Chapter Ten

Winter break had begun a week ago, and Jude had already gotten a very vocal phone call from her mother about not coming home. She had hung out with Mason until he had finally left for his ski trip. Jude was now sitting in the control room in the radio station bored out of her mind. Stacks of binders surrounded her, but she was tired of going through them.

"How's the organizing?" Jude turned to see Tom in the doorway. It was beginning to become a habit, his sneaking up on her.

"Are you kidding? This job sucks, no wonder no one wants to do it. The pay sucks too." She joked. Since it was a student radio station no one got paid. Except Tom.

"I find it okay actually." Jude smiled as he walked in and handed her a box of takeout.

"For the lady." She took the box with a gracious smile.

"Thank you, kind sir." Jude opened the box and the fresh smell of chicken lo mein flooded her nostrils. "mmm… I love Chinese." Tom laughed and handed her a fork.

"Don't spill anything on the board. It's highly expensive." Jude gave him a mock salute. She leaned back in her chair and sighed.

"Is this seriously what you do all day?" Tom shrugged.

"That's why I enlist the help of students eager to learn." Jude grinned jokingly.

"That's me, eager student." They ate in silence for a couple of minutes.

"So for how long have you been writing?" Tom asked, breaking the silence. Jude looked at him in surprise.

"Since I was six. My dad got me my first guitar when I was 10. Been playing and writing ever since."

"I wish I had the natural skill that you have."

"You don't?" Tom shrugged, pushing his food around in its carton.

"It's not that. It's just… I don't know, you have this… passion, that just can't be taught. I've lost that somewhere along the way." Jude blushed, embarrassed.

"I'm not the great."

"I beg to differ." The room grew quiet as the soft sound of music from the radio filled the room.

"So why didn't you pursue a career in music?" Jude looked at him.

"Becoming a music teacher isn't pursuing a career in music?" She teased him. Tom looked back down at his food.

"I meant, why don't you want to record an album?" Jude sighed and set her food on the table.

"I'm not sure." She looked down at her lap. "Ever since I was little all I could dream about was becoming a rockstar. I don't know when it changed. I guess, after I met Speed my priorities changed a bit."

"Who's Speed?"

"My boyfriend." Tom nodded.

"I still wrote, but I was being more of the supportive girlfriend then a songwriter. I guess Speed always thought that I loved music but wasn't really interested in a career. His band got a lucky break and he got to go on tour." Tom leaned forward, meeting her eyes.

"Isn't a part of you just a little jealous of his success?"

"Well, yeah, but it was really more of a disappointment to myself. I let myself pull away from my music. I can't really blame it on Speed, it's not his fault."

"Jude, you are an amazing writer. Don't let your boyfriend's success stop you from pursuing your dream." Jude looked Tom square in the eye.

"Kind of like how you shouldn't let your family stop you."

"That's different." Tom stated looking away.

"Is it?" She challenged, still staring at him.

"Yes, it is." Tom said facing her again.

"Tom, I'm in your class I here you play on a daily basis. You deserve to be living your dream. Not your parents'."

"Same with you, you should stop hiding." Jude stood up, anger coursing through her.

"I am not hiding!" Tom stood up as well and leveled off with her.

"Oh really? Then why don't you want anyone to hear your amazing voice?"

"Because I just can't!"

"Oh really? Well you shouldn't let your boyfriend stop you!" He said, throwing her words back at her.

"You don't know one thing about me, or my music!"

"Well, same goes for you!"

"Why can't you just quit and live your life the way you want?"

"I will if you will!" Jude scoffed.

"Are we 5?" The anger and passion in their argument escalated, making the room all the more hot. They both stopped yelling and just glared at each other, both breathing heavily.

Tom leaned forward and grabbed Jude by her arms. He bent down and captured her lips in a rough, angry kiss. Jude couldn't form a single thought, so consumed by anger and passion. She let her arms wrap around his neck, as she opened her mouth, trying to deepen the kiss. Tommy wrapped his arms around her back, running his hands up and down, not being able to get close enough to her. Jude curled her fingers into his thick, dark hair. She suddenly pulled back.

"What did I just do?" She whispered, her voice thick and husky. She covered her mouth with her hand and slowly looked up to meet Tom's eyes. He looked away, almost ashamed.

"That shouldn't have happened." He whispered. Jude couldn't answer. She just grabbed her coat and left. The door slammed shut and Tom placed a hand over his eyes.

Jude walked back towards her dorm. She didn't really know what she was feeling at the moment. She was disgusted in herself, but at the same time she wasn't disgusted. She wanted more. She shook her head, trying to get Tom out of it.

Mason was right. She did have feelings for Tom, but Jude wasn't going to let one stupid mistake cost her her relationship.

She entered her room and shrugged out of her coat. She headed straight for the bathroom to splash cold water on her face.

What a day.

She collapsed on her bad and smothered her face in her pillows. Try as she might, she just couldn't forget what had just happened. There was a knock at her door.

"Tom, we really shouldn't talk…" She pulled open the door.

"Oh, uh hey..."

A.N. so who do you think it is at the door?