A/N: Omg, last chapter! ... possibly. Still undecided about whether or not to do an epilogue. Let me know what you think and if enough people want one then I'll add one in. Mebh, your opinion is particularly important here of course. :) And I hope you like this chapter and it's like you wanted it to be. Sorry it took so long!
A huge thank you to my lovely, wonderful, amazing beta Antigone Rex, she is amazing and I almost certainly wouldn't have finished this without her. Go check her writing out, it's great. Also be sure to check out mebh's stuff if you haven't already, her writing is absolutely wonderful. As usual I do not own fma.
"Is that everyone?" Havoc called. The windows were boarded up, every crack and loose stone in the wall sealed over. Over a hundred people sat in the darkness, clutching whatever weapons they had been able to find. Mothers gripped rifles as their children clung to their skirts, their eyes shining with unshed tears. By the far wall a baby was wailing.
"All in! Breda confirmed. He pulled the heavy doors closed, Armstrong and Falman rushing to help. Havoc glanced down at the pocket watch Armstrong had given him. Twenty to six. Roy would activate the array at six o clock; that was what they agreed. When he did, they would all have to be ready.
"Alright!" He shouted, his voice echoing in the crowded hall. "You all know what's going to happen. In twenty minutes now, General Mustang will activate his array and all the creatures in Central are going to come running towards us." He prayed Roy had been wrong about that but they needed to be prepared for the worst. Both Roy and Armstrong believed that the creatures were attracted by alchemy. A transmutation such as Roy's... it would bring the whole city down upon them.
"The general believes that the array will be able to destroy all the creatures before they get close enough to harm us, but he can't guarantee it. We have to be ready to defend ourselves if the creatures attack." A murmur of fear rippled through the room but it was quiet and short lived. These people were civilians, yet they had seen more terror and death in the last few weeks than many soldiers ever would.
"All those who volunteered to defend the wall, come and see me!" Havoc called. He saw many people glance around in confusion but a small few stood up calmly, following him without question. Armstrong had seen to it that they knew what to do. Havoc walked over to the eastern wall, the weakest part of the dilapidated building. Dozens of buckets stood in the corner, filled to the brim with pitch and motor oil and petrol, anything that would burn. If the creatures managed to get through it would surely be there and these people would be ready. He handed the buckets out to the line of people that had formed in front of him, pausing only when he saw a familiar- and unexpected- face.
Anna accepted the bucket with steady hands, meeting his gaze as if daring him to challenge her for her decision. Her children, haunted and hollow-eyed, stared up from behind their mother's tattered coat. The eldest of them was clutching a small knife. He was about to move on but Anna grabbed his arm, her eyes falling to the floor as she spoke.
"General Mustang... this array he's designed... it's too strong, isn't it? It's going to require too much energy." Her voice was soft, with no hint of its previous anger. Of course, Havoc realised, she was an alchemist too; she must have figured it out. "Will... will he be alright?"
Havoc hesitated. But the memory of Anna's mocking words flashed through his mind and he spoke before he could stop himself. "No, Anna, he won't. But don't worry. You and your children will be."
There was nothing but white. The emptiness stretched out without end, no boundary line or marker to give meaning to the expanse. The otherworldly plane could have gone on to infinity or ended a hair's breadth from his fingertips; there was no way to tell.
He knew this place.
The emptiness stirred memories he'd tried for years to forget, sending panic fluttering through his veins. Roy forced himself to calm his breathing, wishing he could do the same for his heart. The scars on his hands ached.
"Just couldn't stay away, I see."
The high, thin tones seemed to pierce his mind directly, speaking to him without the interference of his ears or brain. A mocking, broken imitation of his own voice, just as it had been last time. Roy gritted his teeth, forcing himself to turn around and confront the thing that wore his form. It seemed he had barely begun to move and the creature was standing right before him, so close he could reach out and touch it. If such a thing were possible, of course. As before the thing wore the shape of his body, the faintest of outlines separating its own emptiness from the vast expanse around it. The same cruel, impossibly wide smile stretched across its face, the smile he had seen in the darkness behind his eyes more times than he wanted to remember.
"What is it you want this time then, General? Hmmm?"
"You know what I want." His voice was steady but he knew it made no difference. This creature could see through all his fronts and deceptions, could see his fear and his attempts to hide it. "And you know what I'm prepared to pay for it."
The Truth laughed. "Indeed I do." Its grin seemed to grow even larger as it leaned towards Roy. "Well then, General... shall we begin?"
Havoc threw down another lit match, watching as the latest wave of creatures, already soaked in pitch, burst into flame. Their bullet-ridden bodies blackened and crumbled, their grip on the building's edge failing as the fire ate through them. Havoc watched through the gap in the boarded windows as another wave clambered over the bodies of their comrades, their doll-like eyes blank and staring, empty of all thought. Havoc didn't know how long it had been since Roy had activated the array; it couldn't have been longer than a few minutes yet it seemed like hours.
Ever since the first burst of alchemical power shook the building, the creatures had been relentless. They had crawled out of every corner and crevice of the city, a stumbling mass of half-formed bodies and wordless hunger. They hadn't yet managed to break into the shelter, but it was only a matter of time. He could hear the steady thud of creatures throwing themselves against the walls, clawing at each other to reach the windows, the weakest part of their defences. Just how long would this go on?
Hurry, Roy... please...
Even as he thought it, Havoc felt guilty. He knew that as soon as the creatures were destroyed Roy would die too, that every second they fought these monsters was another second his friend still lived. But he didn't know how much longer they could keep the monsters at bay. If the creatures weren't destroyed soon, he knew they would all be killed.
The pain was like nothing he had ever experienced. Roy could feel it uncoiling from somewhere far inside him, the same bone-deep sensation of indescribable loss he remembered from when the Truth had stolen his sight. But this was far worse. It felt as if he were dying a thousand times over, drawing breath only to die once more, each life ripped from him as cruelly as the last. He sank to his knees, his hands curled around himself as if the wounds were physical, as if he could somehow stem the flow of his soul from his body. Distantly, he was aware that he was screaming, sobbing, tears streaming down his face as he knelt at the feet of his tormentor. But he couldn't bring himself to care. In the back of his mind he could sense the creatures being destroyed, could feel them crumbling into dust as if their deaths were his own. He could do nothing to stop the pain.
It ended without warning. Roy gasped for breath, clutching a hand to his chest. His heart was racing, a frantic, confused rhythm. He felt drained; weakened and more exhausted than ever before. Yet he was still alive. How could that be possible? The transmutation had worked, he was sure of it. So what had been the price?
"You seem confused."
Roy glanced up. The Truth was standing over him, its eyeless face staring down at him. He tried to stand but collapsed to the ground again, a wave of dizziness overcoming him. Stars danced in the corners of his vision and it was all he could do not to throw up. The creature above him said nothing, but somehow Roy could sense its amusement. Ed always said the Truth was a sadistic bastard.
"That wasn't what you were expecting, was it?" It continued. It laughed, a cold, humourless sound. "You humans can be so unperceptive sometimes."
"What do you mean?" Roy asked. His voice was little more than a whisper, his throat aching from the screams torn from it only moments before. "What price did you take?" The sick feeling of dread inside him grew stronger, curling around his stomach and squeezing at his heart. He was grateful that his life had been spared, but what had the creature taken from him instead? Could its judgement reach beyond him and into the world of the living, to strike at those he loved? Would their deaths be his fee? He could accept anything except that.
The Truth laughed again. "You really don't know, do you?" It knelt down until it was face to face with Roy. The emptiness where its eyes should have been seemed to stare into him. "I took your Philosopher's Stone. The one you've been carrying around inside you ever since you offered up enough souls to fix your eyes. Did you really think such a small thing as your vision would require such a high price? I never take more than is required. After everything you've been through, do you still know so little about Equivalent Exchange?"
Roy stared back, unable to respond. Could what the creature said really be true? Aside from the return of his sight, he hadn't felt any different after Dr Marco had used the Philosopher's Stone to heal his eyes. How could his body have absorbed the Philosopher's Stone without his knowledge? But through his confusion and disbelief a faint spark of hope emerged, growing stronger with every second. The creatures had been destroyed and he had not needed to die. He could return home. He could be there when Riza awoke, watch as her beautiful brown eyes opened, see her smile again.
Except... something was wrong. He had felt the death of every creature through the transmutation, had experienced every twist and turn of the reaction yet he had sensed nothing of Riza. He knew, somehow, that the array had not touched her. She was still trapped, still caught between life and death and now he had nothing left to bargain with.
The Truth watched him, dispassionate as always. "There's more, isn't there?" It asked. It leaned its head to one side, a note of impatience in its voice. "You humans never stop wanting more. You want me to save her, don't you?"
"Yes... please," he could barely endure the indignity of begging this creature for help yet he knew he had no choice. "Take whatever price you want from me. If you can bring her back, I don't care what happens to me."
It leaned forward, its insubstantial fingers brushing against Roy's cheek, just below his eyes. Roy could feel nothing. It was a complete lack of sensation, a total emptiness that made him shiver, wanting to pull away. "I think you already know what I want from you," The Truth murmured. "Just that which is already mine by right. That's all I ask."
Already its by right... the creature would take his vision again, sending him back into the darkness and this time there would be no return. His mind recoiled at the thought of being so isolated again, so vulnerable, so useless... yet he knew the loss of his sight would be inconsequential compared to losing this chance to save Riza. Whatever happened to him, he had to bring her back.
Wordlessly, Roy nodded. He closed his eyes as the Truth's grin widened, its empty, unnatural smile etched onto the darkness behind his eyelids. It seemed to hang there, suspended in the blackness; the last thing he would ever see. Its laughter filled his ears and he felt its fingers brush against his eyes again and then... nothing.
Havoc spun round, firing a single bullet into the eye of the creature that had broken through the boards of the window. Its hands reached up instinctively to clutch at the wound, losing its grip on the window frame as it did so. Havoc watched as the creature fell back into the seething mass of bodies only to be replaced seconds later with yet more grasping, hungry hands. It had not taken long for the creatures to break through the wooden boards on the windows and now they reached eagerly into the room, their jaws open wide and their doll-like hands grabbing at arms, hair, weapons- anything they could reach.
A snapping sound alerted him to the presence of another creature behind him and he turned, bringing down his knife quickly enough to stop the thing from biting his head from his shoulders. The creature howled, blood gushing from the wound in its shoulder but it grabbed the knife from Havoc, throwing it to the ground before he could try and reclaim it. The thing carried on climbing through the window, shattering the remains of the boards as it broke into the room, its thin fingers reaching out towards him. It grasped him by the arm, its grip far too strong for something so seemingly frail. He shot it, but no amount of bullets seemed to stop it; they only to delayed its attack. Some of the creatures were like that- seemingly invulnerable, immune to any injury or damage. Only fire could harm that kind.
Havoc could see Armstrong and Ed glance his way, alarm written clear on their faces. This was the first creature to successfully breach their defences but they all knew it would not be the last. Already dozens of others were fighting to reach the widened gap in the wall, pulling apart the already splintered and weakened boards. Another body started to wriggle through, and then another, and another. Ed, Armstrong and Breda were on them in an instant, cutting down each one before their feet had even hit the floor, but the line of creatures never seemed to end. Havoc heard a click and felt the familiar lightness of the gun in his hands that could only mean one thing. He had run out of bullets. His knife was gone, his gun was empty and now there was nothing at all between him and the creature. Its other hand reached towards him, grabbing him by the throat. He gasped for breath, kicking against it in a last desperate attempt to break free.
A sound like a vast influx of rushing water filled the air and Havoc's eyes snapped shut as a flash of pure, white light illuminated the room. He forced his eyes open again as the light faded, blinking and disorientated as the screaming began. The creatures were burning, their flesh consumed by pale blue flames, so bright as to be almost invisible. It had begun then. Roy's transmutation. He had said it would destroy all the creatures in an instant yet somehow Havoc had never imagined this. The creature released Havoc and he staggered backwards, driven back by the intense heat of the fire. He watched the thing burn before his eyes, writhing and screeching in agony until the flames scorched its lungs and seared the flesh from its bones. Within moments all the creatures were gone and not even their ashes remained.
Havoc gasped for breath, his eyes meeting Ed's across the suddenly empty space. The young man stumbled over to him, his blond hair streaked with blood, knives clutched tightly in both hands. He looked as shaken and exhausted as Havoc felt but otherwise seemed unharmed. From what he had seen, it seemed no one had been seriously injured in the fight. Another few minutes and Havoc was not sure they would have been as fortunate.
"He did it." Ed muttered, raising his eyes to meet Havoc's. "Mustang did it, the bastard." There was wonder in his voice, joyous relief and exhilaration at having survived. But Havoc could also hear the pain behind his words. They both knew what this meant for Roy.
Havoc knew he should take charge, do something to help the shaken, lost people gathered in the room, but he just couldn't move. Around him, everyone was still struggling to accept what had happened. He could see people staggering through the room as if through a thick fog, others collapsed, motionless, to the floor. Some were weeping silently, some laughing so hard they could barely draw breath. This time, no child cried.
But somewhere, someone was screaming. It cut through the chaos of the hall, through the sound of sobbing and laughter and the shuffling of feet against stone. It was faint yet it pierced through him sharper than any of the other horrors they had seen and heard that day. He knew that voice.
Riza.
Of course... of course! How could they have forgotten? She had been with Roy at the moment the array was activated and she would be there still, waking from her strange, suspended state to find Roy lying dead beside her. It was simply too awful to contemplate, yet they had allowed it to happen.
He looked across to where Breda was standing, helping Maria Ross to gather all the lost and discarded weapons that lay on the floor. Breda met his eyes before glancing upwards, his hands clenched at his sides. Havoc knew he recognised Riza's voice too. Without saying a word, the two men turned together, running towards the stairs. Riza's room was far above them and on the other side of the building. Havoc could only hope that they made it there in time.
Riza awoke in darkness, alone. All around her was silent and she could feel the chill of stone beneath her cheek. She struggled to sit up, exhaustion and dizziness washing over her. Her body felt heavy and stiff and her arms shook as she pushed herself up to sitting.
What had happened to her? She remembered the battle, the sharp pain of the creature's bite and the worse pain of knowing that she would have to leave her friends, that her death would destroy Roy. She remembered the devastation in his eyes as he saw her injury, the tenderness in his hands as he reached out towards her. The way the pain in his eyes had darkened, twisting into a terrible resolution, far too quickly for her to react. There was a flash of light and then- nothing.
Vague shadows of memories flitted through her mind; murmured voices just out of reach, the sensation of weight across her chest and figures moving past her in the darkness. Above all, Riza remembered his presence. Whatever had happened, Roy had been with her the whole time, she was sure of that. But he was not here now.
Slowly the darkness began to fade, like layers of fine veils falling away from her eyes and she realised where she was. It was one of the rooms in the shelter, the one where Roy usually retreated when he needed some peace to study or to talk with someone in private. A lantern burned in an alcove in the wall, its light weak and flickering, casting sickly shadows across the room and illuminating the stone floor beneath her. She was lying beside a vast array, its intricate, alien lines mapped out in black paint, a few drops of blood standing out against the pale stone.
The sight stirred a sickness inside her that grew only deeper the more she studied the array. She had never been properly taught alchemy but she had grown up surrounded by it and she could easily recognise some of the basic symbols incorporated into the complex pattern. The symbols for sublimation, for multiplication and ceration, for the exchange of a soul. The symbol for death.
Roy... Roy, what have you done?
The air suddenly seemed too thick, too heavy, and she struggled to pull it into her lungs, each breath a desperate gasp. Her stomach churned and it was all she could do not to be sick. She was a soldier, she reminded herself as she fought to keep the panic under control. She needed to keep calm and assess the situation rationally, no matter how awful and unavoidable the conclusions seemed.
A sound like a breaking wave filled the room and there was a painful flash of white light. Her eyes closed instinctively, her arms flying up to protect them. When she opened her eyes again, Roy was there, lying in the centre of the array. He was curled on his side as if thrown by some unseen force, his face turned towards her. He seemed far smaller than she remembered, lines and shadows etched into his face that had not been there before. His eyes were closed and he was not moving.
Riza rushed over to him, moving as fast as her weakened limbs would allow. Her knees ached from crawling across the stone and stars danced in the corners of her vision as she struggled to regain her breath. Ignoring the protests of her fragile body, Riza rolled Roy over onto his back, putting a shaking hand up to his mouth to check that he was still breathing.
He wasn't.
She fought back a scream. She lowered her head to his chest, listening for a heartbeat, for some sign of life but again, nothing. His face was so pale, almost grey, and drawn with pain. The screams she had been holding in broke free as she shook him frantically, her sight blurring as tears filled her vision. Some part of her knew she had to calm down, that her panic would do nothing to help Roy. Gasping for breath, Riza tried to remember the steps of resuscitation that she learnt as a cadet but it was impossible. All her knowledge had scattered in the face of her exhaustion and the sight of Roy's motionless body lying beside her. She could do nothing but sob, helpless in the face of this nightmare. She cursed her uselessness with each shuddering breath, screaming for someone to help, knowing that even if anyone could hear they would still be too late.
Movement... she could feel movement beneath her hands. Roy's body convulsed violently and he gasped like a man saved from drowning. She clung to him as his gasps turned to sobs, wanting to be strong for him but unable to stop herself from weeping too. Terror and relief and gratitude wrung huge, breathless tears from her and her arms shook as she wrapped them around his neck. Within moments Roy regained control of himself and she let him go, knowing he needed space.
"Riza?" He brought his hand up to touch her cheek, his fingers brushing against her hair. He still had not raised his head to look at her and there was a soft note of question in his voice that set the sickness stirring inside her again. Why was he not looking at her?
"Yes, Roy, I'm here." It hurt to talk, her voice rough with disuse. But she saw his shoulders relax almost imperceptibly at the sound, as if he had been unsure that it was truly her. Although surely he could have confirmed it if only he'd looked up. The light was dim in the small room but it should have been enough for him to see her. A terrible suspicion flitted through her mind but she pushed it away. She could not afford to torment herself with possibilities. "What happened to you? What happened to me? I can't remember anything..." Still he said nothing. His refusal to meet her eyes terrified her. "Roy, look at me. Please?"
"I'm so sorry, Riza." He looked up at last. Riza could see the tears on his too-pale cheeks reflected in the flickering lantern light. "I just couldn't let you die. I found a way to destroy the creatures and I did what I had to save you. There wasn't any other way." His eyes were open and fixed in her direction but he was not truly looking at her. His gaze was unfocused and distant, empty in a way that was only too familiar. Her stomach churned and her breath caught in her throat. No... no... not again...
"What have you done?" She breathed. "Why has this happened?" She didn't want to accept it but she could no longer avoid what she could so clearly see. Roy was blind once more; his sight stolen by the creature that called itself Truth. And this time she knew there would be no way of getting it back.
Riza listened in silence and wonder as he explained, his voice soft and filled with pain, so different from his normal commanding tone. It was a difficult story for him to tell and even harder for her to hear. She listened as he told her of the transmutation he had attempted on her and the strange, half-dead stasis she had been caught in, of the days he had spent scrawling transmutation circles on scraps of paper, of his confrontation with Anna and the distrust of the other survivors. She could hear the words he didn't say in the shadows under his eyes and the sorrow in his voice. How he had forgone food and sleep to spend every possibly hour perfecting the array, how he blamed himself for losing control with Anna, how people had whispered that he was going mad and he had started to believe them.
She clenched her hands into fists as Roy told her about the array, how he had activated it believing it would kill him but knowing there was no other choice. She smiled in amazement at the revelation of the Philosopher's Stone and dug her nails into her palms as he explained- his voice faltering and his head bowed- how the Truth had forced him to give up his sight once more in exchange for her life. She had never wanted to cause him any suffering but she knew she couldn't blame herself for this. She would have done the same and would have paid the price gladly rather than let him die.
"I don't know what I'll do now," He finished. He shot a rueful smile in her direction and if she ignored how his eyes didn't quite meet hers, it felt the same as so many other times before. She reached over and curled her fingers around his hand, squeezing lightly in reply. "I know there's no chance that I can get my sight back this time. But perhaps I can still be of use to this country somehow."
She pulled him closer, letting him lean against her. Her strength was rapidly returning and she could sit up easily now, but he was weak with exhaustion and still shaking from his journey to the Gate. She smiled as she felt his chest rise and fall, marvelling at how close they had come to losing each other and how lucky they were to have survived, even if at such a high price.
"Roy, you saved Amestris from a horde of undead creatures that the rest of the military turned and ran from. If it hadn't been for you, it'd only have been a matter of time before the creatures escaped the walls and destroyed the rest of the country. Right now, I think the people are far more likely to listen to you than to anything the military says."
They both knew it wasn't as simple as that, of course, but she felt sure the situation would not be as hopeless as he imagined. Warmth spread through her as she saw him smile at her words, but it disappeared in an instant as she heard footsteps thundering in the corridor outside.
"Riza?" Roy sat up, suddenly alert, his sightless eyes darting around the room, searching for the source of the sound. His hand twitched helplessly at his side; he was ungloved but she knew he would not dare attempt flame alchemy even if he were armed. It was simply too dangerous, even with her eyes to guide him. She wished she had her gun with her.
The door burst open, a pale faced, blood-splattered Havoc standing in the doorway, shock painted across his face as he took in the scene before him. He tore across the room, sinking to his knees before them both, tears forming in his eyes.
"Riza, oh god, are you alright? And Roy... Colonel... you're alive! How..." Havoc paused, struggling to catch his breath. "Riza, god, when I heard your voice... I thought... I thought..."
"It's alright, Jean," Roy broke in. Riza marvelled at how easily his voice slipped into the calm authority of command despite all that he had been through. "I know what I told you but I was wrong. The Truth didn't ask for my life as payment for killing the creatures. It took my sight again, but considering how bad things could have been..."
For a moment Havoc looked stricken at this news, disbelief flashing across his face at the calm, resigned way Roy announced his loss. But then he nodded once, drawing in a deep breath before speaking again.
"The array worked, Colonel. All the creatures disappeared and injuries to both civilians and military personnel are very minor. Breda will be getting here shortly, he can help me take you both back to the main hall, we have medics that can look at you there..." A huge smile broke across his face, standing out in stark contrast to the tears streaming down his cheeks. "I... I can't tell you how happy I am that you were wrong this time, Roy."
Roy laughed, the first sign of joy Riza had heard from him for far too long. "For once, I feel the same way, Jean." His hand sought hers again, linking their fingers together.
"Even though the creatures are dead, things aren't going to be easy from now on. But I've been given a second chance," His thumb stroked across the back of her hand, his fingers soft against her calloused palm. His eyes still glanced in the direction of Havoc's voice but she knew his words were meant for her. "And I mean to make the most of it."
Thanks for reading! Please review if you can, it will make me happy. x