*nervous laugh* heh, heh. Hey everybody! Guess What? My computers infected. Again. Ya' know, it's real scary when one moment you are watching a movie, and the next there is a big black box on my computer saying:" You're infected". So I'm typing like crazy on my roommate's laptop. So since I am currently rewriting my chapter, here is a side story. FYI, this takes place BEFORE Bella met the Cullen's. She's about 14 in this one.

Disclaimer: Don't own

What. The. Heck.

Okay Bella, calm down. You're a Swan, and Swans always are calm, graceful, and elegant.

I am sooo not a model Swan.

Okay, okay. There must be a reason why I'm in a puffy blue dress with an apron, sitting on a riverbank. Last time I checked I was sitting in the windowsill at home. Huh, must've dozed off.

I took this time to take in my surroundings. I was currently dressed in the blue ensemble previously mentioned with stockings and flats, and my hair was tied with a black ribbon. I was sitting under a tree, and it was then I noticed I wasn't alone.

"Alice. Alice!"

That voice was familiar. And sure enough, right next to me was Jocelyn, a book in her hand. She looked at me sternly, though her eyes were filled with mirth. She was dressed strangely too.

Then I realized what she called me.

"Alice? Who the heck is Alice, Jocelyn?"

She raised her arched eyebrows, and the mirth left, only to be replaced by confusion.

"Why, that's you, Alice. And who ever is Jocelyn?"

I only stared at her with my mouth slightly open. As she gauged my reaction, she placed her small hand on my forehead, frowning slightly.

"Are you okay, Alice" She asked me.

I was about to say the same, when the weirdest thing happened. As I looked over her shoulder, I saw a really handsome guy with bronze hair a few yards away. That doesn't sound really strange, but the weird part was that he was a rabbit. And no, I'm not seeing things. He had everything from the floppy ears, to the white paws, and even the fluffy tail.

"I'm late, I'm late" he said hopping pass me.

I was overcome with a strange curiousness. Surprising Jocelyn- or whoever she is, I shot straight up and bolted towards the rabbit, leaving the stunned girl behind me. I wasn't sure why, but for some reason I just I just had to talk with this rabbit-man.

Dang, that thing is quick. I was running for a good 5 minutes; always out of reach from the rabbit by a hair- no pun intended- before he sped up and away again. I though I would finally catch him when he suddenly stopped, but then he jumped down a big hole I didn't notice was there before.

Crap! My legs weren't listening to me, and I ran straight for the hole, until I was running on air for about half a second. Then I was falling.

In Slow Motion. Strange, huh?

I saw dark before all sorts of things started popping up.

What the heck? Was that Mickey Mouse?

When I finally landed, my butt cushioned the fall. Ouch. I was goanna feel that in the mornin'. I sat up; dusting my self off, when I looked around the strange room I was in.

First of all the room was filled with a bunch of doors. I went over to one and attempted to pull it open. No such luck. It was locked.

It was then I noticed a little glass table- I swear it wasn't there before- with a gold key. I walked over to it and lifted it up, rolling it in my hands for a while.

I thought I heard a small poof and did a complete 180 before I saw a small, tiny curtain on the bottom of the wall. Okay, I know that wasn't there before. As usual, curiosity got the best of me, and I found myself being drawn to it. I kneeled down and pulled back the curtain to reveal a miniature door. A certain door that seemed just the right size for a certain key.

I got down on all fours, and stuck the key in the lock twisting it slightly, the door opened with a slight creak, and I had to lie down flat to look through it.

To my surprise there was a beautiful garden behind the mini-door. And it was so big I thought I was on Punk'd. I just found it impossible for that to be so big. But that dang feeling in the pit of my stomach got stronger again, and I just had to get in there.

"Note to self" I thought "How am I supposed to get in there?"

Realization struck me when I realized that I can't get in there.

Bummer.

With a sigh, I turned around and got ready to search the room for a place out. I needed to get back home, one way or another. I was getting ready to walk away when I chanced a glance at the magic table to see if it would help me again.

Sure enough, right on the top was a bottle that said "DRINK ME". I stared at it for a few seconds before rubbing my eyes and looking back. It was still there. Okay this place is seriously freaking me out. I mean, I am a mage and everything, but there is a limit.

I cautiously walked toward the table, making sure the bottle didn't sprout legs and run away. I wasn't aware the gold key was still in my hand before I dropped it on the table when I opened my hand to grab the bottle.

I held the medium—sized bottle in my hand for a few minutes. What if it was poison? I shook my head at my nonsense. Who would want to poison me? I took a deep breath before placing the rim on my lip and swallowing.

A slow rumble started in my chest and spread its way through my body. Little sparks started fizzling in my ear, as I wondered what the heck was going on. The temperature would drop a hundred degrees, and then rise another two hundred, before dropping again.

Ow. Ow. OW! The sparks left my ear and started exploding in my chest. It hurt like crazy! I clawed at my chest, trying to get whatever was there out. Then, as suddenly as it started it stopped. I slowly opened my eyes and tried to stand up.

Huh? Was that big statue there before? Who would put glass on top of a statue? Wait a minute…. HOLY CRAP!!

I spun around quickly, my eyes darting around the room. I shrunk! I'm only a few inches tall! Come on, I was short enough before, but this is just ridiculous! The little bottle- now bigger than me- was rolling around on the floor. Getting home is going to be some much more tough now.

I looked around, trying to find the right path, until my eyes landed on the door. Wait a minute… Me+ Drink = A way to get through the door! I ran excitedly to the doorway, extremely joyful. I grabbed the door knob and pulled. And pulled. And pulled.

CRAP!! Where the heck is the key? I tried to remember where I put it last. The table! I looked up expectantly t what I previously thought was a sculpture, and sure enough there was the key… Right in the middle…. Extremely out my reach. Drat!

I turned defeated, back to the door. And guess what? You'll never get it. Come on, guess. Give up? Okay, right in front of the door, in a nice little box- even little to me- was a box with the words "EAT ME" on it. Awesome, right?

I walked over o it, confident, and lifted the top. I peered into it and, looking all delicious, was a pretty little cupcake. Who the heck comes up with this stuff? I lifted the treat to my mouth, and took the tiniest of bites.

It was surprisingly delicious. But, sadly, I wasn't able to enjoy it due to the familiar pain coursing through me. I clutched my chest again, but this time it lasted slightly longer. Thankfully it was over. I opened my eyes and felt that I was extremely uncomfortable.

COME ON!! I grew too big. This isn't funny. And I think I'm sitting on the glass table. Well, at least my clothes grew with me. But that seems to be the only good thing. Why am I here? Did daddy send me her? For training? Did I do something bad?

During my self ranting, my eyes began to fill with tears of frustration. I felt them rolling down my cheeks, and crashing onto the floor. In a few seconds the water was above my head and I couldn't breath. I did the first thing that came to mind: swim.

I swam upward, looking for the surface, but it was taking a while. Where the heck am I? The room really couldn't be this big.

I finally broke to the surface. My burning lungs took in oxygen appreciatively. I floated on the top for a while, trying to calm down, and figure out where I was. I was so caught up, I didn't notice the figure approaching me, until its head popped out, and caused me to scream.

"Calm down!" it said.

It was a mouse. Seriously, it was a girl with big mouse ears, and pointy black hair I spikes. She was smiling widely at me, and was dressed at what looked like to be a very expensive swim suit. Her golden eyes seemed impossibly large for her face, and her skin was inhumanly pale. But she was a mouse. At least I think she is.

"Hello" she said in a soft voice.

""Err… Hi?" I replied.

"What are you? You look strange."

"Um, yeah. I'm a- a human. Are you a mouse?" I asked.

She nodded hyperley.

"Yup! Let's talk about something!"

That was sudden. I talked about the first thing that came to my mind.

"Well, my sister, Jocelyn, wants a new cat. It was really white, fluffy, and fat. And-"

She held up her little hand. She narrowed her eyes and glared at me.

"I don't wanna hear about cats. Goodbye".

With that she swam away, and left me floating there. Wow. Well, I should get gong if I ever want to get home.

Ayah, I'm tired. After swimming for like, an hour, I finally found land. For the past 15 minutes I have been walking. I was in some sort of forest. The light was being blocked by a canopy above and, frankly, I could use the light.

I finally came to a big rock, in the exact place where the sunlight was shining on the ground. I just realized how exhausted I was. I slumped up against the boulder, and prepared to take a nap.

"Excuse me, please get off my rock."

I looked up to see boy, a very beautiful boy, sitting on the top of the rock smoking a hookah. He had honey blonde hair, and his skin was covered in scars. Moon shaped scars, in fact. Wonder how he got him. He did look to be in pain, though.

I stared up at him nervously.

"Um… Sorry. "I said. He just nodded and stared at me curiously.

"If you don't mind me asking, who the heck you are" I said bravely.

"Who are you?" he asked.

"Can you answer my question?"

"Can you answer my question?"

I glared at him. This was getting very annoying.

"Just answer the dang question!"

"Answer my dang question".

I stamped my foot on the ground. I only did that when I was really agitated. And this guy I was agitating. Sitting there with his legs crossed, an eyebrow arched, staring at me like I was below him. Well... technically I was, but that's not the point.

"Why aren't you answering me?"

He chuckled.

"Well, darlin'. Before you ask someone else who they are, you must first know who you yourself are."

I stared at him like he was an idiot. He was certainly acting like one. And did I detect a hint of a Southern Accent?

"I know who I am" I said, holding my head high. "I am Isabella Mari Swan, daughter of Lindan Swan, Lawyer Extraordinaire!"

Well, while I was here I should at least keep my alias. Even though I did not believe it, this still might be a test.

The boy uncrossed his legs, and smirked.

"Are you sure?" He said "You might be wrong!"

"What are you talking about?!" I demanded angrily. The nerve of him! Who is he to say who I am!?

He laughed again.

"Don't blame me when you find out the truth, my simple- minded sweetheart."

That was it. I turned on my heels and stomped away, leaving the bellowing boy behind. I kept walking, fueled by my new anger.

What the heck was that! I just trudged through a forest full of vines, and horns and then some stupid animal started chasing me! I fall when I run, and it somehow managed to take a bite of my dress. So now I limping down the path, my dress torn in several places, and the ribbon that was in my hair was gone. Stupid place.

"Hey down there!" said a voice. I looked up to see a really big dude with brown hair up in a tree, and I found myself praying that he wouldn't fall. He had a huge grin that looked very suspicious.

"Get down from there!" I yelled to him, hoping he would listen before he got hurt. He just kept smiling and stood up stepping around the back of the trunk and out of my sight.

"So, where you headin' to, Alice?" I gasped and spun around. There he was standing right behind me! How'd he do that? I stepped back and held my head down, feeling the familiar blush creep up on my cheeks. I was just so embarrassed he shocked me like that!

"I-I don't know. I don't even know where I'm at! I just want to go home" I told him.

His sill grinned widely, but his eyes showed understanding. He wrapped his arm around my shoulder.

"Well then, I'll tell you where to go, Bella." He said." Just follow hat trail right down there."

He grabbed my shoulders and pushed me in the right direction. I took about seven steps before I realized something.

"Hey, how did you know my n-"I turned around and saw he was no longer there? The worlds left my mouth silently, as I stared at where he was previously. I upped my hands around my mouth and yelled:

"THANK YOU!!"

My voice echoed, and I smiled to myself. I would like to meet that man again. I turned around and skipped the way back down the trail, happiness making me feel lighter.

I skipped further down until I came to the end of the trail. I looked up and saw hundreds of tables with hundreds of empty chairs. What the heck?

"Hey you!" said a voice.

I turned around and saw a very pretty blonde woman and a less pretty woman with caramel hair apparently having a tea party. The little mouse I met earlier was sleeping in the middle of the huge tale.

"You" said the blonde" Can't join us. There's no room. No room!" she said, turning her nose up to me. I cocked an eyebrow at her and walked closer.

"Whaddya mean there's no room. It's practically empty in here!" I motioned to the hundreds of empty places. She gave me an icy blue glare. If looks could kill, they would be writing my obituary right now. The caramel- haired woman smiled at me.

"Please excuse the Hatter" she said softly.

"Shut up, Hare!"

"Can we please just do what we are supposed to do?"

The Hatter huffed and turned to me.

"If a tree falls and no one's there to hear it, does it make a sound?" she said.

I just stared at her stupidly. The caramel haired woman said:

"How do you top a car?"

I just stared. This place was getting more and more confusing since I've been here… Wait, exactly how long have I been here? What time is it?

I didn't notice I said the last question out loud until the Hatter raised an expensive watch to her eyes.

"6 o'clock".

"What! It's already six o'clock?!"

The caramel haired woman smiled at me.

"Don't worry; it's always 6 o'clock here."

She must have seen my confusion because she giggled and said:

"You see, time cursed the hatter because she stole her boyfriend".

The hatter sniffed and flipped her hair.

I did not, I did her a favor. He was a terrible kisser."

"I'm LATE, I'M LATE!!!" said a familiar voice. At that moment the rabbit ran past me. I got myself together and ran after him, waving over my shoulder.

……………………………………………………………………………………………… He was fast! I didn't even notice where we were until I came to a huge door he passed through a few seconds ago. Isn't it polite to knock? I shrugged and threw caution to the wand, grabbing the knob and turning it.

What I saw almost made me walk out again.

Sitting there in superior glory was a woman dressed in all red with heart patterns. Her face was covered with a veil, but you could see her pale skin, and brown hair falling over her shoulders in waves. Right next to her stood the rabbit-boy, not looking like he just ran 5 miles.

It was then I noticed she must be a queen. Well, that explained the throne. I looked down at my clothes and realized I look like a mess. My hair had twigs in it, and my dress was ripped and torn in places, smudged with dirt. To top it all of, one of my shoes came off. How didn't I notice that?

"Isabella" said the Queen in a soft, rich voice "You have caused disruption in my kingdom, and therefore have been charged with mutiny. Your defense?"

That was it. I exploded.

"WAIT ONE FLIPPIN SECOND! I COME HERE BECAUSE OF THAT STUPID BUNNY OVER THERE, AND SOOO MANY PEOLE PISS ME OFF. I SHRUNK, GREW, ALMOST DROWNED, GOT AGGRIVATED BY SOME BOY, CONFUSED BY A BIG CHUNK OF A BOY, AND GOT MISTREATED BY A HATTER, WHATEVER THE HECK THAT IS. AND KNOW YOU HAVE THE GUTS TO TELL ME, I WAS THE ONE DISRUPTING PEOPLE. HELL NO!" I screamed. When I finished I was breathing heavily, my face flushed with anger.

The queen looked down at me, before pointing a little scepter and saying

"Attack".

A bunch of little card men came at me. So what? I'm a mage!

"Bring it on!" I said.

"TEGO TEXI TECTUM!!"

I waited for the familiar surge of energy to course through me but nothing happened. I looked down and saw that there was nothing. "What the heck? My powers don't work in this world!!

The little card men came closer to me. I backed nervously into the corner, my hands up to defend myself.

"C-Come on guys" I said" We can work this out…"

They all jumped on me at the same time. I did what I could and kicked and punched with all my strength. Wasn't doing well so far. One of them hit me in the head and I started to black out, not before seeing flash of purple and hearing a soft voice.

He raised you well……… Rest now my darling…….

"Wake up… Bella, Wake up… Wakey, Wakey… BELLA!!!"

"AHH" I screamed, shooting up. Jocelyn was in front off me, shaking me roughly.

"You finally awake?" she asked.

I nodded. That was one weird dream. At least it was a dream after all.

"Good" she squealed" C'mon, let's go shopping!!"

I groaned as she pulled me up, and away to her car at that moment all thoughts of my dream slipped from my mind at left me at peace.

Done! Any questions, ask me! And review...please...please? AND IF YOU DON"T I"LL GET EVIL PIXIES ON YOU!!!