Chapter 2: Booyaka, Booyaka!
As it turns out, crossing this off my list would be tougher than I thought. It seems that no one knew for sure where Bret Hart lived, except for the WWE. Not to mention that Randy wasn't exactly excited about my mission.
"No, Earl, you can't do it, it would be an insult to Americans everywhere," Randy said.
"I've got to Randy! I won $100,000 and got hit by a car. I cost the WWE even more money, and disappointed tons of fans. I've got to fix this," said Earl.
"But how are you going to make it up to him?" asked Randy.
"I'll think of something," Earl said. That was when Catalina walked in.
"Bret Hart? He was great. The best there is, the best there was, the best there ever will be!" said Catalina.
"You watch wrestling!?" Earl exclaimed.
"Wrestling is a major part of my native culture. I even have a friend who is a wrestler," Catalina responded.
"Who? If it's Psicosis I'll pass. He scares me with those pointy horns," said Randy sheepishly.
"Don't worry Randy, it's not Psicosis, it's Rey Mysterio!" said Catalina.
As it turns out, Catalina one dated Rey Mysterio back when he was wrestling in Mexico. They broke up after Rey went to wrestle in America for Paul Heyman, but they still kept in touch. WWE had an event right outside Camden the next day, so we made our way to the arena to meet up with Rey-Rey.
"Hello Rey," said Catalina.
"Catalina, 'sup girl, I haven't seen you since I jobbed to Chavo Guerrero back in '04. What'ya need girl?" asked Mysterio.
"I'd like you to meet my friend Earl, and his brother Randy."
So, I told Rey Mysterio about my list, and how I cost Bret Hart the title. He seemed captivated by my story, and seemed willing to help.
"Hey, Rey- I mean, Mr. Mysterio? Can I have something to remember you by?" asked Randy.
"Sure dog, you can have my mask," said Rey as he started to remove his mask.
"Oh no, don't do that. I don't know if you have a face. It would be real creepy if you didn't have a face like that guy with the weird hat in Fat Albert," said Randy.
"Uh, whatever dude."