How long has it been?
A/N: O.O All of my reviewers are back! :D Note to all of you, this chapter has alot of singing in it so if you dont like just skim or skip it entirely just a warning for some of you! I hope this chapter dosent feel too rushed but I felt the need to update sooner since one of you mentioned that take too long in updating XD Oh and another note, later on in the chapter Lucy is the italic and Monica is the Italic with bold while both of them at the same time is the bold underline just a heads up for that one as well! Enjoy!
"Out on your own,
Cold and alone again…
Can this be what you really wanted, baby?
Blame it on me,
Set your guilt free!
Nothing can hold you back now…
Now that you're gone,
I feel like myself again,
Grieving the things I can't repair,
And willing...
To let you blame it on me!
And set your guilt free…
I don't want to hold you back now, love.
I can't change who I am…
Not this time, I won't lie to keep you near me…
And in this short life, there's no time to waste on giving up.
My love wasn't enough!
And you can blame it on me,
Just set your guilt free, honey…
I don't want to hold you back now, love!"
-Lacrymosa, Evanescence
Monica grimaced and turned the radio off earning herself a questioning glance from Lucifer as he walked around the pool table trying to figure out his next move. Monica ignored the questioning look and in turn turned away to see where Kiri had run off to.
She smiled when she noticed Kiri was playing with Joker as she ran after him trying to catch the biker who in turn jumped over furniture to avoid getting caught by the giggling child. Monica sighed thinking back on the song that had just played for it reminded her of a certain ghost.
My love wasn't enough…
She frowned once more remembering the night when they had parted, she had been too harsh. Kiri was barely starting to get over the fact that she would never see him again. Occasionally Monica would catch the small child listening to opera music or violin pieces while dancing by herself with a sorrowful smile.
Monica hated herself for causing her child so much pain, but there was nothing she could do. The Phantom didn't want her back and that was something that she would never be able to change although she wished she could see him one more time.
She found herself staring at Joker more and more and noticing the similarities between him and the Opera Ghost, perhaps that was why Kiri found his presence more comforting and protective than all of the other bikers.
Monica heard Lucifer curse as the white ball completely missed its target and hit another ball which got the biker in question nowhere. She turned to him with a light grin once he noticed where the ball had stopped.
She leaned over the edge of the pool table and aimed before hitting the ball and pulling back laughing when it hit another and fell into the desired hole. Lucifer cursed once more and threw his pool stick on the table giving up after being beat three times in a row.
"I need some air, I'll be outside if you need me," Monica told him motioning over to Kiri before he nodded. She walked through the large bar that once belonged to her father as several bikers bowed their heads as she passed in respect. She merely continued to walk until she reached the backdoor and opened it stepping into the alleyway that was behind the bar.
The cold air felt good against her skin as she breathed deeply and sighed trying to shake away the memories of the Phantom that emerged with the song that she had just heard.
It had been a year since she had last seen him and things were back to normal with her gang of bikers. Jack was nowhere to be found and despite Lucifer's want to find him Monica just hoped that he stayed away.
She had heard nothing from the Opera Populair or the opera ghost since she had left and she still ached when he resurfaced in her mind. She didn't want to admit it but she still loved him…perhaps even more than before. She worried about him every day, whether he was sleeping enough, eating enough, resting enough.
She shook those thoughts away, why was she thinking of him when he didn't give a damn whether she lived or died?
She felt a tear fall down her cheek as her expression changing from sorrowful to enraged. She was not going to cry over him. She whipped her cheek roughly with her sleeve and clenched her teeth in rage when she saw the damn spot that had been left on her jacket.
She had shed a tear for him far too many times. She had lost track of the lonely nights that she had cried herself to sleep, the times when she broke down during the day unable to bare living without him or his music.
She turned sharply and cleared her thoughts before returning to the bar without thinking about what might have been.
Joker looked up just as she came in before Kiri ran up to him with her arms outstretched. He caught her and spun her around before picking her up and glancing at Monica as she walked over to Lucifer once more with a cold expression on her face.
He sighed while frowning before he felt Kiri's small hand brush over his scar. She was the only person on the face of the earth allowed to touch the scar apart from Monica. Even then he found it hard to believe how she could love the damn scar as much as she did.
"I don't like to see you sad, mami is always sad," Kiri told him before he forced himself to smile if only for her sake.
Before anyone could do anything else Lucy walked in waving the newspaper up in the air as she tried to shake off the snow from outside with her free hand. The smile on her face couldn't have been wider as she walked over to Monica laughing with excitement.
"They're having auditions at the Opera Populair!" she exclaimed as Monica paled and backed up into Lucifer who in turn caught her and held her up as she shook her head when Lucy approached her, "Look at this! We have to go!" she added putting the paper into Monica's shaking hands.
She gave it a cursory look before glancing at Lucy who was ecstatic in front of her as Kiri ran up to her eagerly upon hearing what she had just said.
"Fraulein we have to go!" Kiri exclaimed pulling on Monica's jacket happily as Monica shook her head. She had avoided the Opera Populair for so long in fear of seeing the Phantom…but to return to it once more? She didn't want to see him much less be in his domain.
"It's for the Phantom of the Opera! You have to come I'm sure we could get a part!" Lucy told her in a high pitch voice as Monica resisted the urge to laugh. Out of all of the musicals he could have chosen to perform for opening night he had chosen his own.
"Please fraulein!" Kiri added tugging on her jacket once more. Monica knew Kiri didn't really want to go because of the auditions; she merely wanted to see the Opera Ghost again. She wasn't so sure that he would welcome her with open arms after the words they had exchanged during their last encounter.
"Come on Monica, we have to go now or we'll miss them!" Lucy commented pulling Monica along by grabbing her hand and leading her to the door. Kiri right behind them as Monica pondered on all of the possibilities of Lucy's plan going terribly wrong as she was rushed towards Lucy's car.
As soon as they got in her mind went blank not believing that after a year of not seeing or hearing from him she was going to go back. Perhaps with a little bit of luck she wouldn't see him at all that thought comforted her as they pulled up to the Opera Populair.
Lucy opened the door to her car and rushed outside as she opened Monica's door and pulled her out while Kiri ran towards the entrance her chocolate curls bouncing behind her as she rushed up the stairs and stared bewildered at the two men in front of her who seemed to be closing up behind them.
"Wait please we're here to for the audition!" Lucy told them pulling Monica along as she stared at the large statues outside of the Opera Populair as Lucy argued with the men who told her that she had arrived too late and that the auditions were over.
"Come on, I managed to convince them to let us in," Lucy told Monica pulling her along as they stepping in after the men who pulled out their notebooks and lead them to the main stage.
Monica was amazed with what the Phantom had done; the renovations that had been done while she was gone were surreal.
She was brought back down to earth when the men in front of them asked Lucy a question before she responded and looked at Monica expecting an answer.
"I'm sorry, I was distracted…what did you ask me?" Monica told her as Lucy resisted the urge to face palm before she repeated her question.
"Can you sing without music? They already had the orchestra leave," Lucy told her, "you'll have to sing and entire song for them without it," she told her as Monica nodded. She didn't know why she was there but it brought back so many memories.
She glanced up at the catwalk that was directly above the stage and wondered where the Phantom was before Lucy got on the stage and looked at the two men who nodded at her to proceed.
Monica glanced at them briefly before recognizing one of them, it was Fleur. The man who had stayed with her when the Phantom took them to his circus, she looked around trying to see if the Opera Ghost was anywhere in sight before Lucy's voice brought her back down to reality.
Kiri looked around before catching a glimpse of white from one of the balconies as she sprung to her feet and headed towards the stairs before Monica could notice.
She ascended them as fast as her feet could carry her as she opened the door leading to the balcony seats and rushed over to the one where she thought she had seen the Phantom. Sure enough he stood paralyzed looking down at the sea of red seats where Monica found herself looking at Lucy sing.
"Monsieur Phantom!" Kiri exclaimed as the Opera Ghost turned to look at her before she hugged his leg. He glanced down at the child he thought he would never see again and crouched allowing her to see him better as tears of joy rolled down her face.
"The fraulein has missed you so much! I thought we wouldn't see you again!" she exclaimed as he remained frozen. The child in front of him clinging on to him for dear life as he rose once more and looked down to where Monica was.
How could she miss him when he had hurt her? How could she miss a monster like him…?
"What brought you here?" he asked Kiri as she looked down with him and pointed towards Lucy who was still singing.
"Lucy heard you were looking for people to sing for your play so she brought us with her," Kiri replied as the Phantom nodded. He couldn't find it in himself to look away from Monica as she shifted in her seat and looked around sensing someone staring at her. She dismissed the feeling and continued to watch Lucy sing.
The song that she had chosen was no surprise to any of them as she allowed herself to get lost in his music once more.
"Who knows when love begins?
Who knows what makes it start?
One day it's simply there,
Alive inside in your heart.
It slips into your thoughts,
It infiltrates your soul,
It takes you by surprise,
Then seizes full control.
Try to deny it,
And try to protest,
But love won't let you go,
Once you've been possessed.
Love never dies.
Love never falters.
Once it has spoken,
Love is yours.
Love never fades.
Love never alters.
Hearts may get broken,
Love endures...
Hearts may get broken,
Love endures.
And soon as you submit,
Surrender flesh and bone,
That love takes on a life much bigger than your own.
It uses you at whim and drives you to despair.
And forces you to feel more joy than you can bear.
Love gives you pleasure,
And love brings you pain!
And yet, when both are gone,
Love will still remain.
Once it has spoken,
Love is yours.
Love never dies,
Love never alters,
Hearts may get broken,
Love endures...
Hearts may get broken.
Love never dies!
Love will continue!
Love keeps on beating when you're gone!
Love never dies once it is in you!
Life may be fleeting,
Love lives on...
Life may be fleeting,
Love lives on!"
The Phantom watched as she woman on the stage sang, he had to admit she didn't have a bad vibrato but she overdramatized some parts which he didn't appreciate. He watched with anticipation as his muse rose and walked over to the stage slowly.
She looked around with a slightly frightened expression as he shrunk further back into the shadows afraid of startling her if she saw him.
She fumbled with her hands nervously as the men in front of her nodded ready to listen as she sighed to calm her nerves and tried to think of what to sing. She smiled when she thought of the perfect song and then began.
"The day starts, the day ends,
Time crawls by…
Night steals in, pacing the floor.
The moments creep,
Yet I can't bear to sleep…
Till I hear you sing.
And weeks pass, and months pass,
Seasons fly…
Still you don't walk through the door,
And in a haze,
I count the silent days,
Till I hear you sing once more.
And sometimes at night time,
I dream that you are there…
But wake holding nothing but the empty air.
And years come, and years go,
Time runs dry,
Still I ache down to the core.
My broken soul
Can't be alive and whole,
Till I hear you sing once more…
And music, your music…
It teases at my ear,
I turn and it fades away and you're not here…
Let hopes pass, let dreams pass,
Let them die!
Without you, what are they for?
I'll always feel,
No more than halfway real…
Till I hear you sing…once more!"
She finished with the long note with ease as she regained her breath and sighed pleased with herself as she rejoined Lucy who watched with slight jealousy from the velvet seat she was sitting on.
The Phantom resisted the urge to simply descend the stairs and take her back with him. How he longed to hear her voice, to see her, to hold her. He glanced down at Kiri who stared at Monica and Lucy in amazement. She had never heard them sing with such emotion before.
Fleur glanced up at the box where the Phantom was in a discreet manner as the Phantom shook his head and motioned for him to have them sing once more.
"I hope you do not mind, but we would like to hear a duet with you two," he told the women as they glanced at each other before nodding. They both stood on the stage once more trying to decide what they were going to sing before Lucy got an idea.
"Do you know 'Devil take the Hindmost'?" she asked as Monica nodded, "I'll sing Raoul's part and you can sing the Phantom's," she told her as she stepped away and nodded once more. They both stared at each other before starting.
"Miss Giry, I'm not afraid of him. I've bested him before and if he ever had the courage to meet me face to face, man to man...No, no it can't be…"
Lucy sang looking at Monica knowing she would lose this duet if she didn't sing the Phantom's part right. She knew her voice was better so why was she so worked up about it? She watched as her rival started her part.
"Not afraid of me, you say?"
Monica sang laughing mockingly as Lucy narrowed her eyes at her. It might have looked like she was acting, but deep down she knew she was glaring at Monica only for having such a voice. She responded with an equal tone.
"Stay back or I'll kill you, I promise you!"
Lucy sang finding it ironic that she was singing her thoughts. She would kill Monica if she didn't stay away from the Phantom. The year she had wasted being away from him had given her time to think up another plan and have Jack recover. All she asked for was for Monica to stay away from her man and it would work smoothly.
"Of course.
As you say, you've beaten me before…
But that was a long time ago, Vicomte.
And we were playing a different game…
Look at you, deep in debt…
Stinking drunk – pitiful!
Shall we two make a bet?
Devil take the hindmost…"
Monica spat sensing Lucy was taking it too far with her acting as she let all of the pent up rage she had stored over the past year and allowed it to flow with her voice making her role more believable.
"Look at you, foul as sin!
Hideous – horrible!
Call the stakes, deal me in…
Devil take the hindmost."
Lucy glared at Monica as the two sized each other up on the stage causing Fleur to glance at the Phantom in slight concern. The women seemed to be taking it way too far, but all he got was a blank look from the Phantom indicating that he wanted them to continue.
"Our Christine shall choose tonight!
Let her choose!
Is she yours or mine?
Draw the line!
If she sings you lose tonight…
I won't lose!
You leave from here!
Fine!
Disappear!
Fine! And if she won't, if I win?
All your debts wiped away…
Very well, let's begin...
Devil take the hindmost!"
They started to sing louder sensing that the other was doing far more than acting. They started to circle each other as Fleur glanced once again at the Phantom who merely shook his head and continued to watch the pair sing.
"You think you have the odds
(Our old game,)
You think you're in control
(It's been changed…)
You think you've fixed the dice
(Every throw,)
Well I will gladly roll
(Risking her…)
I'll bet against the house
(All the rules,)
I'll even double down
(Rearranged…
Fate has redesigned those!)"
The Phantom continued to watch as they circled each other their voices going lower and lower as they continued to take it to the next level. He never took his eyes off of his muse who was doing a pretty good job in imitating him down to the last detail in how he sang and his body language. He got chills just by watching her. He couldn't have asked for a better way to get her back after a long and torturous year of having to live without her.
"Fortune's on my side
I won her long ago,
(Cut the deck,)
I won her from you then…
(Let us play…)
I beat you even now,
(Roll your die,)
I'll win her back again
(Once again…)
And when the game is done!
Either way!
Devil take the hindmost!
Now Christine shall choose at last…
Is she yours or mine?
We've a son - our bonds secure
Are you sure?
What?
Are you so sure?
What do you mean?"
They both sang with more emotion as they snarled some parts and shouted the others. Fleur could have sworn he was seeing the doubles of both Raoul and the Phantom as the women on stage continued to impersonate each of their characters with a passion that he hadn't seen in the other people who had tried out for some parts.
"Such a child, strange to see
Different, musical…
Huh?
Is he more you or me?
Which one do you find most?
You lie!"
Monica sang that part with a wicked smile on her face which only enraged Lucy further as she practically thundered out the last part causing Fleur to flinch in his seat as he continued to watch the two duel each other for supremacy. Lucy sneering at Monica as she in turn stared Lucy down. They both took a breath and readied themselves for the part that was to come as they both snarled out the last verses of the song with hate.
"Deal the cards,
(I call your bluff)
Let them fall,
(The game is on…)
Choose your hand,
(And we will see…)
Try your best…
(Who wins out…)
He who wins…
(Once and for all,)
Wins it all,
Devil take the hindmost…"
Both of them stopped circling each other at the same time and dragged the note out with an eerie tone to it as Fleur glanced at the Phantom who was intrigued by their take on the duet that had been written for him and the fop. He had to admit that the other woman knew how to play Raoul, but that was all she had going for her, her vibrato was sometimes forced. He stopped to listen as his muse sang the last line.
"Devil take the hindmost…"
She sang looking at Lucy sensing her friend wasn't much of a friend after all. Fleur broke the tension in between the two as he stood up and clapped along with the other man after receiving an approving nod from the Phantom to give one of them the role of Christine for the musical.
"I am glad to inform you that one of you two will be playing Christine, of course for this role your voice will be tested and your range will be pushed," he told them as he looked at Monica who tried to catch her breath after the duet she had just had with Lucy.
"We would be overjoyed to have you play Christine," he told her as she held back the urge to laugh. This was the Phantom's doing that much she was sure of. She chuckled slightly seeing Lucy's horrified face upon realizing she wasn't going to get the main role.
"I'm sorry but I can't take that role, she deserves it more than me," she told Fleur motioning over to Lucy who immediately looked up when she heard Monica didn't want the role. The Phantom clenched his jaw upon hearing his muse deny her rightful role. He turned from the balcony with a sharp turn motioning for Kiri to follow as he descended and prepared to lecture her on what she had just let slip from her grasp.
"The only other role that would be available would be Carlotta's part," Fleur told her as she thought about it.
"If no one else wants it…I'll be glad to do it," she told him as he grimaced knowing how that role ruined some singers' voices when they didn't do it right. He knew the Phantom was going to kill him when he found out that she hadn't accepted Christine's part.
"Thank you for the part," Lucy told him as she descended from the stage once more and turned to look at Monica, "I'll see you during rehearsals," she told her before leaving followed by the other man who had been with Fleur.
Monica looked at Fleur who merely shook his head in dismay at her as she glanced around and didn't find Kiri. She didn't panic however when she didn't see her child anywhere, she knew she was with the Phantom.
She turned away to go and look for her before she heard a soft thud behind her followed by the ruffling of a cloak before she grimaced knowing the lecture that was coming. She turned to look at the man that she hadn't seen in over a year.
He stood on the stage intimidating and powerful as ever with Kiri by his side hiding behind his large frame peeking over his side looking at Monica with worried eyes as she locked her own pair with the Phantom's.
"We must talk, come," he ordered her as she considered her options. She could leave and forget about him, but she knew she couldn't leave now. How she missed the sound of his voice, his mere presence was a relief from her normal life.
"Fleur will take you around, your mother and I must talk," the Phantom told Kiri as she nodded and hopped down from the stage and ran off with Fleur who followed after her making sure she was kept away from danger as Monica glanced up at the Phantom.
The tension in between both of them could have been cut with a knife due to it being so thick.
"Why did you not take the part I offered you?" he questioned harsh as ever as she found herself submitting to him once more. She found it in herself to shake off the fear that had resurfaced along with her memories and answer back.
"I don't deserve it," she told him blankly as he clenched his jaw.
"Why have you returned?" he questioned her as she merely looked down. He continued to look at her without breaking eye contact as she smiled to herself.
"I would be lying if I said I didn't come back to see you," she told him looking up at him once more, "I missed your music, the lair, and Kiri kept asking for you," she told him as he descended from the stage and circled her with a calculating gaze.
He stopped behind her causing her to shiver and look back at him before his hand wrapped her neck with a gentleness she hadn't been expecting. She jumped as he leaned into her causing her to close her eyes and sigh completely forgetting the hate that she had felt towards him.
"A year…you have been gone for a year," he whispered to her as she looked back at him. He merely pulled her back to him with his hand still on her neck.
"It hasn't been that long," she told him as he laughed. The melodic sound causing her body to shiver once more as he shook his head.
"It has been too long, I have not composed anything since your absence," he told her as she snapped out of her daze and stepped away from him.
"You didn't need me here, remember?" she told him coldly as he stepped forward again longing to hold her again. He had waited too long for her to come back to him; he had nearly forgotten how much he needed her with him.
"I have always needed you," he told her reaching out to hold her again before she stepped back once more.
"This is the third time I've come back Erik, how can I possibly believe that you need me now?" she told him as he resisted the urge to growl at her.
"What would make you believe me?" he asked her as she stepped forward cautiously eyeing the mask on his face as he caught on and nearly shouted at her, "anything but that," he snarled warningly as she stopped walking towards him.
"You have to trust me…I won't leave you," she told him as he glanced down in shame and stepped back when she stepped forward, "I'm not going to abandon you like she did, Erik," she told him as he froze in his spot.
She paused before stepping towards him once more. He didn't make a move to get away as she rose her hand towards his mask. He closed his eyes in regret when her shaking hand touched the porcelain prop. He prayed to whatever god had cursed him to live with his abhorrent face begging for her to not scream when she saw what was underneath.
His breath hitched when he felt her pull the mask away and gasp.