Disclaimer: Nope, ownership still refuses to be mine.

Mystic: Leave it to RenzokukenZ to request something rather dark. It's okay though. He's my friend and I'm up to the challenge. He asked to know how Kuja got so skilled with the Kama Sutra, since I do mention that fact quite a bit in Tantric and in here. So, college guy gave me an idea and now I'm running with it. This chapter takes place considerably after the game and stands alone when it comes to my other fics. But just for old times sake ... (Mystic takes out magical mp3 player)

It really didn't make sense
Just to leave this unresolved
It's not hard to go the distance
When you finally get involved face to face

"Face to Face"
Daft Punk

Hilda was silent, her lips pursed together in a straight line of frustration. Her usually smiling face was now stern and ice-cold. Kuja watched his golden sorceress waddle out of his chambers in a huff. Yes, waddle. Hilda's regal manner of walking had been cutely replaced with the awkward gait of a penguin, she was that large with child.

His golden canary waddled, and she was angry.

At him.

"Stop fretting over me!" Hilda loudly yelled shortly before waddling--er, storming out. "I am not a helpless child!"

Nay, but you are carrying my offspring. Kuja thought as he watched his sorceress exit into the adjacent hallway. The Silver Wizard just didn't have the heart to speak those words floating through his mind. Partly, because he didn't want to further annoy the mother of his child. Expectant Hilda plus large amounts of anger equals a beautiful silver oglop. That's correct, she turned his dragon into a bug. A disgusting little bug. Kuja was up half the previous night conjuring a chant that would transform his precious dragon back to it's true form. Luckily, she used a different spell this time and he didn't have to fetch her to reverse it.

There was another reason, of course. Hilda was correct to accuse her silver lover that he was fretting over her.

'Put that down, dear canary. It is much to heavy.'

'Hilda, please cease the cleaning. You'll exhaust yourself.'

'You should eat something love. You are rather pale.'

At least now she was retreating to his library. Her mind would be occupied by whatever tome she chose to study for a few hours. No worry about overpushing herself there. In her anger though, the lady of Ipsen's Castle didn't think to ask her wizard why he was so concerned about her wellbeing. And if Hilda would actually calm down enough to listen to her unborn child's father, maybe she would learn why he was so protective of her.

Kuja pinched the bridge of his nose, letting a heavy sigh escape his chest. Damn, he did not care for that particular memory to resurface. It did however, just seeing Hilda's swollen stomach was enough to unleash his twisted subconcious.

The memory was of a young girl, barely fifteen years of age, purchased from a slave trader. Kuja, then a young man while still an innocent himself, bought this young virgin simply for the purpose of sex. She was called Rhianna and she served Kuja as a mistress; nothing more. Sex was her only duty.

Rhianna was a silent creature, only giving a small nod of her head whenever Kuja called her to his chambers. Sex was highly awkward in their beginnings as master and slave. He had been virgin too and consequently, neither had any rhythm or immediate skill. Their only source of information was a mint condition, leather bound copy of the Kama Sutra. Every night, a new position. They went through each page one by one and gradually their skills improved, until finally, the casbah was being genuinely rocked each evening. Their cries of passion and release could be heard well into the early hours of the morning. The arrangement was a good one. Sex and nothing more. The master and the slave.

But Kuja made one deadly error.

In his own naiive innocence, the silver wizard felt that young Rhianna was too young to bear any children and therefore, he did nothing to prevent a child from forming. Sure, he knew of the medicinal herbs that women could take to prevent pregnancy, but Rhianna was just too young, he thought.

He thought wrong.

Almost a year into their sexual relationship, Rhianna missed a cycle and a pregnancy was confirmed shortly afterwards. Garland gave his genome strict orders to "take care of it". Reluctantly, Kuja prepared the potion that would completely cleanse Rhianna's fertile womb. The sex slave would live, but the life inside her would come to an abrupt end. But just as quickly as the wizard mixed the abortificiant herbal drink, he just as quickly threw it out the window. Something inside Kuja's presemed soulless heart prevented him from giving his mistress the drug. He just could not do it.

So Garland did. The older man gave Rhianna the potion and the naiive girl drank it without question, suspecting nothing except a mug of warm tea. She began to bleed within the hour. Kuja watched in sheer horror as her life started to seep out from between her legs as her screams of pain echoed in the castle walls. Her voice that Kuja liked to hear moan in pleasure was now shrieking in shrill hurt. Garland purposefully gave the sex slave an overdose.

Rhianna died minutes after a tiny corpse slid from her uterus. The little creature was no bigger than Kuja's thumb, but realization that his offspring was right there in a tangled mess of blood and tissue, Kuja lost all thoughts and emotions at that point.

Both bodies were burned and Rhianna's soul sent to Terra. The soul of the foetus sent as well. Garland was in a bit of shock when he discovered that the foetus had a soul, but was unnerved and both were transfered to the sub-planet.

No other mistress lasted as long as Rhianna did. When Kuja took another one, she took medicinal herbs every evening to prevent another incident, but after a few months, Kuja would send her to Garland where the older man would claim her soul. At least that arrangement didn't end in a pregnancy termination.

So, why was Hilda different? Something about the Lindblum scorned wife prevented Kuja from treating her the same way as his previous love slaves. He refused to cast her aside to Garland's use. What was it? What was so different about her?

The Silver Wizard had yet to figure out. But Kuja did know this. As long as Hilda was in his care and his cage, no harm would come to her or their unborn child. Garland was dead, so he would not be in the way. Hilda's annulment to Cid was granted ages ago, so nothing it seemed would threaten them.

But still, just to be sure, Kuja would continue to fret over his golden sorceress.

Mystic: Er ... I wrote angst. Let's do something to fix that. (Mystic storms a college campus and kicks in a dorm room door)

RenzokukenZ: The hell?! (recognizes mystical author) Oh, hi Mystic. Did another paintball tournament warp your mind?

Mystic: (unsheathes kickass sword) You!

RenzokukenZ: (sigh) Not the gay bar thing again.

Mystic: Nay, friend. You requested angst and darkness. (steps closer with sword drawn) My name is MysticSpiritus. You killed my happy fairy. Prepare to die. (slash)

RenzokukenZ: (blocks with own kickass sword) You seem to have a strong taste for revenge. (slash, clash, parry) And yet, I am not that comfortable fighting a woman.

Mystic: (parry, clash, slash) Don't think of me as a woman. (pauses briefly to put up hair) There, now I'm a man.

RenzokukenZ: (swordfight leads into hallway) A bit inconceivable, Mystic.

t3h maniac: Hey guys? (sword pause in mid clash) Wouldn't it be easier to settle this in a way that didn't involve one of you dying?

Mystic: And why should we listen to you? (RenzokukenZ nods in agreement)

t3h maniac: Because, unlike other authors, I speak with an English accent! Haha! Review!