Authors note: I do not own any characters created by J.K. Rowling. Full credit goes to her for all situations and information mentioned in any of the 7 books or interviews, etc. as well. However, the storyline of this fanfic is all me and the little voice in my head.
*age 9*
"Nerd!"
"I know"
And then she was silent.
Because I'd just agreed with her.
Me.
I'd just agreed with her.
About being a nerd.
About the thing she said. Knowing, hoping, thinking it would hurt me.
And I'd agreed with her.
I could see her thinking.
Wondering why I had agreed.
Thinking that maybe there was another meaning to it.
Searching for something else to call me.
Second-guessing her choice to call me that. The part where she called me that, as well as the part where she called me that.
It wasn't the first time she'd called me that.
It wouldn't be the last time she called me that.
It was, however, the first time I'd answered.
Not yelled. Not cried. Not told her not to say that. Not gotten angry at her. Not pushed her. Not yelled something back at her. Not like that.
I just answered. Affirmative.
And I shocked her.
And I wondered when I started agreeing with her.
Or at least: when I started to agree with her that I was a nerd.
Or just didn't even care about being one.
Or figured that was a positive – or at least not negative – thing.
When I got all A's and she all C's?
When I got to read all I wanted and she studied? And flirted? And gossiped?
When I fixed math problems and watched everybody else struggle on them and felt just a little bit proud of myself?
When I figured that, in the long run, I'd be better off than them because I'd worked for what I wanted?
Perhaps.
But I certainly didn't care anymore.
Or not that much anymore.
"Nerd!"
"I know"
But it stung.
Finally. I managed it. Both stories updated. And now I'm going to bed, because it's late here. Please review, follow, favorite!