TIMESTAMP: SEASON 3, EPISODE 9 - MALLEUS MALEFICARUM

Claire grinned, tasting victory as she finally was able to get her cell phone between her two fingers. It was awkward, and it required the use of bizarre, weak finger muscles, but she managed to shimmy it out of the crack between the door and the seat.

She slid her newly rescued phone into her back pocket and exited the Impala, breathing in the night air for a moment, knowing that Sam and Dean would probably be arguing over the latest demon development when she entered their motel room.

"I wanted to talk to the oldest, but I guess you'll do. Think you can carry a message, blondie?" speak of the devil.

"Ruby," Claire said. "It's nice to meet you. You know, in a situation where nobody is in immediate danger of dying. And you do realize that you're blonde too, right?"

"I noticed, yeah," Ruby said. "Meat suits take a while to get used to, though. You forget these things."

"Is it true?" Claire blurted. "I mean, that you were human."

Ruby paused. "It was back when the plague was big. All demons were once human, you know – or at least, all the ones I've met were."

"How?" Claire asked. "How does it happen? How do you get from human to demon?" her brain was whirring away at a million miles per hour, and if she was truthful she would admit that one of her first thoughts was: can you get demon powers without becoming a demon?

Because that would be pretty damn cool.

"In hell," Ruby says. "Well – you can imagine. It gets pretty rough down there. You forget yourself."

It wasn't difficult to see where this was going.

"Sooner or later your humanity burns away until you're left like… well, hell makes you forget who you are. That's why demons aren't like you and me," Ruby finished.

"And why are you like me? Why aren't you like a demon?"

"I don't know. I remember what it's like being human," Ruby said. "Don't ask me why. I'm just different."

Claire frowned.

"Dean's going to hell."

"Yes."

"There's no way to stop it. You were lying about that," it wasn't a question.

"Yes."

"He'll become a demon."

"Eventually."

"So what do you want?" Claire asked. "Why did you tell Sam that you could save Dean?"

"I need your help," Ruby said. "Yours and Dean's."

"What could you possibly need our help with?"

"Sam."

"What about him?"

"The way Dean stopped that demon, it was pretty tough," Ruby said. "Sam's almost there, but not quite. And you – you're more objective than both of them put together. We need to get him ready. For when Dean's dead and gone. So he can fight this war on his own."

"I do exist you know," Claire said dryly. "He'll still have me."

"Yeah, for how long? Check out Sam's track record. It's bad overall, of course, but practically every chick he's come in contact with has died violently," Ruby pointed out. "And anyway, Sam's different. He's… special. You can't do all the things he can."

"Like what?" Claire pushed. Ruby just smiled.

"Guess we'll have to find out," she said, and turned to leave.

"Hold on – Ruby," Claire called after her. Ruby stopped and turned, looking a little annoyed.

"What?"

"You've got a vagina of death, too," Claire pointed out. "And seriously, you said you wanted me to carry a message. You expect me to tell Dean that he's going to hell, one hundred percent for sure?"

"Like I said, you're objective," Ruby said. "You'll spill the beans eventually. And yes, I do possess a vagina of death, but I'm also a demon, and considerably less vulnerable than you are."

"True," Claire said. "All the same, watch your back. It'll be nice having a girl pop in every once in a while."

Ruby looked taken aback. "I just told you that I lied about being able to save Dean and you want to be all – buddy buddy?"

Claire shrugged. "I'm objective."