Disclaimer: I own nothing. Period.
A/N: Hi! Not much to say here. . .uh, the beginning of this chapter takes place the night after 'Snape's Worst Memory', if anyone gets confused.
Here's the replies to my wonderful reviewers:
moona: Aw, thank you so much! I'm glad I could make you laugh! Reviews like this make my day!
PrincessMia737: -Smiles- You think it's funny? Thank you!
Julia: Thank you!
SunnyKate and MoonyMeg: LoL, I feel sorry for her too.
BlackHoodie87: Yes, I think Sirius learned his lesson. I doubt Claire will come back into the picture though. . .thanks for reading and reviewing!
kara: Yeah, I had that in my head to write for sometime. I don't know, though. When I'm actually writing the chapter, I think it's good, but when I actually read over it. . .I don't, it doesn't seem as great, you know? LoL, thanks for R&R: )
cd lover: I really want to use the Simpson's thing in the story (LoL, that would be a good one, the whole Lily leaving a scar from her fingernails in his shoulder), I just have to figure out how to put it in. Alice danced with Fredricko Marketrick (LoL, I love making up names) and Tod Goldilocks (LoL, I don't know why it's so funny to me. . .). Emma danced with Marcus Deblow and George Smeltings (LoL-I'll just shut up).
Yes, this Alice is going to be Alice Longbottom. I'm not going to start their relationship till 6th or 7th year though. But yeah, she will be the future Mrs. Longbottom.
Absh:-)
Saphra: I've had to SQUARE DANCE with boys. THAT was embarrassing, LoL. Urgh, was that embarrassing. . .and, yes, I understanding dancing with total jerks too. Square dancing with total jerks.
-ShIvErInG sMiLe- : Thank you! I update my C2 alot, and I hope there's some good stories there.
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Chapter 12-The Tiny Misunderstanding
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". . .I'm not that conceited, am I?"
Sirius groaned in exasperation at James as Remus showed Peter how to pack his trunk with a simple spell.
"It's very simple, Peter. Just one small swish here, and one long flick to the left, then a slow, short swish upwards-ow! That was my eye, Peter! Your suppose to flick upwards, not into my eyeball!" Remus yelled painfully, holding his left eye.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry-" Peter kept repeating over and over again.
"Okay there, Remus?" Sirius asked offhandedly.
Remus glared, "Oh, yes, I'm just chipper, Sirius. I've just been blinded in my left eye."
Sirius held up his hands in defense, "Just asking."
Remus only sighed tiredly, rubbing his eye while Peter stood nervously next to Remus, backing away slowly.
The Marauders, along with every other Hogwarts student, were packing up for the summer. They'd be leaving in two days. O.W.L's had gone and past.
Remus walked back to his bed, tossing a pair of his, or at least he thought they were his, socks that he found lying on the floor, into his trunk lying open on his bed. "I'm ready for a spot of tea. Anyone else?"
"What about a spot of firewhiskey?" Sirius asked jokily.
"I'm getting closer to that." Remus replied slowly.
"Woah. My fellow Marauders, we'd best watch out for Remus here, he's becoming a firewhiskeyholic." Sirius warned slyly.
"Firewhiskeyholic isn't-" Remus started.
Sirius cut him off,"-isn't a word, I know, Re-"
"I didn't think I was that arrogant. I mena, sure, I show off every once and a while when Evans is nearby, but, come on." James cut Sirius off.
Sirius, Remus, and Peter, who was now sitting on top of his unorganized, overly full trunk, trying to get it to where he could snap it shut, looked over at James blankly.
"James, are you still rambling on about Evans? Merlin." Sirius said, shaking his head, "That girl makes you go wacky!"
James shot Sirius a look before grabbing a crumpled up and dirty shirt from under his bedside table, throwing it into his trunk without paying attention. That might have been why it landed on Peter head, instead of in his trunk.
With a squeal, Peter shook his head, ridding of the shirt. The clothes item landed in Remus' open trunk.
Remus immediately noticed the flying object, even with his supposedly blinded eye. "Hey, what's with the shirt? It's not mine, because, well, it's all-"
"Dirty and wrinkled?" Sirius asked, walking past a mumbling James, who's words sounded an awful lot like "Evans","Not Conceited", and "am I?".
Remus looked thoughtful for a moment, "Yes, I suppose so." He said, tossing the shirt in the middle of the room for anyone to claim.
"Evans was wrong, wasn't she? I mean, Snape deserved what he got at the lake." James rambled on.
"Oh, brother." Sirius muttered to himself,snapping his turnk shut.
"James, maybe you shouldn't worry about what Lily said. It seems to be making you go a bit-"
"Insane? Crazy? Psycho?" Sirius put in.
"Well, I was thinking a bit more on the word distracted, but those words could work I suppose-James, you just put a rotten banana peel in your trunk." Remus pointed out.
James sighed depressingly as he pulling the banana peel out and threw it over his shoulder into Sirius' trunk.
"Oy!" Sirius threw the banana peel at the back of James' head.
"Ow!" James hissed, rubbing the back of his head,"What was that for?" He asked turning around to look at Sirius.
"You threw the smelly thing in my trunk!"
"Oh, sorry. I was distracted." James said, slowly kicking the banana peel under his bed with his shoe.
"Leaving a wonderful aroma for when we get back next year, James?" Remus asked with a raised eyebrow as he watched him.
"Yeah."
"James, you do realize your putting a candlestick in your trunk, don't you?" Remus asked hesitantly.
"Yeah."
Remus and Sirius shared a look. "And-"
"And that your hairs on fire?" Sirius asked quickly.
"What? His hair's not on-oh, yeah, yeah, it's just blazing, James, blazing." Peter added quickly after a look from Sirius.
James nodded his non-lit hair,"Yeah."
"Do you also realize that Peter is holding your new nimbus 180?" Remus asked.
"What? I'm not holding his-" Peter stopped short from, now, Remus' look. "-Oh, yeah. This is just-just rad, I tell you, rad."
"Mmmm." James replied.
"What's with "rad", Peter?"
"What's wrong with rad? It's just a shorter word for radical. Why are you critizing rad? You don't go critizing rad, Sirius." Peter remarked indignantly.
"Woah, sorry, Pet-o. Won't happen again."
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"Well, now that everything's packed how about a nice lunch and a spot of tea-"
"-Firewhiskey-"
"-tea?" Remus finished glaring at Sirius as the Marauders began walking out the dorm later that day. They had finally finished packing after much sitting on trunks, trying to force them shut.
"I just don't understand her. What do I do wrong?" James asked, once again, not paying attention.
Sirius rolled his eyes and pushed James out the door.
Peter yawned,"You know, the trunks seem fuller than they were when we came." He pointed out.
"Maybe they are." Sirius mused.
"Or maybe you just shove everything into the trunk without folding or organizing anything." Remus also mused.
"Or maybe because your mum doesn't pack it, Pet-o." Sirius mused again.
He and, surprisingly, James laughed together at this.
-(---)-(---)-(---)-(---)-(---)-(---)-(---)-(---)-(---)-(---)-(---)-(---)-(---)-(---)-(---)-
"I still can't believe you actually attacked the house elf, Peter. He was just doing his job." Remus said in disapproval.
They had just exited the kitchens after eating a late lunch (they'd missed the lunch in the Great Hall, so had to go to the kitchens). The Marauders were now on their way back to Gryffindor Common Room.
Peter had some kind of soup. Apparently, it was somekind of very good soup, since after having five bowls of it, Peter asked for more. The house elf, Hugo, who's name puzzled Sirius ("I thought house elves names rythmed or something. You know, Inkie and Blinkie or Dorky and Porky-"),politely said that theys couldn't make anymore for Master Peter. Master Peter got upset. Which brought about the previous sentence Remus had said.
Peter huffed and tugged at his shirt collar,"I thought housee elves made anything, anytime, anywhere, and as much as you wanted."
"Well, maybe they do-except for this once. They ran out of that green chucky stuff floating around in your soup or something." James put in. James seemed have Lily Evans off his mind for now. In about 5 or 10 minutes, he'd probably zone out again, though.
"I thought they couldn't run out anything." Peter said confused.
Sirius scoffed,"What do think they are, Pet-o? Magic or something?"
"Well, actually, they are-"
"Who in their right minds checks books out for the summer, Lily?" A voice asked from around the corner.
That was all James needed before he sped up some.
Remus and Sirius grabbed hold of the back of his shirt, pulling him back."Woah, Jamesaroo, where are you going?"
"Well, Evans is around the corner and-"
"Maybe you should give Lily a break, you know. . .let her become a little less. . ." Remus trailed off, thinking of a good word to use.
"Angry? Shirty? Mad? Crazy? Feisty? A little less I'm-Going-To-Kill-You?" Sirius helped.
"A little less. . ." Remus trailed off again, ignoring Sirius all together,"Well, let her cool off a bit. You know?"
James slowed down some,"Yeah. I suppose she is a bit angry right now. . ."
Sirius snorted.
"-who have to listen to their sister go on and on about their wonderful fiance all summer, that's who. Do you know how boring it is? Do you? 'Vernon's just so nice. He's so handsome! And smart. And-wait, did I already tell you that he's going to start working in some drill company soon?' " Lily's voice was imitating her sister's just as they turned the corner and met the Marauders.
The girls stopped and Lily's eyes narrowed at the sight of James.
The Marauders also stopped, rather far back, just in case of Lily's anger.
"Potter." Lily said icily.
"Evans." James said in a would-be cold voice.
"Black, Lupin, Pettigrew, Johnson, Vance." Sirius butted in cheerfully,"Now that we all know each others last names, maybe we could move along."
"Good idea-" Alice started.
"So, Evans, what are you doing on this wonderful occasion?" James asked smoothly, a smirk on his face. He couldn't help it.
"What's the occasion?" Peter asked in the background. He was ignored.
"Oh, James. Why?" Remus asked desperately. He was also ignored.
"Getting ready for a very nice summer without you." Lily stated calmly, tugging at her backpack strap tightly.
"Oh, how can you say that? Maybe I could stop by sometime and-"
Lily dropped her bag and whipped out her wand,"Would you care for another round of dueling, Potter?"
James eyed the wand warily and daringly replied,"Well, ah, no. But, I wouldn't say no to a date to Hogsmeade."
Merlin, he was walking on broken butterbeer bottles.
Lily was red in the face now. "Potter, I-am-going-to-kill-you!" She said through gritted teeth.
James stumbled backwards, then turned and ran.
"What a pansy." Sirius stated watching James run off, Lily at his tail.
"Sirius, there's a spider on your shoulder." Emma pointed out.
"What-ah! Get it off, get it off! Get-it-off!" He exclaimed, jumping up and down, arms swinging everywhere.
Finally, the spider was off, or so Sirius thought.
"There wasn't a spider on your shoulder, Sirius." Emma said in amusement seconds after Sirius calmed down.
Sirius looked confused for a moment,"Oh, oh! I knew that! Hahaha. I was just, ah, pretending."
"Whatever you say. . .Mr. Pansy." Remus added.
"Wh-Hey!"
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"Potter, get back here!" Lily huffed and puffed, running just behind James.
"No, I think I'm fine here." James replied hastily, gaining a bit more speed. He looked behind him, not watching where hew as going. He notice Lily slowing down. He sighed inwardly with relief.
"Potter, watch out!"
"What?" He called, not hearing her, his head still turned.
"Watch out-"
Wham!
"-for the door." Lily finished as James knocked into an open classroom door.
He fell backwords, unconscious.
Lily stopped in front of him,"Potter, you prat." She muttered.
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Just then, five first years walked past the corridor, only being able to see one Lily Evans standing over a, what looked like, dead James Potter. Her wand was out and she had a calm expression on her face.
They squealed with terror and ran off to tell everyone. To tell everyone that Lily Evans had finally, after this long, killed James Potter.
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"So, your saying, he was running without looking where he was going, then ramed into the door?" Madame Pomfrey asked uncertainly, looking at a still unconscious Potter.
It had been about half an hour since James ran into the door. Lily had levitated him to the hospital wing for Madame Pomfrey to check on him.
He was now laying on hospital bed with what seemed like a faint smirk.
Some people looked innocent when they slept, but Potter, from what Lily could tell, did not. Right now he looked arrogant (When did he not?), and Lily had glared at him during class sometimes when he fell asleep. In class he looked like a troll when it slept. And he snored!
Lily jumped as the door swung open and Potter's friends, plus her own walked in calmly.
Except Sirius, who ran in with a panicked look on his face. He spotted Lily standing next to James bed and Madame Pomfrey walking back to her office. Sirius ran over and shook Lily by the shoulders. "Why Evans? Why? I know James got on your nerves and made you annoyed, but did you really have to-to. . .to-to kill him?" He choked out, looking at James.
Lily stepped back word with scrunched up eyebrows,"What in the-What are you talking about?" She asked in bewilderment. "He's not-"
"Sirius, calm down. I'm sure this was just a big misunder-" Remus was cut off.
"He's dead! Look at him! He's dead! James a smirk on his face. Wonder what he's dreaming about?" Sirius mused.
"Sirius, first of all, dead people don't dream-"
"How do you know? Are you dead, Remus? Are you?" Sirius asked, sitting down in a chair next to James.
"No, but if you would ever pay attention in class, or-oh, Merlin. I know this will be a shock to you, but, if you actually read once and a while, maybe you'd know that dead people don't dream." Remus took a breath,"And second of all, James isn't dead. Those first years can come up with some pretty crazy stories, you know. Can't you see his chest moving up and down-"
"Look! His chest not moving up and down! That means he's really. . .really-really. . ." Sirius trailed off solemnly.
"I can't believe it." Peter, who stood back watching Dead James as they spoke.
"Listen, Black, I don't know what your talking about. Potter's just-"
"Just dead, is what he is, Evans! And it's all your fault!" Sirius blamed.
Emma and Alice just stood back, confused.
"Black-"
"Lily Evans! I can't believe you would actually kill him! How could you?" A random voice called.
The group turned around, towards the entrance doors, to see a big sized group of people, angry people, glaring all at Lily.
Lily stumbled back some,"What? What do you think I killed him? James Potter isn't dead!"
A rather tall girl with black hair walked up to James' bed and pointed at him sharply,"Then how do you explain this?"
Lily gave a exsperated sigh,"He's unconscious. Potter ran into a door."
Laughs were heard.
"Yeah, like James Potter would just run into a door. He's not clumsily, Evans!" A rude voice said.
Lily peered in the direction of the voice,"Is that you, Doug? Don't I tutor you?"
Doug slouched down as people around him move away from him in disgust. As if associating with Lily Evans after she supposedly killed James Potter was disgusting.
Lily turned to Emma and Alice,"You two believe me, don't you?"
Emma and Alice looked startled. They looked anywhere, but Lily,"Well. . ."
"What?" Lily asked,"My best friends don't even believe me? I might not like Potter, but I would never murder, for Merlin's sake." Lily exclaimed.
The crowd around her grew and they came closer.
Lily looked around desperately spotting Remus,"Remus! You believe, don't you? Of course, you do. Your smart!" She said hastily grabbing Remus arm and pulling him back with her.
He's eyes widened,"Uh. . ."
"Look, Evans has a hostage!" Someone called. Angry shouts were heard.
Lily gasped,"I don't have a hostage, Remus actually believes me, unlike you idiots!"
Remus winced,"Lily, I really don't think calling them idiots will help. In fact, I think it'll only make it wor-"
"Tell them I didn't kill Potter, actually tell them that Potter isn't even dead." Lily hissed in Remus' ear.
Remus groaned,"Why me?"
"Because your the only one who'll believe me."
"Fine, fine." Remus cleared his throat and squared his shoulders, getting ready for his speech. Slowly, he cracked his knuckles and breathed in. . .out. . .in. . .out. . .in. . .out-
"Before we graduate from Hogwarts would be nice, Remus!" Lily said, pulling out her wand and pointing it at the crowd. The tow were now against the wall, surrounded.
"Right." Remus muttered confidently, then, as he saw the huge crowd grew even more, as did the shouts, Remus' shoulder sagged and he didn't look as confident. He turned slightly to Lily,"Er. . ."
"What now? Need to crack your toes or something?" Lily asked sarcastically.
Remus chuckled weakly,"Well, you see, I, ah, I'm not good with big crowds, Lily-"
"Now, Remus!" Lily yelled, pushing him forward a bit.
Remus stood stock still, staring at the crowd, while trying to duck hexes aimed for Lily, who was just behind him. "Hello. Today we are here to, um, to try to, er-"
"Riot?" A voice in the crowd helped.
"Ah, yes. Thank you. We-you, actually, are here to riot because-because, er, because you think Lily Evans murdered James Potter, right?"
The crowd agreed.
"Well, uh,well, she didn't, so if you could just-" Remus' voice was drowned out now from all the shouting of the riot.
Lily, suddenly, after ducking a yellow hex, came up with an idea. . .
She grabbed Remus and held, wand against his neck.
Remus yelped in suprise.
"Remus, just bare with me here. Pretend like your, er, your my hostage." Lily explained.
"How?"
Lily sighed tiredly,"Remus, your smart, figure it out!" She tightened her grip on his neck,"I have a wand! A wand on Remus' neck. . .and-and I'm not afraid to use it!" She said lamely.
"Oh, bravo, Lily." Remus called sarcastically.
"Just be a hostage, will you, and mind your own business!" Lily hissed.
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Madame Pomfrey sang loudly along with the Wizarding Wireless Network.
"Oh, come and stir my cauldron,
And if you do it right,
I'll boil you up some hot strong love
To keep you warm tonight"
She turned the volume up as she began organizing her desk. It had been a bit cluttered for weeks now.
"Oh, my poor heart, where has it gone?
It's left me-"
"Madame Pomfrey!" A voice faintly called over the music.
"Madame Pomfrey, please! Help me-bloody-ah!"
"-for a spell. . ."
Madame Pomfrey stopped for a moment, hand holding a picture of some famous, good looking quidditch player, who winked and waved every five seconds. "Did I just hear something? No." She said, shaking her head. "No." Madame Pomfrey sat the picture down off to one corner and she sighed and gazed at it while she continued singing along with the song.
". . .and now you've torn it quite apart
I'll thank you to give back my heart!"
Madame Pomfrey sighed dreamily,"Oh, Herbert. . ." She said to the roguish quidditch player. "Your so. . .so dreamy."
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While Madame Pomfrey was daydreaming/cleaning her cluttered desk, Lily was still pretending to hold Remus hostage. It wasn't helping much though.
"Where is Madame Pomfrey!" Lily asked in frustration. Her grip on Remus' neck accidently, out of anger.
He choked some,"Er, Lily, could you loosen up on my neck a bit. I'd like to breathe air again soon."
"Oh, I'm sorry, Remus!" Lily said, giving him the air he wanted.
"Oh, no problem." he said offhandly. "Hex coming from the left. Duck."
"Right, thanks!" Lily said, ducking just as a hex from the left came flying at her, just like Remus said.
"No problem-o." Remus said offhandly.
Lily duck again, brow furrowed,"Did you just say, "problem-o"?"
Remus chuckled sheepishly, even though they were surrounded by a bunch of revenge hungry people, hexs coming from all directions,"Well, I have lived with Sirius and James and Peter for the past five years. It's not my fault if I use inproper grammar."
"Remus, you just said, "inproper", too. . .get away from me! I've already said that I've got a wand and I'm not afraid to use it!" Lily finished lamely again, poking a dazed Remus in the neck.
Remus was shocked. He did use inproper-no! Improper! That's what he meant! Improper grammar. Oh, James, Peter, and Sirius,especially Sirius, since he has the worst grammar around, were going to pay!
"They-will-pay!" He yelled.
Everyone close to him, including Lily was momentarily shocked at Remus' outburst.
They stopped moving and silence filled the air.
Remus ducked his head, embarrassed, and nudged Lily arm to give it another prode in his neck to show he was still a so-called hostage of Lily.
Chaos began again.
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About 10 minutes later, everything went silent again. And not because Remus had another outburst.
No, because a groggy, sleepy looking James Potter was walking through the crowd towards Lily and Remus.
The crowd moved out of his way in a daze.
He raised an eyebrow at them.
When he reached Lily and Lily's hostage, Remus, he stood in front of them, head tilted to the side.
"What's this all about? Why do you have your wand on Remus, Evans? What's with all the people? Is it a party?" He asked cluelessly.
Lily hastily let go of Remus, letting him stand steady after 20 minutes of holding his neck. He rubbed it, groaning,"I have a crick in my neck now."
"Well-?"
Sirius cut James off,"James. . .your-your alive!" He said jogging up to the front and clapping him on the back.
James looked at him funny,"Well, of course, I am. What else would I be?"
Sirius shifted nervously and glanced at Remus then looked at Lily.
She shifted her weight to one leg looking at him with a 'Well? Are you going to admit your an idiot?' type of look.
"Uh, well, there was this tiny misunderstanding, you see. . ." He started, chuckling nervously.
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A/N: LoL, yes, that was very tiny, Sirius. LoL. I dunno where that came from. Just thought of it and started writing. It seems random, doesn't it? It's kind of a filler. The next chapter will be the last for 5th year. I'm not sure if I'll do chapters over their summers or not.
Anyone recognized the song Madame Pince was singing along with the WWN? LoL, it's from the HBP. Remember? The one Molly Weasley was singing. I can't think up a song, so I just used that one. It's not mine. I am disclaiming entirely.
Oh, and poor Remus! He's using inproper grammar! LoL.