Oh my gosh thank you so much for the response to the last chapter! I was hoping for maybe a couple alerts and a few reviews, but you guys have been so amazing! I woke up in the morning to see my inbox with 50 new messages, and it absolutely made my day! Thank you guys so, so much! Anyways, here is the next chapter, I hope you like it! Drop me your thoughts, I always love to hear how it is, positive and negative. Enjoy!
Timeline: Just to clear some stuff that was asked about up, this story is set mid season five. Castle and Beckett have been together since "Always". All the current events of season five have happened, but I'm not sure if events past the most current episode will be referenced. I'll let you know if they are. If you have anymore questions about that or anything else just send me a PM and I'll get it cleared up for you! Thanks!
Disclaimer: I do not own Castle, or anything associated with it, though I so wish I did.
"Well," Castle said from his place next to Beckett, where he stood with a look of confusion. "Beckett, you have a twin."
Kate just stared ahead. "What are the odds of that? Kind of creepy right? That you happened to find someone who looks just like you? Weird." Castle said, attempting to make light of the situation for Beckett.
Yet he could see the look on her face, a mixture of dread, horror, and pure astonishment, but not the good type of astonishment. The kind that made you fear for what was going to happen next.
So Castle kept talking, trying to bring Beckett back to earth.
"And we can finally catch the guy who killed all those people. I'm sure he left some evidence this time because there is no way you can shoot two people, and try to kill another one, then leave in a hurry without a finger print or a hair left behind, right? So don't worry Kate, everything will be fine. I promise!" He rambled on, hoping to get her to even look at him, to see her eyes reflecting anything other than shock.
Yet there was no such luck. She just kept staring straight ahead, and looking blankly off into the distance where the ambulance had disappeared into. He touched her arm, and she jumped, looking startled, as if she had forgotten that she was even there.
"Hey, Kate, it will be okay, alright? It's not you on that stretcher, it's just a weird coincidence. Don't worry. We're going to get this guy, just like we always do. I promise."
She looked at him then, and for a second their eyes connected. His held loving sincerity. Her's held desperation, and wildness. She looked like a caged animal, panicking, and begging to be let out.
"Kate?" He said again. "Kate, I promise. It will be alright. I swear."
She drew a shaky breath, and then nodded, and turned to Ryan and Esposito, who had been watching the whole thing, wondering what was the big deal. They knew this case had been taking a huge toll on Beckett, but couldn't understand why the arrival of a person who looked like Beckett would make her react like this. But they left it for later, as she spoke.
"Okay, yeah." she said shakily, "Umm, you two, go check out the crime scene upstairs. I'm, umm, going to go home for a bit. I'll be back later, I, uh, have some stuff to do. Castle, you can go home if you want. Clean up. I'll drop you off and then pick you up when I come back in?"
She finished, still looking off into the distance. The boys didn't know what was up, they couldn't understand why this was such a big deal to Beckett. After all, everybody looked like somebody else, somewhere in the world, right?
But they let it go, and smiled at her, as she walked off towards her car, without a look back, Castle following her looking worried.
They reached the car, and got in silently. Beckett started the car, and stared out into the traffic, slowly pulling out onto the street, and driving. Castle just looked at her, his eyes burning into her skull as if trying to read her mind.
They continued in this manner until they reached Castle's loft, and Beckett parked out front.
"Well," she said, "I'll pick you up later, when I go back in, is that okay? I'll call you first, so that you know I'm coming."
Castle smiled softly at her and then spoke for the first time, asking,
"Kate what's wrong? You've been silent since you saw that crime scene, and look like you've seen a ghost. Who is that girl?" He questioned, looking concerned, but not pushing to hard, knowing that she would just pull away if he did.
"Castle," she said, "It's nothing. Don't worry, I think I'm just tired. I, I'll see you later, K? Just..., I'll see you later." She trailed off, that lost look still in her eyes.
"Fine, okay, I'll see you later." Castle said quietly, hoping that when the time came she would tell him what was wrong.
"I love you."
He reminded her, as he leaned over, gave her a light kiss on the lips, and got out of the car.
"I love you too." Came back to him, as he smiled, and brushed his hand on her cheek, "I'll see you later, drive safely." He said, as he closed the car door, hoping that she would be okay.
Kate pulled into her parking spot at her building mechanically, turning off the engine, grabbing her keys and bag, and walking into the building.
She reached her apartment and unlocked the door, closing it and locking the deadbolt.
She put her things down, her gun in the safe, and then went over to the couch. She sat there for a moment, trying to stay calm, breathing deeply, before she couldn't hold it in any longer and she lost it.
Her whole body shuddered, and she shoved her fist in her mouth to keep from screaming. It was no use though, the high keeping sound she heard coming from her mouth not even close to the emotion she felt inside of her.
Tears started streaming down her face, her whole body was shuddering, and she gave up trying to muffle her cries, curling up into the fetal position on the couch, a pillow crushed in her arms, her body wracked with sobs.
She rocked back and forth, gasping for air, her sorrow consuming her as she sobbed, trying to hold herself together, to ground herself to the earth.
She was falling, and wasn't even fighting it anymore. The pain she felt was soaring through her body, infiltrating her veins, and pulling her under, as she went back to that horrible day, the day her life turned to hell.