Deep down, Barney knew that Lily was right.

He wondered what she'd say if she knew that his hypothetical – whatever Ted was to him these days – was actually Ted, and not just some random girl with whom he'd happened to make an unexpected connection. He imagined her shock, and what she might say if she knew the way that Ted talked to him, the things he did to him when it was just the two of them – and what she might say if she knew how much even the most degrading of those things turned Barney on.

He imagined that she would have a lot more to say than she'd said that day in her classroom.

But he knew, although he hated to admit it, that she was right. Things couldn't keep on going this way indefinitely, with Ted simply taking what he wanted from Barney whenever he wanted it – and playing Barney so expertly in the process that, despite the fact the he knew he was being manipulated, Barney couldn't bring himself to refuse him.

Ted knew how to do things to his body that had Barney questioning whether or not this was actually Ted's first sexual experience with a man, as he had claimed. Ted could drive all of Barney's arguments and protests into incoherent need with a single well-placed touch, and always left Barney torn between hating himself for letting this happen again, and desperate for the next time they would get a few minutes alone. The sex was absolutely mind-blowing, and that made it increasingly difficult for Barney to say no, regardless of Ted's cruelty.

But it was about more than just the sex – for Barney, anyway.

He had always craved closeness with Ted, had always wanted Ted to need him just a little bit more than he actually did. He'd always been vaguely dissatisfied in their friendship, and a little too focused on their friendship for it to really be just a friendship. And now, now that Ted was giving him a level of contact and closeness that he'd never even allowed himself to dream of – it only made his thirst more desperate for the one thing that Ted was still denying him.

Actual intimacy.

And if I ever actually said that out loud, I'd have to kill myself. And that's why there is no way in the world that I will ever do what Lily suggested, and have a talk with Ted about my feelings…

Barney grimaced in disgust at the thought.

I am actually still a dude.

But… she's right about one thing. It can't go on like this. I've got to do something, even if that something does not involve a touchy-feely conversation with another guy.

No matter how hard it is – I can't let it happen again.

"Barney?" Barney shook his head slightly, startled, as Lily's concerned voice broke through his troubled thoughts. "Barney!"

He looked away from the blue, blank television screen he'd been staring at, wondering how long it had been that way as he met Lily's eyes with a falsely bright smile.

"What?"

"We're leaving," she said, obviously repeating herself, though he'd been far too distracted to hear her the first time. "The movie's over, and we've got to work in the morning. And so do you, right?"

"Yeah," Barney agreed, nodding. "Yeah, I'm right behind you."

"See you guys tomorrow night at the bar," Marshall said with a warm, tired smile as he opened the door to Ted's and Robin's apartment and ushered Lily out ahead of him.

Barney quickly scanned the room, noticing with alarm that Robin was nowhere in sight. Ted was taking up half the sofa, his head resting on the armrest and his eyes closed as he mumbled a half-hearted response to Marshall's words.

"G'night."

Barney got up from the other end of the couch, following swiftly after Marshall and Lily. If he was quiet and quick, he could manage to slip out before Ted even realized that he was leaving – and to avoid having to deal with the confusion and temptation of where Ted seemed to try to take things every single time they were alone these days.

He had just opened the door when it was suddenly pushed out from under his hand, slammed shut again. A moment later he was shoved off balance himself by the weight of a firm, strong body behind him. Barney's free hand flew up to catch himself, just before his face would have made contact with the door. He tried to push back, to put some space between himself and Ted – but then stopped trying, drawing in a sharp gasp as Ted's hand closed lightly around his throat, Ted's breath warm against his ear, his voice hushed and a little dangerous.

"Where do you think you're going?"

Barney couldn't find the words to respond, couldn't even formulate a coherent thought.

He bit back the moan that rose in his throat as Ted's lips closed gently over the sensitive skin at the side of his neck, then parted to allow his teeth to worry the spot he'd just kissed. Barney swallowed hard, fighting his own desires, trying to remember the arguments he'd prepared for use in just such a moment – and unable to think of anything but the slow heat building low in his stomach, the need for more of what Ted was doing right now…

"Wait…" he gasped out at last, pushing back against Ted just enough to give him the space to turn around and face his friend. "Ted, wait a second…"

Ted's eyes were dark and hooded with lust as he immediately moved in close again, ignoring Barney's half-hearted protest. Barney pressed his hands against Ted's chest, trying again, but Ted just caught his wrists and pinned them over his head, moving in for another kiss.

"Ted, wait…" Barney repeated with urgency. "Wait… stop." With a supreme effort, he managed to tear his hands free of Ted's grasp, pushing the other man back a couple of steps. "We… we can't do this right now. We… need to talk…"

"No, Barney, I don't think we do..."

Ted's voice was hoarse and ragged. There was a dark, desperate need in his eyes to rival what Barney was feeling, but there was a cool smirk on his lips as he closed the distance between them once more, one hand trailing slowly down Barney's chest. Barney was immediately distracted, watching it, wondering how far that hand would go – and thus missed the motion of Ted's other hand, as it rose to roughly grasp a handful of Barney's hair and yank his head back sharply. Ted's words were harsh and biting, his lips inches from Barney's mouth, as he went on softly.

"See, you just ruin everything when you talk. I like you much better with your mouth shut, so why don't you just keep it that way until I tell you to open it?"

The low, warning tone of Ted's voice… the sharp sting at the back of his head… Ted's hand that had somehow found it's way to his hip and was now rubbing slow, insistent circles, teasing nearer and nearer to Barney's aching, traitorous cock: they were all things that Barney should have rejected, shouldn't have wanted so damn much – but he couldn't help it.

As much as he tried to deny it, this new aggressor act of Ted's was the biggest turn on he'd ever experienced.

But in the midst of it all, Lily's voice echoed in the back of his thoughts, warning him against simply falling under Ted's spell and going along with it like he had every other time so far.

Can't just let it keep happening… have to talk to him… have to find out where this is headed, what he wants from you, how he feels…

But Ted was already kissing him, his tongue roughly plundering Barney's mouth as one hand tightened in his hair to hold him in place and the other found its way to the front of his pants, groping shamelessly at Barney's swelling erection as if he owned it. Barney could feel his resolve flagging in the face of his arousal, and how easy it would be to simply slip into the pattern that had already formed – and suddenly, some part of him seemed to panic at that thought, the thought that maybe it was already too late to derail this disaster before the crash at the end of the line – and Barney tore his lips away from Ted's, gasping in just enough breath to force out the words that he knew would bring everything to a sudden, screeching halt.

"I told Lily about us!"

Ted froze for a moment, his hands going still, his eyes wide with shock – shock that was swiftly fading into murderous rage. Barney winced as his head was jerked back harder, and then his breath suddenly left him, stolen by a sharp wave of agony as Ted's other hand clenched tightly around the bulge in the front of Barney's slacks, hard fingers twisting ruthlessly as Ted shifted in closer, trapping Barney's body between his own and the door behind him.

"You did what?" Ted bit off the words, his voice trembling with mingled fury and fear.

"I d-didn't say your name!" Barney gasped out, one hand falling to grasp Ted's wrist and try to pull his hand away – but Ted only squeezed harder, giving Barney a warning look that made him swiftly withdraw his hand, holding it up in front of him instead in a trembling gesture of surrender. "Shit! Ted, please… I just n-needed some advice, that's all! She doesn't know it's you! She doesn't know anything, God, Ted, please…"

Ted's grip slowly eased, his eyes narrowed in suspicion. "What exactly did you say to her?"

Some tiny, vastly overpowered part of Barney's mind was quietly screaming that he should be careful how much he told Ted, how he phrased this – but it was a little too late for that. The pain he was in, in combination with the chilling knowledge that Ted was just one slight motion away from intensifying that pain, took away any shred of caution or restraint Barney might have still possessed, and the words seemed to just pour from his mouth in a stream of desperate, trembling babble.

"Just… just that I had this… person I'd been s-seeing, and… and I didn't know what they wanted or where it was going and what did she think I should do and she said that she thought I should talk to you and find out what this is to you before… before letting it go any farther and just… just please… just please let go, okay, Ted? Because… you're really freaking me out and I c-can't… I can't… breathe… please…"

Ted was quiet for a moment, not moving or making a sound – and then, finally, he let go of Barney completely, taking a step backward and giving him a bit of space. Barney collapsed back against the door behind him, gasping in deep, desperate draughts of air, one hand falling to press gingerly over his injured groin, while the other rested over his heart, as he struggled to regain his breath, his composure, and some shred of his tattered dignity.

Ted was silent for a long moment, and then finally broke the silence between them – with a cold, bitter laugh.

The sound sent shivers down Barney's spine, and he looked up at his friend in incredulous confusion.

"First of all…" Ted began at last, his voice quiet and soft in a way that was far from reassuring, "You're not seeing me, Barney. We're not a couple. This isn't a relationship."

The sheer contempt in his voice made Barney's face burn with humiliation, and he found himself staring at the floor, unable to meet Ted's eyes as Ted went on.

"All this is… is me, taking back just some tiny fraction of everything that you've cost me over the past few years, Barney. Just some shred of the self-respect and decency that I've lost, simply by letting a piece of trash like you be a part of my life…"

It hurt, it hurt worse than anything Ted had ever done to him physically, hurt bad enough to make Barney forget about the searing ache in his groin. Barney swallowed hard, closing his eyes against the stinging moisture building there, shaking his head slowly.

He's right. What have you ever given him besides more problems to deal with? How is he any better for being friends with you? He isn't.

Just look at him now…

"Stop," he whispered. "Just… stop…"

Ted ignored him completely, edging in slowly closer until he was completely in Barney's space again, leaving him no room to retreat.

"And secondly…"

Ted reached out a hand toward Barney's groin again, and Barney reached out to stop him, drawing in a sharp, shuddering breath in alarm. Ted caught his wrist with his other hand, pinning it back against the wall, shifting sideways to prevent Barney from trying with the other hand. Barney braced himself for the pain as he felt Ted's hand make contact again – but it didn't come. Ted's hand was incongruously gentle – teasing fingertips stroking lightly, with a mockery of affection in his voice.

"… you don't let this go any farther. You don't let me do anything." Ted leaned in close, his lips twisted up into a cruel smile that Barney felt against his cheek as he whispered, his voice hushed and certain, "I decide when this is over. Is that clear?"

Barney knew better than to argue at this point. Ted's gently invasive hand, cupped almost tenderly over his vulnerable body, was a wordless threat against anything so foolish. His shame overwhelmed him, but in that moment, Barney felt that he had no other choice. He nodded silently, swallowing back the hoarse sob that rose in his throat.

"Good," Ted said softly, drawing back a little with a pleased smile on his lips. His tone didn't change, his words calm and expectant, as he added a quiet command. "Now get on your knees."