I am back, lovelies! I have 8 pages of my 10 page religion paper done. Seeing as I was going to be thrilled if I made it to 7 pages, I call this a win. But, more importantly, I have the next chapter of this done.

After I hand in my paper tomorrow, the rest of this semester should go much easier, at least until finals week in a couple weeks.

Since the end of this one is kind of depressing again, I made the beginning happy. :) P.S. Loved all the reviews for the last chapter.

I really hope you enjoy. :)

On their return home, Spencer decided he would finish his studies for the year at home. A few of the college staff had been told of his situation, and they agreed with the arrangement. Spencer was provided with the books and journals he would need (which he memorized in less than a day, making Derek return them) and he could call the professors during their office hours if he needed to discuss anything with them. Derek was also happy to pick up and drop off anything Spencer needed him to.

With doing his studies at home, Spencer had a lot of free time. He was still upset over his decision to put his mother in Bennington and he wished he could make it up to her somehow. After talking about it and a suggestion from Derek, Spencer decided to write a letter to his mother. Every day he would think of something else to tell her, and every day he would write her a new letter. He also found the leather bound book Derek had given him at Christmas, and he began to write about his pregnancy. He found he enjoyed writing about it much more than he thought he would.

They had their next doctor appointment later that week. Spencer's doctor was pleased with his weight gain. She told him it was still a bit low for how far along he was, but for his body type he was at an ideal weight. He was given another ultrasound to see how the baby was doing.

As the nurse moved the wand across his stomach, she suddenly smiled.

Spencer stared at the screen, eyes widening slightly. "It's a girl?" he asked softly.

The nurse turned her smile on him, nodding. "You're having a girl," she confirmed.

"She's beautiful," said Derek, watching the screen. He glanced over at Spencer, who was still staring at the image, so many emotions flickering through his expressive eyes.

"Would you like me to print some copies for you?" asked the nurse.

Derek nodded when Spencer gave no response. The nurse turned off the machine and wiped the gel from Spencer's stomach. As she left, Derek tugged Spencer's khakis back up from where they'd been tucked down under his bump. He leaned his arms on the exam table, placing a soft kiss to Spencer's belly.

"Hey, baby girl," he whispered. "You've left your daddy speechless." He glanced up to see Spencer watching him, and he flashed Derek a small smile. "You're such a beautiful little girl already," continued Derek. "I bet you're gonna take after your daddy for looks. My little pretty girl."

Spencer laid a hand softly on Derek's shoulder, jumping when the nurse suddenly returned. She smiled as Derek kissed his baby bump one more time before pulling Spencer's shirt down. She handed them a few prints of the ultrasound and sent them on their way.

….

Derek, with Spencer's permission, sent one of the prints to his mother, telling her it was a girl. He excitedly showed the others to Liz and his friends. The guys had congratulated them and Liz had squealed so loudly that Clooney started barking and running around the apartment. Liz had later brought them a plate of sugar cookies with pink frosting. When Derek decided to try one of the delicious looking cookies later, he discovered only a dusting of crumbs left on the plate. Spencer's lips tasted extra sugary that night.

Staying home all day quickly became boring for Spencer. It hadn't take him long to finish his course work (thirteen days, actually) and it made him anxious that he could no longer work. Derek's buddies offered to pay him for tutoring lessons in the subjects they weren't good at (which seemed to be anything that wasn't sports related) and Liz told him he could help with her hand-made jewelry business. He was crap when it came to making the jewelry, but he created designs that Liz told him were the fastest she'd ever sold.

Derek came home one afternoon to find Spencer lying on the bed, Clooney sprawled on his legs with his nose pressed to Spencer's stomach. He smiled as the puppy snuffled in his sleep, wiggling in Spencer's lap. Spencer glanced up as Derek walked over to the bed, smiling at him.

"Dogs don't like you, huh?" he chuckled. "Clooney loves you more than he loves anyone else."

Spencer grinned down at the golden retriever. "He can sense the baby, I'm sure."

Derek reached out, softly petting Clooney's pudgy, puppy tummy. "Smart boy, protecting my little girl. Might have to get him a special treat."

Clooney's head shot up and he gave a slight woof, wagging his tail as he leapt up and jumped from the bed. Derek stared after him as he ran from the room, barking. He glanced back at Spencer, brows raised in surprise.

Spencer grinned. "You said 'treat.'"

"So? I've barely given him any, how would he know what…" He trailed off as Spencer averted his gaze, rubbing a hand across his belly. Derek chuckled. "You've been giving Clooney all the treats."

Spencer glanced up at him sheepishly. "It's the only way I can get him off my lap."

"Pretty boy, he's a little puppy. You can pick him up off your lap."

"Oh." Spencer flushed, grinning slightly.

They both laughed as Clooney appeared in the doorway, whining. He ran forward, pawing at Derek's leg before running back to the hall. He stared back at Derek, tail wagging.

"Yes, Clooney, you've been a very good boy," said Derek. Clooney backed and ran down the hall again. Derek chuckled at Spencer one last time, patting his thin leg before following the puppy.

Spencer stared after them, a smile on his face.

Derek returned a few minutes later, lying down beside him on the bed. Spencer scooted to his side, resting his head on his broad chest and entwining their legs. Derek automatically wrapped his arm around him, hand stroking his stomach.

"Derek?"

Derek glanced down at the mop of honey brown curls splayed on his chest. "Yeah?"

Spencer was silent for a while before drawing a shaky breath. "I want to keep our baby."

Derek sat up quickly, bringing Spencer with him. He stared into wide brown eyes, his heart racing with excitement. "Really?"

Spencer gave a small nod. "But I'm scared," he whispered. "I don't know how to be a good parent, and… Schizophrenia's genetic. I-I could develop it a-and our daughter could too. And w-what if you can't handle that?"

Derek drew Spencer back to his side, laying them both down. "Spencer, I love you. And I love our baby girl. No matter what, I will always love you two and care for you."

Spencer clung to him tightly. "I-If I develop schizophrenia, and you l-leave," he said, voice soft and shaky, "t-take our daughter with you. Don't leave her to c-care for me by herself."

"I'm not leaving," said Derek, holding Spencer tighter. "I'm never leaving, I promise."

Spencer pressed closer to Derek, clutching almost desperatly to his t-shirt.

"Never leaving," repeated Derek.

The room was silent for a few minutes, the only sound was the faint snoring of Clooney, laying in the doorway.

"I'm scared too."

Spencer glanced up, surprised to find tears running down dark cheeks. "Derek?" he asked, concerned. He reached up, wiping at his tears.

Derek cleared his throat, eyes troubled. "Spencer, can I… can I tell you something?"

Spencer scooted up till he was face to face with Derek. "You can tell me anything," he said softly.

"I've never told anyone," said Derek hoarsely, eyes downcast.

Spencer said nothing, instead reaching out and running a hand gently up and down Derek's arm.

"I-It was after my dad died," began Derek, and Spencer could hear the struggle in his voice. He braced himself, sensing this was going to be hard to hear. "I was lost, looking for a place to belong, people to accept me. I fell in with the wrong crowd, got into some trouble with the law. And then I met Carl." Spencer didn't miss the shudder that ran through Derek. "Carl Buford. The man everyone thinks is my hero. Got me off the streets, taught me football, helped me get my scholarship. But it all came with a price."

Spencer shivered.

"He would take me to his cabin. It was fun at first, kind of a father-son thing I no longer got to do. And then he let me drink with him. I thought it was cool, made me feel grown up…" Derek trailed off for a few minutes and Spencer drew him closer, cradling his head against his thin chest. "The first time he did it, he took me swimming. B-But he wouldn't let me wear my swim trunks. He t-touched me, but I thought it was just an accident. But it wasn't. H-He…" Derek trailed off again, body shaking, breathing heavily through his nose as he held back tears.

Spencer felt his own tears run down his face. He ran one hand lightly up and down Derek's arm, the other gently caressing the back of his neck.

"For years, I-I let him keep doing it. Everyone kept saying how much I owed him, a-and I… I was so scared of what would happen if I told him n-no. The rest of my life was going so much better than before, and I didn't want to lose that..."

"Derek," murmured Spencer, his voice shaky with tears.

"I always liked boys, even before… But for a couple years after that, I tried to not like them. The memories were too much, it was too scary. I tried to make myself interested in girls, find one that I liked. But I couldn't, I met some really nice girls, but I couldn't bring myself to like them that way. Then one day, I decided I wasn't gonna let Carl control my life like that. That if I went around being terrified of being with a guy, then I would never be happy. I would never be able to find that 'someone special', as my mom always said. But I'm still scared," whispered Derek. "Scared that one day I… might be like him."

Spencer was sure he felt his heart break right then, and he held Derek tightly. He cleared his throat. "'I promise, if you told me to stop, I would have. I always will.'"

Derek shifted to stare up at him. "What?" he asked, voice shaky.

"You told me that once. You told me to never feel like I have to do something." He ran his fingertips gently along Derek's temple. "You're not like him and you never will be. You're a good person, Derek, clear down to your core. I can see that."

"Spencer," breathed Derek, a ghost of a smile flitting across his lips.

Spencer pulled him up into a soft kiss. "You're a very good person. Don't ever forget that. You may make a mistake every now and again, but that's only human. But you would never hurt someone intentionally."

"I don't know, I might hurt someone if they hurt you," said Derek, trying to joke, but it came off strained.

Spencer smiled slightly. "Alright, you'd never hurt someone who didn't deserve it."

Derek nuzzled against Spencer's neck, breathing deeply. "Thank you," he said quietly, running his hand idly across Spencer's belly.

I tried to do something... well, better with the ending, but I think my brain has officially logged off for the night. So, sorry, you're stuck with a crap ending.

Next chapter, I haven't the faintest clue what's gonna happen. *laugh* Maybe I'll use an nice sex scene as a sorta time jump. Any opposers? Haha.

Review, darlings?