Disclaimer: If I owned anything, I would have made YRP into Barbies by now. Tidus would make a good Ken… I would've had more fun as a little kid! I miss being really young.

A/N: Thanks for all the lovely reviews! They inspire me to write more, and fast! Heh. This one wasn't quick enough, I know. I'm working on kicking it up a notch, no worries. Glad you liked the last chapter, and hopefully you'll like this one as well. I'm also writing the default chapter of another Tidus / Yuna fic. Hehe, I just put one up, and I have another idea. If it works out okay, I'll post it. I'm not quite sure I've developed a good way to begin it yet, but I won't bore you with the details. haha.

liz

ALSO, as this chapter takes place at Rikku's house, you may want to bring up an Al Bhed Translator online by googling "al bhed translator". Everything is pretty self- explanatory, but it's finnier if you have one up, in my opinion. A good site to use is www. pixelscapes . com /twoflower/albhed.html and I don't own that either. take out the spaces. :)

Living with the Enemy- Chapter Eight

Yuna hung up with Rikku, and climbed slowing out her closet, trying not to rustle her clothes and cause too much noise. She had a lot of work to do if she wanted to snag Tidus. He was, after all, extremely popular with girls, and he knew it, too. Contemplating her bubbly Al Bhed cousin's advice, she asked herself a question she had kept in the back of her mind all day and refused to acknowledge. What really would be the purpose? Their parents were getting married soon… If Tidus and Yuna had a relationship in the remainder of the three weeks they were to spend alone together, it would certainly make the whole brother/ sister thing harder than it would be without any sort of… Yuna's mind searched for the right word. It would be a hell of a lot harder if things got physical. A "normal" sister and brother didn't go off and make out when their parents were too busy canoodling to notice. Standing up, stepping out of her closet, and brushing off, Yuna made a decision. She definitely needed help, not over-the-phone, rushed advice. She grabbed her purse, put her cell phone snugly inside and walked to Tidus's room.

Knocking gently on the frame of the door to announce her presence, Yuna gingerly stepped into Tidus's room. "Hey," she said softly. Tidus was sprawled on his bed, reading something Yuna vaguely recognized as a blitzball strategy book. Tidus looked lazily up at her.

"What's up?" he asked casually.

A twinge of a smile twitched at Yuna's lips. He was so comfortable in his own skin, so confident, so appealing. Holding back the raging emotions working inside her, she steadily answered, "I'm stopping by Rikku's for a while. I have my cell if you need anything."

Teasingly grinning up at her, he replied, "I know I should probably have my girlfriend's number by now, but I don't."

In a rush, Yuna told Tidus she would leave it on the kitchen counter, hurriedly scribbled it down, and then headed out the door. If she ever needed Rikku, she needed her now. Through all her problems throughout the years, whether it was someone throwing sand in her eyes at the chocobo farm when she was six, or tips for kissing when she was twelve, to Seymour advice when she was fifteen, Rikku had always been there for Yuna. Yuna needed Rikku now, more than ever, because, just then, in Tidus's bedroom, she had to resist the urge to pounce on him and give him her love- all her love.

Not even bothering to knock on the Sycdan-Dreav's, Yuna let herself in with the key her Al Bhed uncle had given her when she was still as tall as his knee. Although it was late, she knew she was welcome in their home at any time. The only rule Cid had ever set out for her was to talk to him in all Al Bhed when she set foot on his premises. Proud of their heritage, the Sycdan-Dreav family was careful to show it off. Instead of the standard "welcome" mat at the front step, Rikku had made a feather and bead mat with 'FAMLUSA!' scrawled across it. Every time Yuna saw Rikku's string of exclamation points after the Al Bhed word for welcome, she smiled at her cousin's bubbly, free-spirited nature. "Ihlma Cid? Rikku? Yna oui rana? Ed'c sa, Yuna!"

Greeting her mother's brother's family and not expecting much of an answer, Yuna plodded into the house and to Rikku's room. Opening the door, Yuna saw Rikku, her face almost purple from lying upside down reading her magazine. "Hey Yunie!" Rikku squeaked as she tumbled off her bed. As normal color was restored to Rikku's face, she showed Yuna the shoes Seventeen magazine was selling that she simply had to have.

Plopping down on one of the many bean filled pillows in Rikku's room, Yuna began to spill all of her troubles to Rikku.

"I'm having this huge problem, Rikku. Tidus is just killing me. I like him so much. He's the first guy- ever – to really care about me. He protected me from Seymour, and beat him up for me. He got suspended for me, pretended to go out with me, and let me sleep with him!"

Rikku broke in with a giggle. "Yeah, that was a classic Yunie. So what's the problem? He's your perfect guy."

Yuna stared blankly at Rikku. "Um, rammu? Hello? Our parents are getting married. We're gonna be brother and sister. Pnudran yht cecdan! Yevon, that's like you going out with Brother!"

Rikku looked at Yuna blankly. "No, it's not. You and Tidus aren't blood related. Plus, your parents aren't married yet. They could still change their minds."

"Fine," Yuna retorted. "Let's imagine for a minute that Tidus and I could go out."

Rikku held up her hand. "Hang on, Yunie. I need to visualize this." Yuna groaned when she realized what was coming. Rikku reached under her bed and pulled out her humongous storage bin full of Barbies.

"I know what you're thinking, Yunie. I really should use those moogles and plushies I have instead, but you look more like Besaidian Beach Barbie than a stuffed animal with black wings, a big nose, and a red ball dangling from its head." Glancing up at Yuna, she added, "Don't tell Lulu that I don't like those moogles she gave me."

As Rikku pulled out the Besaidian Beach Barbie with hair cut by Rikku herself, just to match Yuna, and Perky Blonde Bombshell Party Barbie with beaded hair, Yuna did have to admit they resembled her and Rikku. Tossing Yuna the doll version of herself, Rikku commanded, "Dress her up!" Sighing, Yuna did as told. Searching through the pile of Barbies for a cute top to dress up "Little Yunie" as Rikku called it, her bi-colored eyes managed to locate a cute white wrap shirt, a black bikini top to use as a bra, a long blue skirt, some white but tinted pink kimono armlets, and black boots.

"Interesting," commented Rikku, who had dressed her doll in a yellow bikini top, a green cargo skirt, and a utility belt. "I thought you would've spiced it up a little more, like usual, since it is Barbie, and she can walk around naked if she wants!"

Almost to herself, Rikku added, "What a life!"

Getting back to business, Rikku began rummaging through her box again. "Now we just have to find a suitable Ken to be Tidus! We'll probably need to find one with the non-painted on hair…" After a few minutes, Rikku found a suitable surfer-looking Ken with wild hair that was not painted on his head, but she still needed to find him some shorts. Tossing her Ken, Rikku told Yuna, "There's scissors on my desk. Cut his hair."

"What? Why?"

Snatching Tidus-Ken from Yuna's hands, Rikku pointed to his head. "Look at his hair! It's all flat and icky! Tidus has very fine, choppy, layered hair! Have you not noticed this? Granted his hair isn't as extraordinarily shiny and shimmery as Squall's, but still. You should have seen that right off!" Blinking, Yuna again obeyed and picked up the scissors and attempted to chop up Ken's hair to match Tidus's. Eyeing her, Rikku sadly shook her head, gently took the scissors out of her favorite cousin's hands, and suggested the poor brunette look for pants in the Barbie container. Just as Yuna found a pair of shorts that weren't too short and didn't have a weird, squiggly print on them, there was a knock on Rikku's bedroom door.

"Lusa eh!" Rikku called out. "Come in!"

Black and purple cell phone in one hand and leather handbag in the other, Lulu entered the room with her usual dark grace.

"MIMI!" Rikku cried excitedly in Al Bhed. "You came!"

Giving Rikku a nod, Lulu looked at Yuna and swept her into a motherly hug. "You poor child," she murmured, "having to go through all this in such a stressful period of your life." Pulling away from Yuna and studying her face, Lulu gently asked, "Are you okay?"

Yuna gave a slight nod then replied, "How did you know I was going to be here?"

"Rikku called me. She didn't tell me you were coming, but she told me about your certain feelings for your soon-to-be step-brother, and she asked me to come over and help formulate a plan."

Yuna eyed them both carefully. "A plan? What sort of plan?"

"I don't know. Rikku didn't really tell me. Why don't you fill us in…?" Lulu's voice drifted away as she saw the Barbies on the floor. "Yevon help us. Please, Rikku… not again!"

While Lulu was talking, Rikku had pulled Gothic Rebel Barbie out to play Lulu. The Barbie version did bear a striking resemblance to her, with fair skin, purple lipstick, dark hair, and fiery eyes. It was Rikku, however, who drew on a little mole just above the doll's lip with ballpoint pen.

"But Mimi, it helps me concentrate and formulate plans better!"

"First of all, Rikku," Lulu replied, "if you call me by my Al Bhed name one more time, I'll use yours. I'll call you Neggi in front of everyone!"

Rikku's eyes widened at the dreaded name. Ever since Lulu and Yuna had learned about her real name, Neggi, they had teased her. Every time Rikku heard that name, she shuddered. It reminded her of eggy, which made her think of eggs, which were her second worst fear, behind lightning. They were just so… slimy.

Satisfied by Rikku's terrified expression, Lulu continued on. "Second, why do we have to use these plastic, stereotype-making dolls? Did you know that if Barbie was a real person, her body is so out of proportion that she wouldn't even be able to stand up? Barbies send messages to women everywhere that women are things to be used by men…"

The corners of Yuna's mouth twitched upward. Every single time Rikku brought out her beloved Barbies, Lulu would lecture her on their evils. Yuna knew that what Lulu said was partly true, but she sympathized with her green-eyed cousin. Barbie was the only femininity Rikku had in a houseful of boys, unless you counted Brother's... different behavior. No matter how straight he was, people often classified him as gay because of his feminine ways. Still, Rikku clung to her Barbies as if it was an inflatable Barbie life raft to keep her from sinking in a sea of testosterone.

Breaking into the fight, Yuna stepped in between the two feuding friends. Rikku had been muttering Al Bhed curses at Lulu, since Lulu didn't fluently understand Rikku's native language, and Lulu had been wildly threatening to use her Black Magic to roasty toast poor mini-Rikku, aka Perky Blonde Bombshell Party Barbie.

"You guys," Yuna interrupted, "I have a problem here. You both have come together to help me, and if Barbies are going to be the one to help fix my problem, no matter how sexist they seem, Lulu," Yuna added when she saw her friend about to protest, "then so be it."

Sighing, Lulu obliged. With her white, lithe fingers, she gingerly picked up Gothic Rebel Barbie. Holding her by the incredibly arched, plastic foot, Lulu asked Rikku, "I don't have to dress like a slut, do I?"

Laughing, Rikku replied, "When does Barbie ever dress like a slut?"

Seeing Lulu about to start crusading against the plastic childhood pleasure once again, Yuna neatly cut in. She held up a black and purple pinstriped business suit and skirt. "How about this, Lulu?"

Ruby eyes flashed over the outfit for a moment. Snatching the suit from Yuna, she pointed her long-nailed finger at her. "I am compromising everything I believe in for you. I sincerely hope you appreciate it."

Yuna grinned. "You know I do, and you know I'd do the same thing for you."

A smile twitched slightly at Lulu's lips as she dressed her doll, because she knew, above all things, friendship came first, and her two best friends would sacrifice anything for her, just as she was doing for Yuna.

"All rightie now," Rikku began once again, noticing Lulu's faint sign of approval. "We can start by introducing our complete cast: Besaidian Beach Barbie as Yunie!"

Yuna, giggling a little, strutted her doll into the playing space Rikku had cleared on the messy floor. With some difficulty, she bent the mini-Yuna's legs and sat her down on Rikku's shag rug.

"Next we have Gothic Rebel Barbie as Lulu, our black mage!" Lulu halfheartedly walked mini-Lu into the arena and sat down next to Yuna.

Rikku rattled off the next couple of characters fairly quickly. "Our hunky hero Tidus will be played by Star Blitzer Ken, with his pals, Squall and Wakka played by Hot 50's Greaser Ken and Zookeeper Ken. 50's Greaser Ken had Squall's signature leather jacket, and using half of brother's hair gel, Zookeeper Ken sported Wakka's gravity-defying hairdo.

"As for tonight's evil scary villain guy," Rikku continued, Ugly Guado Ken with tattoos applied by yours truly and sponsored by Issaru's Magic Marker Company plays Seymour!

"Instead of strutting him down the runway, Rikku chucked him, and he landed in Tidus's lap.

"Oops," she said as she laughed almost evilly, and then continued on.

"Finally, for our last, but most definitely not least character, we have Perky Blonde Bombshell Party Barbie, arriving in her red convertible with real radio. This young starlet will play the positively gorgeous Rikku, cousin and co-best friend to our heroine." As the car pulled up, Rikku hit the radio button in the Barbie car, and Aqua's Barbie Girl began to play.

Smiling sunnily, Rikku began to sing along. "I'm a Barbie Girl, in a Barbie World! Life in plastic—it's fantastic!"

Yuna hit the radio button again to turn off the song before Lulu could hear, "Undress me everywhere," and blow her top.

"Hey!" Rikku whined.

"Let's move onto the plan," Lulu suggested firmly.

"Okay!" agreed the blonde, bouncing up and down in her seat. "What you need to do, Yunie," she told her cousin, "is convince Tidus he already does like you, like I said before."

Picking up mini-Yuna, Rikku meandered her past Tidus. Stopping her and slowly turning her around to face Ken, Rikku imitated Yuna's voice.

"Hi, Tidus!" she cried. "Since you and I are gonna be all alone for the next few weeks, I think we should go swimming!"

Switching back to narrator, Rikku said in a deep voice, "While in their back yard, when Tidus is attempting to teach Yunie blitzball, he accidentally hit her in the head.

"Ooh, the pain," Yuna moaned in her best Barbie voice.

Lulu really did hit her on the head at that point. "Yuna, that sounded just plain dirty."

Rubbing her sore head, Yuna replied, "Well, sorry! It is Barbie, after all."

Clearing her throat loudly for silence, Rikku paused for a moment, giggled, then continued. "Faking drowning, Yunie splashed around a bit dramatically, messes up her hair, but Tidus, being Mr. Macho Hero, comes to save her. Pretending to be unconscious, Tidus must perform mouth-to-mouth improvisation."

Lulu, reluctantly getting into the game, draped Yuna down helplessly as the real Yuna placed Tidus's plastic mouth over her painted on one.

"Breathe into her Tidus!" Rikku cried. "Pnehk ran du meva!"

Just as Yuna was beginning to regain consciousness, the real Yuna's cell phone rang.

"Rammu?" Yuna asked, speaking into it.

"Hey, Yuna," a deep voice said effortlessly. "I think you may want to come home now, 'cause my old man and your mom called, said they were heading over."

"Oh, hey Tidus," Yuna replied. Rikku began to laugh uncontrollably at this point, and was soon rolling on the floor as Yuna tried to hold her composure.

"How long do you think I have before they get there?"

"Eh, I'd say about ten minutes. You'd better haul ass, too, because we're not supposed to be out."

"All right, I'll be right over."

"Later," Tidus replied, and Yuna heard the click of the phone line and hung up.

"Guys, I have to run, but, I'll call and we can figure out some more ideas."

Rikku laughter had died down to occasional snorts, but she picked up Mini-Yunie, and began to brush her messed up hair. Just as the brush was getting a particularly tough tangle out, Yuna's head popped off. This sent Rikku into a quiet pause for a moment, then another round of loud pealing laughter.

Mildly, Lulu commented, "I guess life in plastic isn't so fantastic."

Racing home, Yuna hoped her mother and soon to be step-daddy weren't there yet. The whole purpose of these three weeks was to form a better brother/sister relationship with Tidus, and she had been forbidden to go over to friends' houses. Then again, she wasn't exactly forming a sibling relationship with Tidus either… Why didn't Jecht and Utada remember that Tidus was incredibly… irresistible? Did they want them to go out?

Pulling into the driveway to the house, Yuna saw that Jecht and Utada had not arrived yet, but she still raced inside. They could pull up any second, and she didn't relish being grounded on top of suspension. In her hurry, she smacked into Tidus.

Covering her mouth with both hands, Yuna's eyes widened, then relaxed. She just bumped into him. It wasn't that big a deal. "Sorry," she said, as she slowly lowered her hands from her mouth. "I didn't see you there."

"What a way to make an entrance," Tidus commented, then continued. "Looks like my old man and Utada are going to be a little late." Rolling his eyes, he added, "They had a craving for fried chocobo and chocolate covered strawberries."

Yuna shook her head in silence. What on Earth had she sped home for, then? "Where did they go to eat? It's already 10:30!"

"You know room service is always open with such delicacies."

"Excuse me?"

Tidus sighed. Slowly, he looked at Yuna and said, "They're stopping by tomorrow. I was going to call you, but then you pulled in. They're staying at the Bed and Breakfast Besaidia, Room 201, and they just called to tell me."

Yuna's mouth dropped open in disbelief. The Bed and Breakfast Besaidia was $350 for a room on the first floor. On the second floor, where Jecht and Utada were staying, you got a suite, and it cost you an extra 150 gil. What's more, Yuna's father, Braska, had offered to take Utada there one year for a get-away, but Utada had refused, vowing never to waste hard-earned gil on such an overrated place.

"Yeah, I know," Tidus said, seeing Yuna's shocked face. "You think they wouldn't need a vacation from living like royalty with us gone."

Even though it was not quite what Yuna had been thinking, she agreed with him anyway, then changed the topic. Thinking about Jecht and Utada at a Bed and Breakfast was not high on her list of things to ponder.

Stretching her arms high above her head, she yawned a little yawn.

"Are you tired?" Tidus asked, his cerulean eyes showing no sign of weariness.

"Not really," Yuna replied. "I feel a little drained emotionally, but, that's it."

"Cool," he replied, and proceeded to make himself a sandwich. Yuna, disappointed that their conversation was over, walked into the living room and sunk deep into the heavily cushioned couch. Why didn't she get some more useful info out of Rikku? How did she make realize she was the best girl he's ever laid eyes on? Closing her eyes, she tried hard to remember all the things Rikku had taught her over the years, but failed. Leaning her neck back against the head of the couch, she sighed deeply, and then she felt a smoof beside her. Tidus had brought his snack and had sprawled down next to her.

"I've been thinking lately," he said before taking a monstrous bite out of his sandwich, which she noticed, was loaded with three kinds of meat.

"Yeah?" she said in response.

"Brothers and sister look out for each other, ya know? I think we've got that nailed, considering what's happened and all, but…" he trailed off and chewed thoughtfully.

"Tell me," Yuna encouraged him.

"After all that mess you had with Seymour, you deserve someone better, and one great relationship. Yuna, I'm going to find the prefect guy for you."

Smiling almost sadly, Yuna easily answered, "And I'll find the perfect girl for you."

all rightie, gonna go post this now. next chapter will be up soon if you REVIEW!

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