2

Sarah POV

I went downstairs only when I had to. My parents had watched me go to Dueling Classes yesterday with blank faces, and when I returned, they were sleeping. Moody had questioned me thoroughly when I got to classes, and his concern was refreshing; it made me feel much better. Coming home was like a slap to the face. Most of my time was spent in my room, staring at books, not really reading them. I'd go to Dueling, tell Moody I felt fine, and then I'd duel like I was a machine. I felt no joy in doing it anymore, no frustration or determination when I'd lose, and no satisfaction when I won. I'd read my friends letters, and I'd write back- but I purposely wrote overly cheerful letters that I knew didn't fool them. Harry hadn't felt anything, and he eventually stopped asking me if I'd had any moments when I kept turning him down. I hated the time when I was awake, but I started to loathe sleep- and I avoided doing so as much as possible. My parents were waking me up every other night complaining about my nightmares. According to them, I'd scream, cry, or laugh almost every night. I knew I was eating less, but I didn't have the energy to correct myself. So I sat in my room, staring at the opposite wall, drowning on nothing. Then I was fighting off sleep again, watching the shadows change on the walls, but I knew I'd have to give in eventually. My lids were getting lower no matter how I fought against them…

I was laughing, elated. He had been brought into the ranks, despite Cissy's reluctance, and now, with her son as a Death Eater, we'd take over Hogwarts, murder Potter and Dumbledore, and restore the world to our order. My cackling got louder, a bit more crazed, as my Dark Mark burned, not for me to be summoned, but with the Dark Lord's pleasure, something I could live off of, it was so intoxicating.

Now all I had to do was hunt down the student I'd marked. She would fit perfectly into the Dark Lord's plans; she would be helpless to resist…

"ENOUGH!" A voice bellowed, and something hard hit my face, jerking me awake with a scream. The room was light, even though the windows showed it was night. Mother was cowering the doorway while Father stood over me, looking mortified. I sat up quickly and he took a step back. The inside of my left wrist burned strongly, and my headache was back, synchronized with the frantic pounding of my heart. The side of my face stung where Father had struck it. "What is this? Is it the devil?" Father demanded, his voice terrible.

"N-No, it's not the d-devil," I heard myself stammer, trying to discreetly wrap my hand around the mark, my cold skin soothing the burning for only moments.

"I don't believe you. We can see how you're wasting away under his presence, the deformities on your hands are only proof!" Father roared.

"What deformities?" I asked, looking down, but Father snatched my hands before I could look. Then he pointed out I must not tell lies.

"The Devil has bound your tongue with his spirit, hasn't he? And then there's this- he wrestled my left hand over, revealing the skull, which seemed to pulse under my eyes with my headache and heart, making me feel colder than ever. Father jerked away, apparently feeling the change in temperature, trembling with rage.

"I am not possessed, Father." I worked to sound calm. He'd assumed that I was the Devil's child before, and the last time he went mad. I didn't want that to happen again.

"You were laughing tonight, in your sleep, like an insane old crone! You've been crying, screaming, shouting- you name it! Sometimes you even switch languages, and I know that you are doing the devil's work! Ever since we sent you to that school." He sneered the word, but I felt no anger towards him, only at myself for what I'd allowed to happen.

"Listen to me. I'm not possessed. You should not be concerned." I said harshly, whipping back the covers and getting out of bed. Father took another step back, joining Mother in the doorway. Self hatred was filling me to the brim- I couldn't even maintain my integrity anymore. "Now, please leave." At my request, Mother quickly pulled Father away and shut the door, too frightened to argue with me. Only when they'd left did I feel myself shivering, quaking with fright. The Death Eaters had someone on their side now, someone charged with the task of killing Harry and Dumbledore. But who, where, and when? And how did Bellatrix think I could be involved? "Paper," I murmured to myself, turning on the spot, suddenly frantic for parchment. I had to write to Harry about this. I hadn't written to him in awhile, and I knew I was long overdue on writing back to him and everyone else. I threw myself around the room, looking for a quill until I finally found one. Sitting heavily at the desk, I began to write, my trembling hand marring my perfect cursive.

Harry,

I just had a dream- a follow up to the one dream I had earlier, you remember? That woman's son is a Death Eaterr know-now- and his mission is to kill you and Dummbledore. I don't know when or where, or who is goinng to do it, but she was laughing, and so was I, laughing, cackiling, and I didn't know I was doing it until my parents woke me up. I- They think I'm ppossesed, and I don't know if I am or nott. But Bellatrix thought I could-don't worry.

Sarah

I couldn't think, I couldn't finish the letter, couldn't fix my mistakes. My hands were shaking too hard, and I my mind was too disorganized to finish the thoughts. "Joe," I croaked, and he flew over, awoken by my apparent crazy laughter. "I k-know it's late, but take this to H-Harry, alright? Harry." I instructed, and he ruffled his wings, looking at me almost with concern, or maybe I was crazy after all. He took off without having to be asked, and vanished quickly into the blackness. Out of energy now, I slowly crossed the room and curled up into a ball on my bed, shaking, trying to calm down. Despite trying to fight it, hysteria kept in a ball for a long time until my body made me fall asleep again…

"Cissy, wait!" I called, scrambling down a street. Slightly lopsided brick houses lined the road, and I could barely see Cissy in their shadows, running like a fool. I caught up to her and held her arm to keep her still. "Cissy, the Dark Lord has forbidden you to speak of it! You can't trust him!"

"Let me go, Bella." Cissy said in a low voice, pulled herself free, and kept on, turning down the streets, ignoring me behind her until she pulled up to his house. She knocked hurriedly. After a moment, the door opened-

"Yes, Father, please come in," Mother's voice downstairs jerked me out of sleep. Disoriented, I felt moisture on my face and a kink in my back. I was still curled in a ball on my bed, and my chest felt tight- my eyes burning. I had been crying, sobbing, and I was out of breath now. The dream seemed fainter as the voices downstairs got louder.

"She's been crying for the past half hour, and I couldn't wake her- she's been sleeping for days. She's also been screaming, laughing, chanting-" Mother broke off as an unfamiliar voice talked over her.

"Where is her room?" A gentle voice asked. Footsteps headed for my room, and I hurriedly shoved spell books and magical artifacts out of sight, just stuffing Joe's cage under the bed as my door creaked open. A priest was in the doorway, looking cautious, Mother hovering anxiously behind him. I knew that I usually would have laughed at this, but I couldn't feel. "Sarah?" The priest asked, stepping into the room.

"C-can I help you, Father?" I asked, hastily wiping tears off my face, trying to seem composed. Inside, I felt something roar with laughter, as if they were amused with the presence of the priest. Before I could reflect on it, the priest spoke.

"That depends," the man said carefully. "Do you know the day? The time? Where you are?" He asked.

"Today is J-July twenty fifth. It's Wednesday." I glanced at my clock. "It's 2 in the afternoon, and I'm in my house." I felt my stomach dropped as I looked at the date on my clock. It wasn't even July anymore; it was August, August first. I had missed classes for today. Frowning, I realized that the last time I'd known what day it was had been over a weeks ago. Had I been going to classes?

"That's fine. Now, have you felt a presence, Sarah? Do you feel the devil in you? Have you seen him?" The priest asked, hiding his reaction to my incorrect assumption of the date very well. I felt my eyes flash with inexplicable anger at his idea that I was possessed. He took a step back.

"This is foolishness. I have not been possessed by the Devil, what is this, the Salem Witch Trials? My emotions have just gotten the better of me. I assure you, I am my own person. Your services are not required. You should not be concerned." I repeated the phrase I had been using all summer to get my parents to back off. The priest turned around and left, motioning Mother after him. As soon as they were gone, I shut the door then looked to the window. Sure enough, Joe, Hedwig, and Ron's tiny owl flitted back into view, along with another owl, one I didn't recognize. I silently opened the window and they landed on my desk in a line, lifting their legs. I took Joe's first, force of habit, and opened it.

Sarah,

You need to write to Dumbledore. I'm not sure exactly what's going on, but it's out of my hands. If you don't, I will.

Harry

His handwriting was fast and furious, as if he'd been in a rush. I could picture him sending it quickly and waiting impatiently for a reply, and when he didn't get one, he probably had gotten even more worried. I crumpled the letter, throwing it in my trash, taking Hedwig's letter.

Sarah,

No one's heard from you. Have you written to Dumbledore? You're starting to scare us. If you don't reply to this, Ron's going to write you; we'll be out of owls. We've asked Mr. Weasley to talk to Moody, but you haven't been showing up to classes. Please write back.

Harry

I threw that one away too, and took the letter from Ron's excited little owl and unrolled it.

Sarah

What the bloody hell is going on? You've got us all really worried, Dad's talked to Moody- and they'll be writing Dumbledore. No one's checked on you in awhile, and we know how you get when you're alone, that thing takes you over. Write back or Hermione's head just might explode from worry.

Ron

I threw his away too, robotically reaching for the unfamiliar owl.

Ms. Wimkil,

You've neglected to attend Dueling for the past three weeks. If you are absent for the next meeting, we will have to suspend your position and you will not receive a refund.

Sincerely,

Dueling for Minors, M.O.M.

I forcefully threw away the letter from the Ministry, suddenly full of rage. First my parents call back a priest to see if I need an exorcism, then this? "Get. Go on!" I shouted at the owls waiting for my reply. Only the Ministry owl flew away, but Hedwig and Pig stubbornly remained. "Here," I snarled, ripping a book end out of a Magical Beasts and Where to Find Them at a weird angle.

I'm fine.

Was all I scrawled, before slamming the quill down and shoving the paper in the bird's general direction. When they took off, I shut the window with a crash, my chest heaving with anger. Rage was making my blood sing; I was seeing red. All of these filthy mudbloods and traitors were bothering me, how dare they? I stormed out of my room and down the steps. My parents were talking in the kitchen, looking worried, and leapt out of their seats when they saw me. "Why did you call a priest? Do you think I'm demented, not perfect enough to have come from you!" I roared, hands in fists.

"Sarah, you're sick. We've called a doctor." Father said stiffly, and I heard myself laugh bitterly, with just a hint of craziness to it.

"I don't need a doctor. He can't do jack shit for me." I snarled, suddenly wishing I had my wand. My parents really weren't that important to anyone, I should kill them on the spot for acting like I wasn't pure. Bastards.

"Sarah, you're ill. We know that you don't mean to say such things. We'll make sure that you won't have to go back to that school. That's obviously what's afflicting you." Mother said sadly, and I picked up a vase on the counter next to me and threw it at the fridge, where it exploded into thousands of tiny pieces, making Mother shriek and Father jerk, as if he was going to approach me but thought better of it. I could feel my whole frame vibrating with anger.

"I have to go back to Hogwarts. Don't call anyone here to help me, Muggles can't. There's nothing you can do but wait until I don't have to mess up your lives anymore." I spat before charging back up into my room, slamming the door so hard, it rattled on its hinges…

OoOoOoO

Slowly, I turned my head away from the wall to look at my clock. It was 12:30. I had stayed up all night, refusing to sleep, determined to go to classes again. They started at 1, and I had to get there on the Underground, so I'd need to leave now. Methodically, I changed clothes, grabbed my wand and left the house without saying a word. The ride on the Underground was short, and before I knew it, I was flushing myself into the Ministry, heading for the highest floor. As I stepped out of the lift, I could hear that class was just about to start, so I slipped inside. The room was the same, large, empty, with light brown wooden floors and white walls. Two large magical windows showed that it was sunny outside. "Glad you could join us!" An unfamiliar teacher smiled at me, and I just looked away, feeling like something was wrong. Someone was supposed to be here, but who? "Ok guys, divide into pairs, and let's get dueling!" The teacher called enthusiastically, and I saw her sidle off and cast a Patronus message to someone, instantly losing her sunny demeanor.

"Hey, Wimkil. Nice to see you weren't too chicken to come back." A voice taunted me, and I turned. This stupid kid, Nick, I thought his name was, had been after me since the beginning. "Wanna duel, or are you too scared?" He mocked. He was a seventh year this year, and a Hufflepuff, which meant he wasn't too bright.

"Fine," I heard myself say softly, and I walked the seven paces back and raised my wand. He started the duel, and for awhile, I simply held him at bay, playing him, tiring him out.

"Is that the best you can do?" He panted a laugh, and I retaliated sharply, deep hatred sparking from his comment. If he thought he could even compete with me, someone pure, he was wrong. I drew my wand around, sending spells at him; his filthy blood daring to challenge me. With three huge slashes with my wand, I beat him down to his knees, and then disarmed him with a harsh flick of my wand, a roaring filling my ears as I raised my wand, ready to end his miserable life-

"Expelliarmus!" A voice growled, and my wand flew out of my hand. I whirled on the spot, full of fury, and found Moody. My eyes met his, and that's when it all fell into place, all of my anger vanished. The world flickered for a second as I came back to myself, and any color in my face drained. What was happening to me? What had I done? I whirled back around to see Nick cowering on the floor, his eyes full of fear. The rest of the class was standing around in shock, and the person I finally recognized as the student teacher looked horrified. Then I was running, dashing out of the hall, not caring that I didn't have my wand, I just had to get away. Facts were falling into place, filling strange gaps in my memory. I had known that Marchbanks wasn't teaching it this year due to a surprise illness, and that there was a student teacher. I was supposed to have known that Moody would be there everyday to see if I was being possessed. The letters and owls I had been getting were from my poor friends who probably thought I had fallen off the face of the earth- and it felt like I had, things had happened that I remembered but didn't remember doing- I tripped running down the hallway to the lift and caught myself on the wall then slid down it, hugging my knees, feeling tears streaming down my face. I was shuddering, scared that I had lost myself that much without even realizing it. I put my head down, trying to stifle sobs. "Sarah," Moody's voice growled, and I lifted my head to see him standing a few feet away, his magical eye whizzing over me. "Let me see the mark," he said, and all I had to do was hold out my arm. I had neglected myself so badly that I hadn't even covered it up. His eye raked over it, then over me again.

"This whole summer," I croaked, "I didn't even feel it, didn't even know." I buried my face back into my knees.

"It's alright now, Sarah. Stand up now, there you go." Moody lifted me by the scruff and put me back on my feet. "Now, listen. Tell me your address, we will get your things. You need to speak with Dumbledore- I'll take you to him. Come on, now. Here," he held my wand out to me, but I took a step back, shaking my head.

"I was doing magic I d-didn't even know, Dark Magic. I can't. I c-can't risk it. No." I stammered, and Moody slid my wand into his pocket.

"Come on then, your address." He pushed calmly, but his eye didn't stop whizzing over me. I spit it out as he escorted me out of the Ministry, and he Apparated me back home. I went in without knocking and started upstairs, Moody clunking behind me, when Father and Mother appeared at the top of the stairs.

"Mother, Father, I'm l-leaving." I said lifelessly, even when I had to step back as they came down the stairs.

"You aren't going anywhere with that man. We're taking you to the hospital." Father said, trying to seem impressive, but his uncertainty gave him away.

"I've told you, they c-can't help me. Look," I extended my wrist at them, letting see the mark again. It was darker than usual, a horrid mark on my skin. "This is the mark of a curse, alright? I've been cursed. Professor M-Moody is taking me back to the wizarding world to try to relieve its affects. I'm leaving."