I'm not going to bother apologising for how long it took me to update, because everyone who started reading this story has now died of old age. Just an enormous thank you to everyone who reviewed on the last chapter. You make me so Harry, you're the reason I carry Ron. Hermione good at these jokes? No? no. Sorry.

I'll shut my face now and let you read.

Secrets

Tonks very slowly but surely began to wake from her sleep. Her head was pounding, her arm was throbbing painfully and every muscle in her body ached horribly. And then she remembered. Every horrific detail of the night before hit her with the force of a punch to the stomach. She couldn't open her eyes. She didn't want to accept it as reality. Not yet. As she lay there, regaining her senses, she began hear a constant tapping sound.

Tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap… She wrinkled her nose in annoyance and she felt the dried blood on her face. She daren't open her eyes though. Not yet. Tonks stirred slightly, really feeling the effect of spending the night on her kitchen floor.

That was odd… Her head was resting on something soft; it felt like a coat or a jacket, the buttons pressed painfully against her cheek. She was also aware of something thin covering her; she moved again, it moved with her. Then the tapping stopped.

She opened her eyes.

'I'll kill him' Sirius said darkly. His arms were folded across his chest, his feet were thrown up onto the table and his eyes were narrowed as he looked at his best friend across the empty kitchen table with concern.

'I don't think that'll be necessary, Sirius' Remus replied coolly as he shovelled cereal into his mouth. He was starving. 'I mean he doesn't actually have to make it for me'

Sirius let out a growl that sent a horrible shudder down Remus' spine. 'Dumbledore clearly told him to make you Wolfsbane every month. This is about the other day' Sirius said, his voice rose slightly 'I know it is!'

'Calm down Sirius' Said Lupin as he put down his spoon and got up to refill his bowl 'It's not full moon anymore. It doesn't matter'

'Just because he doesn't like you' Sirius ignored him and continued 'That's no excuse! It would have taken him a few minutes to make it. That little…' Sirius called Snape something too rude to repeat and then lowered his voice a little 'And I know… how bad full moon is for you without it, Remus. You know I do.'

Lupin looked over his shoulder at his friend as he tipped cereal into his bowl. 'Look at me, Sirius, I'm fine' He smiled at him. 'Honestly'

Sirius did look at him, hard. And although he still had that worn down, tired look that he always had after full moon, he looked younger, healthier…happier. 'Yeah you do look fine' Sirius said curiously. Lupin looked better than he had since… an idea struck him. 'And if I didn't know any better,' Sirius continued 'I'd say you'd found yourself a lady friend'

Remus turned his back on Sirius again as he poured milk into his bowl. 'Yeah' He said before adding 'Something like that'

Sirius let out a bellowing, gleeful laugh. 'Well go on!' He said impatiently, sitting up and grinning. He couldn't remember the last time Lupin had got himself a girlfriend. 'What's she like?'

Lupin put down the milk bottle and while his back was still to Sirius, he allowed the smile he had been suppressing all morning to finally stretch across his face.

'Perfect'

At first, the light painfully stung her eyes and everything in her view was a hopeless blur. After a little while she began to see clearer. She saw the blood, still smeared all over the floor and as her eyesight began to focus she spotted something that made her jump. Sharply in focus and right in the centre of her vision was the sole of a shoe. Tonks blinked hard and then gasped at the sudden sight of the man wearing it.

'Are you going to explain, or do I have to guess?'

Slasior Zain was sat on Tonks' kitchen floor, leaning against the cabinet and looking right at her. His shirt was covered in her blood, one hand was on the floor, tapping on the tiles with his fingers and clasped in the other, was Beth's Letter. Tonks said nothing and instead just stared at him in shock.

'Well?' He said impatiently.

Tonks tried to speak, but she couldn't, her mouth was too dry. 'Here' Zain thrust a glass at her; it was filled with a revolting looking black potion. She looked at him in disgust. 'Drink it' He said impatiently 'Go on. It'll help the pain too'

She pushed off the cloak that was covering her and took it from him with a trembling hand. Tonks downed the whole thing in one. It tasted horrific. She then put the glass down with a thud and said exactly what she was thinking.

'What - what are you doing here? Get out of my flat!'

'Charming' He responded dryly while resolutely not moving a muscle. 'You're welcome for, you know, saving your life and whatnot'

'I was fine' she said coolly. She didn't feel comfortable being this vulnerable around him. She sat up groggily and noticed that her arm had been tightly bound in a white bandage.

'Yeah, that's what I thought when I found you bleeding to death on your kitchen floor in the middle of the night.' His eyes were cold and hard. 'What happened?'

Tonks ignored him. 'What, so you just waltz into other peoples home's whenever you feel li-'

'The door was open.'

'And what made you think I neede-'

'The trail of your blood on the floor' He cut in again, darkly. 'What happened?'

'What were you doing outside my flat door' she shot back.

'When you left the office in such a hurry last night, you took my bag with you, not your one'

'Oh' Tonks said, feeling a little embarrassed. There was a silence. Zain hoisted himself up, picked up his jacket that had been folded under her head and watched Tonks struggle to her feet. He didn't help her, he just stared, his eyes narrowed.

'The werewolf' He said darkly 'Lupin attacked you, didn't he?'

Tonks felt her heart plummet in fear. 'No!' She said desperately before realising that there was no point in lying. 'No. Zain, listen.' She said quickly, panic was quickly spreading throughout her whole body. 'It was my fault. It was me. I went there and it was full moon and he scratched me and…'

'Scratched?' He scoffed 'Nymphadora, that's not a fucking scratch. Moody would…'

'No!' She said even more desperately than before. He looked at her in casual surprise 'Zain, please' She was begging him now.

'Look, you're just lucky I didn't take you to Mungo's. I really think it's something the Order…'

'PLEASE! Nobody can know. You can't tell anyone. Please. Promise you won't tell anyone. Zain…'

'Alright' He said, raising an eyebrow. 'Keep your knickers on' He picked up his bag and slung it over his shoulder. 'It's not like I actually care' It was then that Tonks spotted Beth's letter in his grasp.

'What's…' Both her voice and her face darkened like thunder 'WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH THAT?' She went to snatch it back off him, he moved it out of her reach.

'Tetchy' He said, one eyebrow cocked up in curiosity. Tonks grabbed it out of his hand and shoved it back into the drawer that it had been living in. 'Did you read it?' She demanded.

'Yes' He replied immediately.

'Get out' She said, her voice trembling in anger, fear and emotion from the night before. 'You keep quiet and you get the hell out.'

Zain picked up his cloak off the floor. 'Do me a favour and don't get killed by the Werewolf. I can't have half of my team missing and the other half dead. There's only so much paperwork I can deal with.'

'Is that why you stayed the whole night then?' She asked harshly before adding, 'and we're not your team'

'Don't flatter yourself Nymphadora' He was half way to the door before he turned round. 'Shall we not gallivant with werewolves at the full moon in the future? And also, steady on… he's twice your fucking age' Then with one last contemptuous glance he left, slamming the door shut behind him. Tonks sank into an armchair, and for the second time in two days, did something very, very unlike her usual self. Bringing her knees to her chest, she began to cry, uncontrollably into her semi-bandaged arms.

Sirius was handing out drinks as Order members began to arrive. It was one of the big meetings tonight, one of those juicy ones with lots of arguments and strategy, along with plenty of Umbridge bashing. By the sounds of it, she was going down a real treat at Hogwarts. For some reason, Sirius had a fleeting mental image of Fred and George's mischievous faces. He grinned widely, what he wouldn't give to watch one of their Defence Against the Dark Arts lessons. Those two could take down the Ministry of magic on their own.

'Moony?' Sirius called down the table at Lupin, to ask him what he wanted.

'Use your brain' He called back. Sirius chuckled and threw him a Butterbeer. Molly sighed at Sirius, watching him throw the drink with an exasperated expression. Remus summoned the bottle as it flew, catching it neatly in his right hand. Once everyone that had already arrived was supplied with drinks, apart from Snape, Sirius sat down. He had made the point of telling Snape loudly that he would get him a drink but unfortunately he was far too busy with Order work to do so. Remus looked down quickly as an appreciative smile flickered across his face.

It was then that Tonks arrived late; dressed typically casually in her tight, black jeans and lilac T-shirt with 'The Weird Sisters' printed across the front. Lupin noticed that the whole lower part of her left arm was wrapped in a white bandage. Her dark eyes were sparkling as ever and her hair was a deep strawberry red. It fell in loose waves around her face and her lips were a matching shade. She made her entrance by tripping into the room over a loose floorboard and cursing, she caught Lupin's eye and her cheeks quickly joined both her hair and lips in colour. Lupin had to hide his smile again as she immediately sat down next to him.

Her fear and her dread and her sorrow and her pain that she had been feeling that day, all evaporated at once. He was not the wolf that attacked her, he never was and he would never be. The weight of the world was lifted from her shoulders and all it took was a mere flicker of a smile.

His heart began to speed up and he did all he could to remain looking casual. This was going to be difficult. Sirius threw her a drink, which she missed but Remus caught and handed to her with a smile. Sirius watched his best friend and his cousin carefully for a moment, but Dumbledore cut off his train of thought as the meeting began.

It was intense tonight. The main topic of conversation was Bellatrix Lestrange. After the mass breakout the year before, all of the death eaters were causing trouble. But she was by far the worst. The most sickening of all news was that Voldemort had started speculating about trying to break into Hogwarts.

The mere thought of this made Tonks feel physically sick, not only because it had been her home for seven years, but because she was one of two people who knew how to do it. Herself and of course, Dumbledore. You see, contrary to popular belief (Including the contents of 'Hogwarts: A History') there was a way to get past the many protective spells and enchantments that protected the castle. There was a password. Just one word that could stand between a large group of bloodthirsty Death Eaters and the School. Dumbledore had entrusted her with this password. He knew that it was a possibility that he would be driven out of Hogwarts. And on the basis that, if there was an emergency and Harry needed to be kept safe; Dumbledore wanted somebody to be able to get to him before Umbridge. Somebody that Harry knew, liked, and trusted. It couldn't be Sirius, because he couldn't leave the house. It couldn't be Lupin because there are certain times that he would be unavailable. It couldn't be Snape. Harry hated Snape. So Tonks was trusted with the password. The top secret, destroy after reading, nobody can ever know on pain of death password.

Tonks hated responsibility.

She smiled as she remembered the day she got that letter from Dumbledore. Remus had taken it to her flat. He'd left a note on top. She also knew that he'd looked at her drawings. She would have at least expected him to at least try and put them back in the same place. She smiled again.

It was then that she felt a piece of parchment slide under her fingers. She saw Lupin's hand leave it there and then return under the table. She looked up at his face, but he was staring innocently and in apparent fascination at Kingsley, who was speaking. Tonks looked down.

The words, Still on for tomorrow night? Had been scrawled in his messy handwriting. She immediately scribbled a reply.

Why, of course.

She felt him nudge her foot with his a few seconds later and she looked down once more.

Where do you want to go?

Surprise me.

Lupin smiled. She would regret that.

How about we go dancing?

No!

Why not?

I can't dance.

I know, you've told me. But you said I could choose.

I said you could surprise me, not traumatise me.

Lupin suppressed a laugh.

I'm sure you're dancing isn't that bad ,Dora.

Ha. I guess you'll find out.

I guess I will. What happened to your arm?

She froze. Her heart began to pound furiously. She wrote her reply very carefully, thanking Merlin that he hadn't asked her face to face.

Burnt it. Think I'll leave the cooking to Molly and The Three Broomsticks from now on.

She saw him smile out of the corner of her eye and she relaxed. He believed her.

Mad-eye is staring at me.

Lupin wasn't wrong there. Moody's wizened and unsettling eyes had both been fixed on Lupin for the last minute or so. Tonks suddenly felt guilty, because she knew why May-eye was angry. They should be paying attention, not sending notes. Constant vigilance and all that. She scrawled her final reply.

Yes. Perhaps, less note making and more note taking.

His lack of reply told her that he agreed. It didn't stop Mad-eye from staring at him however. As the meeting drew to a close, Sirius was getting more and more frustrated. Lupin felt for his friend, he knew what it was like, not being able to work because nobody trusts you. At the end of the meeting, Sirius skulked past him upstairs, muttering something about 'The most noble and ancient house of twat'

Lupin was about to leave behind Kingsley when he felt a hand grip his shoulder and pull him into a separate room. It was a study, lined with dusty bookshelves which were teaming with huge books about the dark arts. Moody's ragged face was just about visible in the dim light.

'A word, Remus.'

Slasior Zain walked quickly through the heavy rain, his face bowed downwards. He ran up the path towards his front door and had just made it inside before there was a knock on it. He took a deep breath, grasped the brass handle and opened it once more. Rookwood stood in the doorframe, in all his unpleasantness. A flash of well-timed lightning, illuminated his frame. He chuckled a thick, chilling laugh. Something was exciting him.

'So, Zain, where is she? Where's the girl?' His eyes were alight with an unsettling fire.

Slasior kept his face stony, his voice steady and his features unremittingly impassive. He replied after just a moment's silence.

'She's dead. I killed her.'

If it wasn't for the raging storm, the wind and the rain, Rookwood might have heard a noise coming from the room above.

A frightened little thump that would have told him Zain was a liar.

Having to go back to work after an evening Order meeting was usually pretty high on Tonk's list of things she hated more than anything on earth. But tonight she didn't mind that much. She was too happy. She had a date with Remus Lupin! The words sounded silly in her head, as if they couldn't possibly be true. She was so cheerful; she hadn't even complained when she was given no night surveillance to do and simply had to finish off the department reports for that month.

There was only one thing however, that could ruin her almost deliriously happy disposition. Zain. She didn't want to see him. Not after last night. She didn't want to think about what had happened, Tonks touched her arm gently. He had saved her life and because of it, she hated him now even more than she had before. She didn't want to owe Slasior Zain anything. And now she owed him everything.

A Ministry memo zoomed around her head and landed neatly on her desk. She opened it, without paying much attention until she saw that it was from Kingsley and by the look of it, written in a hurry. It was composed of four short sentences.

Found out why Beth was under surveillance. Zain told them to watch her. Told Dumbledore, he still trusts him. I don't.

It was at this moment she heard somebody coming in; Tonks incinerated the message with a quick flick of her wrist and brushed the ash off her desktop, onto the floor. It was Zain. He sat down at his desk without looking at her. She studied him briefly. His eyes looked tired, even his hair wasn't as inhumanly neat as it usually was. A few minutes passed in excruciating silence before Tonks decided that she couldn't just ignore him. She looked at him quickly.

She thought for a second before deciding to say it. 'Thank you for saving my life, Zain.'

He didn't look up, but his eyes narrowed. She saw something flash in his expression, anger, hatred. He sighed, as if a reply was going to be of great effort to him.

'Anytime' He replied coolly.

His answer had still been rude and his manner had still been arrogant. But it occurred to Tonks that it was probably the nicest thing he had ever said to her. Another thought crossed her mind. He hadn't told anyone, he'd kept his word.

Tonks looked down and realised that she had made an accidental ink splodge on the report she was writing. As she cleaned it up, she wondered. She wasn't entirely sure that agreed with Kingsley. She might just trust Slasior Zain after all.

There we are :) Please let me know what you think! A huuuuge thank you to ThisLoveHasNoCeiling for being my Beta and just generally amazing. Thanks to everyone who reads/reviews/alerts/favourites... you are the bestest! Take care, and I'll see you for Tonks and Lupin's first date ;)