darting between bookshelves, misbehaving, being boys. They were all of thirteen the first time they stumbled, out of breath, into the alcove, which was where Jem pulled Tessa now. Will followed, shaking his head.
The alcove was a room which had been meant to be one of several; only, when the Institute was built, the builder made one study room, and then used the space meant for more alcoves instead for more bookshelves. The room was composed of three walls, two of which were covered with bookshelves, and a third, made of a floor to ceiling stained glass window of the Angel rising up from the Lake, the Mortal Instruments in his hands. Some days, the sunlight would stream into the windows and color the walls in a multitude of shades. Other days, the sun didn't shine on this side of the Institute, and yet the window still glowed.
"Will," Jem gasped. He released Tessa's hand and went over to Will, pulling him close, kissing him passionately. His tongue moved against Will's mouth and Will squeezed his eyes shut, trying to keep the tears at bay, his hands resting on Jem's jaw, kissing back, giving him everything. In another world, this would be the place that Jem, healthy, alive, and cured of his affliction said his goodbyes to Will, and while this wasn't that world and Jem was saying anything but that, this still felt a lot like goodbye.
Jem broke the kiss and pulled Will across the room to where Tessa stood beside a table, the site of so many romantic trysts between Will and Jem. Jem removed his coat and tossed it down, then pushed his shirt sleeves up. He lifted Tessa onto the table and spread her knees so that he was able to stand between them. He kissed Tessa first on the lips, then on the neck, and then Tessa was lifting her hand, beckoning to Will, come closer.
Will dropped his coat onto the floor and kicked his shoes off. He climbed on top of the table and knelt behind Tessa as Jem lifted Tessa's right leg up. He unbuckled her shoe and pulled it off, then pulled her stocking down and off, slowly, tantalizingly slow, following it's decent with his lips gently kissing her skin. Tessa moaned and leaned back against Will, who was getting hard just watching Jem pleasure Tessa. Will kissed Tessa's neck, his fingers moving carefully against her shoulders, slipping under the straps of her dress, never dipping beneath her collar bones… not yet, anyway. Jem removed her other shoe and stocking, then straightened and kissed her lips, before kissing Will's as well.
"It could be this way." The thought invaded Will's mind without any warning, pulling him away, momentarily, from the matter at hand. It could never be this way. Soon enough, Jem and Tessa would marry, and there would be a wedding night Will would not be invited to. It could never be this way. But it could. If Will didn't step aside and neither did Jem or Tessa, it could be this way.
"May I touch you?" Jem whispered. Tessa was leaning against Will, her breasts heaving, her breath coming in gasps. She nodded and ran her hand over the front of Jem's trousers, causing him to groan. "And may I do more than just touch you?"
"Yes, you may," Tessa said. Jem's hands disappeared beneath Tessa's skirts. Tessa gasped, her eyes wide, as Jem pulled her panties down and tossed them onto the floor. He sat down on the bench beside the table, hooked Tessa's knees over his shoulders, and pushed her skirts up around her waist. Will licked his lips, watching as Jem bent his head down between Tessa's thighs. Tessa might have fallen backwards as she shivered, had Will not been behind her. He took her in his arms as she crushed her lips to his, moaning, warm air hitting his mouth.
Will's hand found the buttons at the back of Tessa's dress. He released them, one by one, until her dress loosened. She wore no corset, but rather a simple chemise that Will pushed down, fully revealing her bosom. Tessa took Will's hand and pressed it to her breasts, and Will, unable to say no, touched her there as they continued to kiss.
Somewhere beneath Tessa's skirts, Jem was moaning the way he used to whenever it was he on his knees for Will. Will unloosened his trousers and slipped a hand inside, only Tessa shook her head and pushed her own hand into Will's trousers, gripping him tightly, showing him that she had learned something from their last encounter.
It could be this way. So what if Jem and Tessa were married. Tessa understood that Will and Jem were married too, if only in a different way. After all, Jem and Will had already had their wedding night, where they made love after swearing their parabatai vow. Jem and Tessa's wedding night was a formality; afterwards, it could be this way. It could work, if they wanted it to.
Jem was sounding breathless beneath Tessa's skirts. She was moaning and squeezing Will's cock in such a proficient manner, bringing him close, forcing him to sweat and pant against her neck and lips. They were making plenty of noise, Will knew it, but above it all, he heard the creak of a floorboard in the same instant Jem leapt to his feet and jerked Tessa's skirts down. Tessa pulled her hand out of Will's pants and pulled her dress up to cover her breasts as a shadow sipped between the bookshelves.
"Will?" Cecily asked. "Will, are you…" Cecily stepped into the alcove and brought her hand to her mouth to stifle a scream. It didn't help. "William Edmund Herondale Jr., what are you doing?"
Author's Note: Thanks for reading! Please review? Please? Reviews provoke me to update faster!
"I was under the assumption that our business was done," Will said.