Chapter four of Ambition! Yay! Julia yells at Ellis, Eileen at Derek, and Tom is all good and helps Ivy.
By the way, guys? Who here is really mad at Ivy after The Cost of the Art? Because I went onto my tumblr and like the entire page was filled with hate stuff on Monday night. I'm beginning to think it's effecting my number of readers. Hasn't gone up much for a while… the stories about Karen have. Idk…
I thought she was being kinda mean to Karen and all that, but she
A) Didn't deserve all that hate (someone said they hate her more than Ellis!) and
B) Has some good reason to be that insecure about Marilyn. I heard Karen will be replacing her next week and I also thought Derek was kinda being a jerk all "there's nothing safe about being a star!" then going off to have sex again.
So yeah… anyways, (shut up, me) read on!
Marilyn the Musical…
Julia's POV
I was furious when I found out Ellis overheard Ivy talking to Karen. I expected her to go to Karen, she really needs a friend right now and having someone there could help her. I walk into Tom's office and sure enough I find exactly who I'm looking for, Ellis. "do you realize what you've done?"
"What did I do this time?" he says, trying to sound as innocent as possible.
"I think you know what you did" I reply, trying to stay calm but it's not exactly working.
"Is this about Ivy?" he asks.
"yes! it's about Ivy"
"I didn't think Derek would get that mad at her..." he says. Wow, he must not know Derek like he says he does or else he wouldn't have said that. Derek is furious, he tried to fire the poor girl.
"why did you tell him? that was something for her to tell, and no one else" I ask, hopefully making sense to him that this is a serious issue for Ivy and she needs to keep it in her hands.
"I didn't want him to do something with the choreography that could hurt her again" he replies, trying to act like he cares, when really, I don't think he does.
"you should have gone to her first. now she's scared and has no idea what she's going to do"
"I'm sorry... I wasn't thinking when I told him and it was stupid" he tells me, in an attempt to apologize.
"I think I just might have to fire you for real this time" I snap, I'm furious with him right now.
"Please don't fire me! I really wanna be a part of this..." he begs.
"you screwed up once and you really screwed up with Ivy, you hurt her Ellis" I remind him, I don't think he realizes the magnitude of what he's done.
"I'm sorry! I didn't mean for that to happen" he apologizes again, sounding like a little kid who just got busted by his mother.
"try apologizing to Ivy, did you know that Derek wants nothing to do with the baby? that she has to do this alone?" I practically yell at him. He's quiet. Good, I think he realizes what he's done.
"you're walking a really thin line Ellis. no more eavesdropping or whatever it is that you were doing when you found out"
"Alright.." he says, making his way out of the room. I slouch down in Tom's chair, texting him and asking for Starbucks, I need something to get me through the rest of the day if I'm gonna have to argue with more idiots.
Derek Wills' POV
I'm working on another song when Eileen comes walking over, looking angry.
"DEREK!" she yells.
This is ridiculous. How many times have I been interrupted during rehearsals now? First that way-too-gay-to-be-straight assistant of Tom's shows up, telling me he heard Karen and Ivy talking, then Tom yells at me, and now Eileen's here. I bet it's about Ivy again.
"What?" I basically yell back, exasperated and annoyed.
"What's going on with Ivy?" Eileen demands. I knew it. I'd be so much better off if I never got involved with that blonde and just cast her as Marilyn and be done with it.
"She can't be Marilyn," I say flatly.
"Why?"
"She's pregnant," I tell her.
"Seriously?" Eileen looks pretty mad about the whole situation now. This is ridiculous, why do they all care about Ivy so much?
"Yeah. I'm not going to let her be Marilyn unless she gets an abortion or something…" I really don't care what she does, but if she keeps it I'm not letting her be Marilyn. Unless she gets rid of it, Karen's the new Marilyn.
"I doubt she'll get an abortion," Eileen says.
"Last time I saw her she said she would do anything for the lead," I point out.
"Really? Even sleep with you? Cuz I'm pretty sure you're the dad," Eileen says, still looking mad.
"Yeah I already talked to her about that," I say.
"And?"
"I don't want anything to do with it. If she's gonna have it she'll be doing it herself," I tell her.
"That's ridiculous," Eileen says irritably, crossing her arms.
"I'm not going to help with this."
"Why?" she asks, looking at me.
"I don't want anything to do with that baby," I tell her.
"So what is she gonna do?" Eileen asks.
"Whatever she's gonna do about it. I don't really care," I say, making it sound like I really don't care. I can't say that I'm interested, but I do need to know what she does do, as the director and also as the father considering everybody else holds me responsible.
"Really, Derek? I think you'd be a little more supportive," Eileen says, still annoyed.
"Why should I be?" I ask her.
"You're the father!" she snaps.
"I just said I don't care about that baby and I don't. I don't want anything to do with it and Ivy can do whatever she wants about it!" I yell, getting really annoyed with everyone talking about this.
"So who's gonna be marilyn now?"
"Karen."
"Okay," Eileen says, "Just don't sleep with her"
"She wouldn't anyways," I say back.
Eileen sighs. "And Ivy would?"
"It's not like I forced her to," I reply.
"And it got her pregnant!" she yells at me "That's ridiculous."
"I didn't think she'd get knocked up!" I yell back.
"You're crazy."
"It's the truth," I tell her.
"Whatever. Just don't do anything to hurt Karen," Eileen says, walking off.
"I won't. She's not anywhere near as desperate as Ivy was," I say.
"Really?" Eileen comes back over to me.
"Ivy had been on the stage for ten years in the ensemble. She was desperate for a lead," I explain, Karen hadn't felt as desperate to get a lead, she just really wanted it is more than anything else I could say for her. She didn't act like she needed it.
"I know that!"
"Karen's not like that. She's never going to go that far for anything," I say.
"You sure?" Eileen asks, walking away.
I know Karen wouldn't do that the same way Ivy did. Karen wanted to be Marilyn, and she worked her ass off to get the chance, but she didn't seem to want it quite as much as Ivy did. When Ivy got it, the sex helped, but it wasn't all there was to my choice.
When Ivy sang at that audition, she sang with a fiery passion for the part, and when she did her readings she had been studying Marilyn to know everything about the role she wanted. Karen never tried half that hard, though she did put her efforts of the same amount into her dancing, but Ivy knew her character by the callback, which in the end was just what we needed for Marilyn.
Ivy Lynn's Apartment…
Ivy Lynn's POV
I've been crying again. I hate calling my mom so much, and this is exactly why. No matter what I tell her, she gets mad at me. First I told her I was going to play Marilyn and she just talked about my brother. Now I called her when I needed her and she just yelled at me. All I wanted from my mom was love and I've never gotten it. All she does is concentrate on my career and push me harder. I was supposed to be a Broadway star, not a would-be lead and a seasoned chorus girl, and she won't fully accept me until I fulfill her dreams.
I just really need to talk to someone. Anyone. I can't call Julia again, and I don't think she needs to know how calling my mom went. I'll just call Tom, he's one of my closest friends since I started performing in Heaven on Earth. That's how I got to know him, actually. He and Julia were starting to make Heaven on Earth and they needed people to try out their new music. I got a job with their ensemble and Tom and I hit it off from the beginning. He's probably one of the people I talk to most when I need someone.
"Hey Ivy…" he says as he picks up.
"Hey…"
"Everything okay?" he asks, sounding a little concerned.
"I told my mom," I say sadly, having finally stopped my crying.
"How'd that go?" he asks.
"She basically said I ruined my chances at getting the lead," I tell him. She's probably right, too. I'm not Marilyn so what else do I have? Nothing. And I probably won't get anything else after this all blows over either…
I can hear Tom sigh. "No, you didn't. Julia's gonna adopt your baby and then we're gonna try to get you a lead here or somewhere else."
The thing is, I'm still not sure if that's actually what I want to do. I know I made it sound like I did, and it would be the best choice for everyone, but that doesn't mean that I'm sure that's what I really want.
"It's gonna be okay…" Tom says reassuringly.
"Maybe I just shouldn't go through with all of this…" I suddenly say, it being the first thing I can think of saying.
"Why are you saying that?"
"If I don't have it I still have a shot at being Marilyn…" I say. I'm not entirely sure this is that good of an idea either, but the risks of anything happening are really low from what I've heard, and then I could just keep being Marilyn. My mom and the press would never even have to know.
"Really, Ivy?" Tom asks, "Are you thinking about having an abortion…"
"We could all just pretend this never happened," I tell him, beginning to wonder if this would be a better idea than having it but letting Julia adopt it… but even abortions are pretty pricey and I don't think I have the money to spare for even that. I guess I could ask Derek since he's the one that told me to get rid of it, but I don't think he'd be very happy with losing money on it either.
"I just think you're upset right now," Tom says, "Have you talked to your doctor since the hospital?"
"No, I haven't gotten to it yet…" And I never go to the doctor. Just another part of saving money to pay the rent. Being an actress, I really have to watch how much money I spend to make sure I can pay the rent by the time it's due. Usually that means buying the crappy cheap food, never going to the doctor, and trying not to go shopping too much.
"You should. It might help you figure out what's really the best thing," Tom points out, which is true. It might help me figure out what I'm doing…
"It might just be easier for everyone if we just acted like this never happened…" I sigh. This all would've been so much easier if I just hadn't gone and slept with Derek to begin with…
"I'm gonna call your doctor for you if you don't go," Tom says, "It seems like you really need someone to help you sort through this."
"Alright…"
"You aren't alone, Ivy… even though Derek made it seem that way, you aren't." I don't really say anything to that. I don't have much I could say to that. "You're alone right now, aren't you?"
"Yeah," I say.
"Do you want me to come over for a while?" he offers.
"Yeah," I say again. I really just want somebody to be here with me… it might help right now… I just need some company here…
"Okay, just try to relax…"
"Alright."
Tom Levitt's POV
I get to Ivy's and she sounded like she was upset when we talked on the phone. I hope everything's really okay with her.
"Ivy…" I call, knocking on the door. Nothing.
I knock again, "It's Tom… are you okay?"
"I'm fine," she says, yanking the apartment door open.
"You sure?" I ask, stepping inside.
"Yeah," she sighs, closing the door behind me. Her apartment is pretty messy right now, there's envelopes stacked up on her counter, a few empty glasses in the sink and I can see there's a pile of clothes in the corner of the living room.
"You seem upset…" I calmly tell her.
"My mom wasn't happy when I told her…" she says, slumping down on the couch.
I sigh, but sit next to her, "We talked about that, we knew it was possible."
"I knew she wouldn't be, but Julia thought I should tell her…"
"You did the right thing though. Give it some time before you talk about the adoption," I reassure her, she needs to know she's making some good choices.
"She knows I'm not keeping it," she tells me.
"Alright… can I get you anything to help you feel any better?" I ask, I know she can't have caffeine but I'm sure there's something that will help her relax.
"I'm fine…"
"When was the last time you ate?" I ask her. When she gets busy she seems to slack on eating and taking care of herself. It's not healthy if she does that now.
"Uhm… I haven't had much time to think about eating…" she says, hanging her head.
"Well you're eating. now. you have to eat," I tell her. I can't let her go hungry, it's not good for the baby.
"Mmk…" she sighs.
"What do you want?"
"I don't care."
"Alright… I'll get you something" I say, squeezing her shoulder as I get up.
I go into her kitchen, most of the cabinets are bare and only have a few plates and bowls in them. I open her refrigerator and find that she only has a small carton of milk, some fruit that looks a few days old, and a to go box. I finally find a microwaveable meal in her freezer and decide to heat it up for her, it's gonna have to do for now, she needs something.
"Have a few bites of this…" I say, smiling at her when I bring her the plastic tray with a small piece of chicken and some veggies on it.
She's quiet as she starts picking at the broccoli and I can tell she's still upset.
"Julia said you didn't know how far along you were," I tell her. That concerned me, I would think that was something she'd remember.
"I wasn't really listening when they said…" she quietly says, cutting the chicken into smaller pieces.
I sigh, "Good thing I was, it's a little over fourteen weeks…"
"Oh…" she mumbles, taking a sip of the lemonade I'd brought her.
"See, this is why we need to get you to the doctor" I tell her, she needs someone to really explain all of her options to her before she makes a decision. She's quiet and nibbles on another piece of broccoli.
"I'm calling in the morning. We need to make sure you're still healthy," I say to her
"Alright," she sighs, putting the half eaten meal back on the coffee table.
Doctor's Office…
I'd called her doctor and was able to get her an appointment for the next morning. I told Derek we'd be late to rehearsal and he agreed, we just need to make sure everything's okay with the baby.
We're sitting in the waiting room and her foot hasn't stopped bouncing since we sat down. One of her hands is on the arm of the chair, and the other is resting on her thigh. I gently rest my hand on top of hers and squeeze it. "Just breathe, it's okay," I tell her.
I notice her leg slows down just a little, but she's still bouncing it, and I can tell she's anxious. It's a good thing the doctor comes when they do because I don't think she could have sat there much longer.
We get inside an exam room and Ivy changes into a light pink gown. She climbs up onto the exam table and her leg starts bouncing, again.
There's a knock on the door and Ivy tells them it's okay to come in. She forces a smile at the tall brunette woman.
"Hey Ivy, how're you feeling?" the doctor asks, glancing down at her chart.
"Fine…" Ivy says, shooting a nervous glance at me.
"I'm looking at your chart and it shows records from the hospital that you're pregnant…" the woman says, flipping through some pages and glancing up at Ivy.
"Yeah… I found out last time I was here…" she says, she's siting on her hands now and she's swinging her legs.
"We're just gonna run a couple of tests to make sure everything's okay and do an ultrasound…" the woman says, smiling at Ivy.
"Alright."
I had to hold Ivy's hand while they draw blood, she was terrified of the needle. The doctor went to take the blood to the lab and told Ivy to go ahead and lay down so she could relax. She obeyed her doctor's suggestion and held her hand out to me like she wanted me right there with her.
Her doctor came back in a few minutes later, pushing an ultrasound machine. I stand on the opposite side of Ivy's bed and hold her hand as the woman slowly lifts up Ivy's gown and starts her ultrasound.
"Have you been eating okay?" she asks, glancing at the screen.
"Not that much…" Ivy replies, shooting me another nervous glance.
"You need to eat to keep your energy up," her doctor says.
"I know, I haven't been thinking about eating that much…"
"Is there something else going on?" the brunette woman asks, and gives Ivy a small, but reassuring smile.
"Yeah…" she sighs.
"Is it something you wanna talk about?" her doctor asks, glancing at the screen again.
"Not really…" Ivy quietly says.
"You don't have to tell me. But is there someone you can tell?"
"Yeah," she replies, squeezing my hand.
"Alright. Well, everything looks healthy right now. You need to make sure you eat a little more," the doctor says as she finishes up the ultrasound.
"Mmk…"
"Do you know who the father is?" the woman asks.
"Tom," Ivy says, looking up at me, begging me to agree with her.
This causes the woman to smile, since Ivy introduced me to her doctor. "I'm sure everything will work out fine…"
Ivy's quiet as she sits up and the doctor finishes writing some notes in Ivy's chart.
"I wanna see you again in about a month. Things are looking good right now," the woman says smiling. She quietly leaves the room and I let Ivy change back into the black sweats and baby pink cardigan she was wearing. She just sighs as we walk out of the exam room to make her next appointment.
And that's chapter four! Please review, everyone! I'd love to see what you think since I have like a million hits and only 7 reviews! Just please, tell me how this is?
Btw on tumblr I ended up making a new blog, The Ivy Lynn Movement (donthatetheblonde . tumblr . com) so if anyone wants to look at that… (My friend told me to make a movement so I got bored and did it.)