Chapter Five

D.P.O.V

"What is wrong with you today?" Blaise asked me during our second lesson of the day – Potions.

"Nothing." I said curtly as I furiously cut up some Mandrake root.

"Mate, I may be pretty hot but I'm not dumb. You weren't at breakfast this morning, you stormed into this room, looking like you were going to kill everyone in this room, and we've been in this class for twenty minutes and you haven't once made a joke about Weasley's rags that barely pass as robes or the fact that Longbottom has had to throw his pathetic excuse of a potion away twice."

"Really? I haven't notice." I replied glancing at Longbottom quickly before returning my gaze to the table. I didn't want to look over at Weasley. I didn't think I could stand seeing them happily working together right now. Not after this morning.

"That's what I mean. The Draco Malfoy I know would notice and would have made a joke out of them – not stand around in silence. So why don't you tell me what's up?"

"I really don't want to talk about it." I snapped tossing the now cut Mandrake root into my cauldron.

"Ok." Blaise said and I was pleased that he had dropped the subject. We carried on cutting and slicing our ingredients for a few minutes before Blaise interrupted the silence.

"It's that girl that you like so much isn't it?" my stomach instantly plummeted as if a huge weight had been dropped into it. "I'll take your continued silence as a yes." Blaise continued.

"Yeah it is to do with her." I admitted, pain surging in my chest as I remembered Hermione's words of rejection.

"What's happened? Maybe I can help?" Blaise offered.

"You can't help. She made her choice already and I'm not it." I said gloomily.

"Woah. When did this happen?"

"Last night after I left you, I ran into her on the way to my dorm," I added to hide the identity of my crush.

"So she just told you right then and there that you didn't stand a chance?" Blaise inquired.

"No, it didn't happen just like that."

"Well then, tell me what did happen. From the beginning," Blaise persisted.

"Look mat, I really don't want to talk about it."

"That bad then?"

"Well seeing as I saw her locking lips with her boyfriend this morning, after she said that she hates me and wants nothing to do with me, I'd say it was pretty bad yeah."

"Mate, I'm sorry."

"I can't believe it; I really thought she liked me. Especially after we kissed bu-"

"What the hell? You kissed her! When? How?"

"I told you I saw her last night and I tried the whole seducing thing you said and we ended up kissing."

"What was it like?"

"Hands down the best kiss of my life," I said as a grin I couldn't stop spread across my face.

"So she kissed you back?" Blaise asked, a grin that matched mine appeared on his face.

"Yeah, for a few minutes but then she pulled away, slapped me and told me she loved her boyfriend and hates me." I said beginning to feel down again.

"Mate, I think you're missing the point here."

"Really? Because I think the slap said it all to be honest."

Blaise chuckled slightly at my comment.

"You're missing the point entirely, Drac. She kissed you back meaning she has feelings for you! She only said she hates you because you've made her revaluate her feelings." I must have looked as confused as I felt because Blaise continued his explanation.

"Here it is: she has a boyfriend who (to some extent at least) she cares for. Then you come along and you both share this kiss that (by the sounds of it) was pretty amazing, which makes her confused as to what to do with these new found feelings for you. Plus she feels guilty for kissing you when she has a boyfriend, and I expect that she's slightly wary of you because (no offence dude) you have a reputation of being a bit of a man – whore."

"Yeah, that's nice to know and all but what are you getting at?" I asked, not quite understanding the point of his speech.

"My point is that she wouldn't have kissed you if she hadn't wanted t."

"Yeah…so?" people kiss people kiss people who they don't like all the time. As I recall you often share kisses with people you don't like," I said cheekily.

"True, but I doubt the girl we're talking about is like the girls I choose to have a quick make-out or shagging session with." Blaise retaliated.

"No, she's nothing like the girls you go for. She actually has some self-respect."

"Well then, it seems to me that she does like you, if she really is the girl that you think she is, in that she doesn't go around kissing random people that she doesn't care for, then she must like you"

Even though I knew it was foolish, I couldn't stop the hope that suddenly flared up inside me at his words. "Do you really think so?" I couldn't help the words from coming out, regardless of how pathetic I sounded.

"I really do. Mate, you should know this stuff by now your Draco Malfoy!"

"Yeah, I do, it's just that I'm travelling unchartered waters with her. Everything's different with her. Which makes the normal rules not apply to her and anyway you weren't there the things she said…she had to have meant them."

"Believe what you want, just giving my opinion on the subject."

As we both got back to our potions (adding and preparing the ingredients) in silence, I thought about the conversation we just had. Blaise did have a point – Hermione had kissed me back and not just once but twice. So she had to be at least attracted to me otherwise she wouldn't have done it. However it was perfectly possible for her to have feelings for me whilst having bigger feelings for Weasley.

This new conclusion didn't fill me with hope either. Instead it hurt and angered me, just like her words this morning – I had come second best to Weasley! I cast my gaze over to where Hermione and Weasley were working side by side.

Her eyes were cast down and her head slightly bent as she concentrated on cutting what was on her desk. Weasley stood next to her gently running his hand down the length of his arm; I'd have gladly given anything to be able to do that. Hermione turned her head and gave Weasley a loving smile (if only that smile was meant for me) before turning away again.

Before she could return to her work, however, she looked up and caught my eye and for a second I felt completely lost in her gaze, the whole world had disappeared and it was just us. But then I remembered that it wasn't and she wanted Weasley not me.

I tore my gaze away from hers and walked to the storeroom in the back of the class. I had to have a few minutes alone. I couldn't even bare to look at her, knowing she was with him…

"Draco?" Her voice made my blood run cold. I didn't want to turn around, but I was unable to resist glancing at her beautiful face. I turned slowly to face her. Even the sight of her now caused an uncomfortable pain in my chest.

"Come to tell me you hate me Granger? Because you did that already and believe me once is enough for me." I said quietly.

"No I wanted to see if you were ok," she said, somewhat timidly.

"Like you care," I snapped instantly regretting my tone.

"Draco I'm sorry. I think we should talk about what happened."

"I think you said quite enough this morning, don't you?"

"Draco, I-"

"Not now Hermione. Please, I can't stand it." My voice sounded broken as I cut her off.

"But-" I couldn't bear to hear her rejection again. Hearing more reasons as to why she didn't like me would kill me right now. Instead I strode straight past her and back to my desk where I stood for the rest of the lesson, keeping my eyes trained to the desk and not towards her…

I was exhausted as I walked into the Great Hall for dinner that evening. It was truly tiring having to avoid Hermione all day, I'd been in and out of storage closets so many times I'd lost count and I felt ready to pass out as I sat down at the Slytherin table.

"Hey, Draco…" a sickly sweet sounding voice said, managing to push its way through the fog of tiredness. Without turning, I knew who the voice belonged to: Pansy. She carried on talking to me but I wasn't listening. Hermione and Weaselbee had just walked into the hall.

I suddenly lost my appetite and felt slightly sick as I watched Weasley fawn over her. I gritted my teeth as the urge to haul Weasley out of his chair, and claim my rightful seat next to the prettiest girl in the world, became almost unbearable.

"Draco are you listening to me?" that annoying voice interrupted my thoughts again and I almost flinched as she placed her hand on my arm in an attempt to get my attention. Then it hit me. If there was a chance she liked me she'd get just as jealous as I did when she saw me with someone else.

But then it would hurt her and did I want to do that just to get what I want? I looked over at her again trying to see the answer. But instead I was greeted by the sight of Weasley feeding her food. Anger flowed through me and with its arrival the answer.

"Of course I'm listening babe. You know I love hearing what you have to say. But I've kind of lost my appetite and was wondering if you'd like to continue this conversation in private?" I asked Pansy giving her a cheeky wink when I'd finished.

I knew the answer before she said it. Pansy always gave the same answer: "Yes. Ok." She answered with a huge grin on her face. I got up from the table and made my way back to my common room, knowing Pansy was following quickly behind me.

On our way back to my dormitory we talked about the trivial things that had happened to her over the holiday. I was relieved when we finally reached the heads dormitories, how could I have forgotten how annoying and boring Pansy was? But then as I recieted the password to let us in, I reminded myself of why I was doing this.

Being the gentleman that I am I let Pansy go into the common room before me. When we were both seated on the sofa closet to the fire I began my act.

"I've missed you, Pansy," I said taking her hands in mine, "You're all I've thought of all summer." I watched as my meaningless words caused Pansy to blush and smile and knew that it was time to make my move.

Slowly I leaned towards her and pressed my lips to hers. Immediately she responded to my kiss, deepening it as I felt her tongue brush against mine. I almost pulled away in disgust. I didn't want ot be making out with Pansy. I wanted Hermione but until she wised up to how she really felt, I had to do what I could to make her mine - even if that meant tonguing Pansy to make her realise that, then it was a sacrifice I was willing to make.

With this outcome in mind, I moved my hand and wove it through Pansy's hair as I tugged her closer to me and found myself imagining she was Hermione. That Hermione's hair was wrapped round my hand and it was her lips that were moving against mine. With the image of Hermione in my head I pushed Pansy back gently until she lay on the sofa with me on top of her. I groaned as I imagined Hermione pressed this closely against me…

"What the fuck is going on?" The voice pulled me away from my imagined fantasy with a start. I pulled away from Pansy and sat up, looking over my shoulder to see Hermione standing by the portrait hole, her face red with anger.

"What does it look like we're doing Granger?" Pansy's voice answered I glanced back at her to see that she'd sat up on her elbows and had a grin on her face as she looked at Hermione.

"Pupils aren't allowed in the Head's dormitories. So I suggest you leave now," Hermione snapped ignoring Pansy's question and pointing to the portrait hole.

"Draco! Are you going to let HER speak to ME like that?" Pansy shrieked outrage clear on her face.

It seemed my plan had worked. But I hadn't seen her, this angry before. "Pansy leave. I need to teach our head girl a lesson in manners." Pansy looked pleased about my response as she got up to leave. Hermione watched as she left, her arms crossed over her chest and her eyes narrowed.

Once the portrait had closed after Pansy, I rose from the sofa as I stood in front of her. "Why are you so mad?" I asked sharply. "Because you are abusing the privileges given to both of us as Heads of this school. We have a duty to set an example to the rest of the students!"

I took a step towards her angry at her made up excuse. "That's bull! That's not why you're angry! You're angry because you saw me kissing Pansy! You're angry because I wasn't kissing you!" I shouted my voice rising with my temper. I kept eye contact with her, staring her straight in the eyes so I could easier read her.

"No it's not!" She replied looking away as she said it.

"Yes it is, and you know it! God, I don't get you Hermione. First you kiss me. Twice! Then you tell me you hate me after I've admitted that I like you and now you're furious at the fact you've caught me kissing another girl! What the hell do you want?" I shouted both extremely angry and confused.

"You." Hermione said in a small voice.

I carried on my tirade oblivious to what she had said: "You are the most infuriating women I have ever met- wait…what?" I asked when her words had sunk in.

"I want you." she repeated all anger gone from her face as she stared at me, "but I'm scared. I don't know what this will mean. I don't want to hurt Ron-" I cut her off, by closing the remainder of the space between us and kissing her deeply. And as her hands tangled in my hair, as she pulled me closer, I knew nothing mattered except her…