Woot o3o I made it to six chapters! You guys should check out the derpy fanart Kitten made me if you know her on tumblr xD it's adorable and awesome~ Thanks for all the random favorites and nice comments too! Hope you guys like the chapter (lengthy yes i know that's what she said IREGRETNOTHING /shot/). Anyways, enjoy what you will! :D
Disclaimer: Again, I own nothing that has to do with Ouran High School Host Club (all Bisco Hatori's); the only thing that is MIENZ (and kitten's too at this rate I suppose lol) is Tama ;D
Kyouya woke with a start, breathing heavy and gasping. He clutched his chest and tried to calm his breathing, confused and panicking.
What's wrong with me? He asked himself, carefully sitting upright on his bed. What happened to me? Did I have a nightmare?
He looked around the room then stopped, wondering what he was looking for. There was nothing suspicious, save that his desk lamp was on. He passed his eyes over the calendar nearby and then snapped his head back to look at it.
Oh, ok, it's Sunday. Kyouya heaved out a long, heavy breath and then flopped backwards onto his pillow again. I'm still confused, what happened to me? He racked his brain for whatever it could have been that he dreamt about that had frightened him so much. I can't specifically remember anything… he thought, turning his head to the side as his chest slowly stopped heaving for air. I suppose it wasn't a nightmare, or if it was, it wasn't all that amazing. I still feel like something serious happened.
Kyouya told himself that the nagging sensation would have to wait until later when he heard his cell phone ring on his desk, the melody for a text message. As he opened the phone, he realized that he had completely and utterly forgotten something of unreasonable importance to him, although he couldn't entirely place why.
From: Suoh Tamaki
Date: March 14, 2012
Message: Good morning Kyouya! I hope you're ready to have a great day! I'll be by your place of residence in just under an hour and we'll be off to that café I told you about! –Tamaki
I forgot about this… what did I do that I forgot about THIS? Kyouya threw the phone down on the desk and ran to the bathroom to get washed up as quickly as was humanly possible.
"Kyouya, are you ok? The bags under your eyes are actually noticeable for once."
"You're not helping, Tamaki."
Kyouya sat there, relishing in the caffeinated beverage and its slow but helpful effects. He would not have been up to the task of running around compact, crowded, loud, and commoner areas such as this shopping mall with Tamaki if it weren't for this beverage.
"Aw, I was just saying," Tamaki noticeably pouted, making Kyouya want to go right back to sleep and forget the fact that he just thought about tugging on that bottom lip with his teeth. "You don't look too good. Were you able to sleep last night?"
Kyouya wanted to answer no but he honestly wasn't sure. He remembered getting into bed, waking up on the floor, and then going right back to sleep after standing up and falling onto the bed, but that was all he could bring to the forefront of his mind. The nagging sensation came back but he pushed it away for the sake of the conversation.
"I'm fine, Tamaki," he said plainly, attempting to chug the coffee, nearly burning his taste buds away. "I just didn't sleep all the way through the night."
"Oh! We should go to the food court here!" Tamaki's face suddenly lit up, much to Kyouya's dismay and yet slight liking. "Maybe you just need food!"
"In no way is anything over there even slightly healthy," Kyouya stated, attempting to reason with the eccentric blond. "Couldn't we just go to a quiet restaurant or get a pastry here? The pastries are at least reasonable looking here."
Tamaki continued to pout, becoming too much for Kyouya with his head starting to pound. Of course, when he took another long gulp of coffee Tamaki took solemn notice and his brows furrowed, worry working its way back onto his face in the form of wrinkles.
"What's wrong, Kyouya? You really don't look so good." Tamaki reached a hand out, feeling Kyouya's forehead. The young Ootori had no ability to swat his hand away; in fact, he leaned into Tamaki's hand without thinking about it, welcoming the cool feel of the blonde's hand that had not been holding hot coffee. Tamaki was taken aback by the sudden change in behavior, but he wasn't complaining and even twined his fingers into some of Kyouya's feathery hair. "If you're not feeling well, we can just take you back home."
Anything but that, please.
"No, I'll be fine," Kyouya murmured, sitting up and trying his hardest to come to his senses as he put Tamaki's hand back down on the table. "What was it that you wanted to do today again?"
"Oh, um, well," the blond stuttered, at a sudden loss for words as he looked around warily. "I was hoping we could, you know, talk?"
Then Kyouya lost all hope for having an psychologically reasonable day and abandoned his sanity in one fell swoop.
"Alright then, talk to me."
"Well, um, I just…" Tamaki looked around hesitantly again. "Did anyone come with you?"
Kyouya planted his face into the table, hands over his head as he slowly scratched his scalp, trying to relax the muscles and calm the pounding veins.
"Right, um, well…" Tamaki scratched his cheek nervously.
"You underestimate who I am, Tamaki," Kyouya stated, resting his chin on the table while still covering his head, refusing to move much farther for fear that his cranium would turn to mush. "I know you want to talk about things that aren't exactly family friendly so I made sure to scramble the signal coming from the tracker and microphones placed on both of our phones. We should be fine for the time being."
Tamaki blushed, oddly impressed by him, and then he placed his hands on Kyouya's, daring to remove them to attempt massaging his scalp. It worked wonders that the dark brunette wasn't expecting as the pulsing slowly dissipated, making Kyouya's head warm. He unexpectedly groaned with approval, startling Tamaki into stopping, causing them both to smile and laugh.
"When did you learn how to do that?" Kyouya asked, trying his hardest to verbally wave away the embarrassing noise he'd made, blinking a few times as he felt more awake than he had the moment before.
"I didn't, I just do that to myself sometimes when I have headaches," Tamaki answered, blushing again. "I'm glad I could help, then!"
Kyouya felt his face become warm at the sentiment and when he glanced across Tamaki's face and caught sight of his lips, twisted up into that awkward smile. It took a very painful and quick second to tear his eyes away and look back to his coffee, drinking the rest of it as quickly as was possible without giving his tongue anymore serious burns.
"Hey, how about we get some pastries and go to the small park they have out here?" Tamaki asked, standing up and changing it to a statement instead of an invitation. "It's such a beautiful day out, we shouldn't be cooped up inside for too long! I'll even get you another cup of coffee if you'd like!"
He grabbed Kyouya's wrist, all but dragging him up to the front counter and ordering them both white chocolate mochas and a half dozen white-chocolate-cranberry cookies. As soon as they were outside, Kyouya noticed that his head no longer hurt and that his hand felt oddly at home in Tamaki's. He didn't even feel like letting go just yet, even though a few girls were eyeing them and giggling.
"Doesn't this feel amazing?" Tamaki asked, cross legged in the grass as the breeze came through. His jeans were sure to get stained the way he was constantly turning this way and that, looking at birds and squirrels and butterflies flit across his field of vision.
"I think I have to agree that it does," Kyouya answered, nibbling on a cookie as he tried his hardest not to stare at the way the breeze played with Tamaki's hair. Not to mention the way that the weeping willow they were sitting beside had flitting shadows of its wispy branches dancing around him, creating an almost elf-like quality that surrounded the blond.
This moment could be something straight out of a horrible romance novel that Tamaki himself would have written. Kyouya thought, turning away when Tamaki's gaze came back to him—only after watching a squirrel run past them after another. I'm going to utterly ruin this beautiful moment with one of the only interesting people I know… because we don't have the life I'm sure he wishes we had.
He put his coffee down between them, brushing his pinky across Tamaki's hand, causing him to jolt his hand away. Tamaki looked at him then, joy erased and eyes wide, joyful laughter gone only to be replaced with a probing silence.
"Kyouya," Tamaki started, looking away to the small pool ahead of them. "Do you still consider me your friend?"
This was utterly surprising, though Kyouya couldn't place why just yet with his uneven heart rate clouding his ability to think.
"I do, Tamaki," he answered truthfully, reminding himself that there was no place for his usual sanity in this day. Then he decided to continue. "There's more than that though, and I hope you understand that."
Tamaki whipped his head around to face Kyouya, the sad look of open hope plastered to his eyes. "Then—"
"That's where it has to stop though," Kyouya said plainly, locking his eyes on Tamaki's. "You know that, and I've tried to make that clear to you, but you don't listen to me and neither do I."
Tamaki stared, confused, the lost expression in his eyes slowly burning away what semblance of happiness Kyouya had been feeling before.
"I still don't understand," Tamaki said, grabbing Kyouya's hand.
"What don't you understand then?" Kyouya asked, daring to not fight Tamaki's grasp. It was all he had to hold on to at the moment, with the way that the blond was holding his eyes with something akin to a glare.
"It doesn't have to be something showy or even emotional," Tamaki stated, bringing Kyouya's hand to his cheek. "We don't have to be a couple; I know that's what you're most worried about. At first that's what I worried the most about too but I've thought and reasoned as best I could with myself since then."
Kyouya's breathing hitched as his hand touched Tamaki's cheek. The blonde's skin was soft, only attained by a life of luxury and petty worries about photo albums. He looked Tamaki in the eyes and saw a different worry, a kind of passionate response.
A compromise.
"You don't have to love me, you don't even have to be friends with me anymore," Tamaki said. Then Kyouya felt his will tip off the cliff when he felt those lips brush his fingertips. The fire that lit inside of Tamaki's eyes was soon ignited in Kyouya's chest. "I need you, and I can tell you feel the same way. You can have me; I'm all yours. If you don't want to be in a relationship with me, then you could just use me for the sake of not making fools out of ourselves in the future when we can no longer handle the space between us!"
As everything inside of Kyouya seemed like it was boiling out of his chest, he latched onto the back of Tamaki's neck and brought his face closer.
"Then I will use only this moment to its full potential," Kyouya whispered, staring into the blonde's baby blues. "I will not use you, even though that would greatly benefit me."
He quickly and carefully placed his glasses onto the grass between them, then closed his eyes and moved forward, scared, as he placed his lips atop Tamaki's.
There was a quick jolt of adrenaline, a rush of satisfaction, and then his consciousness clouded over and everything else was sealed off. This was their only moment and Kyouya honestly didn't care within the span of that breath whether anyone was watching.
Why does this feel so familiar? He thought, pulling away from Tamaki, gazing into the shocked eyes as they became full of the same level of need.
Tamaki cupped the dark brunette's face into his hand and forced their lips to meet again. It became increasingly frantic, needy, hands grabbing clothing, lips mashing together on the verge of turning into biting. Then Tamaki's other hand went from balancing himself on the grass to grabbing Kyouya's thigh, squeezing all too close to a part of him that was becoming more and more heated with each frantic meeting of their lips. As Kyouya began to remember to breathe, Tamaki slid his tongue across the brunette's bottom lip, begging an entrance to which Kyouya quickly obliged, tangling a hand into the blonde's hair as their tongues glided across each other's.
I want this. Kyouya thought, carefully leaning forward into Tamaki's touch, his lips slowly treading down from his mouth to his neck, making the blond shiver. I absolutely need this.
Tamaki thought he would lean forward, encourage Kyouya to trace further down his neck with those velvet lips, but gravity felt like listening to Murphy's Law. When he leaned forward, Kyouya's face slid over his shoulder while Tamaki's hand on the thigh fell right on top of Kyouya's groin in order to stop from falling directly on top of him. That quick grab, a reflex Tamaki couldn't believe kicked in right then, set everything off inside of Kyouya's mind.
Oh, that's why. The Ootori thought as everything smashed through the walls of his unconscious and flung itself into his current train of thought, mingling with his need for Tamaki and transforming into a strong urge to flit his own hand onto that awkward bulge underneath his friend's pants. I remember everything. I remember Tama. I remember my overwhelming need and now he's right in front of me.
Kyouya forced himself to back away despite his wandering hand, eyes darting about the ground, hand on top of Tamaki's in an attempt to remove it from his most excitatory organ, though he was unsure of whether or not he truly wanted to move his hand away.
"Tamaki," he breathed, watching the other's slow, heavy breathing hitch in his throat in terrified anticipation of denial. "You are definitely a pervert."
He loved the shade of pink, then the shock of red that covered the blonde's cheeks and ears. It hurt everything inside of him that he couldn't act on that, couldn't really smile, and couldn't laugh when Tamaki retorted.
"Look who's talking!" Tamaki looked down, blond locks drooping over his eyes. "You're the one leading me on here!"
"I'm not trying to," Kyouya managed, trying to keep his voice steady, preparing for the worst not only from Tamaki but from himself. "This is where it begins and ends Tamaki. No matter what, we can't afford to do whatever we want with each other; you have to know that. No opportunity is worth seeing you fall because of me."
The look on Tamaki's face tore Kyouya's remaining semblance of a heart to pieces when he said, "It would be worth it though… because you'd be with me at the bottom, wouldn't you?"
Soooooo? o3o~ any comments, questions, ideas, and whatnot? 8D