There were no words for the level of pain that came through me as the blast hit me. The world went white around me and the world tipped and turned and twisted until I didn't know what was going on and then I was hit into something that made my lungs shutter and my brain stutter, my heart trying to catch up with its coworkers by stopping. My leg seared with pain, and my body collapsed, falling feet that I didn't know the length of.

Everything hurt, my eyes wouldn't do what I told them and someone was screaming a high pitched agony filled scream. I realized when my throat constricted and the noise stopped that it was coming out of my lips and I cried out again in pain as I stumbled trying to get up, sending another bolt of pain through me. My backpack had done little to protect me and my leg was damaged beyond return. I wasn't going to make it anywhere on it.

My body was twitching with undeniable pain and I groaned, trying to reach the cover of the trees as every sense in my body went through over load. My limbs ached, and my lungs were wheezing to supply me with air. I could see again and what I saw was blood dripping down into my eyes and making it only hard to see and my mouth could taste the coppery substance trying to suffocate it.

There were sounds, the careers were coming back. I rushed myself, as fast as I could on my hands and one knee into the bushes, making it in just enough time as they came back into the clearing to see my handy work.

The mess was massive, with the pieces raining from the sky onto the ground, and a raging fire eating up what scraps were left in the explosion. The bombs had done their jobs and destroyed all of everything there. Even the tarp that they'd set up for a tent was in flames. There is nothing for them to salvage, nothing that could have made it through that. I was lucky that I made it through that. I need to get out of here. They'll be looking for me around here. I linger, not only because I want some kind of satisfaction out of what I've done, but also so that I can try and regain what was left of my sanity and physical self.

I somehow, using a tree get myself to my feet and use my shirt to wipe the blood away from my eyes. It's hard; I'm so dizzy that if I try to run fast my body will tip over. I have to keep walking though. I don't have to be too silent, seeing as the still burning wreckage is making enough noise that I can get away, but I have to worry about a blood trail.

I manage to pull my hood up to cover the blood, and my leg, which was so painful that it hurt to put any kind of pressure on it, wasn't necessarily bleeding, or if it was I couldn't see it through these black pants. Now I look for my axe. It's not on the ground but instead it's imbedded in a tree. I can't help but thank God and all the luck he's given me that I hadn't landed on it and impaled myself. While I wouldn't have died, because I am after all Destiny, I would have been gathered up for them to experiment on.

Because in the time it takes me to heal again they would have me captured and bound.

I try my best to make my way back towards the cave, but my body is being unresponsive, jerking and twitching. I couldn't put any pressure on my legs without feeling the urge to vomit onto the ground. I'm rocked to the ground when a stray mine goes off and after two more times I'm in so much pain from it that I decide that no matter how much noise it creates, crawling is better.

The mere thought of Haymitch, or my family seeing me dying painfully, torturously by Cato's hands is the only thought that keeps me moving when my wheezing turns into coughing. I hear a scream from where the careers smoke is coming from and I realize that the boy from the manufacturing district is dead, because they've realized that he's done his job to well. I didn't see the hovercraft with my watering eyes, but I hear the cannon and I'm trying again to go. I don't know if they are coming after me, but I think if they were they would have caught me by now. I'm an easy target.

When I can't make it any farther I collapse at the base of a large tree, hoping it'll give me enough cover. I drop my axe and my backpack from my back and try to gauge how badly wounded I am. My leg is mangled, unmovable even. I've been dragging it along me and all I can feel from it are shattered nerves. I can't heal it myself, it would be very suspicious. My head seems alright from what I can feel of it.

I can feel a cut along the bridge of my hairline but that is it. When night falls and the anthem plays I look up to the sky to see what damage has been done. They show the boy from District Three, and the one from District 10 who must have died sometime in the morning while I was asleep. Then the seal appears, telling them that the bomber survived. They know and they'll be looking for me.

The dizziness has left me, and I can walk on one foot, more like hop. I manage to drag enough of my strength back upon me when so that I can pull a fallen limb near me. It was a little short, but if I used it as a replacement for a leg then I might be able to walk. The first thing I do after that is use some of my stored up water and drink some, using some of it, very little of it, to wash the blood from my face, so I can see better. Then I eat some of my rabbit. It's not good but I don't have a real choice about it.

All I can think about is Peeta. Did he make it back? Is he okay? I can't believe he came through. There was some small part of me, probably the part that broke when he betrayed me and I found out, that hadn't trusted him. I had thought that maybe my Peeta, my best friend, was gone forever to be replaced by some kind of copy that the Capital took and twisted.

The boy from District 1, both from 2, Foxface, both from 11, and 12. That's all of us that are left. They'll be betting like wild on us now, because there are so few left, and they know our strengths. They'll probably drag our families into it, getting interviews and asking our friends questions, except I don't have any friends. It won't matter, as they'll find someone who knows me or even just has an opinion on me. It's been a long time since there has been a tribute from District 12 in the top eight, and there were two of us now.

I'm getting cold. I end up digging my sleeping bag out but I don't want to risk sticking my busted leg in it so I settle for putting it over me, after I rub some burn ointment on the burns that I got from the explosion. I manage from my spot to cover myself with dried leaves, and pine needles. I wanted to do what could, though I was no Peeta.

Somehow I managed to fall asleep again with my painful injuries sucking all of my energy away.

When I awaken again I nearly panic about being surrounded by leaves and the increased pain until I realize that it wasn't increased, I remember what happened and I sit up, forcing breathes into my lungs. My head cut still stings, and it might have been deeper then I realized but my leg is still burning with the same intensity as the day before. It takes me awhile to pack up, and get on my way.

The stick helps, I can now walk but it's slow going, and I almost trip many times. I have to around some things, and painfully climb over others. I'm making sure that my trail is covered and I don't lead them back to the cave. Peeta must be waiting on me, but I told him not to if I wasn't back. If Peeta really is my Peeta again he'll still be waiting, hoping I make it.

When I make it back to the stream I begin to follow it slowly back up to the cave. It takes me almost all day to make it there. Luckily for me though the trip is uneventful and I make it to the cave, unmet by others. I managed to eat the rest of the bird and the rabbit, as I was now hungry. No doubt it was my human cells trying their hardest to fix me I commended them and thought that when I got back to the Capital, or anywhere, I was going to take a long bath.

There's no Peeta at the sight. I don't worry though. I hadn't looked for any more fires but Peeta was probably a farther way away from the place then I was and I'll wait for him to return. I didn't want him to get caught trying get back to me because he was afraid I'd leave.

I couldn't stay forever though. I spend the time washing by the river. My head stung a bit from it but I had to clean every injury I had, so it didn't become infected. The last one I went for was my leg. The rest of my clothes, besides my undergarments are on the rock beside me. My pants though I'm slowly trying to get off, so as not to put extra pain in my leg. It wouldn't have mattered how delicately I did it. The pants had been tight before when we first started but now I've lost weight, so much that I could see my ribs. I didn't like to think that the whole world could be seeing me almost naked now.

When my pants finally come off my mind was blown out of the water. The entire thing was purple, boarding on black with bruises. It came to my mind that if I had been human I would probably be dead from this by now, the bones having splinted into an important artery. For now I settled with staring at it, trying to find actual cuts. There weren't any, all of it being kept in my body, out of sight, by my unnatural abilities.

It didn't take me much longer to wash after seeing the grotesque sight that my leg made. The clothes didn't stay wet long, as it was getting hotter here. I end up axing some fish. It's a difficult process, and something I wouldn't have bothered with, if my leg wasn't so painful. When Peeta comes back I can teach him how to catch his own fish, as I don't have the ability to catch any more. I even gather some plants that are close by to eat with my fish, though I have to eat the fish raw.

Nasty.

I do a lot of stuff in my cave, waiting for Peeta to show up. I braid my hair, too long, and lace up my boots, which I hadn't bothered with before because of my leg. It's healing a little bit, I can tell. I even use a rock to sharpen my axe. I slowly eat away at my food, and then gathering more. I'm having one of those days that no matter what I do I'm going to be hungry. It's called a hollow day back in District 12. I begin daydreaming about the food back in the Capital, and thinking about Haymitch despite my best efforts.

He has to be watching. Was he sad, angry? Was he even worrying anymore? I was taking pretty good care of myself. He'd been worried before I left I think. I know it wouldn't have been a good idea to wait until he woke up and tell him goodbye but that doesn't make it any better now. I still missed him. This is the longest I've gone without seeing him, or thinking about him. When I saw Peeta, someone from my old life it just drug all of those memories back up.

Were my family all right? Were they missing me? Are they eating enough?

By the time night falls I've decided to go look for Peeta, despite my leg. If anything it would be worse for me to just stay sitting there because my sanity was leaving me the more I stayed still without anything to do.

It's painful but I'm refreshed with a full stomach and a cool head. To make sure that if Peeta comes back and I'm not here I spread out a few bunches of plants that weren't there before. He'll know that I was here, where if the Careers see it they'll think nothing of it. Within two hours I reach the third fire. It hadn't taken long to find, as Peeta had left a trail, not being used to running in the woods like I was.

It hasn't been lit. The wood is still perfectly arranged, and the green leaves he'd placed on top were brown. Peeta set it up, but he wasn't here anymore. What had happened? What stopped him from lighting this fire?

I have to tell myself that Peeta is still alive. He has to be, I haven't heard a cannon go off and my ears were one of the only things that were still working properly and with no resistance. Will his name appear in the sky tonight and I was just not able to hear the cannon in my cave? I hadn't heard the cannon for that one boy who had died the day before. Had he run into someone he hadn't been able to beat? I can't leave him alone, as long as there might be a chance.

It's a relief to be doing something. I manage to pick up a trail of broken branches and newly destroyed leaves. The pain in my leg is unbearable but I sacrifice comfort so that I can stealthily move throughout the woods.

It's about that time that I hear it. The sharp whistle of Peeta. He's in trouble. I almost drop my axe, and my stick in my hurry to get to him. Instead I grit my teeth and infuse a little 'help' into my leg so that I can kind of hobble to find him.

"Peeta!" I let him know I'm coming, that I can hear him. When I do, I'm inraged. He's badly wounded, and tied in a net on the ground. He has just enough time to motion towards something off in the trees and say my name before a spear sinks into his abdomen.

The boy from District One has only the amount of time it takes him to turn around before my axe slices straight through his neck. The amount of strength I'd used sent me to the ground, but I didn't bother looking back at the useless, nameless, waste of space behind me. I crawl to Peeta, dragging my useless leg with me that now sent pain through every system I had.

"Peeta?" I ask as I crawl to him. Oh, no. He's curled around the spear. "Oh, God…" I breathed. "I don't know what to do." I felt the tears begin to roll down my cheeks because there is nothing I can do. I can't save a mortals life unless we are bonded. I sobbed as Peeta's slowly glassing eyes looked at me while he held his stomach.

"Did you blow up the food?" Peeta asked.

"Yes, all of it." I told him, smoothing his hair back from his face, and holding his hand that he held out to me, as if he couldn't see me and needed desperately to feel me.

"You have to win…" Peeta coughed, hacking up blood. Had I been in some other realm, or at home, I would have thought it kind of cliché but now I could see the blood, the pain, and it hurt me to see my best friend die.

"I will, for both of us." I told him, squeezing his hand for dear life. I hear a cannon. It must have been for the District 1 boy. My leg hurts. I disregard it in favor of making Peeta comfortable for his last moments, putting his head in my lap.

"Will you sing for me?" Peeta whispered. I barely caught it. I have to stop sobbing but for Peeta's death I could sing a melody. I don't understand why people like my song, but if that's all Peeta wants from me after all of this then I can find it in myself to sing something. I swallow multiple times before my throat clears enough for me to sing.

Deep in the meadow, under the willow

A bed of grass, a soft green pillow

Lay down your head, and close your sleepy eyes

And when again they open, the sun will rise.

Here it's safe, here it's warm

Here the daisies guard you from every harm

Here your dreams are sweet and tomorrow brings

Them true

Here is the place where I love you.

Peeta's glassy eyes closed. I can barely see his chest move but I have to finish the song for him, he needs it.

Deep in the meadow, hidden far away

A cloak of leaves, a moonbeam ray

Forget your woes and let your troubles lay

And when again it's morning, they'll wash away.

Here it's safe, here it's warm

Here the daisies guard you from every harm.

I can barely get out the rest of it.

Here your dreams are sweet and tomorrow brings them true

Here is the place where I love you.

Quiet, stillness. His lungs give it one last go before it stops, and Peeta is gone. The tears and sobs are harsh, and racking. Peeta's cannon fires. The mockingjays, the little thing that was on my token, they begin to take up my song in s tormenting kind of tribute to Peeta. He'd sacrificed a lot, and now he wouldn't get to love my sister.

I laid his head down carefully, as if he was only sleeping and I laid a kiss about his forehead. I released his hand and noticed beside me white weed flowers. I didn't have red roses but they would do. I know the gamekeepers will want me gone so that they could get the body but I can't help but to place the flowers on this chest and to remove the spear from his body. I can't stay. I take the pack off of the back of the District 1 boy, uncaring to how his body is treated, not even bothered by the body missing its head.

I can't stop staring at Peeta though. The boy that I'd been through so much with. The boy who'd loved my sister in silence, who'd saved us from bullies, who'd made sure that I always had a friend, that boy was gone and there was nothing I could do about it.

I turn, a foot away from him and I raise three fingers, kissing them before I send them up to the skies, honoring Peeta. I walk away, not looking back. Peeta was gone. I needed to suck it up. There was only one way I could really honor him, and that's to live. And kill those damn careers.

The mockingbirds fall silent as I get far enough away for the hovercraft to pick up Peeta's dead body. I have to wipe away new tears from my eyes. I wait until the birds start singing again before I start off again, holding my axe close to me, waiting for more to come out so I can kill them. I'd retrieved my piece of wood and it was helping my leg, which burned with even the smallest motions. It was unbearable but I'll be damned if it slows me down.

No one shows up though. I make it back to my cave with not a person to kill in sight. Sure, when I want to kill someone they don't show up, but let me be in the midst of something with no weapons and everyone wants a piece.

I sit in my cave, sleeping until dawn, and watch the anthem and the crest show in the sky. There's the boy from district 1, and Peeta. There are six of us left, just six. And I don't have any allies. I'll look through the supplies tomorrow. Tonight I want to sleep, to get away from the horrors of seeing Peeta's face in the back of my mind.

My dream is a soft one, one where I lay in a meadow surrounded by my family, with Haymitch and Peeta is there, laughing and poking fun at me and the world around him. When I awaken again I have to hold myself together and not break apart again.

For hours I sit there motionless, pitying myself, thinking of Peeta. Again it's Haymitch's face, sad worried, and Prim's crying face, Katniss' guilty face, that make me gather myself back together. Katniss would feel guilt. That twin of mine would think it was her fault, just because it was her name called. Stupid, but I could just see Katniss' face filled with guilt while Mom and Prim tried to tell her it wasn't her fault. I would have done the same thing for Prim if it came down to it. I love my family too much. I've taken care of these people for too long just to stop now, when it counts most. I think that they all know that, deep down in their minds. I at least hope they know it.

The boy from District one has several knives, two spare spearheads, a flashlight, a small leather pouch, a first-aid kit, a full bottle of water, and a pack of dried fruit. I groaned. Dried fruit. He must have been confident that he would win. I can only hope that the other careers travel so light. I bothered to eat some of the fruit before I wolfed down s few nearby nuts and roots that I knew were good.

I hid the useless spearheads, into a pile of rocks. I couldn't use them, and I didn't want someone else to find them. I force myself out and I find more food, three more of the turkey like beasts and start a fire right at the entrance to my cave. I just want them to come after me. As I roast the food I wait and wait for them to come, with my axe at the ready.

I don't know why they don't come. They could have put it all together and realized that I did all of this, or maybe they think someone else did it. They could think that this was an obvious trick, and whoever killed the District one boy is ready for them. I doubt they think Rue did it, or that they even remember Foxface. It's a possibility they think Thresh is to blame, but the last that I had seen of him had been him disappearing into the tall grass.

They'll play the games over again, I'll know then. When the victor wins they are place in a seat of honor, with their support team with them to watch their winning game. But I promised I'd win, I'd promised a lot of people that, including myself.

Eventually I head back inside my cave, after extinguishing the fire. I didn't want a replay of the fire invasion. According to the sky it had been a completely dull day, they'll probably fix that at some point. I snuggle down, ready to get some sleep again.

Then I hear the trumpets blare and I forget my stick, hobbling to the entrance to the cave. Sometimes, in some games, there are trumpets announcing a 'feast'. It's the only other time we get contacted by anyone outside of the arena other than the death toll. The feast could be anything to a real feast, to just a piece of dried up, and disgusting bread for us to compete for.

I wouldn't go but this could mean that I could kill some people.

Claudius Templesmith's voice sounds out through the arena. He congratulates us. It isn't exactly a feast. He says that we all need something, something important. He says tomorrow that there will be a package at the cornucopia waiting for us.

He has to repeat it once before I start breathing again. They'll have something for my leg. I want to scream in happiness. With it fixed I could go on the offensive again. I could make it through the games that way.

I pick up everything as he repeats it one more time. I need to get there. It was already late in the day. I need to take my time, because if I have to get back out in the clearing I was going to need to put a lot of weight on my leg, and I mean some that were going to make it a lot worse in the future. I would need to run there, grab whatever it was, and run back.

I didn't know if I could do it but I pushed myself to get to the clearing. I needed to do it. I had to make it through, and I would, without letting the humans on. With the pain coming from my leg I didn't think I would be able to stand not going to get it. How would I make it through knowing I'd wasted a way that I could have made it feel better? Its late before I get there, and I'm sweating. I'm glad that I got so much sleep because with the slow pace that I've kept, and the pain of my leg, and the stealth, I hadn't gotten there until sun up. The others must already be there.

I waited, looking around. Nothing had changed at all. The mess was off to the right, near the lake, and the path to the Cornucopia was clear, but there was no package there. Just as I began to panic the earth literally split open and up popped a table, slowly, with bags on it. I could see the District numbers on it and I stared in amazement.

It lost me time I needed, as out of the cornucopia came Foxface in a fast manner. I didn't know what she had needed, or for what reason but she zoomed off as soon as she had it in a different direction. Oh no. I couldn't waste any time gathering my breath or steeling myself, I needed to get to the table, before someone got there first and got my bag.

I sent a shot of healing through my leg, and took off. I had my axe in my hand as I came into the clearing but it didn't slow me down, neither did the pain. With all of the adrenaline running through my veins I could have been breaking my leg and not knowing it. The leg itself felt worse the more it hit the ground, and like Jell-O.

I made it all the way to the table and grabbed the bag. I didn't have time to assess it. My leg stuttered, and I stumbled but I kept turning to head back. Luck was again on my side that my axe was placed just right that the knife that had whizzed at me hit it, and not my heart.

I sputtered to a stop, and was bowled over by a body with blonde hair. I cried out in extreme agony as my leg was landed on. The scream that tore through me didn't distract me, but I'd dropped my axe beside me. I struggled with however was on me. They had a knife and were placing it against my mouth. I was scared as images came back of a knife against my mouth, of pain ripping through my body surrounding my mouth.

My arms were thrown down and I was unable to move any of my upper body and my lower body was as lost a cause as the top.

"Hello, Katfir." The girl, Clove the girl sitting on my chest grts me with a smile filled with malicious. This is rather unfortunate. "Or should I say lover girl?" She spits beside my head and I cringe away from the liquid.

"How's it going?" I grunt out, trying to sound sarcastic but the pain is eating me alive, nearly stealing all of my attention. I throw it some more healing vibes before I pay attention to the girl on top of me.

"Splendid now." She grins, nicking the corner of mouth to show me who was in power.

"Great. I'm doing pretty wonderful myself." I lied, she knew it.

"Liar." She grinned. "I told Cato that I'd save you for him. He's out there hunting now, for that little girl. The one that tagged along with you in the training rooms. He's going to take all of his pain out on her. What's in the backpack? Some kind of silly thing for your leg?" She kicks her leg behind her and I scream again when my leg sparks as if someone kicked a can of gas into a fire.

She opens her jacket, and in there are more knifes, different kinds, and lots of them. She takes her time selecting one with a curve to it, replacing the rather now plain looking knife into its slot in her jacket. I grimace on sight.

"I guess I'll just have to give them a good show, won't I? To make up for it." She puts the blade into my mouth and my eyes widened. I try to struggle, to buck her off but my energies are focused on helping my leg not become completely useless. I can't do anything yet. My brains locking down in fear.

"Let's give you a new scar shall we? To match the one at your mouth?" My brain panics even more. When had the one on the side of my face start showing? Then I remember hastily that if I was in too much pain that my energy would focus on the immediate threat. How long had this been visible? The Capital would ask questions, I'd have to lie. Or not.

For a mere second my eyes rolled back into my head as I used all of my energy to make them think it was in my records, to think that the scar had been there a long time. I made it be in my past. I hated that the 'spell' would also affect my family, and Haymitch, but it was better than them knowing. The last time someone found out…..

I didn't finish the thought as my energy returned back to the leg, her knife began cutting into my skin.

The scream that escaped me could be heard throughout the entire arena.

I know, I know. What am I thinking? But honestly, what could I have blamed the scar on? I had to make there be a spell where she changed it. How else was it going to be explained? I've had this part planned out for so long that it isn't even funny. I hope you enjoyed it anyways.

On to planning the next chapter, and to a night with no sleep!