A/N: Sorry for long wait/short chapter, but I needed to get this done, considering how long I've been distracted from it...

I have been notified by another reader that there are a couple problems with this chapter, but I'm not sure how to fix them at this point. Rest assured, I will do my best to avoid these issues when it comes time to post the next chapter. This will probably involve reading every preexisting chapter thoroughly to regain my understanding of how this story works.

As usual, advice and suggestions welcome, trolls and flames unwelcome, I don't own anyone but Christie and Amanda.

"... and that would be just about every- Wait." I stopped for a moment, going over my mental list of all the Akatsuki members. "Hold on, I think we're missing a couple. Hey, Zetsu!"

The plant-man (for once, he was actually there) looked up from the newspaper, where I think he was reading an article about bass fishing, as I demanded of him, "Where are Kisame and Leader?"

I had miraculously managed to find every single one of the others – the three on the couch (Amanda started freaking out when she saw Itachi's shirt, and vowed to introduce him to the show. I decided that I really should get the poor guy another shirt – one without any ponies on it), in addition to Tobi (although he technically found me). Konan at the table, folding various, ridiculously intricate animals out of whatever paper she could find, across from Zetsu with his fishing article (Amanda for some reason felt the need to poke his flytrap-thing and ask if it was real, eliciting a combination of irritation and confusion), along with Sasori, who spent most of the time we were there whittling away at a block of wood, answering Amanda's questions about the panels on his chest, the joints on his arms, and so on, with as few syllables as possible. He perked up a bit when she asked what he was making, but that was about it. And, finally, there was Kakuzu, who had taken it upon himself to go through the fridge and pantry and make a freakin' list of all the "superfluous" items in my kitchen.

With that over with, there were two people left, and not many places left for them to be. So, I figured that Zetsu, not seeming to be directly at odds with any of the members in particular, would be one of the most likely people to be told where someone was going at any given time. I had kind of expected that I wouldn't like the answer to my question. I was right.

"Well, last I saw, Leader-sama seemed to be heading for your room. And Kisame went outside a few minutes ago."

Just this once, I didn't think to be bothered by the sudden voice change. By the time Zetsu finished his sentence, I was already sprinting toward my room.

I flung the door open, thoughts running through my head a mile a minute. Of course. Of COURSE. I should have known better than to trust those bastards with anything – apparently, a few minutes of freedom is just too damn MUCH for them.

At the sound of the door banging against the wall, Leader didn't even flinch. He just looked up from the book he had been searching through – one that I recognized as one of my old journals – with not even the slightest hint of alarm or remorse in his ringed eyes.

I stormed forward, about to snatch the book from his hands, but he kind of ruined this plan by putting it down before I could grab it. "What do you think you're doing in here?"

He stared down at me coolly, and I felt as if I was almost shrinking under his gaze. "You insist that you have nothing to do with our presence here," he replied. "I was simply verifying that claim."

"That's-" I opened and closed my eyes, staring at him in shock. "You mean you still don't trust me? You still think this is my fault? Who do you think you are, you-"

"To answer your first question, no, not entirely. To answer your second, no, I have found no evidence that you are responsible for this. And I think I am exactly who I am. Now if you'll excuse me..." And with that he left, brushing past me as if I were some stranger who had rudely intruded on his privacy, rather than the other way around. It would be funny how often the Akatsuki did that, except that it totally wasn't.

I just stood there for a moment, eyes closed, trying with all my might not to just turn around and start screaming at him. It kind of worked, at least enough that by the time I gave up and was just about to blow up at him, he was gone.

I was, however, still fuming as I left the room. What is wrong with that guy? I thought, returning to the living room where Leader had already gone, and where Amanda was now very enthusiastically introducing herself. I noticed with some satisfaction that Leader looked vaguely perplexed, and like he was annoyed by the fact that he was perplexed.

"I'm going out to get Sharkboy," I announced, grabbing my keys off the table without pausing as I passed by. I slipped out the door with the distinct feeling that nobody had really noticed I was leaving. Good. Maybe, it they thought I was still there, they wouldn't act so insane. Or not.

I practically sprinted down the steps, skipping the last one and already keeping an eye out for any suspicious, really tall, and/or blue persons. "Hey, Kisame!" I called. "Get your unnaturally-colored butt over here!" At least, I assumed it was unnaturally-colored. I really had no way of knowing and oh God I needed to stop thinking about this. Just for making me go through that train of thought, I decided that, when I found Kisame, I would ensure he regretted this forever. And if anybody had seen him, I would personally murder him.

"Kisame!"

No response.

"Hey, Sharkboy!"

Nothing.

"... Mister Fishy?" No, I don't know where that last one came from. Certainly from one of the deepest, darkest, most disturbed corners of my mind.

Anyway, it worked. Almost as soon as I finished uttering the mortifying name (the question being, for whom was it more mortifying), a familiarly deep, gravelly voice replied, "Okay, okay, I'm right here. Just please do us both a favor and never say those words again." Kisame stepped out from a small alcove a few yards ahead of me, his hands raised in submission.

I glared at him, stomping over to grab his wrist and drag him back to the apartment, if need be. "What are you doing out here? I thought I told you all to stay in the apartment, all the time, unless I specifically took one of you out for something. I swear, sometimes it feels like I'm babysitting a bunch of kids here! Did you know that I caught your ever-so-important Leader going through one of my journals? I mean, what is he, a twelve-year-old boy?"

Kisame was polite enough to wait through this mini-rant before replying, simply, "I'm out here because I needed to get out for a bit."

I raised an eyebrow. "Uh-huh. And what, pray tell, was so important that you just had to leave the apartment right then?"

"Personal space," he replied with a smirk. "I hate to tell you this, but that place is tiny. You couldn't fit five people in there comfortably, let alone twelve."

Unfortunately, he had a point. I bit my tongue to prevent any unneeded comebacks, forcing myself to calm down. Kisame watched impassively, although I'm sure I saw the slightest twitch of an eyebrow, betraying his surprise at what I was doing. I couldn't blame him; after all, I was surprised at what I was doing.

Finally, I managed to say, "Fine. Just... don't go out without permission again. I don't want anyone seeing you."

Kisame's grin returned, and he started back up the stairs to my apartment. "That must have been quite a strain for you, huh, Christie-san?"

I rolled my eyes and followed him. "You have no idea."

Back inside, I called Amanda over. "This is Kisame," I told her. "As you can see, he looks like a shark. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm done."

I walked down the hall back to my own room, checking first to ensure there were no weirdos under my bed or something, then flopped onto my bed, placed a pillow over my face, and wondered when the hell this would be over.