Mystery Danny Theater 3000
By Futuramakid
Bitter Reunions transcribed by Skyechan
DISCLAIMER: I own neither Danny Phantom and related characters or Crow T. Robot and related characters.
Bold transpiring, non bold is on the screen.
They exit for their intermission. "So THIS is that lucky lady, eh, Danny?" Crow said. "What?" Sam said, confused. "They think we love each other," Danny said, "and all they've seen is the 'She's not my girlfriend!' scene." "It's that obvious?" Sam said. "Yes. It is. You'd have to be thicker than his DAD not to see," Crow said. "It's true," Danny said, "Dad heard I had a girlfriend when he gave me that ring I gave you. Didn't you read the engraving?" "Yeah, but what does Wes have to do with it?" Sam said, puzzled. "Wes?" Danny said, "give me that ring!" She gave it to him, and he turned it right-side up. "Oh…" Sam said, her voice trailing off. "So… Your dad thought I liked you?" Sam said, "Well, he wasn't being a liar at all." The sirens went off. "WE'VE GOT MOVIE SIGN!" Tom, Ron, Danny, and Crow screamed. Sam looked at them quizzically as she followed them into the theater.
PART ONE
Title Screen is shown. Depicted is a large vampire-like ghost with his hands encircling a fleeing Danny Phantom. Title: "Bitter Reunions". The caption says, "A Blast from the Past!"
Scene opens in the Fentons' living room. Danny is sitting alone on the couch, his chin resting in his hand with his elbow on the arm rest of the sofa. Jazz is in a chair reading a book. Maddie (standing) looks cross while Jack is a working on a large invention that looks like a giant hot water heater.
MADDIE: (crossly) Danny, this is becoming a problem. You're constantly late coming home...
Crow: (MADDIE) that Sam girl is calling twenty-four seven,
Danny and Sam in unison: CROW!
JACK (peeking from around invention): You're shirking from your chores...
MADDIE: Your grades are slipping...
JACK: (peeking around a second time) You're shirking from your chores...
DANNY: You already said chores.
JACK: I know. But when you don't do 'em I get stuck with them.
DANNY: Look, I'm under a lot of pressure. You two have no idea what it's like to be a kid today!
MADDIE: Come on, Danny. That's the oldest excuse in the book. There's nothing you're going through that your father and I didn't go through when we were your age.
Ron: (MADDIE) We used to be half-ghost too!
Danny: (laughs)
While Maddie is talking, Danny's elbow phases through the edge of the sofa he's sitting on. He shows a panicked look on his face but quickly recovers before anyone notices.
DANNY (hiding his still-intangible arm): Yeah? Well, I beg to differ.
JASMINE (closes her book and looks up): The reason Danny doesn't think you can relate to him is that you never take the time to tell him about your
Crow: (JASMINE) Pants.
Danny: (sighs in futility)
childhood!
DANNY (annoyed): Jazz!
JASMINE: (to Maddie) Have you ever told him how you met? About your first date?
Tom: (DANNY) Don't you remember? It was so stupid, grandpa hit him with the car! She had pity, and decided to take him to the Fish under the Sea dance.
Jack walks out from behind the invention and stands next to Maddie, both listening to Jazz.
DANNY: (more annoyed) Jazz...!
JASMINE: Where you went to college?
Jack and Maddie each put a hand to their chins, pondering this.
JACK: You know, Jasmine, that's a great idea!
JASMINE: It is?
MADDIE: What is?
JACK: This is!
Jack shows them an invitation to a college reunion party at the University of Wisconsin.
JACK: You can come with your mother and I to our college reunion.
DANNY: I can-
Crow: (DANNY) not contain my feelings for Sam.
Sam: (goes hysterical)
Danny: It's not THAT funny…
JASMINE: Wisconsin!?
JACK: Sure! My old pal Vlad is throwing a huge shindig there. We'll take-
Crow: (JACK) off our pants!
Danny: CROW!
the RV so the whole family can go together. You can learn more about your mother's and my college days, and while we drive, I can blather on about ghosts!
The invention Jack was working on earlier acts up and green goo flies onto Jasmine's head, spewed from a wildly undulating hose attached to the boiler.
JACK: Ha-hah! It works! I can't wait to blather on about that too!
The scene switches to the RV driving down the road. Jasmine is sitting next to Danny in the back of the vehicle.
JASMINE: (lookuing rather miffed) How does this happen? You goof up and I have to spend four days jammed in the Fenton Ghost RV?
Maddie is reading a map while Jack drives.
JACK: That's the Fenton Family Ghost Assault Vehicle, folks. Every button in this baby is a ghost's worst nightmare.
Tom: (JACK) and this one's Danny's! It displays a realistic hologram of Sam saying she doesn't like him!
Sam: (slaps Tom)
DANNY: Augh. I need some air.
Danny pressesa button in an attempt to open a window.
JASMINE: Don't press any buttons!
The RV suddenly has several various weapons appear on the outside of it. A laser shoots a tree and a good chunk goes missing, another hits a flying bird which is then trapped in ice, and another hits a guy in a car talking on his cell phone, charring his face and phone. Finally, a bunch of green goo lands on Jasmine's face again, ejected from a similar-looking hose as the one from before. She glares at Danny.
JASMINE: I'll get you for this...
The scene switches to a truck stop where the RV is parked for the night.
JACK: Get some rest, everybody! I want the entire Fenton clan bright-eyed and bushy-tailed when we meet Masters tomorrow.
JASMINE: Wait, wait, wait. Masters? As in, Vlad Masters? Who was named Affluence Magazine's "Billionaire of the Year"?
JACK: That's the guy. In college he was my best friend.
A picture of college age Vlad and Jack is shown featuring the two smiling while other students in the background are plotting to humiliate the two.
JACK: We were very popular guys. Roommates, lab partners, we did everything together. Until the thick fingers of fate stuck themselves right in Vlad's eyes.
A flashback scene is shown. College-age Vlad seems to be pondering over what to looks to be a miniature Fenton Ghost Portal while Maddie and Jack seem fairly pleased about it.
COLLEGE VLAD: I'm telling you, Jack, it won't work.
COLLEGE JACK: Bogus, V-man! It totally will. This Proto-Portal is guaranteed to bust open the wall into the ghost dimension.
Vlad still seems skeptic about it and moves closer towards the portal for a better look while Maddie and Jack move away from the device. Maddie begins looking over a stack of papers while Jack grabs the remote for the Proto-Portal.
Tom: (advertisement announcer voice) For more on the original Fenton Proto-Portal, watch Masters of All Time!
COLLEGE MADDIE: Jack, these calculations aren't right.
Jack doesn't pay attention and activates the portal using the remote.
COLLEGE JACK: BONZAI!
The portal starts working but then something goes terribly wrong and an ectoplasmic blast hits Vlad right in the face.
COLLEGE VLAD: AUGH! BOGUS!
Once the beam stops, Vlad's hair has turned from black to white. He turns away from the Proto-Portal with both hands over his face, his head smoking slightly. He removes his hands, revealing his face to Maddie and Jack who both gasp. The camera angle shifts to show Vlad's face covered with glowing boils and pimples, and his eyes glowing an electric blue. Vlad places his hands back over his face with a terrrified/horrified look in his eyes.
JACK: He was hospitalized with a horrible case of ecto-acne. It devastated him, and killed his social life. We haven't spoken since that day. But the good news is I think after all these years he's finally forgiven me.
Crow: (advertisement announcer voice) New and improved Jack Fenton! Now 20 percent more naïve!
Ca,era zooms in on Danny's face. Danny doesn't seem to share his father's thoughts.
Scene shifts to the following day. A shot of Vlad's castele is seen -- a large medieval construction with turrets, towers, and flags, all painted in white, green, and gold.The RV pulls up to Vlad's castle-mansion. Vlad meets the family on the steps.
VLAD: Jack. And Maddie! You've never looked lovelier, my dear. Please, please, come in.
Vlad ushers Danny, Jasmine, and Maddie into his home leaving Jack outside.
JACK: Vladdie, my man. It's good to see---
Crow: that you're not wearing pants either!
The door shuts on Jack's face before he can finish his sentence.
JACK: (heard (muffled) from the other side of the door) Hello? Hellooo?
The others walk through the main entrance hallway which looks like a museum show-room for football items.
JASMINE: (looking around) What's with all the green and gold? You're a billionaire! Surely you could afford-
Danny: (JASMINE) an operation for your colorblindness?
an interior designer.
DANNY: Jazz, hello? Football helmets, jerseys, cheeseheads; he's a Packers fanatic.
JACK: (still outside) Hello!
VLAD: Oh, "fanatic" is such a negative word. But, yes.
JASMINE: I don't understand. You have billions of dollars. Instead of buying this stuff, why don't you just buy-
Danny: (JASMINE) a life?
the team?
VLAD: (irritated) Because the Packers are owned by the city of Green Bay and they won't sell them to me!
Vlad regains his cool and looks over at Maddie who's standing next to him.
VLAD: One of two things my wealth has not as of yet, (chuckles), been able to acquire.
Maddie gives him a weak smile.
DANNY: (to Jasmine) ...Is he hitting on mom?
Crow: (JASMINE) No, he's hitting on ME!
Danny: I hate Jazz/Vlad pairings.
JASMINE: As long as he's got working toilets and mom says "no", who cares?
JASMINE walks off. Vlad is continuing to look at Maddie.
MADDIE: (uncomfortably) I'd-uh...better let Jack in.
Maddie leaves. Danny looks at an autographed football.
DANNY: Whoa, cool!
VLAD: Indeed. This ball was autographed by the legendary Ray Nitschke himself. It's my prized possession.
JACK: Heads up, V-man!
Jack barges in and tackles Vlad to the ground, grabbing the football.
JACK: Hah! I see you've still got the old moves.
Vlad snatches the football back from Jack.
VLAD: Give me-
Crow: (VLAD) some pants!
Danny: CROW!
that!
Vlad gets up and puts the football back where it belongs.
VLAD: (angrily) I never HAD any "old moves"! All those years in the hospital robbed me of that!
The Fenton family looks at Vlad silently, surprised at his outburst.
VLAD: (composing himself) Yes...Well, it gave me time to chart out a course for my life, didn't it? Make some decisions that helped to make me very wealthy, very quickly. And it never would've happened without you, Jack.
MADDIE: (looking a bit uncomfortable) Uh, yeah...Maybe we should go?
VLAD: No-no, you should stay with me! That's the whole reason I'm throwing the reunion here in my castle. Previously home to the legendary Wisconsin Dairy King. Just so I could-
Tom: (VLAD) hit on you, and try to convince you to divorce Jack?
Crow: (VLAD) hit on your daughter to totally alienate you?
Sam and Danny: (laugh)
, reconnect, with you, Jack. I insist you stay.
JACK: Well, I dunno. We do have a really cool RV.
JASMINE: (fakes a sneeze) Let'sstayhere!
DANNY: (looks at Jazz, then moves his hand in a planar fashion) ...Smooth.
VLAD: You know, Jack, the Dairy King's ghost could haunt these very halls...
JACK: I'll get the bags!
Jack runs off while Vlad smiles sinisterly.
Scene shifts to night time in the castle. Jack is wearing a nightcap and a pink night shirt over his orange jumpsuit. Maddie is asleep next to him. Jack suddenly bolts upright from bed.
JACK: Bathroom.
Jack walks out into the hallway, presumably to look for a bathroom while the vultures from earlier appear and follow him. In a different part of the castle, Danny's ghost sense goes off, waking him up.
DANNY: Oh, great. Just what I need: a working vacation.
Danny transforms into Danny Phantom and flies off to look for-
Crow: some pants.
Danny: CROW!
the ghosts. The vultures prepare to attack Jack when Danny's hands phase through the floor beneath Jack, phasing Jack through the floor to the hallway below.
VULTURE GHOST 1: Hey, what gives?
Danny flies his half-asleep dad to the bathroom and flies out.
JACK: Ah, sweet relief.
Danny phases back up to where the vultures are.
DANNY: Hi guys, remember me? (Danny smacks a fist into his palm while smiling a devilish grin as he speaks).
The vultures spy Danny, freak out, and fly off.
DANNY: (looking confused) Okay. That was almost too easy.
???: Ah, bright boy.
Tom: (???) Hello, I'm totally NOT Vlad Masters!
Danny turns around to find a ghost who looks vaguely like vampire. He has blusih skin, red eyes, black hair done up in "Wolverine" fashion, and he is wearing a white outfit with black boots, black gloves, a black belt, and a red-lined cape and high collar.
DANNY: (unimpressed) Ah, whatever. I was aiming for the birds, but you'll do.
The ghost seems to take amusement in this, raising one eyebrow.
Danny flies at the ghost and readies a punch, but the ghost stops his attack, grabbing his fist in midair and flinging him into a wall. Danny hits the wall hard, cracking the stone. He slides down it and lands on a stone bench.
DANNY: (dizzily) Whoa. Fast...Alright. Better stop fooling around.
Danny launches into the air and prepares to attack the ghost again when the ghost grabs him by the throat and tosses him hard into the ground.
??? (Vampire Ghost): My vultures were supposed to bring the big idiot to me, but you'll do! Danny Phantom, right?
DANNY: (holding his head) You...You know me?
???: Of course I know you!
The ghost phases backwards through a wall and Danny follows suit. Both wind up in Vlad's library.
???: You're the ghost boy who uses his powers for good. How quaint. Aren't you going to try to shove me into your ridiculous thermos?
DANNY: I...I don't want to fight you!
???: No. No you don't.
The ghost fires an ectoplasmic ray at Danny sending Danny back into a shelf of books.
DANNY: Get away!
Danny fires his own ray at the ghost but the ghost puts up a shield that blocks the attack.
???: Ah, an ectoplasmic energy blast.
Danny tries to use a blast on the ghost again, but the shield blocks all of Danny's attacks.
???: (yawns) So...Year one. Tell me child, can you do this yet?
The ghost splits himself into three identical copies.
Crow: (???) Now I can walk and chew gum at the same time! (evil laugh)
DANNY: No, I can't! How-
Crow: (DANNY) Do I love Sam? Let me count the-
Danny: (blushing) CROW!
Sam: (giggles)
are you doing all this?
???: Years of practice. Which you unfortunately, have no time for.
All four ghosts attack Danny at one time causing Danny to fall to the floor in pain. One of the ghosts attacks him again and Danny crashes into the hallway outside the library and falls unconscious. The ghost follows Danny into the hallway and Danny transforms back into Danny Fenton.
???: (surprised) The ghost boy is Jack's son?
The ghost transforms back to his usual self; Vlad Masters.
VLAD: (amused) Well, what do you know?
-Cut to commercial.-
END OF PART ONE