Barney usually made a point to be fashionably late.

It was a matter of pride for him – to let the people he was supposed to be joining know that whatever they happened to be doing, it was not so important that it could start without him. He had lots of very important, very awesome things to occupy his time. He wasn't just sitting around waiting for their one "thing", whatever that "thing" might happen to be.

Tonight, however – Barney was at the point where he had no pride left.

He was waiting on the roof ten minutes before the time when he was supposed to meet Ted there.

He paced anxiously back and forth, his hands clasping his arms and rubbing them, shivering a little in the chilly breeze that swept across the rooftop. He kept glancing toward the door where Ted would appear when he arrived – but it remained empty, even when the deadline Ted had given him passed. Barney sat down on the ledge of the rooftop, facing inward so that he could keep his eye on the door – but wondering uneasily if Ted might have changed his mind.

Surely he wouldn't. He wouldn't just send me up here, just to leave me waiting out here in the cold, all pathetic and hoping and…

Crap. He hates my guts right now. He totally would do that.

Barney bit his lower lip, a sick feeling building in the pit of his stomach as he tried to decide whether or not to wait, while the minutes ticked interminably by. The tiny shred of dignity remaining to him insisted that he should leave now and go home, and forget all about Ted, if he couldn't even have the common respect to show up when he was supposed to show up.

The rest of him didn't care how pathetic it made him look. He couldn't leave – not if there was a chance that Ted might still show up.

Eventually, he did – fifteen minutes after he'd told Barney to be there. At the sound of footsteps behind him, Barney spun around, his shoulders falling with relief as he swiftly closed the distance between them.

"Ted!" He blinked back the tears that sprang to his eyes unbidden, fighting to keep Ted from seeing just how much he really cared about this meeting he hadn't expected to be granted – but not fighting very hard. "Thank you so much for meeting me here. I know you said you didn't want to hear it, but I have to tell you just how…"

"Shut up."

Ted's voice was cool and sharp – very unlike his usual tone – and Barney froze, startled, searching his former friend's eyes warily. The look of dark resentment in Ted's narrowed gaze made Barney's stomach tighten with alarm. He swallowed hard to dampen his suddenly dry mouth – but he didn't say another word.

"If you want a chance to make this up to me, Barney, for once you're gonna just keep your mouth shut and listen while I tell you how it has to work." Ted's voice softened slightly as he spoke, and Barney felt a slight measure of relief. "I've… given this a lot of thought, and… I do miss… having you around. You… you were my friend for a long time, Barney…"

"I am your friend…"

Ted closed his mouth, his lips forming a taut, angry line as without another word he headed for the door leading downstairs.

"Wait!" Barney objected, unable to keep the pleading note from his voice. "Ted, I'll shut up! I'll shut up!"

Ted stopped in his tracks, drawing in a deep breath in an exaggerated display of forced patience before turning to face Barney again and going on as if he hadn't been interrupted.

"… and as much as I'd like to just write all that off and forget about it, after the way you betrayed me – I'd like to think there's a way we could… fix things. Or, rather… a way you could fix things." The faint hint of a smile around the edges of Ted's mouth was not in the least reassuring to Barney's increasingly uneasy nerves. "You're the one who did the damage. If you want our friendship back like it was, you're the one who's going to have to earn it."

"Earn it… how?"

Barney frowned, the sick coil in the pit of his stomach tightening a little more. Ted wasn't acting like himself. Even when he was angry, Ted could never seem to fully hide the soft, sensitive heart – the vulnerability that those close to him knew so well.

Right now, there was nothing even resembling honest emotion in Ted's eyes or voice. He was cold and detached in a way that Barney had never seen him, as he glared at Barney and started to turn away again. Barney took several hurried steps forward, catching Ted's arm and spinning him around.

"Don't!" he objected. "How am I supposed to understand what it is that you want, if I'm not allowed to ask you any questions?"

Ted stared pointedly down at Barney's hand on his arm before jerking it away with a contemptuous snarl, then grabbing Barney's arm instead and jerking him closer to glare into his face. "Don't touch me," he snapped, and there was an edge of warning to his voice.

"Ted, I'm sorry, okay?" Barney flinched, hurt by Ted's words, alarmed by the slight but unexpected violence of Ted's reaction – but then shook his head, steeling himself to press forward anyway. His sheer desperation was evident in his trembling words. "I'll do whatever you want me to do to… to prove myself to you, but please… please just… be reasonable, okay? I'll do anything you want, just as long as you'll let me know what that is…"

Ted was quiet for a moment, considering Barney's words – before he turned to fully face him, a cool, thoughtful smile beginning to form on his lips as he tilted his head questioningly, his hand remaining like a vise on Barney's forearm, refusing to allow him to retreat, if he wanted to.

Barney did want to, a little – but he wasn't going to.

"Anything, Barney?" There was something dark and dangerous in his tone. "Really?"

Warning bells went off in Barney's mind, and he knew that he would pay a price if he walked into the trap that Ted was setting – because he knew better than to think that it was anything but a trap. Ted had never been so furious with him over anything before, and Barney knew that whatever Ted would require of him, it was not going to be easy. Ted had Barney right where he wanted him, and seemed to be rather enjoying that position at the moment. Barney shuddered to think what embarrassing, unpleasant task Ted might ask of him in exchange for his forgiveness.

But, as long as he got that forgiveness when it was over – Barney didn't really care.

Ted was the best friend he'd ever had, and without him over these past few weeks, Barney had found himself unbearably lonely. If performing some demeaning, difficult act would prove his loyalty to Ted and convince him to take him back, Barney was willing to go through whatever Ted would require of him. He swallowed hard, nodding slowly, his eyes wide and solemn and utterly honest as he replied in a trembling voice that was hushed, almost reverent.

"Anything. I swear, Ted. Anything you want."

Ted laughed – and there was a quiet, harsh triumph in the sound that made Barney feel as if he'd suddenly fallen from a great height, plunging into a darkness that was deeper than he could comprehend. The whole encounter had a dark, surreal quality to it. This wasn't really his best friend, wasn't really happening at all. He wasn't really so desperate and pathetic that he'd blindly place himself at Ted's mercy, without knowing what he had in mind.

Except, it was really happening… and he really was that desperate.

"Good." Ted smiled – a real, genuinely pleased smile – as he released Barney's arm, so suddenly that Barney stumbled a little, trying to regain his balance. Ted's smile slowly faded into a calm, pensive expression, as he gave Barney a slow, up-and-down, appraising look. His voice was disarmingly soft, making his words even more startling and unsettling when he spoke again.

"Get on your knees."

Barney blinked, his mouth agape for a moment as he struggled to process what Ted had just said. "Excuse me?"

Ted shrugged, the corner of his mouth quirking up slightly in amusement. "You told me earlier that you were on your knees – and you expect me to believe that's a $5,000 suit, dumbass?" Ted's smile faded again, as he explained softly, "Anyway… I think that's something I'd have to see to believe."

Barney hesitated, unnerved and a little shaken by the request. He ran a trembling hand through his hair, pacing a few steps back and forth in front of Ted before turning to face him again. "So… so I just… get on my knees, and… and that's it? You just wanna inflict a little humiliation, and we're all good again?"

Actually, this isn't so bad. I've done worse just to pick up a girl. If that's all he wants… all it's gonna take to get his friendship back… then he's a bigger pushover than I thought…

"Please, Barney." Ted let out a little scoffing sound, rolling his eyes, and his smile was cold and nasty. "We are so not even remotely anywhere close to good again." He shook his head slowly, crossing his arms over his chest in a subtle gesture of challenge. "No, this is just the first… shall we say… test of your loyalty – the first thing I'm asking of you, to see how far you're really willing to go to make this up to me."

"The… first?" Barney echoed uncertainly. "So… how many 'tests' are there?" he demanded, supplying finger quotes for dramatic emphasis.

"Don't really know yet," Ted admitted with a shrug and a wicked grin. "I'll know when we get there."

Barney's eyes widened incredulously. "But… that could be… who knows how long!"

"Yep," Ted carelessly conceded.

"And… in the mean time?" Barney frowned, shaking his head slightly in confusion.

"In the mean time, we're for all intents and purposes back to normal again," Ted explained, his expression serious and certain as he held Barney's disbelieving gaze. "The gang never needs to know anything about our arrangement. In fact, if they find out, it's automatically off. Starting tomorrow, I'll tell them we worked it out, and we'll be completely back to normal in front of them. And once you've proven yourself to me, we'll be completely back to normal all the time. But until then… I'll assume you're going to complete the arrangement, and you can hang out with us again – be a part of the group." Ted's expression hardened slightly as he continued, "But if you refuse to complete any of the tests I give you… we're done, Barney. There won't be any third chances. I'll walk out of your life and never come back."

Barney's stomach clenched at those words, though he was still trying to wrap his head around exactly what Ted was suggesting. "I… I don't know…"

"Come on, Barney," Ted coaxed him with a teasing smirk, lowering his voice enticingly and taking a couple of slow steps closer to Barney. "You know you want to. This is the chance you've been asking for."

Barney stared at him for a long moment, bewildered and uncertain. Finally, he shook his head emphatically. "No," he objected, holding up his hands and backing off a few steps. "No, there is no way I'm just… indefinitely putting myself at your…"

"Bye, Barney." Ted cut him off, without raising his voice, without a trace of anger in his tone, and turned on his heel to simply walk away.

Barney's stomach lurched with panic. He knew without being told that if Ted walked away from this, he would not get another chance. His mind raced, wrestling with the decision. He'd have to be out of his mind to accept Ted's arrangement, with no set limits on how much Ted could ask of him, and no way of knowing when he'd actually have earned Ted's forgiveness. He already had Marshall's Slap Bet hanging over his head, until Marshall finally decided to use the rest of his slaps, and if there was one thing Barney had learned from that whole ordeal, it was not to get into a similar arrangement again. If he had it to do over, he'd have chosen the ten slaps all at once, rather than having to simply wait and wonder when the next punishment was coming, with no control whatsoever over his own fate.

No, it just wasn't worth it…

Except that… it was Ted.

So, it really, really was.

And it's not like he's going to ask anything too bad of you. He doesn't have it in him. Even if he did, it's not like, if it gets to the point that it really is just too much, you couldn't just walk away then. It's not like you're signing a contract or anything. You can walk away any time you want, so… isn't it worth a shot, to get his friendship back?

Isn't anything worth a shot? It's Ted!

Ted kept his steps measured and even, forcing himself not to slow his pace and tip his hand, although his heart was sinking with every step he took, as Barney remained silent and unprotesting behind him. He really had missed Barney, though he hadn't realized it fully until he'd seen him again, waiting for him on the roof. Ted had thought that Barney would go along with his arrangement, for sure – but apparently, he'd overestimated the value that Barney placed on their friendship.

Ted had to admit that, in spite of his disappointment, he also felt a certain measure of relief as he stepped into the lighted stairwell that led back down to his apartment. He hadn't been completely sure that he'd be able to pull off his little scheme, anyway. It was hard enough being so harsh and commanding with Barney for even just a few minutes. He had no idea how he would have managed to keep it up for as long as his plan would have required.

Maybe it's for the best, really…

"Ted, wait! Wait, please!"

The strangled, desperate sound of Barney's voice brought a satisfied smirk to Ted's face – but he forced it down, remaining standing in the stairwell for a moment with his back turned to Barney before slowly, deliberately turning to face him again. He was startled, and more than a little unnerved, by the sight that met his eyes – not only because he hadn't really expected Barney to do it… but also because of what it meant.

Game on. No turning back now…

Barney was kneeling on the cold stone, one hand grasping the other arm in an embarrassed, self-conscious gesture, his eyes wide and pleading as he gave Ted a desperate, beseeching look. He was shifting uncomfortably on his knees, fidgeting nervously, his gaze darting back and forth between the floor at his feet, and Ted's impassive face.

"Okay," he whispered, his voice trembling and defeated. "Okay, Ted. I'll… I'll do it. Whatever you want."