"Our envy of others devours us most of all"- Alexander Solzhenitsyn
He had been on a downward spiral since he lost their admiration. It seemed like a long time ago that they had looked up to him, called him boss, but in reality it had only been a year. One long and friendless year.
It was his fault, he supposed. The Nexus had failed him ever since that "waste of skin", as he told anyone who would listen, CM Punk stole his comrades. The Corre had been a joke, something he could use to further his career. Perhaps if he had paid more attention to the young men, had treated them with more respect and love, he would still stand with them.
Yes, the might Wade Barrett had fallen and turned into an envious man.
Envy colored him green whenever he saw the South African Sensation or the One Man Southern Rock Band. And why shouldn't he? All the stolen kisses backstage, the word of how in love the two men were made his blood boil.
Because that should have been him.
He remembered when he and Justin and Heath had been the talk of NXT. They loved the thought of being the next big things. Justin especially, the arrogant little model. Wade now missed his almost primadonna sort of way he acted, back then he laughed at it. And Heath. His fiery red head back then had been humble, had been a man who loved everything. Of course, their elimination had changed Justin and Heath both. It had set a fire in them all to change things.
And thus the revolution was born.
The Nexus dominated in the ring, Wade leading his team to victory against most of the WWE roster. Sure they met with confrontation but none bothered Wade. And in the bedroom he had his lovers, dominating them though not as harshly as he did in the ring.
And then he met John Cena, the man who had everything Wade wanted. John was the face of the company, a man who held the title, and had more money than he knew what to do with. It was only natural for Wade's brain to be envious of Cena.
Envy, as if often does, turned to obsession.
He led the Nexus in the ultimate destruction of John. He told them it was to make a statement. In all reality, it was jealousy. If Wade couldn't have it all, then he would destroy anyone who could. But in his mind, he just wanted to be like John. He though of the man and what he did more than he thought of his South African or Southerner. However, he could never tell Justin and Heath no. When they came back to him, he welcomed them with open arms. They banded together, with Ezekial Jackson, to form a powerhouse team.
Envy again tore everything away.
Ezekial became a champion and started living a better life. Wade wanted that better life. Wanted to take on living the good life to provide for Heath and Justin, so he went after Ezekial. When he got the title, he treated Heath and Justin different. He didn't know why he did it, he just took on looking at the world in a new light.
So they left him.
That was a year ago, a long friendless year. He missed their love, their friendship. He wanted them back.
But most of all, he envied the love the old him had foolishly given up.
He envied his old life.