A/N: This chapter was written for mxpw. :-)

Guide: The following scene takes place between Rogue Spy's seventh and eighth chapter.

Rogue Spy: the True Story

Or What's Really Going On With Sarah Walker

Casey's Safe House, Los Angeles

December 2, 2009

Usually, showering was synonym for a good time for Sarah.

Today, it wasn't.

The past few days had been confusing, very confusing. Sure, discovering that the Ring was the criminal organization out to kill her had been an important revelation. Of course, still being on the run from the government which thought she was a traitor was difficult. But really, it was Sarah's feelings for Carina, Chuck, and Zondra that made her head spin.

Constantly thinking back and forth between the three of them was seriously impacting her happy shower time.

Sarah put the showerhead back up in frustration, and buried her face under a stream of cold water.

She washed off one last time, before stepping out of the cubicle and drying herself.

Zondra would be arriving any minute now.

Sarah had called her when Chuck and Casey had left for Castle to grab the surveillance van. She had a relatively narrow window—they'd be gone an hour total—to see Zondra, and sort things out. Sarah hadn't been sure she'd have another opportunity, who knew what they'd find in that building. So she had called.

She'd been torn between her feelings for Carina and her feelings for Chuck for months now. And that was without counting her remaining feelings for her other ex.

Recently, the revelation of Zondra's innocence had made old, deeply buried feelings and emotions resurface. They had never really ended their relationship. Suspicion and lack of trust had drifted them apart, but the love had always been there, regardless.

Was it still?

Sarah needed to make sure before she made a decision. That was the right thing to do—the only thing to do. She owed it to Chuck, and Carina, and Zondra, and…all of them. She owed it to herself.

She opted for a simple pair of jeans and one of her old Orange Orange tank tops (finally something decent to wear) that Chuck had brought for her from Castle last night. He had kept her old clothes all these months. Sarah sighed.

Technically, she wasn't really cheating on Chuck per se. They had never said they were dating exclusively, after all. She wasn't going to do anything with Zondra anyway. She was almost sure of that. It didn't really make her feel better, though. Sarah shook her head at the sap she was seeing in the mirror.

Her thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the door.

Carefully, Sarah grabbed her gun and walked to the entrance. After checking that it was Zondra through the peephole, she put the gun into her waistband, took a deep breath and opened the door.

"Hi," she said, with a small smile. She wasn't sure what to expect from this encounter. She had some ideas, but…Sarah was confused.

"Hi," Zondra said.

Damn it, Sarah thought. Nothing had changed. She stood there a few more seconds taking in the sight before her.

Zondra had her helmet in hand. She must have ridden her bike to come here. Under her cute, black leather jacket, Zondra wore her very own tank top. Hers was black and showcased fairly more cleavage. Sarah's eyes probably not so subtly lingered on it. The tight black jeans that completed the ensemble weren't helping Sarah with her current problem either.

She moistened her lips, before finally stepping to the side to let Zondra in. She gave Sarah a knowing smile as she entered the safe house, deliberately passing her closely. Zondra had always known the affect she could have on Sarah. She still did.

"Nice place," Zondra said. "Doesn't look like CIA, though."

"It's not," Sarah answered, after closing the door. Zondra gave her a questioning look. "Long story."

Zondra delicately placed her helmet on the table, where Casey's file was still lying. Sarah had forgotten to hide it. She didn't have time to think about that, because Zondra turned fully to face Sarah, who was still standing by the door and stole all of her attention again. Suddenly, Sarah's "good friend" didn't seem so sure of herself. She almost looked nervous.

That's when Sarah realized that Zondra was nervous—just like her. Sarah may have given the look over to Zondra, but Zondra had done the same. She could see an expression in Zondra's eyes that was likely reflected in hers: lust.

This was kind of awkward.

Chuck usually was the one lightening the mood in situa—damn it, why did Sarah have to think of Chuck now? Now wasn't the time. She closed her eyes briefly, and walked to sit on the couch.

Zondra took off her jacket and joined her. Although she had left some distance between them, both seemed attracted to each other like magnets, and before Sarah could blink, they were sitting close. Too close.

"I missed you," Zondra said quietly. "I missed us."

Sarah swallowed. She could feel the blush creeping up her neck, then her cheeks, and soon her entire being would be darker than the color of her top.

"You look good, Sarah," Zondra added.

If the traitorous smile that slipped from Sarah's mouth at the compliment wasn't enough indication, her "You too" was. Sarah could feel herself falling for Zondra all over again. With the look she was giving Sarah right now, the way her lips moved when she pronounced her name, the scent of her perfume filling up the air, Sarah didn't really care. Things were going too fast, though. She changed the subject. "How have you been?"

"Good, you know," Zondra said, and she was regaining that casualness she used to display around Sarah years ago. "Missions, travels, good fights, pretty much what we used to do with the CATs."

"Yeah," Sarah said, although it hadn't been this way for her in a while. She shifted on the sofa.

"Not everything is the same, though," Zondra said, and this time, nervousness was nowhere to be found.

Sarah had a pretty good idea of what Zondra was saying, as she was picturing memories of the CAT Squad years. Missions used to be fun—and what happened after the missions hadn't been fun, it'd been way more than that.

"Really?" Sarah said idiotically. What was happening to her? She had been able to make more than one word replies before, hadn't she?

"Yep," Zondra said. "But…it could be again." She grinned at Sarah, and shifted as well, to get closer, and closer, and…closer.

Sarah couldn't move. Zondra had some sort of hypnotic power on her. That had to be it.

When Zondra's mouth crashed against Sarah's, it was like she was back in 2003 all over again—the year when Sarah and Zondra's friendship had begun to be very good. Back then, it had taken less than five minutes as well, before Sarah and Zondra were making out in a supply closet at Langley. Sensations, images, it all came back to her. It was sensual, and it had the same hint of aggressiveness it used to, even though it was soft and—what was she doing?

Zondra's hands were quick to slide under Sarah's Orange Orange tank top and graze her sides, leisurely going up. It made Sarah forget all about what she was going to try and think about.

Pushing Sarah down onto the sofa, Zondra nipped at Sarah's bottom lip, and she couldn't even tell if the moan she heard then was hers or Zondra's.

It suddenly reminded her of that time with Carina in Cancun, when—what the hell? She shouldn't be thinking of Carina right now; not when Zondra's hands were almost there. She was pissed at Carina. Her favorite red head had been right, though. Sarah was doing exactly what Carina had feared.

Sarah's eyes opened. They closed almost immediately after; Zondra's tongue was doing a pretty good job of making sure of that. As if it was a sign, however, during the brief moment her eyes had opened, they'd settled on the table where Zondra's helmet was, next to Casey's file.

Casey! He was going to arrive soon.

With Chuck.

Sarah broke away so fast it startled Zondra. She slipped out of Zondra's grasp and pushed herself off of the couch. She took two long strides to get some distance, in a hope to clear her mind.

"What's going on?" Zondra asked.

Inhaling deeply, Sarah tried to regulate her breathing. "We can't do this."

"No?" Zondra said, obviously amused. She straightened her top, taking the time to stretch in a way that would probably be inappropriate in public.

"No," Sarah said, and she looked away. She took another deep breath. "No, we can't. My partners are coming. They'll be here soon."

"Your partners?"

"Yeah, my partners."

Zondra's smile faded. "I see," she said. Her eyes suddenly took a dangerous expression. "Who is she?"

"What?"

"Your partner," Zondra said. "Who is she?" Sarah didn't say anything. "Come on, you can at least tell me who she is."

"It's nothing like that," Sarah said defensively. Why would she assume there was automatically another woman? There was, but…

"Really?" Zondra said, sounding more than skeptical. "You're not sleeping with that partner of yours?"

At that, Sarah could confidently answer that she wasn't. She and Chuck weren't there yet, and Casey…eww. Why would she even think of that? That was all wrong.

"Then, what is it?" Zondra sounded annoyed now. "Is it Carina?"

"What? No. Carina and I are over." Were they? She'd been pissed at Carina, but she couldn't just forget her like that. They had shared so much.

"But there is someone else." Zondra stood up, and crossed her arms, waiting.

There was, yes. Chuck.

It had taken Sarah time and a fair amount of heartbreak, but he was the one she had chosen all those months ago, albeit a tad forced by circumstances. That was likely why she'd never really committed to her relationship with Carina, Sarah realized now. Why she hadn't realized it before was lost on her—probably because of all the sex.

"I think you should go," Sarah said, almost surprising herself. It was time to choose.

Zondra's jaw set, and she watched Sarah for an absurdly long time—or was it a few seconds? "Are you sure?" she asked.

"I'm glad you're well, and I'm glad we put all of this nonsense behind us," Sarah said. "But…yes, I'm sure."

Sarah hoped Zondra wouldn't try to convince her some more. Her resolve wasn't the strongest about these things, and Chuck and Casey could be here anytime now.

"Fine," Zondra said, clearly unhappy by what had just happened. She grabbed her helmet and jacket in one swift movement, and was at the door even faster.

"Goodbye, Sarah."