It was a pretty quiet night in the Bolton household. It was a Sunday; 12 days since Troy's 'accident' as his father referred to it. Troy had slowly started to remember more and more, but his doctor said the 1st two weeks are the slowest and then almost all at once the rest comes back. Troy wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not, he was kind of scared of remembering. Part of him just wanted to start again and never know what happened; he couldn't change it anyway.
Emma had to go back to school tomorrow because she had an assessment in Darbus's class. Now that he remembered his mother, and was good buddies with Gavin, her parents wanted her to return to school at least for her assessments. So tomorrow she would return to school and he and Gavin would hang out. Troy knew he would be ok, but being without her still scared him. He was ok. I mean, depression doesn't just go away, but he was on medication which was slowly beginning to work, and the people around him were making sure he didn't have any extra stress on him.
He was sitting on the couch watching Summerland with Emma. Troy only really felt comfortable in his own room, he didn't know why. But his parents didn't want him to be bored. So in his room he now had the couch and tv/dvd/ps2 set up from the living room, a keyboard that was Emma's, a mini fridge and a number of other entertainment methods from the rest of the house. He watched Emma as she silently absorbed herself in what was going on on-screen. He smiled, thinking of all the time she had spent with him, just so he would feel ok. Ok, so that wasn't the only thing he was thinking. One of the side-effects of depression is a loss of sex drive, so one of the side-effects of being on medication which was lessening his immediate state, coupled with a loss of memory of whatever it was that was making him depressed, was this his hormones were in full swing, and he was going crazy.
The episode of Summerland they were watching came to an end, and Emma looked up at Troy, noticing he was staring at her. She smiled at him and coming back from his thoughts he blushed. A strange look came over Emma's face. Troy blushed? That made no sense to her, I mean; they were so comfortable around each other.
"Troy, are you ok?" Emma asked. Troy just tried to shake himself out of it and gave her a smile. She didn't really buy it but decided to let it go. She leaned over and kissed him lightly on the lips. It was a long slow kiss that was driving Troy wild. After another few seconds it was too much for Troy and he let out a breathy sigh before pulling Emma into a long, hard, passionate kiss. He was hungry for her; he hadn't felt such passion in months and it felt great. Emma responded for a bit and then pulled away smiling.
"Wow… Where did that come from?" She asked smiling. She expected Troy to smile too, but instead he blushed and pulled away, rubbing the back of his neck.
"Hey Troy I was only kidding…" He still didn't look at her. "Troy, what's up? You know you can tell me…" Troy let out a long breath and then walked over to the window and looked out, unsure if he should say anything, and if he were to, what the hell would he say? 'Hey yeah I'm feeling incredibly horny, how bout we hit the sack?' No he couldn't say that, he might give Emma the wrong impression…
Emma got it. She was surprised at how Troy had kissed her, but that's not to say she didn't enjoy it. So he was a bit frisky, I mean, that was really a good thing; it means he must be feeling a bit better. But she kinda got his embarrassment; they hadn't exactly been like that together before. Emma knew she had to do something to let him know it was ok, only she hadn't ever come on to a guy before. But she couldn't stand the tension of the moment, so she had to bite the bullet. She walked over to where Troy was standing and slotted herself between him and the window. She hooked to of her fingers into the waistband of Troy's trackies and pulled him closer to her. She looked at him and waited for him to look her in the eyes. When he did, a mischievous grin came over her face.
"It's ok Troy, I get it… and I liked it…" She said slyly with a grin growing over her face. Troy looked at her, completely shocked, and then a huge grin came over his face. He put his arms around her waist and pulled her right up against him, kissing her fiercely. She immediately responded by wrapping her arms around his neck. He lifted her up and sat her on the windowsill, standing in between her legs. As they continued kissing Troy was getting more and more turned on. God how he had missed this feeling. Emma let out a soft moan as she let out a quick sigh into him. If Troy was on edge before, that sent him soaring into the world of no return. He lifted Emma up of the windowsill and laid her on his bed, slowly lying down on top of her. Troy didn't know how much more he could take before he ripped all her clothes off, but he still wasn't sure exactly how far she wanted to go, so he painfully held back for the moment. Emma could feel that he was hard as he pushed himself against her, and she smiled as she kissed him, quite quite thankful that he was feeling better. She began tugging at Troy's shirt, hoping he would get the hint and kindly remove it for her. Not surprisingly he was all too keen to jump at the chance and after removing it, kindly removed Emma's for her as well. He didn't want her to feel left out after all. Barely 5 minutes after this, Emma and Troy were rolling around naked in his bed, quite enjoying entertaining their feelings with their hands. Troy was going wild, he couldn't remember if he had had this kind of fun before, but it can't have been anywhere near as good as this or he would have never EVER forgotten it. Just as he was thinking this Emma pulled away slightly.
"Troy, do you have anything?" She asked, panting. Troy was hoping for this, but he certainly didn't expect it.
"Em, are you sure? I mean, really sure?" He asked. Sure he was up for it, but he was still a gentleman at heart.
"I'm sure Troy, I want this." He gave her a loving smile and kissed her briefly before leaning over to his bedside table, hoping to God that he did actually have some sort of protection. Bingo. He found one and quickly put it on. He turned back to Emma and she began to speak.
"Um, Troy, have you ever done this before?" She asked, kind of nervously.
"Well, I don't know. I mean, I don't really remember." He said, avoiding her eyes, trying to hide the fact that it bothered him.
"Have you?" He asked, not entirely sure if he wanted her to say yes or no.
"Um, well, once. But it uhh… I don't want you to make a big deal of it… but it wasn't… exactly... by choice. But it's ok Troy, really. I mean; it was a long time ago." She said quickly. Troy paused and looked at her.
"Em, it is a big deal. Someone hurt you. Are you 100 sure you still want this?"
"Yes Troy I promise I'm sure. Right here with you; everything is perfect. And I want to share this with you." They smiled at each other and began to kiss again, but not like it was before, it was more loving and sweet. Two words that fairly adequately describe how they both felt about the events that followed. (Im sorry, im already pissing myself laughing from trying to right the last bit, I fully cant take myself seriously trying to write it hahaha. Sorry to spoil the moment but u'll survive.)
The next morning Troy woke up fairly slowly. He smiled to himself, but that smile soon faded as when he reached over to cuddle Emma she wasn't there. Upset at having missed his good morning kiss, he got up and put on his trackies before going downstairs for some brekkie. When he got downstairs he saw Gavin in the kitchen making himself some coffee. Troy made a sleepy noise hello and sat down to eat his Cheerios (I love them, im from aus and they have just brought them out here in the last month, god they're good!) He poured the last bits of the packet into his bowl then looked in the bottom of the packet and shaking it upside down.
"Hey bitch, d'you steal my toy?" He asked Gavin in a grumpy-five-year-old kind of way.
"Who me?" Gavin replied asking. Troy's eyes just narrowed. Gavin threw his hands up in innocence.
"It was Em I swear!" Troy made a grumpy 'hmmph' noise and sat down to eat his toyless cereal.
"Hey, wana go down to the park today and play a bit of soccer? The season starts soon and I'm out of practice." Gavin asked plonking himself down on the couch. Troy agreed to this and they spent a few hours running around in the park until they both had worked up a huge sweat. After they came home, Troy immediately fell asleep on top of the covers on his bed. Gavin settled down to watch the TV.
A few hours later, Troy finally awoke. He stumbled into the shower to wake himself up and clean off the mud. When he came downstairs, he saw Gavin asleep on the couch. Troy went up to his room and decided to have a hunt for anything he hadn't found yet. As he was going through his cupboard he spotted a shoebox right up on the top shelf. Troy reached up for it and then opened it. It had all sorts of things in it. He pulled out a tattered looking book and opened it to the first page. It seemed like some kind of journal. The date on the top left hand corner was from just over 6 months ago. It read: "People see me as an object, not as a person, and they have projected a set of expectations onto me. People who don't have it think beauty is a blessing, but actually it sets me apart. Basketball has ruined me, but to all else, it seems to define me. How can you become free from yourself? How do you escape your own skin?" Troy didn't want to read anymore, but at the same time he did. But even just having opened it, he had a bad feeling about it, and decided he didn't want to go through it alone, so he decided to take it as he went for a walk and have a look around to see if he could find Emma.
Troy walked around for about an hour. Some of the places he walked around seemed a little familiar, however some of them were completely foreign to him. He continued walking; he wasn't sure where he was going, but he seemed to know the route. He came upon a large building. It looked kinda like a school. "East High." It didn't sound familiar or look familiar, but he thought maybe Emma was there.
When he entered the hallway, he saw a lot of people headed towards a large room. Maybe it was lunch? He followed them down the hall but stopped when he came to a large poster of what looked like him… Huh? What the Hell? He tried to shake it off as he walked through a swinging set of double doors into a huge room with tables and chairs.
Gabi suddenly became really quiet at the lunch table. The gang looked at her and then followed her gaze to see Troy standing in the doorway of the cafeteria, seeming to look for something. As the table sat there, silently staring at him, his gaze swept straight over them to the table next to them where Emma sat, alone. (They are on the elevated bit up the stairs.) A small smile crept over his face as he walked over to the other side of the cafeteria, towards them, and climbed the stairs two at a time. He walked straight past them, and crept up behind Emma, placing his hands over her eyes. (A/N THE GANG CAN HEAR EVERYTHING)
"Guess who?" He asked, knowing she would immediately know his voice.
"Troy? What are you doing here? Where's Gav?" She asked happily.
"He fell asleep watching 'Ren and Stimpy' and I needed some company, so I decided to go for a walk and see if I could find you."
"Oh really, well I'm glad you're here." She gave him a quick kiss. "How long did it take you to find the school?" Troy laughed.
"About an hour and a half." He said sheepishly. Emma laughed, and then noticed the box in his hands.
"Hey, what's that?"
"Oh, I found it at the top of my closet. I opened it, n it has like a diary of the last 6 months and some other stuff. But after reading the first page I was too scared to read anymore, at least by myself."
"Can I open it?"
"Sure that's why I brought it." They began to go through the box together, which was packed full of random stuff.
"Wow, you did a lot of drugs Troy."
"Yeah, that's so fucked up… Hey look I have a fakie hahaha, it says I'm 22!"
"Hey there's a book of phone numbers, I'll read out the names to you, tell me if you remember any of them… Amelia?"
"Nope."
"Ben Connelly?"
"Nup."
"Chasitiy? Sounds like a hooker…"
"Hmm, I think she was…." This continued for a while…
"Jake Gallagher?"
"Wait. I think I remember him. Yeah I do, he was always nice to me. I mean, in a fucked up way. He always took me out with him and his friends, gave me drugs for free, introduced me to all kinds of people, and hooked me up with hookers and what not. That's so weird I remember him. I should give him a call sometime, he's probably wondering what's been happening." Troy reached for some other sheets of loose paper in the box.
"Breaking Free?"
"What's that?" Em asked.
"I dunno, a song of some kind. But it's a duet. I don't remember it though. Can I even sing?"
"I guess so if you have music."
"Oh, It's not mine anyway, it's got Kelsie's name on it." He stood up and walked the few steps over to the gang's table (they were all listening intently to Troy and Emma).
"Hey Kels, um I think this is yours." He handed it to her. She stared at him.
"Troy?" She asked.
"Yeah" he answered; confused that she wasn't sure it was him. She jumped up and gave him a big hug.
"Um, Kels… Air!" He said, trying to get her to loosen her grasp on him.
"Oh, sorry" She said a little sheepishly.
"It was good to see ya Kels." He said smiling, before returning to Emma.
Soon the box was empty of everything except the diary. They both just looked at it.
"Open it Troy." Emma encouraged. He just contined to stare and then shook his head.
"No, you dot it. Please?" He looked at her, his eyes begging.
"Ok, but before I do, I want you to tell me what you read; what it said that makes you so scared to open it again." Troy took a deep breath, and the gang stepped up their listening.
"The date on the page was about 6 months ago… It said something about basketball… How I hated it and it ruined me but how everyone else only saw me as a basketball player… and how I was trapped… I… I sounded so unhappy… I don't get how I could hate something so much and how no one would listen… or just let me be myself…" He trailed off. Emma put her hands on his cheeks and cupped his face. She waited till he looked her in the eyes, and then gave him a slow, soft kiss. She pulled back and looked at him.
"I'm glad you brought this to me Troy. It's gonna hurt, but I'm going to reaed it and then tell you about what I read. And I need you to trust me that what I will tell you is not because I want to hurt you, but because I think you need to know." Troy nodded. She continued.
"I'm so sorry you felt trapped. I wish I could take all you pain and put it on me. I do. But you are your own person now. You have been given a second chance to make things right: To just be yourself, and to be happy. And you don't have to do anything you don't want to do." The moment was interrupted by an outburst by Chad.
"But you have to play basketball again. The team needs you captain, you can't just give up?" Troy gave him a dirty look.
"And what gave you permission to eavesdrop and tell me what to do, whoever the hell you are?" Troy answered back.
"Troy, it's me, Chad. I'm your best friend."
"Well, if you were such a good friend then tell me: What is it that you did to me that made my brain decide that I would be better off if I just blocked you out?" This question stumped Chad.
"Well, then… Chad was it? If you don't mind please leave me alone and stop eavesdropping." Chad sat back down, a bewildered look on his face. Troy was right; he had been a terrible friend. And more than that, he knew know that he was part of the reason Troy had spiralled down. It wasn't the break up with Gabi, or just his dad; it was everyone, him, Zeke, Jason: Everyone who failed to see Troy as more than just their captain, and who failed to support him enough so that he would feel ok to come to them when he needed understanding. The gang all sat there in silence; all thinking these thoughts. Then the bell went and they heard Emma speak.
"I have my assessment now." Troy nodded.
"Can I watch?"
"Um, really?"
"I love to hear you sing…"
"Ok, sure. Come on, I'll lead the way." They got to homeroom before Darbus was there, but unfortunately, the gang was there. Troy and Emma walked passed them to her desk near the window. He leant against it, sitting on its edge, and pulled Emma towards him so she was leaning against him. They were just standing there in each other's arms for a few minutes, when Troy spoke softly into Emma's ear.
"I love you Emie." She smiled and whispered back to him.
"I love you Troy." A Pause.
"Hey Em?"
"Mmm"
"Do you think maybe later you could teach me a song? I mean, maybe I can sing, maybe that's the something else that I wanted to do instead of basketball?" Emma paused and looked up at him smiling.
"Anything for you baby." Troy gave her a smile and a quick peck. Gabi could see them whispering to each other as they hugged. She was so jealous about the way Troy would look at Emma, just like how he used to look at her. Only, he couldn't remember that. Everything they had was gone to him. Her heart sank. This was how it was going to be.
Darbus then entered to room loudly and with much presence. She was looked around at her students and then noticed Troy.
"Well, Mr. Bolton! What a surprise, welcome back to our class of creative energy." Troy gave her a weird look so Emma spoke for him.
"Oh, he is just here to watch my assessment."
"Oh, well. Welcome back anyway Troy, and I hope you do return soon, I would hate for you too miss the auditions for the next musicale, it would be a true loss for our drama club! Shall we Miss Wiltshire?"
Emma walked up to the mini stage up the front and plugged in the keyboard and set up a mic. She set the keyboard to play a certain beat and began her assesement.
"My skin is like a map
of where my heart has been
And i cant hide the marks
its not a negative thing
So i let my guard down
drop my defences down by my clothes
i'm learning to fall
with no safety net to cushion the blow
I bruise easily
so be gentle when u handle me
Theres a mark you leave
Like a love heart carved on a tree
I bruise easily
Cant stratch the surface
without moving me underneath
I bruise easily
I bruise easily
I found you fingerprints
on a glass of wine
Do you know you're leaving them
all over this heart of mine too
But if i never take this leap of faith
I'll never know
So im learning to fall
with no safety net to cushion the blow
I bruise easily
so be gentle when u handle me
Theres a mark you leave
Like a love heart carved on a tree
I bruise easily
Cant stratch the surface
without moving me underneath
I bruise easily
I bruise easily
Anyone wo can touch you
can hurt you or heal u
Anyone who can reach you
can love you or leave u
So be gentle..."
"BRAVA!" Darbus shouted. Emma smiled, secretly thinking she was going to get a good mark for that. It felt good to get a good mark for one of her own songs that she had written. At that moment a teacher came to the door and called Mrs. Darbus out for something.
"Em baby that was AWESOME!" Everyone heard from the window. They all turned to see Gavin climb through, ungracefully. Emma laughed and went over to hug her brother. He then went over to Troy and they knocked fists as Gavin said:
"Hey man, what was up with that? You left me alone in your house with no food!"
"Hey, there was cheerios!"
"You ate them all this morning!"
"Oh whoops!" Troy said laughing.
"Well, anywho, I'm starving, you up for all you can eat pizza hut?"
"Yeah sweet." They both looked at Emma.
"Well, don't look at me, I have class." Gav spoke.
"Come on little sis, technically mum said you only had to come in to sit your assessment, which you just did, awesomely I might add. So now, speaking technically of course, your free as a bird." Gav seemed quite happy at his reasoning. Troy joined in.
"Yeah, and I know you love their all you can eat desert bar…"
At that moment Darbus entered the room, and looking at Troy and Gavin, quickly motioned them to leave, now! They both gave Emma a strange look then walked out the door. Emma was intrigued by their mischievous looks but decided to let it go.
The gang watched Gav and Troy laugh to eachother as they left the room. The guys all looked at each other, all thinking the same thing; Troy should be hanging out with them not that Gavin guy. AS much as they wouldn't admit it; they were jealous.
A very loud crashing noise echoed into the classroom and Darbus hastened out to yell at the perpetrator. The second she left, Troy ran into the room and over to Emma.
"Troy, I though you left. What are you doing here?"
"Kidnapping you." He answered happily.
"Troy! And what did you just break to cause that distraction?"
"Relax Em, it was just some fireworks in a locker, no biggy!" He opened the window as Gavin appeared on the other side.
"Oh no guys, I'm staying right here."
"Oh no your not!" Troy said, lifting her off the ground and passing her out the window to Gav. Then with a huge smile on his face he began to climb out. When he was halfway out the turned back to the class.
"Oh Ryan, look I know I still owe you and Tay that money from the thing, with the guy, in the place. Don't think I've forgotten I'll bring it next time I see you." With that he jumped out the window, and the gang watched as the 3 of them ran across the oval, laughing their heads off at what they had just done, and climbing into Gav's car. The gang were in shock, most of all Ryan and Taylor. Troy had remembered them, and remembered something as trivial as the money he owed them. Gabi just sat there silently. Troy still didn't remember her, nor did he ever bust her out of class. Granted she was a nerd and would have hated him for it, but she hated that he was so happy with Em because she was so much more fun. She wondered how long it would be before he remembered her, not realising it would be that night.
DUN DUN DUN!
NEXT CHAP TROY N GABI
AND OTHER STUFF…
11 pages, my record!
I hope the length makes up for how long it took to post! Xox