Dean would never admit this to Castiel, but he had no idea what he was doing. Sure, finding an Angel's Grace sounded like an easy idea. In reality? Not so much. It didn't help that he had no idea what he was looking for exactly. Later that night, after Cass had gone to bed, Dean decided to ask the two people he knew were the most likely to know.

"So, let me get this straight. You have it in that mud monkey brain of yours that you are going to just find his Grace and make him an Angel again?"

"Uh…yeah?"

"But you have no idea where it is or how you are going to retrieve it."

"No."

Balthazar turned to Gabriel then, shooting him an 'I-can't-believe-you-dragged-me-into-this' look. To Dean's surprise, Gabriel took his side.

"Look, he's just trying to help, you don't have to-"

"So what, you just want me to tell him how it is?"

"Yeah, actually."

Balthazar was looking more pissed by the minute, the air surrounding his person practically crackling with his annoyance. He turned back to Dean, his eyes a dangerous glare.

"First is the matter of locating the approximate landing sight, tracking it to the precise location and if- if – it's even still there then he has to take it back in. Then there's the ever present risk of-"

"Whoa, there-"

"No, if he's set on the insane task of returning Castiel's Grace than I will not deprive him anything. He bloody well needs to know what he could do."

A trickling sense of dread spread over him as Gabriel crossed his arms and reluctantly nodded. Finally Balthazar turned to him again, his eyes blazing with something Dean could only describe as self righteous fury.

"If we manage to get it back – and this is a huge if – then when he regains it there is a chance he might be sent back to Heaven. Forcefully."

"What are you talking about?"

"Are you really that dense? I'm sorry, I'll use smaller words for your benefit – his Grace hasn't recharged in a while. So, you meat head, when it connects with his piece and becomes whole he might have the involuntary reaction of shooting off to Heaven. Oh, and in case you're really as dumb as you look, Zachariah is still up there seething from Castiel's little stunt."

"So then-"

"He gets it at last! Yes, your little idea – while adorable – would run the risk of sending him to his death."

Dean was getting real sick of this dick's shit.

"So what would you have me do? I can't just leave him like this!"

"Uh, you can and you will."

"Like Hell I will! He deserves to be given something back, not be trapped like a fucking rat in a cage!"

"So you'd rather kill him than leave him be?"

Dean turned to Gabriel then, the smaller man sitting in silence as he listened to the argument s it unfolded.

"Isn't there something you could do to stop him from leaving? I mean, you're a fucking Archangel, man. Isn't there anything?"

Gabriel had an idea; a very stupid idea, but it was clever enough that – no, never mind, it was dumb. Looking back to Dean, he realized that he had waited too long, the silence stretching out to the point that he couldn't just brush it off anymore. This was a really dumb idea.

"There…might be a way. I mean, it would be taking a page from Raphael's book, but-"

"Can you do it?"

"Well, in theory-"

"Would it work?"

"Uh, maybe. I mean, I guess-"

"That's good enough for me."

Castiel couldn't sleep, his dreams plagued with memories that only put his existing circumstances under a microscope. Stumbling into the bathroom, he shut the door and turned on the harsh yellow light to look himself over. The lack of sunlight had allowed his hair to maintain its almost black shade, his skin not quite the shade Dean had. His dark circles were getting bad, his human body unaccustomed to the severe lack of REM sleep he had been experiencing. 'You would think passing out would have done something about that.'

Placing one hand to his chest, he basked in the dull ache from where his Grace had once been. He wasn't sure whether he was grateful for Gabriel awakening his memories or not, the only thing they seemed to do was cause problems for everyone surrounding him. Using the restroom before returning to the room to grab the rest of his clothes, he took a shower while the sun began its ascent of the day. In the end, he left out the collar, the idea behind it now lost on him. Sitting on the porch he watched the sun rise while he enjoyed the silence of the moment. He didn't know where his brothers where while Dean remained in the room, but he had a feeling life was about to get out of hand.

In that respect, Castiel was correct. They remained solely in that cabin for weeks; Gabriel teaching Dean how to fly while Balthazar focused on ensuring Castiel's sword fighting was still at Angelic levels. They waited until Dean could glide short distances without landing face first before they relocated.

Dean decided that on the two month mark of their time together he would start the search. Finding Castiel on the dock by their new cabin, his feet dangling in the water, he took a seat to his left before bringing it up.

"Hey Cass."

"Hello Dean."

"Look, do you remember what we talked about before?"

"If you are addressing personal space, I would like to point out-"

"No, no, no, no. Not that, the thing we talked about…"

"You will need to specify, Dean, we talk frequently and cover a broad range of topics."

"Your Grace."

"Ah."

"So, you remember?"

"Yes."

"Awesome! So, I was thinking that maybe we could start really looking for it."

"Oh."

"I've been talking to Gabe too and he's totally on board with this. There are just a couple of things we're gonna need…"

Dean waited for Castiel to ask 'what' in vain as the man continued to look out over the serene waters. Something wasn't right.

"Dude, you okay?"

"Yes, Dean, I am…fine."

"You don't sound it."

Castiel spared a single glance before turning his eyes to his hands in his lap.

"Dean, as an Angel…I had questions, I had doubts. Sometimes it appears as though I did more so then than I have now. I rebelled for you, knowing full well what it meant. Being here, as a human, with you is the happiest I believe I have ever been. I am indecisive on my opinion on returning to the proverbial flock."

The ex-Angel turned his eyes back to the water then, leaving Dean silent and at a loss on what there was left that he could do.

"I apologize if it makes me ungrateful for your efforts."

Dean clenched and unclenched his fists, turning to face the same skyline over the lake. He wasn't ready to give up now, not when they had both come so far.

"It's fine, dude, but what would you have me do?"

Castiel didn't know how to respond. After the night Dean happened to mention the idea he hadn't really given it much thought. From the start it seemed like a pipe dream, something that seemed pleasant at the time but entailed so much more than anyone was ready for. He knew Dean was expecting an answer, but he didn't know what sort of answer there was for him to give. Castiel rested his arms behind himself, supporting his weight with them as he leaned back in contemplation.

"Fine."

In his periphery he watched Dean whip his head around so fast he could swear it had to have hurt. Still, Castiel kept his composure.

"…What?"

"Fine."

"Is that a yes?"

"Yes."

Even from his half view he didn't miss the winged man's struggle to not scream his victory. Dean was getting better at keeping his wings in check, something that eternally annoyed the ex-Angel.

"That's great, Cass. Look, about the stuff we need…"

Finally he looked at him, questioning with his eyes rather than his words.

"To be honest, I probably should have known this stuff since we've known one another for two months now…"

"Known what, Dean?"

"Right, uh, lemme see…"

As he began he counted the items off on his fingers as if making a mental tally. Castiel smiled faintly.

"I need your Birthday, Birthplace and time if at all possible."

"Oh…"

Dean caught the tone, leaning closer to the ex-Angel while Cass's stomach made a convincing impression of a sink hole.

"I don't know those things, Dean."

"What?! What d'ya mean you –"

"I was abandoned at three weeks on church steps in Pontiac, Illinois."

"Oh."

"I am sorry, Dean."

"Wait, Pontiac…Was it-"

"Yes, it was the same church that we discussed our past."

"Wow…"

"Indeed."

"So…I mean, I hate to ask, but what did you do for birthdays? Didn't you celebrate?"

"At the church we celebrated it on the day that I was received on the steps, September 5th. After I left…I relied my age when asked, but otherwise did not celebrate."

"Oh."

It was like clockwork, instantly the winged man was in protective mode. Castiel watched as he relaxed before patting him on the back.

"Well, we're gonna change that, so don't sweat it, Cass. Just means we're gonna have to do more research and when we have it all sorted we'll have a huge party to make up for the years you didn't."

"Dean, that's not-"

"Trust me."

He looked back into Dean's eyes, all jovial comments forgotten. He answered honestly as he always did.

"I do."

He then turned away from him, his hand remaining on Castiel's back as they both basked in the comfortable silence between them.