I AM SO SORRY! I know it's been forever since my last update but I have plenty of good reasons why. First, I had finals. Second, I lost the power cord for my computer. It's a very old computer so it won't work without the power cord. Thirdly, I got a job out of town so I'm not home most of the time. And then, when I am home, I'm either too tired or I have more pressing matters that acquire my attention. Or both. And lastly, I had a damn writer's block! I know that these are just excuses but I am SO sorry.

She is. She was so busy working that she managed to ignore me most of the time.

It sure ain't easy. And it didn't stop you from nagging me.

Of course it didn't sway me from reminding you to update. Get on with the story so you don't make your readers wait even longer.

Alright! I don't own a damn thing!

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'God damn it!" I growled in frustration. I am currently trying to find something to hide the love-bite that was so lovingly bestowed upon me.

Yeah, fucking right.

"O'Connell?" Evie's soft voice made me jump. How long has she been there?

"Hold on!" I scramble around the bathroom, looking for something to cover my neck. But, what, is the question.

The door opens and for a second, I'm glad that I closed the door to the adjoining bathroom door.

"Rick? Are you in the loo?"

Aha! Found something! "Yeas, Evie, I am." Just give me a few seconds before you open this door too. I hurriedly prepare the shaving cream that I found in a drawer. I had just put on some of the shaving cream when Evie opened the bathroom door. I mentally signed.

"O'Connell, are you alright? You sounded a bit odd when I heard you curse."

Crap, she heard me? When? I could feel a droplet of sweat make its merry way down my spine. "No, no, I'm fine. Something wrong?"

Evie looks at me suspiciously before dropping the subject. "Nothing really, it's just that you need a jacket today. Do you have a high-collared one?"

I mentally cheered in my head. "I don't, but do you have one that I can borrow? I would greatly appreciate it." I added a smile to the end of it to get her to cave.

She looks at me like a parent would when scolding their children for forgetting their mittens. She closed her eyes and sighed dramatically. I could feel my smile widen. "I guess you can. Don't damage it though, alright?"

I lean towards her and pecked her on the cheek. "Thanks Evie. I really appreciate it."

"You better. You owe me after all this ends. You can treat me to something of my pick, okay?"

"It depends on what you pick, but I agree to your terms."

"What do we agree on?" Evie and I jump at Jonathon's sudden appearance in my bathroom. We looked at him and he had one eyebrow raised and his arms crossed. Almost like a mother would when she has caught her children raiding the cookie jar and they swear that they didn't eat any. While there is crumbs on their faces and clothes and their hands are literally in the half empty cookie jar.

"We are agreeing on what I have to treat Evie to after all of this is over. For all her trouble, of course."

"You have to treat me too!"

"Eh? Why do I have to do that?"

"Because I am going though trouble too!" I glanced down at Evie and was sorry that I did. She was looking at me with this expectant look on her face. I sighed and rolled my eyes.

"Fine, Jonathon, I'll do something for you too."

"That's good to know. So, what are we going to do today?"

Evie was about to answer him when I decided to change the scenery. "Um, guys?" The siblings' heads turn towards me. Evie frowned. "Can we exit my bathroom then discuss what is going to happen?"

Evie blushed and Jonathon grins. "Alright, we'll leave. But can this meeting take place in the library? I still have to get ready and eat something."

Evie looks at her brother and smiles. "Sure Jonathon, but make something for everyone. We need to eat too."

"I guess so. What do you want?"

I was about to answer when Jonathon leaned towards me and got really close to my neck. And I mean REALLY CLOSE. Afraid that he would see the mark, I jerked away and hit the back of my head hard against the mirror hanging on the wall above the sink. I was faintly aware of glass shattering as I crumple to the ground. My vision begun to darken as I watch Evie and Jonathon lunge towards me and I wonder what that warm liquid running down my neck is.

\/\/

"Wake up." A raspy voice commanded. Well, not quite raspy, more like the person's voice was made out of a thousand people's moans of pain. I scrunched up my eyebrows, not yet believing what I was hearing was real. I already had a dream about Imhotep, why not something different?

All of a sudden, I was brought out of my thoughts with a swift kick to my ribs and an unearthly shriek. "GET UP!" I snapped my eyes open and curled to protect my now aching ribs.

I looked up to see a lady in dark blue robes that showed her chest but not her breasts and that it hid her feet. It also looked like she was floating above the stone floor that I was laying upon. The look of total disgust was clearly showing on her face.

"So, you're him, hm? How pathetic. A man in love with a corpse." Her voice made me want to bash me head in.

"Who the Hell are you?"

Her face split into a maniacal grin that almost made me want to start weeping. Almost. "And you're a spitfire. He has chosen well." Her smile disappeared and was replaced with a sneer. She turned, for lack of a better word, floated up to her throne. It was tall and wide but it suited her.

I pushed myself up and was sitting on my hip with my hands braced on the floor. I didn't move anymore because my ribs were protesting quite loudly against me moving. When I looked up at the women, I noticed that she had sat down and was now watching me with her back ramrod straight and her hands on the skulls that were fastened to the end of the armrests. I then knew who she was.

I finished settling myself by sitting cross-legged but my right hand against my sore ribs. I didn't think it was broken but it hurt like a bitch. I looked up at her again and noticed that she was watching me with amusement. I figured that she wasn't going to say anything, so I did.

"You're the goddess, Astarte, aren't you?"

She smiled that maniacal grin again and raised an eyebrow. "Ooh, and you're smart as well. I wonder at the other skills that you have."

By now I was getting annoyed. "What are you talking about?" I tried not to be snappy but I couldn't help it. I mean, what do you expect? I wake up in some strange land, for the second time I might add, where I happen to meet Astarte, goddess of the Underworld. And I shouldn't ask questions or get annoyed? Yea, fucking right.

….Wait…..Underworld?

"Oh no." Her smile widens.

"Yes, Rick O'Connell, you are in the Underworld."

As my worst fears have been confirmed, I try not to go ballistic. It wouldn't do any good to piss off the queen of the Underworld, now would it?

"I have a proposition for you."

I looked up at Astarte and was scared. Really, who wouldn't? There is a goddess who wants you to do something for her and it's-

"Stop thinking. Listen closely. I want you to make Imhotep fall in love with you." I could feel my eyes widen. Make Imhotep fall in love with me? Confessing would have been hard, but shit, getting him to love me back? Talk about the impossible.

"I-"

"No arguments. I will give you a choice though."

"Yeah? What are they?"

"Take my challenge and live happily or reject it and be damned forever."

"What? I don't understand."

"Your physical essence is in what you would call a coma. And you probably won't come out of it without some help."

"Meaning you help, right?"

"You are incredibly smart! That's exactly what I mean."

"So…. Basically I make Imhotep fall in love with me, I go back to England. But if I fail, I don't go back and I'm damned forever. That is, if I do it. And if I don't, well, I die. I don't win, do I?"

Astarte looked slightly impressed. "If that is how you wish it. But I don't quite understand what you mean; explain."

"I mean, I love Imhotep. I can't make him fall in love with me and then leave him. There's no point." I waited for her response. She looked annoyed yet slightly amused.

"Isidoros*, when did I ever say that you'll leave him? It would be cruel to tease him like that. No, I want you to make him admit that love conquers all. He doesn't believe that he can rule the world with someone to worship by his side. So, we made a bet. If he proves me wrong, he gets the world and the Underworld. If I prove him wrong, he gets the world."

"So…I wouldn't actually leave him?"

"If he chooses you, you wouldn't leave him. If he doesn't want you, you come back to me and I get to decide what to do with you."

"What does that mean?"

"It means what it means."

"That doesn't make sense!"

"You'll understand later."

I was about to retaliate when a hunched over person draped in robes that prevented me from seeing their face, came out of the shadows behind Astarte's throne and begun to whisper furiously into her ear. She nodded her head and waved one of her hands and the figure turned and disappeared back into the shadows. Astarte turned her gaze back to me and smirked. "I advise that you prepare yourself to reacquaint yourself with the object of your affections."

"ASTARTE!"

The huge doors behind me boomed open and in came Imhotep. My heart nearly beat out of my chest. He still hadn't grown any hair, which was a shame, but it didn't take away from his handsomeness. He was dressed in robes that a ruler would wear. And he walked right past me.

"I hear that you have brought a man, who was the one who sent me back, here."

"He is right behind you. And be respectful."

Imhotep slowly turns and looks straight at me. All I could do is gaze back at him, holding my breath. His black-rimmed eyes widen before narrowing and he spun back to face Astarte.

"HIM!" He bellowed. "You chose him out of the three people who sent me back? Why not the woman or the weaker male?"

"I have my reasons. And it would have been too easy for you. Darjaya* would be a challenge."

"Darjaya*? What else have you called him?"

"I will call him by what I want to call him by. It is none of your concern. You have to abide by the rules. You told me to choose, so I choose. Deal with it."

"I will not-"

"Imhotep, you will obey me! I am your queen and you will abide by the rules that you accepted! Whether you like them or not!"

In her anger, she had stood up and you could feel her anger. Imhotep actually flinched.

"Fine, I'll take him." Imhotep turned on his heel and stomped his way towards me. He snatched my upper arm and would have dragged me if I had not stumbled to my feet.

"Remember Imhotep, every waking hour! And see that you bring Onesiphoros* to me every once in a while to visit."

Still gripping me by my upper arm, Imhotep and I exit out of the huge doors –which began to close behind us- and down a dark and sweltering hallway. All of a sudden, I feel myself being pushed against the wall and my heart begun to beat erratically again. The memories of my wet dream begun to flood back and I tried to wriggle out from under Imhotep but he just pressed his body hard against mine. I stilled and relaxed, hopping that he wouldn't feel my erection.

"Listen, you-"

"My name is Rick."

"What?"

"My name is Rick; learn to call me by it." I could see the amusement in his eyes when I stood up to him.

"Whatever. This is the deal: you have to spend almost all of you time with me. No matter what."

"I know that."

"Astarte told you?"

"No, I kinda figured that when she yelled 'every waking moment' to us when we were leaving."

Imhotep stared at me for a little bit before I started to struggle against his body. Getting the hint, he stepped away. As I leaned against the wall, I tried to catch my breath while watching him to avoid another pin-up. He just stood there watching me. I felt like he was expecting me to do something.

"Why haven't you done anything?"

Did I just catch that? "What do you mean?"

"I mean, why haven't you attacked me?"

Crap, what do I say? I can't say that I love him just yet. It would be too soon. "Astarte told me that if I tried to hurt you in any way possible, I would be punished."

I could see that Imhotep didn't quite believe my hastily made story, but what else was I suppose to say? I could see him accept it for now, but I knew that he would ask again.

"You're lying. But that's not important right now. I'll show you to your rooms." He turned and began to walk briskly down the hall again. To catch up, I nearly had to power walk.

As I walked behind Imhotep, staring at the back of his head, I had to wonder….what exactly had I gotten myself into?

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There, it's done! So the names that Astarte used are in fact real. Darjaya means difficult to conquer and is Hinduism. Isidoros means Isis' gift and is Greek. Onesiphoros means favorable and is also Greek.

I suggested them.

Of course you did. I promise that I'll update soon and would still like your reviews. Please. And also, I'm sorry for the long wait.